Worst Joke Ever 2019

[WorriedNoodle 7,077]

[WorriedNoodle 7,077]

[WorriedNoodle 7,077]

[WorriedNoodle 7,077]

[GBW 550]

Knock knock

 

Who's there ?

 

GRANDAD !!

 

Quick, stop the cremation !!!!!!!!!!

[billd766 26,267]

13 hours ago, tifino said:

and the joke is on us!  

 

go to Google

 

Input any random three digit number, followed by 'new cases' 

 

random example:    '234 new cases' 

 

 

be amazed this is where media is putting up scare numbers to suit your curiosity 

I just put 345 new cases and got hits on Romania, Dallas County, Iowa, Belgrade, Orange County, Kyrgystan and many more.

 

https://www.google.co.uk/search?sxsrf=ALeKk00DXAHI0p53SvFbqxOdYH2M3CoC-A%3A1596341286710&source=hp&ei=JjwmX-TFKeSa4-EPjqCpgA0&q=345+new+cases&oq=345+new+cases&gs_lcp=CgZwc3ktYWIQDDIFCAAQxAIyAggAMggIABAWEAoQHjoECCMQJzoFCAAQkQI6CwguELEDEMcBEKMCOgUILhCxAzoFCAAQsQM6CAgAELEDEIMBOg4ILhCxAxCDARDHARCvAToICC4QxwEQowI6DgguEMcBEK8BEJECEJMCOggILhDHARCvAToGCAAQFhAeUPpIWKt8YNqiAWgAcAB4AIABtAGIAcQLkgEDNy42mAEAoAEBqgEHZ3dzLXdpeg&sclient=psy-ab&ved=0ahUKEwjk8NTa0vvqAhVkzTgGHQ5QCtAQ4dUDCAc

 

About 567,000,000 results (0.40 seconds) 

[Skallywag 4,279]

[Skallywag 4,279]

[tifino 8,449]

and have you seen the latest movie out? It is called 'Constipation'

 

 

 

umm... no, what's it about?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

dunno, it hasn't come out yet

[tifino 8,449]

lazy furniture

 

 

[tifino 8,449]

getting it started...

 

A ship engine failed and no one could fix it, so they brought in a guy with 40 years experience.

He inspected the engine very carefully, top to bottom.

After looking things over, the guy reached into his bag and pulled out a small hammer.

He gently tapped something. Instantly, the engine burst back into life.

The engine was fixed!

7 Days later the owners got his bill for $10,000.

"What?!" the owners said. "You hardly did anything. Send us an itemised bill."

The reply simply said:
Tapping with a hammer: $2
Knowing where to tap: $9,998

Don't ever underestimate experience.

 

 

 

[tifino 8,449]

I feel good...

 

 

 

[Davo369 2,064]

[tifino 8,449]

booty adverts

hey... anybody else getting screens full of this!

 

 Not being able to see a normal scree has been a bad joke within itself...

 

 - not that I am complaining...  

Edited August 2, 2020 by tifino

[ballpoint 15,820]

I'm reading a biography on Paul McCartney.  Did you know that when he was married to Heather Mills he once gave her a plane for her birthday?

And a jar of moisturiser for the other leg.