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The blues, wife seems to be gone


Birdman

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On 10/13/2017 at 11:49 AM, PerkinsCuthbert said:

As an aspiring old fart who was once a decent catch when first arrived here in Bangkok thirty years ago, I resent your tone; you too will be a wrinkly one day, careful of your satang, about whom you will catch (if you have learned any Thai by then) young 'nums' and 'saos' make disparaging comments, when they think you are just another dumb farang past his sell by date.

 

Good luck, you'll need it.

 

There was no tone in his post. There is only bitterness in your post because you choose to live an illusion in Thailand that you know it's not realistic. Yesterday I saw a lot of older graceful men around Emporium with their older and equally graceful (and most likely well off Thai partners). They seemed quite content with their life unlike whiny old men in this forum who think the youth owes them something. 

 

Pathetic.

 

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14 minutes ago, theguyfromanotherforum said:

 

There was no tone in his post. There is only bitterness in your post because you choose to live an illusion in Thailand that you know it's not realistic. Yesterday I saw a lot of older graceful men around Emporium with their older and equally graceful (and most likely well off Thai partners). They seemed quite content with their life unlike whiny old men in this forum who think the youth owes them something. 

 

Pathetic.

 

Bitterness or not, his comment is not that far from reality. 

 

To end your comment with the words...pathetic, is pathetic.

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18 minutes ago, theguyfromanotherforum said:

They seemed quite content with their life unlike whiny old men in this forum who think the youth owes them something. 

 

Pathetic.

Youth owes me nothing, I can pay, cash.

And benefits, 2 young ladies have already finished high school and are now in University at my expense.

You know ....... maybe they do owe me something.

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After reading a lot of the quotes on this thread , ,you can see the problem , guy comes on holiday to Thailand meets bar girl 30 years younger than him ,takes her back home ,and she meets loads of guys her age and decides that one of them is a better catch , to be honest ive seen it so many times in the UK .

I met the wife 20 odd years ago when i was in buisness in BKK  she was as well , now although she is a good bit younger than me she was in her late 20s ,working in her family business and we "courted" for 6 months ,then she came to the UK to see if it would work ,then later we married . 12 years ago we came back here ,she loved the UK and misses her garden ,but also loves it here .

so the moral of the story is ,dont just rush in and marry the first girl that says your so handsome and the 30 year age gap doesnt matter , do what you did back home ,go courting and take it slow , oh yes ,dont marry the first hooker you met in a bar:smile:;

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15 minutes ago, MaeJoMTB said:

More likely delusion/reality levels different.

Two foreign pals recently broke up with their different wives, both women left to seek more money from other, more generous foreigners, both women had decent government jobs.

Both screamed about how theirs were educated, employed, never sex workers, loved them.

Both were with women 20 years younger, I would always ask "Why do these women want you?", "What does a 40 (ish) Thai lady want with a 60 (ish) foreign man?" and they would either say "Thai man not good", or just get angry.

Still I'm always a bit sad when the woman turns out not to be different, I'd like to find one woman that was different, even if it isn't my woman.

My mothers husband was 20 years younger than her....:stoner:

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On 10/13/2017 at 1:29 PM, wwest5829 said:

Preparing to retire, I did what my education prepared me for and did my "due diligence". Read three dozen books from academic cultural studies to "Private Dancer" to get some Thai background. Discovered that 1.) In Asia, age is not an automatic disqualifier, in fact, age is respected (That is why you will be asked your age ... comes into your standing in society). 2.) Your current or past occupation also helps to identify your place in Thai society. 3.) Certainly having a steady source of income comes into play as a reflection of your social standing. Finally, 4.) deserved or not western men have a certain reputation of not running around on their woman. Wow! Retired, so of a certain age, retired Professor, steady retirement income (note that I cannot afford to live in my own country ... well, not as well), and yep, one female is enough of a challenge for me. And I am a student of Buddhism so Thailand sounded good to me. I agree. Find a traditionally raised Thai girl and live in Thailand. Short visits are OK, but do not relocate your Thai girl or you will find you have lost something along the way.

 

Lets try this again professor.

 

If old age is respected here as you claim reading this literature, can you please explain why Thailand doesn't have any social programs that "respects" these old people, but rather relies on their daughters to provide for them?

 

 

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I know a few Farlang/Thai couples here and to be honest their relationships together are weird.

These are either Farlangs with Thai women half their ages, the Farlangs becoming the women`s obedient lackeys or flunkeys believing the sun shines out  their Thai female partners backsides and live their lives trying to keep their Thai wives/girlfriends contented to ensure they stay with them.

Then there are those who have grown bored of the relationship, each one becoming increasingly irritated by the other but stay together nevertheless. Then as in the case of the OP live practically separate lives, have absolutely nothing in common and I wonder why they still describe themselves as a couple?

