Jump to content
BANGKOK

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

Pilotman

Expats who want to leave, if they could

Recommended Posts

On 7/21/2018 at 9:38 AM, Weasel100 said:

All of this discussion I think has been useful and I've followed it for the past day since I appear to have kicked off a lot of it with my long and hopefully not uninteresting post yesterday morning about my experiences in Thailand since I moved here nearly seven years ago.
What it all comes down to is that some falangs appear to be very happy living in Thailand while others, like me, have a hard time here but just IN SOME WAYS.
Most of my problem is with the attitudes that most Thais appear to have to life and money and basic honesty. Their religion, like most other religions, teaches them good ways to live a life and five basic things that they should not do:

  • harming living things.
  • taking what is not given.
  • sexual misconduct.
  • lying or gossip.
  • taking intoxicating substances eg drugs or drink.

I may be wrong but I suspect that something around 80 to 90 per cent of Thais would, if asked, claim to be good Buddhists. If I am right, this to me illustrates huge hypocrisy as I believe that probably 80 per cent of Thais routinely lie and gossip, 50 per cent take intoxicating substances such as alcohol, tobacco and illicit drugs, most Thai males at least could be said to lead sexually dissolute lives and a significant percentage of Thais appear to have no trouble with taking money improperly through scams and dishonest business dealings. The only one of the five basic tenets that, to me, appears to be observed by a large proportion of Thais appears to be that dealing with not harming living things. But, even there, there are problems.
A few years ago, a falang friend near where I live had a dog that developed a nasty and obviously cancerous tumour on its side. It had been confirmed to be malignant. The tumour grew to such an extent that it ruptured one morning so I loaded the dog and my falang friend into my car and drove to a Veterinary Teaching Hospital near where we live. They recommended treatment despite the fact that the dog was clearly suffering and was about to die. Not even the staff at a Veterinary Hospital were prepared to do what was necessary and put the poor dog out of its terrible distress. And no, this was not a case for treatment; it was a case for euthenasia. So, that's where the one tenet of the Buddhist religion which appears to be followed by most Thais can also cause a bad result.
And, please, I am well aware that quite possibly the majority of professed Christians don't follow the good things that whatever their brand of Christianity demands or recommends. There is hypocrisy everywhere.

But, my friends, here's the difference. In Western countries, dishonest people who go into business are not allowed to deal with their clients dishonestly or, if they do, they will find themselves in trouble with Police and Government regulatory agencies that do actually give a shit about shady businesses and prosecute them when they're found. There is little if any protection at all for people in Thailand who find that they've been ripped off by Thais as happens so very often here in my view. The Police are corrupt and useless and no Government agency wants to get involved in such things particularly when there's money to be made through back-handers.

I MUST STRESS that these are simply my observations of Thais and Thai society after having lived in Thailand for close to seven years. If others have had different experiences and do not agree with anything I've said, then that's great and fine. Everyone is entitled to an opinion so please don't seek to deny me mine.
I confess that I am a loner by nature; I always have been, even as a small boy. I cope with the problems that I have living in Thailand by keeping very much to myself. I see my one local falang friend for a few hours every week or ten days but otherwise I spend the great majority of my time at home alone.

I have plenty to keep me amused with a very large collection of DVDs and Blu-rays (I don't have TV service because I don't want any possibility of getting Thai TV shit in my house), and I have books and musical instruments that I fiddle about with.

This may sound like a pretty sad sort of life to many others but it works for me so that's all that really matters. It's fine for me and for my Thai wife whom I love to bits and who I'm quite sure loves me too (and not just the money that I have).
Am I (un)happy in Thailand. No, not really.  It's just that there are so many ways in which Thailand could be much better if it really wanted to be.

for you my friend, it's a simple toss-up. Each place has good and bad things. For us, it's Melbourne vs Chiang Mai. There are many points for CM, such as as 3 rai of land/gardens, 400sqm paid off house, rice fields all around and quiet, lots of peace and quiet. The negatives are education - I don't trust Thai schools nor education standards. Western ones, not sure you get value for money for the crazy fees. So with 3 kids, Melbourne wins out. Kids go to one of the top primary schools in the state, government run so it's free. But traffic is bad, house prices expensive, cost of living high, too many people overall the government keeps pushing migration, the city infrastructure can't take it. Public transport overcrowded, racial tensions flaring up, some suburbs are no-go, lots of African violence. Definitely lots of negatives in Melbourne. But food that I like is cheaper (sushi, smoked salmon, avocados), less chance of dying on the road by being cutoff, you can walk on footpaths, and you get 4 seasons not always hot and sweaty. And kids get a great free education and lots of after-school activities, which here are seriously lacking. So it's a toss-up, it's life. Melbourne wins for us. CM is 1-2 months every year for a holiday.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

