I simply despair at the utterly pathetic neediness of absurd calculations like this.
But of course it gives media outlets like you wonderful clickbait (it's utterly unbelievable, yet given headline prominence by a supposedly trustworthy webnews outlet: "we didn't say it, we're only reporting it (oh, in our daily major headlines)"
Can't you just make your headline stories stuff we need to see, and not jokes?
Why give such a totally absurd tale prominence in your 'headline stories'? Her, I guess you're desperate too....