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Goodwill Jones

Farang and Thai woman with two teens. Marry?

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Would like to know if anyone has had experience with marrying a Thai with two

Teenage children, one boy 15yrs old going to trade school and a daughter 13

Living with dad? (I don’t understand that) she has good job.  Feedback is much appreciated.

I have raised one boy of my own and one stepson. They are both doing fine.  

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You must love her a lot to even think about marrying her under these conditions.

Sounds like expensive stress to me.

Good luck, you will need it.

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Why marry?

Just do a village wedding.

 

The boys are always a big problem, they know what you do with mum, and they don't like it.

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Mrs.Trans kids are now 22 and 28, yes l did have issues with them in the early days that were a worry, but thankfully all worked out fine.

It is just the luck of the draw as I know folk with mega problems...

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As someone that had a partner with 2 teenage kids ( when I left them ), unless they both live elsewhere, RUN.

My Thai wife didn't have her own kids, but her ratbag nephew decided to make our home his own, and never did anything to contribute, except leave a mess for us to clean up ( her when I refused to do so anymore ).

 

You will never have a life where it's just you and her.

You will always come after her own children .

Is that what you really want?

You will also come after her family, her friends, her friend's children, her countrymen, the pet hamster and the soi dogs, but that is normal for most farang husbands.

 

 

If you do go ahead, make sure you're never in a position with the daughter where you could be compromised ie, never be in a room with just the 2 of you and the door closed. I'm sure I don't have to explain that.

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Gentleman, I would like to thank each and every one of you for the insight. It is much appreciated. It was at times very hard to raise two teen boys in the states, track and martial arts was a saving grace for me. (They were busy busy) Both are doing great. Thailand I have no clue?

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7 minutes ago, Goodwill Jones said:

Gentleman, I would like to thank each and every one of you for the insight. It is much appreciated. It was at times very hard to raise two teen boys in the states, track and martial arts was a saving grace for me. (They were busy busy) Both are doing great. Thailand I have no clue?

None of your experience in the US will be of any use in LOS, whatsoever.

Women are hard to understand in your own culture and impossible here.

The entire family dynamic is different from anything you knew before.

We are as lambs to the slaughter in LOS, IMO.

 

I had decades of experience with Thai women and still got it wrong.

Feel lucky?

 

If I have any recommendations, it would be to make no commitments at all, till you know her a lot longer, like 4 or 5 years.

If you really want to be together, as MaeJo says, have a village wedding. That's a wonderful Thai institution, which means she gets to be married to the farang, but your life isn't over if it all goes wrong.

Definitely don't have a baby with her, unless willing to be an ATM for life.

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1 hour ago, thaibeachlovers said:

If you really want to be together, as MaeJo says, have a village wedding. That's a wonderful Thai institution, which means she gets to be married to the farang, but your life isn't over if it all goes wrong.

Definitely don't have a baby with her, unless willing to be an ATM for life.

I am no lawyer but I heard that if a Thai women can present pictures of her village wedding that is considered in a Thai court like and official marriage.

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1 minute ago, OneMoreFarang said:

I am no lawyer but I heard that if a Thai women can present pictures of her village wedding that is considered in a Thai court like and official marriage.

I was more considering the legality of the marriage in our own country. Unless I told them I lived with the woman for 2 years it isn't considered a legal union in my country.

 

I have no knowledge as to whether that applies in Thailand or not, but I can't see most being able to pursue it through the courts, and the guy could just leave Thailand if it got that serious.

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3 hours ago, thaibeachlovers said:

If you do go ahead, make sure you're never in a position with the daughter where you could be compromised ie, never be in a room with just the 2 of you and the door closed. I'm sure I don't have to explain that.

I get the idea what could happen but I am interested why you write he should never put himself into such a position. What do you think might happen?

1) the guy misbehaves

2) the girl misbehaves

3) independent of what may have happened: the mother will complain

4) independent of what may have happened: the daughter will use it against him

I would have though as long as the guy and his step daughter behave like they should there shouldn't be any problem. Or not?

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4 minutes ago, OneMoreFarang said:

I get the idea what could happen but I am interested why you write he should never put himself into such a position. What do you think might happen?

1) the guy misbehaves

2) the girl misbehaves

3) independent of what may have happened: the mother will complain

4) independent of what may have happened: the daughter will use it against him

I would have though as long as the guy and his step daughter behave like they should there shouldn't be any problem. Or not?

Lucky for me my 'acquired daughter' is 20 in a few months, well past any of that silliness.

 

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1 minute ago, OneMoreFarang said:

I get the idea what could happen but I am interested why you write he should never put himself into such a position. What do you think might happen?

1) the guy misbehaves

2) the girl misbehaves

3) independent of what may have happened: the mother will complain

4) independent of what may have happened: the daughter will use it against him

I would have though as long as the guy and his step daughter behave like they should there shouldn't be any problem. Or not?

Because the guy will never win if accused by a girl/ woman.

Imagine if he falls out with the girl ( 13 and going through that very confusing period of life ) for some silly reason, and she accuses him of molesting her. He's done, and his life is over. It'll be on his record back home as a child molester.

Safety is only in never being in a situation where an accusation can be credible.

In the west it's so bad now that even if a man looks at a girl he's accused of something bad. Part of the reason so few men go teaching now.

 

In my last job I had to be very careful not to ever be in a room with adult women with the door closed, as it's a mad world now. Only approved staff were allowed to be with children, and even they were banned from giving them a cuddle after surgery because of the possibility of being accused of something by parents.

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So the kids will not live with you?

Have you met them? What are your initial impressions and how much do you know about them?

 

 

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