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Marrying a "rich" westerner may not be a "dream come true" - says BBC


webfact

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13 hours ago, Bullie said:

Since thai law is stacked in favour of thai nationals I very much doubt if it would NOT be a bed of roses. Whichever way a marriage turns out the girl will always, always come out ahead. Especially if a car , house, land is bought and a pre-nup avoided.

 

I' d happily settle for the few thorns involved on that sweet smelling bed.

Odds are stacked in favour of women in the west.

The likes of this guy just makes the others with a more genuine relationship expect more and more. The western money trees are ripe for picking...

Well done BBC, thanks a bunch...

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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This is a terrible report by the BBC, I am surprised it wasn't the dreadful Stacy Dooley.

It gives no balance to the situation at all, as normal.

All it tells Thai women is westerners are loaded, and if you are not refurbishing mother's house in Nackon Nowhere, putting her kids through school and generally squandering money you are a no good kii-neow.

I wouldn't be surprised to find out the programme producer is an overweight sour faced divorcee whose ex-husband married a Thai girl.

But I'm just a cynic...

 

 

 

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12 hours ago, TheGhostWithin said:

Yes, the problem is that many do not want to be educated. I know a mother in law that was offered English classes by the government but told them she wouldn't take them, "why would she ever need to learn English?", she told her daughter. The daughter reminded her of her Farang son in law  "Oh, but he will learn Thai", she said. She had forgotten  the number of times she had sniggered at his attempts to communicate in Thai with her because his tone was slightly off or perhaps the wrong word was used. She had failed to notice that he had stopped talking to her more than a year before as a result of that sniggering when he spoke Thai and refusal to learn English, which he percieved as resistance to the reality his daughter was now in a dual culture world. She still continues to try to turn her son in law into a little Thai man, subservient, obedient, but Farang enough to ensure she always gets to order whatever she wants for dinner and shop whereever she wants when out in Bangkok.

 

There are always two sides to the story, and both sides need to be open to be educated before anything will work.

Actually there are three sides, his side, her side, and the truth. 

My daughter taught me that

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17 hours ago, webfact said:

Of those 320 one in three or more than 30% were previously married to Thais and had divorced or separated and often had children from that previous relationship.

 

So much so that these days there is even pressure from Thai parents and families to find a westerner after Thai relationships went sour.

Uh yeah.  No surprise there.  The woman often is now saddled with the responsibility of raising the child and usually has few resources or opportunities to afford that.  I can't fault the ladies for looking at options such as hooking up with a farang.

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Overall in my experience, the Thais expect the farang to bend much more to the Thai way than vice versa.  But, having said that, I am pretty sure if the Thais were visiting the USA or any other country, the general impression would be that the USA people would be perceived as expecting the Thais to bend more to the USA way.  Home field rules

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6 hours ago, smotherb said:

No, his message was don't get married and have only rich girlfriends.

Well then my message to him would be: As for the girlfriend and me, she wants money. I want sex. The rest we work out as necessary ... and I'm more than willing to occasionally pay her family for the privilege of not being married.

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18 hours ago, ratcatcher said:

What the BBC failed to mention was just how so many foreigners meet Thai country girls in the first place.They certainly do not have conducted tours for foreign tourists to the villages of Isaan or rural Thailand.

 

What exactly did the BBC fail to mention? Wouldn't most of met via online dating sites, like countless others do all over the world these days?  If so, why would the BBC need to mention anything about online dating sites?

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4 minutes ago, Gregster said:

What exactly did the BBC fail to mention? Wouldn't most of met via online dating sites, like countless others do all over the world these days?  If so, why would the BBC need to mention anything about online dating sites?

I think he talking about their profession and where they work.

Can't you can find hookers or short-timers in most shops?

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3 minutes ago, inThailand said:

I think he talking about their profession and where they work.

Can't you can find hookers or short-timers in most shops?

Don't know. Have never looked in "shops". But have seen thousands of beautiful, educated, respectively employed ladies on Thai dating sites. 

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Well if you want to say I'm a Luddite OK but (per Judy Garland) I don't know that anyone can ever say "ZING went the strings of my heart" when you first meet someone on a dating site.

BTW per the above I think you meant "respectably" as "respectively" means one after another.

