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Worst Joke Ever 2024


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Paddy is on a nude beach in Spain. 
Out of manners and to prevent sunburn, he keeps a hat over his privates. 
A woman walked past sniggering and says, If you were a gentleman you'd lift your hat'. 

Paddy replies,

 

'If you weren’t such an ugly wart faced old slag it would lift itself!'

Edited by scottiejohn
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Two Irishmen Paddy and Mick are having a drink and watching the football around Mick's house. At full time Paddy gets up to go home but notices it is p8ssing down with rain outside.
"Stay the night here Paddy," says Mick. "I'll go and make up a bed for you."
When Mick comes back down the stairs Paddy is standing there drenched to the bone.
Mick says, "What the bleeding hell happened to you?"


Paddy replies, "I went home for me pyjamas."
 
 

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Two men were arrested for masturbating in my local newsagents...
It was all over the papers.
 
Just been in hospital having a large mole removed from my penis.
Won't be sh*gging one of those again!
 
I went to the doctor and he told me "Don't eat anything fatty."
I asked: "What like - pizzas or burgers?"
He replied: "No. Just don't eat anything you fat b*stasrd."
 

I nearly got fired from my job as a roofer for masturbating but my boss let me wipe the slate clean !!
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