Did I make a mistake? Should she get a job?

[Thai Ron]

On 11/29/2017 at 11:12 AM, Wake Up said:

You have never had a professional girlfriend. I feel sorry for you. That is like saying out loud you never had great sex but some guys don’t know what they are missing. Luckily you don’t. 

You poor, poor man.

You can only have great sex with someone you're paying??

Obviously, some deep-seated, Judeo-Christian guilt-ridden BS going on there..........

[Wake Up]

6 minutes ago, Thai Ron said:

Totally missing the point - nothing wrong with a girl liking girlie bars if she's there as a punter.

His issue is that she could be going with the customers.

Girls are not stupid. Pay them properly and be kind and you don’t need to worry. I agree part of the payment arrangement for me is for clean sex so no outside partners unless otherwised agreed. I know another guy that enjoys a free for all and his girl can do whatever she wants in her off time. 

 

Girls don’t want to lose a quality employer. If you are cheap and arrogant and controlling then worry. If you are not and your girl steps out on you —one of her competitors will be in your ear trying to take her “job”. 

 

I hear guys brag they pay their girl nothing or 10,000 baht a month and they are the “boss”. They are the “boss”but only in their mind. Trying to control a woman for low pay and a controlling attitude to me is a disaster and you get what you deserve. Economics and attitude plays an important role in every relationship in the planet.  But payment or no payment is up to the OP to decide. 

[Thai Ron]

1 minute ago, Wake Up said:

Girls are not stupid. Pay them properly and be kind and you don’t need to worry. I agree part of the payment arrangement for me is for clean sex so no outside partners unless otherwised agreed. I know another guy that enjoys a free for all and his girl can do whatever she wants in her off time. 

 

Girls don’t want to lose a quality employer. If you are cheap and arrogant and controlling then worry. If you are not and your girl steps out on you —one of her competitors will be in your ear trying to take her “job”. 

 

I hear guys brag they pay their girl nothing or 10,000 baht a month and they are the “boss”. They are the “boss”but only in their mind. Trying to control a woman for low pay and a controlling attitude to me is a disaster and you get what you deserve. Economics and attitude plays an important role in every relationship in the planet.  But payment or no payment is up to the OP to decide. 

 

What century are you from, mate?

Real men don't need to "control" a woman or establish who's "boss".

The only ones who do are those who live in perpetual fear of loss

 

If a salaried hooker wants to play away, she'll play away regardless of what you pay her.

I know this for a fact having been the guy a number of professional girlfriends have cheated on their very generous benefactors with

 

There may be truth in what you're saying about paying salaries - I don't know, I don't sniff around women with financial imperatives (except on the very rare occasion I want to take a prostitute)

For partners/dates etc, I aim for women further up the socio-economic ladder because that's what I was used to in England.

This policy has worked well enough for me so no reason to changed

Nothing snobbish about it - I didn't go for council estate single mother/baby machines trying to raise their living standards in London just because they had a nice body so it stands to reason I wouldn't do it here

 

 

[Wake Up]

1 hour ago, Thai Ron said:

 

What century are you from, mate?

Real men don't need to "control" a woman or establish who's "boss".

The only ones who do are those who live in perpetual fear of loss

 

If a salaried hooker wants to play away, she'll play away regardless of what you pay her.

I know this for a fact having been the guy a number of professional girlfriends have cheated on their very generous benefactors with

 

There may be truth in what you're saying about paying salaries - I don't know, I don't sniff around women with financial imperatives (except on the very rare occasion I want to take a prostitute)

For partners/dates etc, I aim for women further up the socio-economic ladder because that's what I was used to in England.

This policy has worked well enough for me so no reason to changed

Nothing snobbish about it - I didn't go for council estate single mother/baby machines trying to raise their living standards in London just because they had a nice body so it stands to reason I wouldn't do it here

 

 

Whatever works for you is good for you.  But OP asked for opinions and advice and I gave him mine and you can give him yours. I don’t believe one life for all exists as we are all not clones wanting the same things. 