Sorry, OP, but it appears your Thai wife is no longer in love with you and you only have two options, either tell her the relationship is unsatisfactory and the situation has to change or call it a day and move on accepting the situation for what it is.

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16 minutes ago, theguyfromanotherforum said:

 

Lets try this again professor.

 

If old age is respected here as you claim reading this literature, can you please explain why Thailand doesn't have any social programs that "respects" these old people, but rather relies on their daughters to provide for them?

 

 

You mean like the old age subsidy (minimum at best) or the medical coverage. Quite correct, the 3rd World countries do not have the social programs found in many of our home countries. Then again they do not have the same national income either. Which do you view as more reflective of age respect, putting the parents in an old age home or having them live out their days in the family? Agriculturally based societies around the world, including earlier days in the US saw the "extended family" as the usual arrangement. In the light of full disclosure, I think I would have a "survival" in the U.S. But can live better here becoming a part of a Thai family. In the West we raise our children to be independent and live, in the most part in " nuclear" families. I am still amazed that Thais would not (for the most part) consider traveling/retiring alone to a foreign country. Think it reflects the social outlook of several Asian societies.

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21 hours ago, theguyfromanotherforum said:

 

Lets try this again professor.

 

If old age is respected here as you claim reading this literature, can you please explain why Thailand doesn't have any social programs that "respects" these old people, but rather relies on their daughters to provide for them?

 

 

Good question.

 

Simple answer; they dont give a ratts ass. Brainwashing and faulty conditioning makes certain that a society can not move forward. All this a.o. typical thai cultural traits. 

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21 hours ago, wwest5829 said:

 I am still amazed that Thais would not (for the most part) consider traveling/retiring alone to a foreign country. Think it reflects the social outlook of several Asian societies.

No, in means they see 'our' western society and countries for the shit sandwich they are.

And if the west is so great, why are you posting in this forum?

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2 hours ago, MaeJoMTB said:

No, in means they see 'our' western society and countries for the shit sandwich they are.

And if the west is so great, why are you posting in this forum?

 

This is only partially true, Jo.

 

Certainly, my wife has no desire to move to Canada after she hears her "friends" on Facebook always complaining that money doesn't grow on trees. Heck, I am trying to convince her to just come for a visit.... still a resounding no. She is more curious about taking a trip to visit the now defunct and certainly racist parts of my ex-Yugoslavia. Go figure?

 

Some better off Thais will go to West for education, but will most certainly not stick around. They have better opportunities with their "hiso" degrees at home.

 

I certainly appreciate the passport Canada gave me and the opportunities I had even as being somewhat lazy. 

 

 

 

 

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On ‎10‎/‎15‎/‎2017 at 9:51 AM, theguyfromanotherforum said:

 

Lets try this again professor.

 

If old age is respected here as you claim reading this literature, can you please explain why Thailand doesn't have any social programs that "respects" these old people, but rather relies on their daughters to provide for them?

 

 

Perhaps because they run a capitalist system rather than taxing ( stealing ) poor people's money to bribe voters with unsustainable welfare "promises", as they do in the west.

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2 minutes ago, thaibeachlovers said:

Perhaps because they run a capitalist system rather than taxing ( stealing ) poor people's money to bribe voters with unsustainable welfare "promises", as they do in the west.

 

 

So, you will be  returning your ill gotten gains and surrendering your Western passport then?

 

 

Thought so :sleepy:

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15 hours ago, theguyfromanotherforum said:

 

 

So, you will be  returning your ill gotten gains and surrendering your Western passport then?

 

 

Thought so :sleepy:

That makes no sense at all.

I don't have any "ill gotten gains". I worked for every cent I ever had apart from a small inheritance from my parents, and my pension is my right, not a gift from the government.

The only "ill gotten gains" in my life are what my two ex partners in life took from me without my consent.

 

What does my passport have to do with anything?

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1 minute ago, thaibeachlovers said:

That makes no sense at all.

I don't have any "ill gotten gains". I worked for every cent I ever had apart from a small inheritance from my parents, and my pension is my right, not a gift from the government.

The only "ill gotten gains" in my life are what my two ex partners in life took from me without my consent.

 

What does my passport have to do with anything?

 

But...but...you said the government steals from the poor in the West. Since you are obviously not poor because you enjoy the luxury of living in another country, I thought the government didn't tax you anything....hence you should do the right thing and give some money back.

 

Also by your endless complaining about nanny state, I thought you wanted to live like a "Thai" hence my passport comment.

 

Not for a single moment did I think it would be very hypocritical to whine about theft and corruption back home while you have the security of your passport and wealth you gained in this so called nanny state to back you up. No...not at all.

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17 minutes ago, theguyfromanotherforum said:

 

But...but...you said the government steals from the poor in the West. Since you are obviously not poor because you enjoy the luxury of living in another country, I thought the government didn't tax you anything....hence you should do the right thing and give some money back.

