Alternatives to AA?

[MrPatrickThai]

I'm an alcoholic and got sober using the 12 steps of AA nearly 30 years ago in Thailand.

Now, I'm getting pretty tired of AA, perhaps due to where I live having few meetings and the ones they have seem to be full of people that are there just for the friendship.

So, I'm thinking of quitting AA and looking for an alternative to keeping me sober. 

Is it possible? I may have been brainwashed but have been told it isn't, and always believed that, until recently.

Has anyone here ever found a solution that is as good as AA?

How does one leave AA? I know there are requirements for membership, that are often ignored, but are there any requirements for leaving?

 

 

[MalandLee]

Fellowship online - https://aa.org.au/meetings/online-aa-meetings/

30 years - you may be able to help lot's out there - that will keep you sober.

No join or leave requirement other than being an alcoholic.

 

BTW I am 22yrs 7 months 22 days sober - 1 day at a time - No meeting for past 20+  years. But I began online and remain online.

[Neeranam]

I know many who have basically left AA, never going to meetings, but still call themselves a member.

 

Have you thought about the Hare Krishna movement? 

[cooked]

Some people get quite agitated when you suggest that there are alternatives to AA. My personal story is of little interest but I managed to get off the juice after many years of heavy drinking when I looked around at my new family here in Thailand and saw how much depended on my staying alive for a few more years yet.

Knowing that you ought to stop and actually stopping are two different things. Getting there must be different from individual to individual. I just stopped completely for more than a year, now I occasionally take a small beer 3 - 4 times a week. 

Good luck mate, take your own advice.

[Wilson Smith]

Well meetings may or may not having anything to do with AA. When the book was publish there was no such thing as an AA meeting. Yes there were nearly 100 people in 3 cities attending meetings that were not called AA. So when someone inquired about the book to learn how to stop drinking and get "recovered", they were instructed to do the first 11 steps and then go to into the their community to find someone who needed and wanted help. They were advised to go to hospitals and other places to find these drunks. Oh they did this because their life depended on it and the result was this became the highlight of their life. 

 

You get what you put it, and you have been bitching about AA for years and the result is your happiness. Its what you give not what you take. How about putting on "a new pair of glasses"

[ding]

I am researching retirement locations in Thailand recently.

My 1st criteria is good AA meetings.

All else is bound to burn if I drink, so it's prime.

 

I hear ya OP. AA has changed in the states - maybe around the world. But I always like going to Thai AA because it's not treatment center tainted. "Slipping is part of recovery" my arse. It may be part of a sound business plan if you're a treatment center needing return customers. New AAers don't want to hear what this boring 33 yr old timer has to say in recent years... different dynamic in the US.

 

So I rarely speak in AA anymore stateside, but always pipe right up in Thailand. I used to speak 7x/week in AA. Now I go several years only listening 99% of the time. I really don't have what they want. But I do have what I always wanted; a stable serene life in a loving marriage. I'm able to be a worker among workers and feel satisfied and content with what I've got.

[likerdup1]

On 1/15/2019 at 11:49 AM, Wilson Smith said:

Well meetings may or may not having anything to do with AA. When the book was publish there was no such thing as an AA meeting. Yes there were nearly 100 people in 3 cities attending meetings that were not called AA. So when someone inquired about the book to learn how to stop drinking and get "recovered", they were instructed to do the first 11 steps and then go to into the their community to find someone who needed and wanted help. They were advised to go to hospitals and other places to find these drunks. Oh they did this because their life depended on it and the result was this became the highlight of their life. 

 

You get what you put it, and you have been bitching about AA for years and the result is your happiness. Its what you give not what you take. How about putting on "a new pair of glasses"

I won't ever quit the program of AA ( doing the steps ) but I have quit many meetings especially in and around Thailand because the meetings are just as you describe. The "Friends who don't drink get together and talk about whatever and sometimes not drinking" Fellowship. Too many meetings like that and frankly they call themselves AA but only a few people are really doing the program. They are just meeting makers and some of them may not even be alcoholics ( I actually know this to be true in a couple cases) Just hard drinkers who found friendship in AA .... this is actually very bad for real alcoholics who show up looking for help because many in these "meeting maker" meetings are NOT talking about how to recover by doing the 12 steps of AA.