[thaibeachlovers]

2 hours ago, Thai Ron said:

You poor, poor man.

You can only have great sex with someone you're paying??

Obviously, some deep-seated, Judeo-Christian guilt-ridden BS going on there..........

I never realised just how bad sex was with the sex for free western girls I went with till I arrived in the pleasure dome of LOS.

[Wake Up]

2 hours ago, Thai Ron said:

You poor, poor man.

You can only have great sex with someone you're paying??

Obviously, some deep-seated, Judeo-Christian guilt-ridden BS going on there..........

Never said all great sex I had was paid for. My comments must have hit a cord with you personally that caused a knee jerk attack. Better to let people live the way they choose. Publicly self describing me as “poor poor man”  reveals  some things about your life that are best kept secret by you. Maybe keep that to yourself rather than let the whole world peek inside your soul.  I don’t feel sorry for you as you do what you want to do just lay off the prude partrol  and sex therapist pronouncements - they make you look foolish. Not how does it feel to be attacked back. 

[MaeJoMTB]

25 minutes ago, thaibeachlovers said:

I never realised just how bad sex was with the sex for free western girls I went with till I arrived in the pleasure dome of LOS.

I agree, paid for sex has always been better for me.

What food tastes better, food you cooked at home, or food you paid a 5* chef to cook?

Which holiday is better, the one you had at home for free, or the long distance beach holiday you paid $$$$ for?

[BV70]

I agree, paid for sex has always been better for me.
What food tastes better, food you cooked at home, or food you paid a 5* chef to cook?
Which holiday is better, the one you had at home for free, or the long distance beach holiday you paid $$$$ for?

That reply has genuinely surprised me and ain't my experience at all. Consensual sex with a meeting of minds to match a meeting of loins, with the emotion and passion and, dare i say it love, is a darn sight more fulfilling than going through the motions with someone who dislikes you but plays the game, fakes emotion, enjoyment, pleasure and orgasm til you open your wallet and is the least fulfilling sex one could ever experience. Each to their own I suppose but I prefer my wife's cooking to any 5* restaurant, albeit she's a qualified chef.

Sent from my SM-J510FN using Tapatalk

[SoulWater]

LATEST UPDATE: we are moving from our current condo into a large house the relationship is becoming more serious - we have even discussed buying a dog! Also I have met her son a few times and he is a very cool dude that I get on with quite well so money aside the relationship appears to have legs :)

[MaeJoMTB]

1 hour ago, BV70 said:

That reply has genuinely surprised me and ain't my experience at all. Consensual sex with a meeting of minds to match a meeting of loins, with the emotion and passion and, dare i say it love, is a darn sight more fulfilling than going through the motions with someone who dislikes you but plays the game, fakes emotion, enjoyment, pleasure and orgasm til you open your wallet and is the least fulfilling sex one could ever experience. Each to their own I suppose but I prefer my wife's cooking to any 5* restaurant, albeit she's a qualified chef.

 

My former English wife used to fake orgasms, she didn't make much effort with the faking on our bi-yearly shags.

The Thai hookers are way better at faking it, the Filipino hookers are about the same level as my former wife (but more frequent).

I don't particularly care about 'her' orgasms (real or faked), enjoyment of sex is for men, and I prefer a trained expert as a bedmate.

As for female emotions, they're all fake, at least a hooker is fairly honest about what's happening.

 

When you pay to have your car serviced, do you worry if the mechanic enjoys his job? or do you just want it done right?

 

What was the topic again?

[MaeJoMTB]

1 hour ago, SoulWater said:

LATEST UPDATE: we are moving from our current condo into a large house the relationship is becoming more serious - we have even discussed buying a dog! Also I have met her son a few times and he is a very cool dude that I get on with quite well so money aside the relationship appears to have legs :)

Renting the house?