 

Also by your endless complaining about nanny state, I thought you wanted to live like a "Thai" hence my passport comment.

 

Not for a single moment did I think it would be very hypocritical to whine about theft and corruption back home while you have the security of your passport and wealth you gained in this so called nanny state to back you up. No...not at all.

Your attempt to attack me personally is so convoluted that it makes no sense at all.

 

By "give back" you imply I got something I wasn't entitled to, which isn't the case, unless you are saying I should give back my wages to my employers, and I don't know why I would do that.

If I could get a Thai passport, I would have done so long ago, but if you think that is easy, you can't know much about it.

 

wealth you gained in this so called nanny state :cheesy: x a million.

I get to stay in Thailand because I do live like a Thai while I'm here.

Wealthy? I wish I was.

 

Nanny state- start a thread on the farang pub sub forum and I'll discuss that there, but not here.

 

security of your passport

555555555555555

Passports only give one the ability to enter other countries. I have no idea why you think they impart security.

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1 minute ago, thaibeachlovers said:

Your attempt to attack me personally is so convoluted that it makes no sense at all.

 

By "give back" you imply I got something I wasn't entitled to, which isn't the case, unless you are saying I should give back my wages to my employers, and I don't know why I would do that.

If I could get a Thai passport, I would have done so long ago, but if you think that is easy, you can't know much about it.

 

wealth you gained in this so called nanny state :cheesy: x a million.

I get to stay in Thailand because I do live like a Thai while I'm here.

Wealthy? I wish I was.

 

Nanny state- start a thread on the farang pub sub forum and I'll discuss that there, but not here.

 

security of your passport

555555555555555

Passports only give one the ability to enter other countries. I have no idea why you think they impart security.

 

You will obviously never know what being poor really is...probably because you lived a sheltered life in a nanny state.

 

I'm not attacking you....I am genuinely curious why so many like to bash the country they come from? Perhaps that's why Thais are "winning" as we Farangs don't even have respect for ourselves.

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9 minutes ago, theguyfromanotherforum said:

 

You will obviously never know what being poor really is...probably because you lived a sheltered life in a nanny state.

 

I'm not attacking you....I am genuinely curious why so many like to bash the country they come from? Perhaps that's why Thais are "winning" as we Farangs don't even have respect for ourselves.

LOL.

I spent almost half my working life in NON nanny state countries. Antarctica in the 70s was pretty frontier stuff ( if we got seriously injured in the winter we would have died etc etc ), and I also worked in other countries where there was no nanny state.

 

I have also lived in Thailand for many years, and as we know, that is not a nanny state.

 

why so many like to bash the country they come from?

I'd love to discuss that with you, but on the farang pub sub forum, not on here. By all means start a thread, and I'll be on it like a robber's dog.

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19 hours ago, theguyfromanotherforum said:

 

You will obviously never know what being poor really is...probably because you lived a sheltered life in a nanny state.

 

I'm not attacking you....I am genuinely curious why so many like to bash the country they come from? Perhaps that's why Thais are "winning" as we Farangs don't even have respect for ourselves.

Your last sentence could not be closer to the truth. The moment we respect ourselves, interprete that how you desire, we see the true nature of the the thai people we deal with in day to day life. Towards us. A plenty like the farang to be an ignoramus.

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Your last sentence could not be closer to the truth. The moment we respect ourselves, interprete that how you desire, we see the true nature of the the thai people we deal with in day to day life. Towards us. A plenty like the farang to be an ignoramus.


Indeed
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  • 3 weeks later...
On 10/12/2017 at 9:59 PM, scubascuba3 said:

I don't think taking a Thai girl back is a good idea. The main reason is there are loads of guys back home, younger, better looking and maybe more money. If it isn't true love then they may get a better offer

Agreed.  My wife is inundated here with proposals from guys dying to get in her pants or marry her even.  Back home it would be even worse.  I don't worry about her because I don't want to be with someone who wants something else.  She is free to go anytime she wants.  We have invested a lot in our relationship and we both get a lot out of it.  Who knows what the future holds.  I am sure she could do better than me but she stays.  Funny story, I remember my ex-wife during our worst period telling me "Next time, I will marry for money".  I told her "Good luck.  Next time, I will marry for love".  I bet that shot STILL hurts.

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On 10/13/2017 at 7:53 AM, catman20 said:

most of these thai ladies are only with these old farts cos they have no other choice.

i see the body language of these ladies and the old guy cant or dont want to see it. its sad.

Kind of true.

 

If you want to marry a Thai woman who will stick with you - have kids with her. That's the only way she won't run from you.

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On 10/13/2017 at 7:53 AM, catman20 said:

most of these thai ladies are only with these old farts cos they have no other choice.

 

My wife had plenty of other choices, but the younger (Thai) choices couldn't pay the price she wanted.

(Or put up with all the sH*t she handed out)

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