And you my friend have found a happy balance that works for you and your family. Good luck to you. Many others like me took the plunge to live full time in Thailand and now, to some extent or other, many of us regret having done so.
You speak of racial tensions mounting back in Australia due to immigration. I expect that will just continue to get worse over the coming years. However, Australia has been and will probably continue to be much better protected by successive Governments because of Australia's policy not to allow unfettered  immigration as has happened across much of Europe in the last 20 odd years.
Many countries in Europe are in serious trouble and have a very bleak future due to their having opened their doors to immigrants who commonly either do not value or respect Western society or will actively seek to destroy it.
Back to you and your family though. Glad you're happy with your Thailand/Australia compromise life.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

One thing for sure. Being a westerner and having and raising children in Thailand always comes to a cross road and most move back for their children's future.  I know half a dozen that gave up a beautiful home, relaxing life and no debt to exit back for children and basically start all over.  If young its OK but older is not an ideal plan.  

 

As for religion.....All of it's a farce IMHO.  People use it when it suits them at a certain time and lean on it when something bad happens but following it and living by it. Forget it. People always put so much emphasis on Thais Buddhism.  Just let it be what it is. It's the same in every country. Look at Catholics and Christian's etc

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
On 7/21/2018 at 12:54 PM, Weasel100 said:

Better now??

It needed to be said because this thread invited failures and losers to contribute more so than other threads. Some positive input is required.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
On 7/17/2018 at 10:21 AM, impulse said:

 

That's an appealing thought, right up until there's something that can't be solved in Thailand with the funds available.  Sure, the base needs and impulses can be met quite handily with enough cash.  But not all needs, and cash doesn't always last as long as retirement.

 

What about missing family left behind, or the realization that it is tough to build a functional support network while surrounded mostly by fellow expats feeding their base desires for sex and booze, and locals whose economic reality has them looking at us like cash cows?

 

And there's no safety net for many guys who, through poor planning, bad luck, or scheming wives, lose their money.  At least back home, there's always a way to bring in a few bucks without having to keep your head down so you're not grassed up for WP violations, or for pursuing forbidden occupations.

 

I'm in the process of repatriating after working for around 7 years in Thailand.  I may be back.  But in the meantime, I'm going to see how it is back home, re-introduce myself to family I haven't seen in many years, work a few more years while I can, and then decide where to retire. 

 

I count my Thailand adventure as a positive in my life.  But I miss a lot of things back home that aren't available in Thailand at any price.  Maybe I won't like it back in Texas.  But I liked it there fine before I moved to Asia for the paycheck.

I will takes yours one by one:

  • Preparation and Investment to ensure you can life better in retirement than you did while working, otherwise, why bother
  • Family in home country, I have offered each of them round trip tickets and a free 10 days in Thailand, not one has ever taken me up on it.  The offer still stands.
  • 'All my rowdy friends have settled down' as the song goes, but I am sure if I was to meet my maker, they will have a party on the Credit card I leave behind with Pin number on the back.  Thats why I surround myself with drinking, carousing friends.  and I am sure they will assist my family in any way they can - for the price of a few beers.
  • Worked out ll my retirement funding plans years ago, lets say, I have no problems there.
  • Good for you, been there done that, I can now travel the rest of my life in peace.  Also told them to only die in summer time, I won't go to a funeral in the winter.
  • To hedge against boredom - I have properties in three countries to visit, Thailand, Vietnam and Hawaii.  I gave up on Mainland USA years ago after a black guy on  Georgia Avenue, Washigton DC shot at my car for looking at his girlfriend........she was a fine looking gal.  Rental company didn't even blink an eye when I brought it back with a bullet hole in the trunk.   That was the last time I set foot on Mainland USA.I bought my place in Hawaii, the closest I want to get to the madness.
  •  

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
4 minutes ago, TunnelRat69 said:

I will takes yours one by one:

  • Preparation and Investment to ensure you can life better in retirement than you did while working, otherwise, why bother
  • Family in home country, I have offered each of them round trip tickets and a free 10 days in Thailand, not one has ever taken me up on it.  The offer still stands.
  • 'All my rowdy friends have settled down' as the song goes, but I am sure if I was to meet my maker, they will have a party on the Credit card I leave behind with Pin number on the back.  Thats why I surround myself with drinking, carousing friends.  and I am sure they will assist my family in any way they can - for the price of a few beers.
  • Worked out ll my retirement funding plans years ago, lets say, I have no problems there.
  • Good for you, been there done that, I can now travel the rest of my life in peace.  Also told them to only die in summer time, I won't go to a funeral in the winter.
  • To hedge against boredom - I have properties in three countries to visit, Thailand, Vietnam and Hawaii.  I gave up on Mainland USA years ago after a black guy on  Georgia Avenue, Washigton DC shot at my car for looking at his girlfriend........she was a fine looking gal.  Rental company didn't even blink an eye when I brought it back with a bullet hole in the trunk.   That was the last time I set foot on Mainland USA.I bought my place in Hawaii, the closest I want to get to the madness.
  •  

 

The difference between you and me (and a lot of the guys on here) is that I liked it fine back home.  I liked it fine in Thailand.  I could live quite contentedly in either place.