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Well there is the old adage, "why buy the cow when you can get the milk as and when needed".

 

Relationships worked better for me, test the situation first and see what happens. This has save me and potential partners a lot of problems and regrets over a long time here in "The Kingdom".

 

Ah' to go back to the 60's things were a lot simpler than!

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53 minutes ago, manarak said:

it would be more interesting to know which precise "cultural difficulties" were encountered.

From both parties I'll start 1 from each

Thai

1. But your my Farang husband who is suppose to be a man of wealth, & those that are wealthy in a Thai family share with all

Farang 

1. The way we do it in the west is we will LOAN family members money (but they don't really like to ask for it) to be paid back 

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As long at "Thai culture" expects daughters to marry (very) young and produce offsprings ..... it will result in the father of the child doing a fast runner. Next thing happens is to blame the girl, who lost her face in the village society as she's left behind with a child (some women need this treatment two or three times, i.e. three kids from three different fathers). 

I have never ever heard of a woman taking the father to responsibility; claiming child support and if not paid - filing the case with the courts. 

Next is - oneway ticket to Red Light district, as the neighbours daughter is doing soooo well in Bangkok's department stores as a cashier (hundred thousands of them) resulting in new dentures of grandpa, gold chains the size of bike bike chains, a bike for the brother and a pick-up for dad. Latter usually happens only, if the girl ties up with a Caucasian. Latter not familiar with the procedure feels sorry for his catch-of-the-day and the girls, more often than not, consider it pay-back time for all the wrong-doings of the father of her child(ren). 

You can take a girl out of a bar but you will not get the bar out of a girl. She has been bought out by the Westener and he can do that anytime again - that's what she thinks. He bought her out and anyone else  can buy her out - that's what he thinks. So, from the very moment they meet it is usually guaranteed to fail. Combine this with the materialistic greed of Thais, dominated with monetary issues and display of wealth following the "keep up with the Jones" - go figure .... (pictures off the internet). 

 

Screenshot 2017-09-21 07.39.06.jpg

Sinsod pending1.jpg

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16 minutes ago, steven100 said:

marry em, give them the house, car, financial support .....   same as in any western society I would say ....:smile:

Not quite. Thai law only divides the assets 50:50 that are acquired AFTER the marriage. Defacto relationships are not recognised.

In Western society, both marriages and defacto relationships of more than one year result in a division 50:50 of all assets, irrespective of when they were acquired.

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21 hours ago, theguyfromanotherforum said:

My wife supports me. I wouldn't have it any other way.

i do hope your joking but in case your not.

 

here we go all TV member's puffing their chest out with all the BS about my ones different she never worked in a bar she loves me and i dont give her any money.:post-4641-1156693976:

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12 minutes ago, Sydebolle said:

As long at "Thai culture" expects daughters to marry (very) young and produce offsprings ..... it will result in the father of the child doing a fast runner. Next thing happens is to blame the girl, who lost her face in the village society as she's left behind with a child (some women need this treatment two or three times, i.e. three kids from three different fathers). 

I have never ever heard of a woman taking the father to responsibility; claiming child support and if not paid - filing the case with the courts. 

Next is - oneway ticket to Red Light district, as the neighbours daughter is doing soooo well in Bangkok's department stores as a cashier (hundred thousands of them) resulting in new dentures of grandpa, gold chains the size of bike bike chains, a bike for the brother and a pick-up for dad. Latter usually happens only, if the girl ties up with a Caucasian. Latter not familiar with the procedure feels sorry for his catch-of-the-day and the girls, more often than not, consider it pay-back time for all the wrong-doings of the father of her child(ren). 

You can take a girl out of a bar but you will not get the bar out of a girl. She has been bought out by the Westener and he can do that anytime again - that's what she thinks. He bought her out and anyone else  can buy her out - that's what he thinks. So, from the very moment they meet it is usually guaranteed to fail. Combine this with the materialistic greed of Thais, dominated with monetary issues and display of wealth following the "keep up with the Jones" - go figure .... (pictures off the internet). 

 

Screenshot 2017-09-21 07.39.06.jpg

Sinsod pending1.jpg

why is mama looking so unhappy ....   ?    is it because he looks 85 ..

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