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Married to Thai girl, found out she's cheating while USA green card/visa is in process


mikehongpark

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50 minutes ago, colinneil said:

How many times is this same story going to keep appearing here?

Same thing but written differently, same 30 friends with confirmed flights to Thailand.

No, it’s a different story today, the other day he wasn’t married yet, but today they married 11 months ago... 🙄

I’ll really miss my Johnny Walker. 

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2 hours ago, mikehongpark said:

she gives me the gift of a child as the love for a child will change all mindsets.

hilarious............

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2 minutes ago, HighPriority said:

No, it’s a different story today, the other day he wasn’t married yet, but today they married 11 months ago... 🙄

I’ll really miss my Johnny Walker. 

I shortened the version for language help on the other topic, when I started the thread. If you see my responses on the other thread, I did clear up that I'm already married 11 months ago and having a 2nd wedding reception for my friends and family from USA. Take it as you will, but I'm just looking for advice before calling 30 friends. Need to fully think it through.

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1 minute ago, mikehongpark said:

I shortened the version for language help on the other topic, when I started the thread. If you see my responses on the other thread, I did clear up that I'm already married 11 months ago and having a 2nd wedding reception for my friends and family from USA. Take it as you will, but I'm just looking for advice before calling 30 friends. Need to fully think it through.

I read from start to finish, I don’t recall how many pages, I didn’t see any mention of being already married.

i don’t understand what you think you are getting in here... ?

You asked your question in your original thread, got the forums wisdom (which we now know to be correct) and you still don’t know what to do ? 🙄

 

I also agree with a previous poster, next time get one that’s only 10 years younger than you.

 

 

 

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It's a sad fact of life that nice guys finish last. It sounds like she has taken you for a ride due to your openness and sincerity. 

 

The golden rule whilst dating a Thai girl from any social/economic background is to let them know who's boss. If you don't stamp your authority on the relationship early on, then she will see you as a door mat and use you as she sees fit.

 

Lay down the law early on, grow a pair and show her you mean business. In your case it's already too late. DO NOT take her back. No forgiveness. She will cheat on you again and again because you did not safe guard yourself early on. 

 

Find someone else and use the above as a guide for future interactions with Thai girls.

 

KP.

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1 hour ago, cornishcarlos said:
2 hours ago, mikehongpark said:

I am 48 and she is 26 

That's where I stopped reading... She's young enough to be your daughter and also have a 4yr old kid !!

I know love works in mysterious ways, but come on.....

I agree, she is definitely too old. He should have picked an innocent 18 year old girl without kid.

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KP's post above has good advice.  If you definitely know that she has cheated on you, then I'd lay it on hard.  (That includes demanding your bottles of JW...).

 

Forget trying to break up softly - she'll only go and do the same again with another trusting guy.  

 

Since you're legally married, according to Thai law, you are also entitled to monetary compensation from the Thai guy (I assume he's Thai?) who's been f**king your wife.  I'd inform her that you are contacting a lawyer to pursue that man for damages, as well as your divorce of course.

 

Of course, make sure that you inform the relevant authorities about her Green Card application...

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1 minute ago, simon43 said:

Since you're legally married, according to Thai law

 

Is he ? I thought he says he just had a Thai wedding ceremony, no mention of registering the marriage at the Amphur.. Maybe I missed that bit though.

If not, just pack your bags and walk away, looking over your shoulder just to be safe 🙂

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Women can be extremely vengeful if a male cheats on them. Why should they be expecting to be treated differently when they are cheating themselves?

Walk away. If it's happened once, it will happen again. Guaranteed.

 

 

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On 1/6/2019 at 5:42 AM, mikehongpark said:

I am 48 and she is 26

 

In your first post regarding the facebook chat with "Zen", you conveniently forgot to add this fact.

 

You are too old. You are even to old for a mid 30 Thai woman.

 

If she is cheating on you know while you are showering her with gifts and money you are thinking about giving it a chance (probably after sleeping on it and ignoring all the advice from the previous thread). Just imagine how much she will love you true when you hit 50 and she is 28. Even better when you are 60 and she is 38. Even at 40 years she could have dozens of foreigners lined up on her chat apps while you are one foot in the grave.

 

As for your reasons and the one including that too much money has already been invested

 

On 1/6/2019 at 5:42 AM, mikehongpark said:

2) Give her a chance:

* Start working on having kids this year.

* Will take time to earn my trust.

* Relationship will be rocky for a while, at least until she gives me the gift of a child as the love for a child will change all mindsets.

 

Surely I do  think now that this is a  troll post as no one could be this dumb?

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Luckily, you found out the truth before you became even more tied up to her with kids, more debt, etc...Consider closely why you want to imprison yourself with this woman and risk your happiness, freedom and sex life.

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25 minutes ago, cornishcarlos said:

 

Is he ? I thought he says he just had a Thai wedding ceremony, no mention of registering the marriage at the Amphur.. Maybe I missed that bit though.

If not, just pack your bags and walk away, looking over your shoulder just to be safe 🙂

The marriage ceremony/reception was all legally registered at the Amphur 2/23/2018, with no one from my side in attendance as it was a decision to get the green card paperwork started. The 2nd wedding reception for my USA friends and family is scheduled next month on 2/23/2019. Basically, I was having another reception (American style) for my USA side. 

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This one is EASY.  Of course you get rid of her, BUT have your friends come to Thailand (the ones who can't cancel their tickets) and enjoy being single again.

 

When you get sick, she will cheat.  When your money gets "low," she will cheat.  If she thinks you will cheat, she will cheat.  If you think she is cheating, well, that's a nightmare.  It's always 100% over if someone cheats.  I'm sure there are more, or many more times than you think.  maybe all-day, all-night, all-day, all-night...yea, put that in your mind.  it's horrible.

 

hope you learned a good lesson.  money gone, heart broken, but it's ok.  impossible to trust her, impossible.  

 

people say thailand is cheap, but then they lose $150,000.  it's not that cheap.  lol.

 

don't be the sucker who stays with girl that cheats on you. see, lose-lose.

 

good luck.  

 

 

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Am confused - if you have been married 11 months and have not gotten her pregnant by now  ?! How is having another wedding ceremony going to expedite having a child?!?  When the kid is 16 and you are 62 - yes you will be a grandpa in some ways - just my opinion

 

 

 

 

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