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A Bar Girl Versus a Date – Is it really clear the best option?


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2 hours ago, spidermike007 said:

 

 

Well, I would say you are not alone with that opinion. But, you are talking about a higher end massage gal in Bangkok, or a gal who works in a soapy, or a short time gal in Bangkok or Pattaya. We all know the risks inherent in getting involved with such a woman. The chances of having a good relationship are ridiculously low. I honestly believe it is possible for a gal to do 100-300 men and still have a big, open heart, and be capable of a healthy relationship. Beyond that, all bets are off. 

Not so sure about the big open heart now. Perhaps you meant a different body part that has less blood if no oil change has been scheduled. Who knows? Or both. 

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7 hours ago, spidermike007 said:

 

Well, even if she had some regulars, and she only got bar fined 3 nights a week, if she is 26, she could have been working the bars since she was 19. Do the math. That is 150 per year, x 7 years. 1,050. Around the world baby. If she is a massage girl, and is quite pretty, the numbers go up exponentially. Again, say she is 26. Seven years. More than likely one to two a day! That brings up the likely numbers, allowing for vacation time, to between 2,500 and 3,500 men. Or encounters. Call it what you want. It is absolutely impossible after that many sessions, for her to be normal, well adjusted, and to have a positive attitude toward men. Buyer beware.

Expats be aware of this mathematical equation. 

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I think all the numbers mentioned here are more or less irrelevant. Some bar girls are very careful who they go with. And then they do only a limited service. Some girls do this for years and are still more or less normal.

 

Other girls go with anyone and do anything, get full of drugs, etc. They are <deleted>&%#$ up after a few weeks - but I guess at least some of them were already damaged before they even started.

 

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10 minutes ago, OneMoreFarang said:

I think all the numbers mentioned here are more or less irrelevant. Some bar girls are very careful who they go with. And then they do only a limited service. Some girls do this for years and are still more or less normal.

 

Other girls go with anyone and do anything, get full of drugs, etc. They are <deleted>&%#$ up after a few weeks - but I guess at least some of them were already damaged before they even started.

 

The smart ones would find 2 or 3 significant payers and milk them. Only the dumb ones would do a 1000.

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41 minutes ago, Justfine said:

The smart ones would find 2 or 3 significant payers and milk them. Only the dumb ones would do a 1000.

or the ones that like the random sex ...........

 

You are trying to use male logic about women, and women from a wildly different culture to your own.

I've met some Thai girls that wanted the sex, and that was why they worked in bars.

I've met some Thai girls that were alcoholic/drugged party animals, and the money was just used to extend the party.

I've met some that appeared to be looking for husbands.

And yeah, I've met some that claimed to be doing it for the money.

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30 minutes ago, MaeJoMTB said:

or the ones that like the random sex ...........

 

You are trying to use male logic about women, and women from a wildly different culture to your own.

I've met some Thai girls that wanted the sex, and that was why they worked in bars.

I've met some Thai girls that were alcoholic/drugged party animals, and the money was just used to extend the party.

I've met some that appeared to be looking for husbands.

And yeah, I've met some that claimed to be doing it for the money.

Studies have been done on this. Only a small % do it long term and rack up high numbers.

 

Any half decent looking one can find a good payer or 3 and milk them.

 

 

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2 minutes ago, Justfine said:

Studies have been done on this. Only a small % do it long term and rack up high numbers.

Any half decent looking one can find a good payer or 3 and milk them.

Link to study of Thai hookers motives or it never happened .............

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2 hours ago, MaeJoMTB said:

or the ones that like the random sex ...........

 

You are trying to use male logic about women, and women from a wildly different culture to your own.

I've met some Thai girls that wanted the sex, and that was why they worked in bars.

I've met some Thai girls that were alcoholic/drugged party animals, and the money was just used to extend the party.

I've met some that appeared to be looking for husbands.

And yeah, I've met some that claimed to be doing it for the money.

 

Many years ago I was with a short time gal, at a massage place. After we were done, I asked her if she was going out to a club. She said no. I asked why not. She said if she went to a club, she would find a guy who wanted long time, or all night. She said she could not imagine something more boring. She said why would I want to be with one guy, when I could be with three or four guys, in one night, and see many different units. I found that fascinating. She seemed to enjoy the rush of the whole thing.

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On 1/17/2018 at 9:52 AM, Get Real said:

On the Moon? You must definitely be higher than me, then.

As of today we are using the same Internet, and that is something that has not been developed on the moon yet as well as no houses or residencies.

Yeah, the rest you can probably figure out yourself, even if it takes a couple of days.

