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ProfessorFart

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Posts posted by ProfessorFart

  1. I wouldn't say mocking.

    It's just the general timbre of non drinkers which gives me the hump!

    'OOooh I don't drink because Tee Rak says I have to be in bed by 9pm for Buddha'

    and that sort of titwash.

    I'm a liberal chap but there is no need to 'High Horse' your preferences online.

    The OP posted because he wanted to highlight the fact that he couldn't - in the words of Derek and Clive - 'pull a facking biird' while sober but were he full of what Wodehouse so beautifully called 'The Sauce' his bottom would be;- in the words of the majestic Jasper Carrott - 'Like a bloomin' sewin' machine'.

    Advice was given to him to try some of said 'Sauce' and then he could pull the aforementioned 'facking bird' - and in my limited experience of such matters, several moments later his bottom would probably indeed be like a 'bloomin' sewin' machine'

    I could be wrong but it all looks like if that weren't writ by a holy bloke then we're all doomed.

    Now....

    Silence Class...where was I before Thai Visa so interuppted me....

    Matthew Verse 16 Chapter 4 children...

    'And did them feet....

  2. Jaideeguy, (crappy handle)

    Its not the not drinking but the 'my shit don't stink' attitude non drinkers seem to get especially here.

    I find it funny when I see chaps belting off about 'Expats who spend all day in Bars' when thats probably what they did during their first five trips here and little else.

    Drinking isn't an evil unless you're a Methodist dick like one finds in Lancashire. Yorkshire and many parts of the US.

    It's just something people do.

    For some, especially the English (and our offspring) the Germans and the Scandic nations it's a cultural activity.

    By decrying our drinking, you are debasing our (and probably your own) culture.

    Seriously, if you lack the imagination to live without alcohol then you guys have the problem, not we Band of Stumbly Brothers

  3. Non drinkers are more sanctimonious then non smokers.

    I take it then that none of you drink then you, just get your whores sober, and she has a shit night out before she has to be with you precious fools.

    Yup. We all need a night off the ale but we get over it.

    Try reading a book, try watching TV, try waiting for the wife to go out and have a crafty frap like you would when you were back in Twatsville Tennessseeeee with Glooooreaah.

    That is to say, doing what you have done all your lives before Oh Glooreeeeah!! ran off with One armed Dave from the Knackersack Yard!

    Goshdarn it! If it didn't do your 'staring at the picture of Jeeesus Nights to see who could see him move fuurrst' - right in, but you lived with it and moved to Thailand!

    I cry that you find you have to come to a country of happy alkies!!!!

    The problem really lies with the fact that you're stuck with a woman you can't communicate with!

    My advice! Don't wank off here about how great you are. Go learn Thai!!

    It gets better then! Really! You can BOTH go for a beer!

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