 

Which says a lot more about me than it says about "back home" or Thailand.  It's not as if bad things don't happen to some percentage of the people living in both places...

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
On 7/20/2018 at 4:33 AM, Weasel100 said:

Well, for a start I have to say that I do have a lot of sympathy with many of the comments above about the disappointment that often seems to overtake our dreams of a new life in Thailand. To that extent, I am glad that I'm far from being alone in my own disappointment.

Before I moved to Thailand just shy of seven years ago, I had been to this country on holiday some 13 times I think. I thought at the time I moved that I knew the Thai people quite well. I had found them friendly and mostly helpful when I was on holiday here but soon after I moved here and bought a house, I came to see the Thais for what I believe they generally are. It is possible I believe to point to a national character, some characteristic or characteristics which, generally speaking, the people of a particular country most often exhibit to some extent or other. The Germans I believe have a well deserved reputation for brusqueness if not outright rudeness, the French for being haughty and stand-offish, Australians for being a bit crude. You get the picture.


Since I moved to Thailand, I have frequently been deceived and misled. Thais have told me bare-faced lies on many occasions and I have been ripped off more times than I care to remember. This lying, deception and misleading is always related to money and it is therefore my conclusion that the very, very great majority of Thais are interested in only three things in life - money, money and money and that they really don't care how they get it, especially from all of us rich falangs. And we are in their eyes all rich and ripe for f*cking over.


Of course there are people in our home countries (I'm from Australia) who rip people off but I would suggest that where the number of liars and shysters in Australia may be say 5 per cent, the percentage would probably be closer to 80 per cent of Thais who are happy to lie to and deceive falangs to get money out of them.


Thankfully, my Thai wife is one of what I believe are the remaining 20 per cent of honest and decent Thais. We genuinely love each other very much but, even in our relationship, there is no question that what I can do to help my wife and her family financially is a part of the success of our relationship.

From time to time, when Thais try to rip me off or when they lie to me and try to deceive me to get money out of me, I get incredibly angry and start ranting about how I wish I could go back to Australia for what was, at least in some ways, the better life that I had there. But, I am emotionally committed to my lovely wife and heavily committed financially in Thailand so it is not a realistic option for me to return to Australia to live on a pension which would go nowhere near as far there as it does in Thailand.


My disappointment with Thailand is manifold. Things that are taken for granted in Australia and much of the rest of the Western world simply don’t happen in Thailand or are simply given lip service here. These things that are taken so much for granted in the Western world include:


1  consumer protection laws – they exist in Thailand I believe but few retailers know about them so that when we wish to return or exchange an item bought even from some well known retailers, we often have to have an unnecessary argument and are often told that it’s not possible
2  driver safety – Thailand is generally agreed to be the most dangerous country in the world in which to drive. Driver training and enforcement of speeding laws are practically non-existent and enforcement of drink driving and traffic laws is generally subject to bribery and corruption. The effect of this is millions of lethally dangerous drivers on Thai roads. They are often drunk, under the influence of other drugs, they drive way too fast and way too close to other vehicles and they have neither the knowledge or the desire to drive safely or responsibly
3  occupational health and safety laws exist in Thailand but, again, they rarely appear to be enforced. Hard hats are generally worn on building sites but other forms of safety protection such as ear muffs, welders’ masks and proper safety footwear rarely appear to be used. Again, it’s all a matter of lip service with no real desire to protect workers.


Let me ask you a question. How many others out there have travelled in other countries in Asia and SE Asia in the past few years? I have been to Indonesia, Vietnam, Malaysia, Burma, South Korea, Mongolia, Hong Kong and Macao (China of course) and Cambodia. Thailand is way behind many (or possibly all) of those countries in its acceptance of Western values and practices and will, in my opinion, remain much closer to the Third world than to the West unless it begins to take actions very soon such as have been taken in South Korea and Malaysia in particular. Thailand has a lot of potential but it needs to accept that Western ways, while not always the best ways, are most often better if it is to progress with the rest of SE Asia and not get left behind as has been happening here for a long time.


The greatest thing that Thailand could do to improve its chances of a prosperous future is to start taking English language training seriously. I would suggest that fewer than 10 per cent of Thais have anything more than a couple of words or phrases of English. My wife tells me that Thais are taught English in school but you’d really never know it. She also tells me that Thais generally don’t like to speak English because they’re “shy”. The whole world knows (except possibly Thailand) that English truly is the international language these days and that a knowledge of English and an ability to speak it reasonably well is the single most important thing that any country can do to assist its economic growth and its place in the world.