Cute but passive aggressive.  Your location says the moon.  So logically I just figured you lived there...:cheesy:

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On 1/17/2018 at 2:50 PM, spidermike007 said:

 

It is my contention that it depends on a few factors. The first and most important factor is how many? How many men has she been with? If she is relatively new, and has only gotten with between 20-200 men, more than likely she is still sane, and could possess a good heart. If she has gotten with over 200, the chances decrease. If over 500, harder for her to relate to men as decent human beings. Once you get to the "around the world level", where she has been with over 1,000 men, all bets are off. The heart hardens, and more than likely she is bitter for life. I am sure there are exceptions. But, the risk in getting involved with a highly experienced bar girl, or massage girl, is great.

 

With the exception of the men who are clever enough to hire a private detective to look into her background, and pay some real money to do it right, there is no way to know. They all have stories. And most of the stories are ones that they know we want to hear. So many times I have heard friends say,  "Oh no, she is new. She has only been working at the bar two weeks. I was her first customer. She worked in a factory before that. I could tell how innocent she was'. Yeah right!

 

Having said that, I consider most sex workers in Thailand, to be far, far more honest than the average American woman. At least here, a man knows where he stands, if he wants sex with a woman. In a minute, you can determine exactly what it will require financially, and what you will get in return. In the US, it can take multiple dates, and countless dinners and gifts, to get to the precious zone. There is no set price. There is no knowing what it is going to take. Many of the women I have dated, have been with hundreds of men, in a similar way as many of the massage girls here. And those men have paid dearly. The only difference was that the price was not stated up front. 

Nice summation! "But, the risk in getting involved with a highly experienced bar girl, or massage girl, is great." Carve it in stone!!!

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On ‎1‎/‎18‎/‎2018 at 9:45 AM, spidermike007 said:

 

Well, even if she had some regulars, and she only got bar fined 3 nights a week, if she is 26, she could have been working the bars since she was 19. Do the math. That is 150 per year, x 7 years. 1,050. Around the world baby. If she is a massage girl, and is quite pretty, the numbers go up exponentially. Again, say she is 26. Seven years. More than likely one to two a day! That brings up the likely numbers, allowing for vacation time, to between 2,500 and 3,500 men. Or encounters. Call it what you want. It is absolutely impossible after that many sessions, for her to be normal, well adjusted, and to have a positive attitude toward men. Buyer beware.

My western partner had been married before, and told me that she used to stay up late so he'd be asleep when she went to bed, so I don't know how many times, but probably not a lot. Don't think she was particularly into casual sex, so guessing around 10 men other than her husband. However while she was apparently a normal, well adjusted woman with a positive attitude toward men, in fact she was a black hearted b1tch from the bowels of hell.

Otherwise, I've met prostitutes that were quite lovely and well balanced human beings.

Frankly, as long as they aren't crack whores blowing men in cars for a few quid, I don't think the actual "number" of men has much to do with it. The Thai "girlfriend experience" is as different from a short time pro working King's Cross station in London, as sugar is from salt.

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On ‎1‎/‎18‎/‎2018 at 2:11 PM, spidermike007 said:

 

 

Well, I would say you are not alone with that opinion. But, you are talking about a higher end massage gal in Bangkok, or a gal who works in a soapy, or a short time gal in Bangkok or Pattaya. We all know the risks inherent in getting involved with such a woman. The chances of having a good relationship are ridiculously low. I honestly believe it is possible for a gal to do 100-300 men and still have a big, open heart, and be capable of a healthy relationship. Beyond that, all bets are off. 

I would say it's much, much more to do with the sort of men they go with. If the men are predominantly pleasant, eager to please, take them away on holidays with them type guys, I don't think it matters how many men they go with.

I met one rather pleasant lady in the business, and 8 years later she was still rather pleasant. She stopped then because she got married. I've met a few really messed in the head people, and she wasn't one of them. Quite normal, really.

 

BTW, not many of them stay in the business for more than a couple or three years, so thousands of guys isn't the norm, IMO.

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On ‎1‎/‎18‎/‎2018 at 11:29 PM, spidermike007 said:

 

Many years ago I was with a short time gal, at a massage place. After we were done, I asked her if she was going out to a club. She said no. I asked why not. She said if she went to a club, she would find a guy who wanted long time, or all night. She said she could not imagine something more boring. She said why would I want to be with one guy, when I could be with three or four guys, in one night, and see many different units. I found that fascinating. She seemed to enjoy the rush of the whole thing.

She seemed to enjoy the rush of the whole thing.