[SoulWater]

Doesn't everyone in Thailand

[bazza73]

5 minutes ago, MaeJoMTB said:

My former English wife used to fake orgasms, she didn't make much effort with the faking on our bi-yearly shags.

The Thai hookers are way better at faking it, the Filipino hookers are about the same level as my former wife (but more frequent).

I don't particularly care about 'her' orgasms (real or faked), enjoyment of sex is for men, and I prefer a trained expert as a bedmate.

 

When you pay to have your car serviced, do you worry if the mechanic enjoys his job? or do you just want it done right?

My ex-wife didn't even bother to fake it. Just get it over with.

I do enjoy sex more when the woman I am with enjoys it too. Woman are quite capable of enjoying sex, it's not reserved for men only.

[totally thaied up]

2 hours ago, MaeJoMTB said:

I agree, paid for sex has always been better for me.

What food tastes better, food you cooked at home, or food you paid a 5* chef to cook?

Which holiday is better, the one you had at home for free, or the long distance beach holiday you paid $$$$ for?

I like this post. No, in fact, I love this post as it is truthful.

 

I punted and hunted for years. In the end, it just was the fact the girls, though young and beautiful and the fact that there was a never-ending source of them was fun, but the lies and the game playing just got to me. 

 

So now I am once again married, and I am pretty happy. I like eating at home, and my wife gives me enough leeway to go out but the days of goofing around are just not in me.

 

I don't think it is a fact of free sex (and it's never free if you're married) but the fact sometimes you just want someone and something to call your own. 

 

The truth of it, the number of girls and bargirls I saw over the years that had boyfriends/partners/husbands or whatever else on the side and honestly, I cannot remember how many I had been with, tell me a story. I have other friends much worse than me by a country mile, and they treat it as a challenge to play the above game, and most are starting to hate it.

 

This story to me is just almost with any girl here, you cannot know what they are going to do (in if they want you really or only there to use you) and I have seen enough evidence to just think that point to myself.  Paying is simple but the games are just no more fun, and for a few of my friends, the games now being played are on a way different level and I can or would not want to, live that life again.

[Wake Up]

3 hours ago, BV70 said:

 

 

That reply has genuinely surprised me and ain't my experience at all. Consensual sex with a meeting of minds to match a meeting of loins, with the emotion and passion and, dare i say it love, is a darn sight more fulfilling than going through the motions with someone who dislikes you but plays the game, fakes emotion, enjoyment, pleasure and orgasm til you open your wallet and is the least fulfilling sex one could ever experience. Each to their own I suppose but I prefer my wife's cooking to any 5* restaurant, albeit she's a qualified chef.

Sent from my SM-J510FN using Tapatalk
 

 

You have the choice to see life and feel whatever emotion makes you comfortable and I agree to each his own. There was day I was thought the same as you. Then I happened upon a true professional in Nana plaza. A sex teacher with a smoking hot body and sharp mind and wild soul.  It was mind blowing fun and worth every cent. In a month she changed me from a guy who jumped on top to a real lover who takes his time with his mouth and body and all of hers. Too bad a rich Frenchman took her away to Paris but I am happy for him. But she opened a door that showed me sex is a pleasure food and I like a variety of pleasure food and some women I like to call professionals know how to make you not think about anything but ecstasy. Never had that type of pleasure in the sex you describe but not saying it isn’t good for you. For me no desire to ever go back to the sex you describe and no one woman could ever satisfy me again nor do I expect that I should be able to satisfy one women for her life. Really I feel more open and honest with my sexual partners now than I ever did before and take it a day at a time. 

[BV70]

You have the choice to see life and feel whatever emotion makes you comfortable and I agree to each his own. There was day I was thought the same as you. Then I happened upon a true professional in Nana plaza. A sex teacher with a smoking hot body and sharp mind and wild soul.  It was mind blowing fun and worth every cent. In a month she changed me from a guy who jumped on top to a real lover who takes his time with his mouth and body and all of hers. Too bad a rich Frenchman took her away to Paris but I am happy for him. But she opened a door that showed me sex is a pleasure food and I like a variety of pleasure food and some women I like to call professionals know how to make you not think about anything but ecstasy. Never had that type of pleasure in the sex you describe but not saying it isn’t good for you. For me no desire to ever go back to the sex you describe and no one woman could ever satisfy me again nor do I expect that I should be able to satisfy one women for her life. Really I feel more open and honest with my sexual partners now than I ever did before and take it a day at a time. 

