Jump to content

Did I make a mistake? Should she get a job?


Recommended Posts

As always expecting the good the bad and the ugly responses here :)

 

I need to work on the computer sometimes for my company in the UK and the misses gets a bit bored hanging around the condo. Recently she has started hanging around with a friend in a girly bar which I don't really mind but miffs me a little as I would like to be in there too!

 

She still expects a 'salary' from me etc but just told her outright - no more salary from farang until you get a normal job. I have told her I am not finishing with her but as part of a social experiment I want to see how this works out - i.e will I have a misses next week.

 

I am not struggling for cash so not worried about the money but its the principle - anyone been through a similar situation?

Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Replies 227
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Do you want a salaried employee or a Girlfriend ? Employees get a salary and may change jobs on a whim. 

The social experiment is really only testing the loyalty of an employee.

Maybe if you framed the whole thing as a GF you are willing to support etc, but you want her to contribute and see the results.

"Get a job or the salary stops", yes you wont have a missus next week.

"You are my GF and I want to take care of you, but I would like you to get a job, contribute etc and you may have a missus next week, even one with a job.

 

 

Link to post
Share on other sites

Sounds like you are on track to be looking for a new GF.

Next time make it clear from start you only pay for what you benefit from ie rent food, household bills etc, but she doesn't get anything in the way of an "allowance", and if she wants her own money she has to earn it herself.

I paid all household expenses and the ex went out to work, but I ended up giving her money for MIL funeral which I came to regret, as I never got that substantial "loan" back.

Link to post
Share on other sites

What does the OP mean by Misses? If he`s paying her a salary then she`s a rent a wife/girlfriend/female companion.  If this is a proper relationship then it should be 50/50 both pulling their weight and building a future together. Why shouldn`t she get a job?

 

There has to be something fundamentally wrong with guys that have to pay women to be their girlfriends.

 

Men get the women they deserve.

Link to post
Share on other sites

I'd leave................ But in the past I have been lonely enough to have tried the old save her routine.

Up to you as they say.

Refusing money is a sure fire way for the GF to hear 'I don't love you enough to take care of you'

 

But I am often wrong!

Link to post
Share on other sites
1 hour ago, spermwhale said:

Hanging out in a girlie bar. That should be your cue to exit stage left. Get a quality girl cuz your girl is trashy if that's where she wants to spend her time. 

 

Amen!

Link to post
Share on other sites
1 hour ago, cyberfarang said:

What does the OP mean by Misses? If he`s paying her a salary then she`s a rent a wife/girlfriend/female companion.  If this is a proper relationship then it should be 50/50 both pulling their weight and building a future together. Why shouldn`t she get a job?

 

There has to be something fundamentally wrong with guys that have to pay women to be their girlfriends.

 

Men get the women they deserve.

If I was back in US and my wife made the same salary as me I would maybe agree with 50/50 split with finances but as the wages here are a fraction of what I or the OP make I say a portion of the expenses should be taken care of by GF . If she is his wife  I am kinda old school if she is bored get a job but how many women in US are just "housewifes" they only take care of the home/children they don't work outside the home. Hubby's job to bring home the bacon (money)

Link to post
Share on other sites

I took exactly the same approach as the OP. I wasn't having a lady of leisure sitting around the house for 12 hours a day when I worked. The deal was she got a job and contributed to the running of the home. There would be no professional girlfriend bs but I'd happily pick up the rent check and buy the groceries as my earning power is 10x hers (basic housekeeping). I have even tried the "I've suddenly run out of money" test and she's helped me out financially rather than jumped ship. No financial demands on her part. She earns enough to have the odd night out at the weekend; buy herself make up, shoes, phones, bags etc and other essential girly things, while saving the rest to do with as she pleases. I refuse to give her money for her family as I've never met them. If she wants to send her money home, that's her choice. We're still together 3 years on.

Sent from my SM-J510FN using Tapatalk

Link to post
Share on other sites

If she's not coming from the bar world then theres problem. The bargirls are going to tell her' that's a good looking guy,  why dont you go with him.' just because they want her as same level as themselfes.  Had many bargirls so i know the drill. The problem will be bigger as soon as she start saying she's going out because of some friends birthday or friends last day before she go home etc etc. 

Link to post
Share on other sites

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    No registered users viewing this page.


×
×
  • Create New...