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About fangless

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  1. Thailand to ease some restrictions next Monday, COVID-19 zones adjusted - Thailand News - Thai Visa Forum The above article ends with this sentence; "All zones are to maintain a ban on the sale and consumption of alcohol in public venues." I assume that a restaurant is a public venue!
  2. After hearing a couple's complaints that their intimate life wasn't what it used to be, the sex counsellor suggested they vary their choice of positions. "For example," he suggested, "you might try the wheelbarrow? Just lift her legs from behind and insert your thingy and off you go!" The eager husband was all for trying this new idea as soon as they got home. "Well, okay,.." the hesitant wife agreed, "...but on two conditions. First, if it hurts you have to stop right away, and second... you have to promise we won't go past my parents' house!"
  3. That is easily solved; just turn round and instead of pushing the wheelbarrow you pull it behind you! Another reason for pulling rather than pushing is if your Irish and it is full of four-leaf clovers as you really shouldn't push your luck.
  4. Does that one get a high note-able score in your top ten or is it just sweet music to your ears?
  5. A kindly man came across a young boy whose cart had shed its load of manure. "Come back with me," he said, "we'll get you cleaned up, have a spot of lunch then I'll bring back my two sons to help you clear the road." The boy hesitated. "I'm not sure," he faltered, "my dad might not like that." "I think your dad will be pleased you're doing something about it," said the man and eventually the boy was persuaded. A couple of hours later, they returned with his two sons to begin clearing the load. "By the way, where is your dad?" asked the man. "Under the manur
  6. A little boy went shopping with his mother and when she began trying some clothes on in the fitting room, he remarked, "You've got big balloons, Mum." "That's not the right word for them," she replied, "why do you call them that?" "Because yesterday I saw Daddy blowing up the au pair's."
  7. A farmer was getting fewer and fewer eggs from his hens and decided he would have to replace the old rooster who obviously wasn't carrying out his job properly. So he bought a new rooster. Later in the henhouse the old rooster turned to the new rooster and said, "Look, let's make a deal. Let me just have three of the hens and I'll leave the rest to you." "No way," came the reply. "This is all mine now." "OK," said the crestfallen rooster, "but let me have some pride. Let's have a race across the farmyard and back, just give me a 5 yard start, winner takes all." "Alright," said t
  8. Did you hear about the woman who loved making archery supplies? Every day she went to work, she quivered with joy! The past, the present and the future all walk into a bar. It was tense. Why did the hipster burn his mouth on pizza? Because he ate it before it was cool.
  9. I was going to tell a joke about a dead parrot, but it was way too Macawbre. How do trees feel in the Spring? Relieved. Did you hear about the difficult sale on paddles? It was quite the oar-deal.
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