That's good to know. And whatever floats your boat. I must be lucky, in that my sexual awakening occurred with a 17 year old Canadian chick with self esteem issues and big **** who'd clearly watched too much porn. Far too skilful for a girl her age. And when I found myself teaching Pattaya's finest how to have proper sex and yet still expected to shell out a thousand baht for the pleasure, I thought maybe the P4P approach was a bit false. Not once did they offer to pay me

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[Rc2702]

On 27/11/2017 at 9:38 PM, thaibeachlovers said:

Sounds like you are on track to be looking for a new GF.

Next time make it clear from start you only pay for what you benefit from ie rent food, household bills etc, but she doesn't get anything in the way of an "allowance", and if she wants her own money she has to earn it herself.

I paid all household expenses and the ex went out to work, but I ended up giving her money for MIL funeral which I came to regret, as I never got that substantial "loan" back.

Substantial loan for a funeral in thailand. Average funerals can be done for 25k. Some villages have a system where they pay small fees for the funerals of deceased within village and lavish funerals can cost around 100k. But substantal is a loose term.

[Thai Ron]

18 hours ago, thaibeachlovers said:

I never realised just how bad sex was with the sex for free western girls I went with till I arrived in the pleasure dome of LOS.

Well that probably had more to do with your technique than the Western women.

Women you pay are far more likely to turn on the histrionics 

They have to deliver the experience, after all

[The manic]

On 28/11/2017 at 4:38 AM, thaibeachlovers said:

Sounds like you are on track to be looking for a new GF.

Next time make it clear from start you only pay for what you benefit from ie rent food, household bills etc, but she doesn't get anything in the way of an "allowance", and if she wants her own money she has to earn it herself.

I paid all household expenses and the ex went out to work, but I ended up giving her money for MIL funeral which I came to regret, as I never got that substantial "loan" back.

MIL=sick Buffalo 

[The manic]

On 01/12/2017 at 10:32 AM, totally thaied up said:

Unless the girl is educated and can gain a 'proper' job it is going to be hard. Most of my friends that had girls from an uneducated background that went and got jobs like learning to massage, after several months upgraded to a new or more prosperous farang. If they are hanging around a bar, once again, it will be upgrading to what is better.

 

The upgrade route here is very popular. 

Educated Thai women regard farang as white gorillas.  They want Thai Chinese to date, love with or marry. 

[Thai Ron]

16 hours ago, MaeJoMTB said:

 

I don't particularly care about 'her' orgasms (real or faked), enjoyment of sex is for men, and I prefer a trained expert as a bedmate.

As for female emotions, they're all fake, at least a hooker is fairly honest about what's happening.

 

Well, oddly enough, that mentality is quite prevalent among those who have to pay for it

[Rhys]

Service paid... move on... 

[thaibeachlovers]

On ‎12‎/‎3‎/‎2017 at 5:18 PM, BV70 said:

 

 

That reply has genuinely surprised me and ain't my experience at all. Consensual sex with a meeting of minds to match a meeting of loins, with the emotion and passion and, dare i say it love, is a darn sight more fulfilling than going through the motions with someone who dislikes you but plays the game, fakes emotion, enjoyment, pleasure and orgasm til you open your wallet and is the least fulfilling sex one could ever experience. Each to their own I suppose but I prefer my wife's cooking to any 5* restaurant, albeit she's a qualified chef.

Sent from my SM-J510FN using Tapatalk
 

 

You come at it from the point of view that all P4P sex is without genuine emotion, passion or enjoyment, in fact you have swallowed hook line and sinker the lie that prostitutes dislike all their customers, which is just BS. 