 

Because of this I have started my own online meeting with Big Book enthusiasts who understand that to recover we have to practice the steps daily. (MESSAGE ME IF YOU WANT TO MEET WITH US) I don't wish to hang out with guys 30 years sober who have never worked the steps... yes there is a guy in AA around here that said that in a meeting not too long ago.  That guy doesn't have my problem. I could not go for anymore than 6 months using just only meetings. I finally had to do the steps with a sponsor ... then I got recovery.

 

So you don't have to quit AA. Just quit the meetings but still do 12 step work  ... hell if you are in Pattaya .. go out to some bars in the morning and sit down next to an akly who is putting his first drink down... The big book says to start of by just being friendly... then take it from there... you might have your self a sponsee if you do a good job at using the instructions outlined in "working with others' chapter.

 

[Neeranam]

On 2/21/2019 at 12:41 AM, likerdup1 said:

I don't wish to hang out with guys 30 years sober who have never worked the steps... yes there is a guy in AA around here that said that in a meeting not too long ago

I went to meetings in Pattaya where the chairperson said you only have to do steps 1 and 12.

I was speaking to an old guy that many look up to and he told me he had never done a step 5. Unbelievable.

[Neeranam]

On 2/21/2019 at 12:41 AM, likerdup1 said:

( I actually know this to be true in a couple cases) Just hard drinkers who found friendship in AA .... this is actually very bad for real alcoholics who show up looking for help because many in these "meeting maker" meetings are NOT talking about how to recover by doing the 12 steps of AA.

Amen. 

 

 

[ding]

How did it go MrPatrickThai?

 

I felt the sobriety in Chiang Mai was good. Funny that I never made it to the McCormick Hospital location years ago.

 

I like Bangkok meetings too.

 

AA in Thailand is less treatment center oriented and more like what AA was like when I sobered up in

 

 

[MrPatrickThai]

On 3/21/2019 at 11:18 AM, ding said:

How did it go MrPatrickThai?

 

I felt the sobriety in Chiang Mai was good. Funny that I never made it to the McCormick Hospital location years ago.

 

I like Bangkok meetings too.

 

AA in Thailand is less treatment center oriented and more like what AA was like when I sobered up in

 

 

Hi Ding, I've left religious cults before, so I understand the process that is going on in my head. 

I still try to help alcoholics by volunteering at a local psychiatric hospital, this keeps me out of my own head. I still do things similar to AA steps 1,3,10,11,12. This is essential.

 

So far things are going great! That was a good meeting in the hospital in Chiang Mai, apart from one arrogant oldtimer thinking he more important than others. 

 

Aa in Thailand is 95% in treatment centres, apart from the foreign meetings.

 

 

 

[MrPatrickThai]

On 2/21/2019 at 12:41 AM, likerdup1 said:

So you don't have to quit AA. Just quit the meetings but still do 12 step work  ... hell if you are in Pattaya .. go out to some bars in the morning and sit down next to an akly who is putting his first drink down... The big book says to start of by just being friendly... then take it from there... you might have your self a sponsee if you do a good job at using the instructions outlined in "working with others' chapter

Great advice!

 

That's kinda what I'm doing. I prefer to focus on the homeless guys, and those in the local loony bin, being a low-bottom drunk myself. 

[Don Chance]

 

https://baclofentreatment.com/

[Neeranam]

On 4/9/2019 at 9:21 AM, Don Chance said:

 

https://baclofentreatment.com/

Baclofen is the generic name of muscle relaxant medications Gablofen and Lioresal. ... This can backfire, however, as baclofen has its own abuse potential. Producing a sensation similar to the euphoria felt from being drunk, baclofen can be addictive, especially when the drug is mixed with opioids, alcohol or amphetamines.

[Don Chance]

21 hours ago, Neeranam said:

Baclofen is the generic name of muscle relaxant medications Gablofen and Lioresal. ... This can backfire, however, as baclofen has its own abuse potential. Producing a sensation similar to the euphoria felt from being drunk, baclofen can be addictive, especially when the drug is mixed with opioids, alcohol or amphetamines.

Why don't read the web site instead of making up stuff?

[Neeranam]

On 4/21/2019 at 9:44 AM, Don Chance said:

Why don't read the web site instead of making up stuff?

I didn't make this up, it's from wikipedia.

[Don Chance]

On 4/22/2019 at 9:31 AM, Neeranam said:

I didn't make this up, it's from wikipedia.