Western people are so indoctrinated that sex is something naughty and not to be discussed, that the idea a woman would like sex with several different men a day is usually incomprehensible to them.

 

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On 20/01/2018 at 7:41 PM, thaibeachlovers said:

She seemed to enjoy the rush of the whole thing.

Western people are so indoctrinated that sex is something naughty and not to be discussed, that the idea a woman would like sex with several different men a day is usually incomprehensible to them.

 

That's not true. Tinder is successful cause of loose attitudes.

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3 hours ago, Justfine said:

That's not true. Tinder is successful cause of loose attitudes.

 I see that but i think on balance TBL is probably correct. People find it very very difficult to put years of indoctrinated teachings behind them.

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1 minute ago, Gruff said:

 I see that but i think on balance TBL is probably correct. People find it very very difficult to put years of indoctrinated teachings behind them.

That's a generational thing. TBL is 70yo. 20yos don't think like him. The whole guilt church thing stopped 20 years ago.

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Just now, Justfine said:

That's a generational thing. TBL is 70yo. 20yos don't think like him. The whole guilt church thing stopped 20 years ago.

 Good point again and i don't mean to be argumentative for the sake of it but it is a subject that interests me. I have kids in UK daughter 26 and son 25 and i visited them in their Uni years. I was actually surprised how strong the traditionally (relationship type values) amongst them and their friend circle still were. Plus of course a big dose of 'feminism' on top. It is not just the church i am pretty sure schools still did religious ceremonies when my kids were young and the UK Government still pushes the institution of marriage despite its high failure rate. Quite why this (in my observations still exists)  again surprises me as up to 50% of kids in their 20's may have watched a bitter separation of their parents.

 

I reckon many of us older guys (TBL included) who have been through painful relationships and divorces and ended up in Thailand are more likely to have thrown aside the indoctrinations than our offspring. We know people are not their true selves on the Internet.

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21 minutes ago, Gruff said:

 Good point again and i don't mean to be argumentative for the sake of it but it is a subject that interests me. I have kids in UK daughter 26 and son 25 and i visited them in their Uni years. I was actually surprised how strong the traditionally (relationship type values) amongst them and their friend circle still were. Plus of course a big dose of 'feminism' on top. It is not just the church i am pretty sure schools still did religious ceremonies when my kids were young and the UK Government still pushes the institution of marriage despite its high failure rate. Quite why this (in my observations still exists)  again surprises me as up to 50% of kids in their 20's may have watched a bitter separation of their parents.

 

I reckon many of us older guys (TBL included) who have been through painful relationships and divorces and ended up in Thailand are more likely to have thrown aside the indoctrinations than our offspring. We know people are not their true selves on the Internet.

I was maybe 10 times in church in my whole life. My parents were not religious and I was never religious and if someone would have asked me in my home country if I see myself influenced by the church I would have said no. But that was incorrect. After moving to Thailand over 20 years ago I realized more and more how much the thinking of the church (ten commandments, etc.) is ingrained in many of us. Probably this is less in the younger generation but I am sure there is still a lot of unseen and unnoticed influence which basically comes from Christianity.

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5 hours ago, Justfine said:

For 500 days in a row? Yeah sure.

I lived with a very pretty Thai hooker for the first year I was out here.

She wanted to do it five times a day, every day, wasn't bothered if it was the same guy or not.

She almost killed me, I ran away in the end, couldn't cope with the constant demands.

She claimed to have been like that all her adult life (she was 34 years old when I left).

 

Don't know about 500 days in a row, I only lasted 300 days, and even then I had started pretending 'headaches'.

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4 minutes ago, MaeJoMTB said:

I lived with a very pretty Thai hooker for the first year I was out here.

She wanted to do it five times a day, every day, wasn't bothered if it was the same guy or not.

She almost killed me, I ran away in the end, couldn't cope with the constant demands.

She claimed to have been like that all her adult life (she was 34 years old when I left).

Don't know about 500 days in a row, I only lasted 300 days, and even then I had started pretending 'headaches'.

You talking about you having sex again ?

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On 1/20/2018 at 4:12 PM, thaibeachlovers said:

My western partner .......... However while she was apparently a normal, well adjusted woman with a positive attitude toward men, in fact she was a black hearted b1tch from the bowels of hell.

Otherwise, I've met prostitutes that were quite lovely and well balanced human beings.

#Metoo

Every Thai hooker I've slept with was nicer than my English schoolteacher wife ........... seems incredible that I endured her for nearly 30 years.

And yet she was also apparently a normal, well adjusted woman with a positive attitude toward men.

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