Either you never had a good experience with P4P or you never had P4P. Sex is sex, and not to be confused with "love", even though people that "love" each other have sex.

Coming to Thailand on holiday and spending a few weeks on a nice Thai beach with a beautiful, healthy woman that enjoyed sex can't be beaten, IMO, regardless of if paid for or not. 

[thaibeachlovers]

1 hour ago, Rhys said:

Service paid... move on... 

Someone once said they didn't pay prostitutes to have sex, they paid for them to leave after.

The difference between a BG and a wife is that if the woman starts to make me realise I made a mistake, I can get another BG easily and at no additional expense, while the wife costs me a large sum of money I won't get back.

[The manic]

5 minutes ago, thaibeachlovers said:

You come at it from the point of view that all P4P sex is without genuine emotion, passion or enjoyment, in fact you have swallowed hook line and sinker the lie that prostitutes dislike all their customers, which is just BS. 

Either you never had a good experience with P4P or you never had P4P. Sex is sex, and not to be confused with "love", even though people that "love" each other have sex.

Coming to Thailand on holiday and spending a few weeks on a nice Thai beach with a beautiful, healthy woman that enjoyed sex can't be beaten, IMO, regardless of if paid for or not. 

Exactly. Less of this kumbyah  nonsense about and sex and love. We all pay in one way or another. Some idiots by land and build houses!

[thaibeachlovers]

7 hours ago, Thai Ron said:

Well that probably had more to do with your technique than the Western women.

Women you pay are far more likely to turn on the histrionics 

They have to deliver the experience, after all

With the western women it was two people that had no idea. I didn't go with enough to learn "technique". Why? Because it was hard to find western women that will if one isn't loaded.

Porn is a great way to learn technique, but unfortunately, it was before porn was available in my country. I didn't see my first porn VDO ( John Holmes movie ) till after I split up with my first partner. Decades before the internet. Kids these days have no excuse not to know about technique.

 

For your last 2 sentences you obviously have no idea of what you are talking about.

[bazza73]

4 minutes ago, thaibeachlovers said:

Someone once said they didn't pay prostitutes to have sex, they paid for them to leave after.

The difference between a BG and a wife is that if the woman starts to make me realise I made a mistake, I can get another BG easily and at no additional expense, while the wife costs me a large sum of money I won't get back.

Tom Clancy probably said it best. " What do I know about sex? I'm a married man".

[Thai Ron]

10 minutes ago, The manic said:

We all pay in one way or another. Some idiots by land and build houses!

No, we don't all pay in one way or another.

That mentality only applies if all you want from a woman is sex and, predictably enough, it's the mentality most at work among the bitter men on this forum who've been divorced or otherwise burned.

Of course, some will raise the matter of dinners, cinemas, holidays etc but they're assuming all men hung around with financially challenged women who can't pay their own way.

 

They're dead wrong

 

[Thai Ron]

19 minutes ago, thaibeachlovers said:

With the western women it was two people that had no idea. I didn't go with enough to learn "technique". Why? Because it was hard to find western women that will if one isn't loaded.

 

For your last 2 sentences you obviously have no idea of what you are talking about.

Oh stop it

I wasn't loaded in London - it didn't stop me having insane numbers of women.

You don't need to have loads of partners to learn "technique"

Just an adventurous partner who actually fancies you is all you need.

Of course, if your just banging hookers, it's more likely that they're just telling you they fancy you, isn't it?

[bazza73]

2 minutes ago, Thai Ron said:

Oh stop it

I wasn't loaded in London - it didn't stop me having insane numbers of women.

You don't need to have loads of partners to learn "technique"

Just an adventurous partner who actually fancies you is all you need.

Of course, if your just banging hookers, it's more likely that they're just telling you they fancy you, isn't it?

Oh wow. Thai Ron is a stud. Who would have thought it? I'm going back to believing in the tooth fairy.