I wish I could be more positive about this country where I came to settle some seven years ago but there is so much that just drives me mad here that it has unfortunately detracted greatly from my enjoyment of life in Thailand.


And before anyone tells to me that I should just ***k off back to Australia if I’m unhappy here, please be honest and say that you have not had similar experiences with Thais and with Thailand which probably also at least annoy you and occasionally make you think of your former lives at “home”.

Hmmmm  I did get ripped off for nine baht in a 7/11 one night.  Your statements on the surrounding countries being way ahead of Thailand accepting Western Ways??  Rubbish. Mongolia??  Ulanbataar is still stuck in the Soviet Nineties.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
1 hour ago, TunnelRat69 said:

Hmmmm  I did get ripped off for nine baht in a 7/11 one night.  Your statements on the surrounding countries being way ahead of Thailand accepting Western Ways??  Rubbish. Mongolia??  Ulanbataar is still stuck in the Soviet Nineties.

It would be handy if people bothered to read posts properly before denigrating those who have taken the time to post thorough impressions of life in Thailand compared to life in other countries in this region. I didn't say all the countries in the region were ahead of Thailand. I singled out South Korea and Malaysia if you'd bothered to read.
Been to UB recently? It's becoming Western very quickly and I predict that Mongolia will certainly overtake Thailand in the next ten years.

You can disagree. That's fine

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
3 hours ago, TunnelRat69 said:

I will takes yours one by one:

  • Preparation and Investment to ensure you can life better in retirement than you did while working, otherwise, why bother
  • Family in home country, I have offered each of them round trip tickets and a free 10 days in Thailand, not one has ever taken me up on it.  The offer still stands.
  • 'All my rowdy friends have settled down' as the song goes, but I am sure if I was to meet my maker, they will have a party on the Credit card I leave behind with Pin number on the back.  Thats why I surround myself with drinking, carousing friends.  and I am sure they will assist my family in any way they can - for the price of a few beers.
  • Worked out ll my retirement funding plans years ago, lets say, I have no problems there.
  • Good for you, been there done that, I can now travel the rest of my life in peace.  Also told them to only die in summer time, I won't go to a funeral in the winter.
  • To hedge against boredom - I have properties in three countries to visit, Thailand, Vietnam and Hawaii.  I gave up on Mainland USA years ago after a black guy on  Georgia Avenue, Washigton DC shot at my car for looking at his girlfriend........she was a fine looking gal.  Rental company didn't even blink an eye when I brought it back with a bullet hole in the trunk.   That was the last time I set foot on Mainland USA.I bought my place in Hawaii, the closest I want to get to the madness.
  •  

 Black guys shootin at your car is so much worse than white guys doin it. thanks for pointing out his skin colour. It helps me to understand why you feel the way you do.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
On 7/17/2018 at 4:36 PM, Maradona 10 said:

I have always believed that all of us given the choice would rather have a great life back in one's own land, if money was no object and had family etc.

 

What person in their own country who had everything a man needed and was happy with his lot woke up one morning and thought 'I think I'll move to Thailand'?

Many of us did.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
3 minutes ago, Maradona 10 said:

One could hang himself reading this thread. What a cluste*ck.

555. Yes there is another similar thread running that invites negativity and criticism of Thailand.

 

16 hours ago, AYJAYDEE said:

 Black guys shootin at your car is so much worse than white guys doin it. thanks for pointing out his skin colour. It helps me to understand why you feel the way you do.

Crime is not colour blind.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I love Thailand and my Thai partner of many years. My partner says she will go with me were ever I am happy which in a push would be New Zealand and we all know that N.Z. rocks in many ways.

 

Yet after 15 years here with every thing I need.  A home on one rai  fully fence with 3 dog and 9 cats and close to all the shopping  I would need along with a hospital.

 

A good pension and a home in NZ.

 

I still prefer Thailand as long as the air con when needed works ? 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
On 7/18/2018 at 11:23 AM, possum1931 said:

Thailand has it's drawbacks, such as unnecessary immigration hoop jumping, but amongst ordinary Thai people, dishonesty and greed are very much in the minority.

Foreigners who do not live out in the countryside  ( yes, those small boring villages where they would go crazy)...........do not understand your statement.    I think the  TV members who have settled outside of

the cities will mostly agree (unless they inherited the wrong inlaws)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
On 7/17/2018 at 10:36 AM, Maradona 10 said:

I have always believed that all of us given the choice would rather have a great life back in one's own land, if money was no object and had family etc.

 

What person in their own country who had everything a man needed and was happy with his lot woke up one morning and thought 'I think I'll move to Thailand'?

Money can't buy weather 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    No registered users viewing this page.

×
×
  • Create New...