Maybe out of context.  Addiction to baclofen is a better than being addicted to alcohol because there are hardly any side effects. It's the lesser of evils. It is a cure as long as you keep taking it, but after a few years people may give up the baclofen too if they have been de-socialized from alcohol.

It take a years for an alcoholics liver to recover.

[mikey88]

If anyone’s 30 years ‘sober’ and in the fellowship, surely they know that leaving is an entirely personal matter. You just stop going, relinquish any sponsee and chuff them off to someone else and do other things.

Finding those other things can be a problem..

Personally I never say never. I’ve seen too many go down the gurgler thinking they were fine..

[Wongkitlo]

My Thai brother in law was a raging fall over drunk every night alcoholic. He went and became a monk and is still in the temple three years later. I think it is what Thais do to overcome their substance issues.

Sent from my SM-J730F using Thailand Forum - Thaivisa mobile app

[likerdup1]

On 6/15/2019 at 11:11 AM, mikey88 said:

If anyone’s 30 years ‘sober’ and in the fellowship, surely they know that leaving is an entirely personal matter. You just stop going, relinquish any sponsee and chuff them off to someone else and do other things.

Finding those other things can be a problem..

Personally I never say never. I’ve seen too many go down the gurgler thinking they were fine..

There is a common misconception that people "leave AA". Nobody "leaves" the AA program. They stop going to meetings and/or stop putting the steps in their life. If they are real alcoholics this usually leads to a relapse because they turn their backs and stop following one of the main precepts of AA - to pass the AA message of recovery on to new people. This is the 12th step and the most important. (that is if they were doing this at all to begin with) which I have seen before.

 

There are so called alcoholics with over 30 years that go to Thailand meetings but don't do the steps and only go to meetings. Usually these are people who were only problem drinkers and not real alcoholics. They just like the meetings for the fellowship and stopped drinking without doing step work ... people like me who are real alcoholics have to do all the steps and continue to do them to remain sober for life.

[gerryBScot]

Hello MrPatrickThai and all ... what is important is people are not drinking one day at a time. I have to say with a few years' distance from AA Thailand I was actually quite disappointed by my experience in the fellowship there. I consider myself one of the lucky ones in getting sober in London, England and by virtue of that I was able to venture forth and get to Thailand and now China and at 61 I am still doing stuff that is amazes me.

 

Personalities are big in AA Thailand as far as I can see. I loved that meeting at the hospital in CM too but I also recall one old timer behaving as if he had seigneurial rights! I think of the newcomer in central Thailand who had a copy of an established member's personal story thrust into his hands and who subsequently received a terrible bollocking off the same member when he rolled in a few weeks later after further experimentation because he hadn't paid for the book! Not surprisingly this incident and a list of other nonsensical goings on at meetings didn't actually help our  struggling newcomer very much.

 

I often wondered how it came to pass that we lost our rooms at McCormack and at the church in Ruam Rudee in BKK. Maybe better options became available, I don't know, maybe just natural progression but I wonder if we had outstayed our welcome or whatever. The Hua Hin thing saddened me too with a big falling out a few years back resulting in in a split - I happily go to both groups when I am there but AA was never about factions, it was, is and always will be about unity.

 

I still say my prayers as learnt in AA and prioritise a strong connection with my higher power. I still have connections with AAs and I get to meetings when I can. I hope to make a few when I grab a short week's break in Thailand next month but will not be in the north. I think the spiritual life is the only alternative to AA but truth is it has to be based on AA's programme. So keep saying your prayers and giving it away.

[Neeranam]

On 9/14/2019 at 8:46 PM, gerryBScot said:

I often wondered how it came to pass that we lost our rooms at McCormack and at the church in Ruam Rudee in BKK. Maybe better options became available, I don't know, maybe just natural progression but I wonder if we had outstayed our welcome or whatever. The Hua Hin thing saddened me too with a big falling out a few years back resulting in in a split - I happily go to both groups when I am there but AA was never about factions, it was, is and always will be about unity.

I heard there was fighting in chiang mai outside the hospital.

I got sober at Ruam Rudee, so sad it's not there. Was great fellowship before and after the meeting.

Thered a new one at Ekamai. I went 30 min early to hopefully meet someone but ther chairman arrived minutes before the meeting. Several people arrived after the meeting started, some left early. No fellowship, everyone in a hurry to do something.  

Small  number and no kne wanted to stay or go for a cup of tea, sad. 20% of meeting chose not to share.

 

SLIP sobriety  losing its priority.