Tell your wife to step up.

[Kalasin Jo]

On 2/14/2019 at 12:47 PM, Peterw42 said:

As with many threads on Thaivisa, it would be interesting to know actual numbers. How many guys have spent all their money and are now short for the 800k/65k.

 

Interested to know what percentage of expats the thread is even relevant to.

 

In my broader circle of friends and acquaintance's, maybe 40 people, maybe 1-2 of them have spent all their money and dont have the 800/65k. 

 

Well I have it, reasonably accessible, but would be hit with a massive tax bill on it as it's classified as a pension

[BritManToo]

13 minutes ago, GreasyFingers said:

I do pity all you guys that cannot love and trust their wives. Yes I know things can go tits up (3 wives back home) but the majority of my acquaintances here do not have your problems.

Can love, can never trust a woman, certainly not a wife/gf, probably not your mother/daughter either.

You're thinking 4th time lucky, sounds a bit optomistic to me?

 

[marcusarelus]

34 minutes ago, OneMoreFarang said:

It seems you like to solve an emotional problem with a logical solution.

I think the point is that many men want to be seen by their girlfriends/wives as the big spender.

They want that she thinks "he is rich" and they think she will love him long time because of that.

And to be fair, lots of girls love the guy long time as long as he is doing all he can to look rich.

 

This situation will never be solved the way you describe. Because in many (most?) cases the he wouldn't have a loving wife anymore with this logic solution...

If you can keep your head when all about you   

    Are losing theirs and blaming it on you,   

If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,

    But make allowance for their doubting too;   

If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,

    Or being lied about, don’t deal in lies,

Or being hated, don’t give way to hating,

    And yet don’t look too good, nor talk too wise:

[digger70]

On 2/14/2019 at 12:31 AM, swissie said:

OP's suggestions are not that outlandish. After the Farang has invested a few millions in property, why not take out a loan to finance Farang-Hubby's retirement visa extension if necessary?

Of course, it would show if "true-love" is present or the marriage was founded on "alternative" reasons.

A lot of True Love would go down the drain. and more then a few Farang would be pulling up stumps and move on,,,, just my opinion,,,

[GreasyFingers]

8 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

Can love, can never trust a woman, certainly not a wife/gf, probably not your mother/daughter either.

You're thinking 4th time lucky, sounds a bit optomistic to me?

 

Have always been a bit of a punter.

[baansgr]

2 hours ago, GreasyFingers said:

You are not living in Thailand. Back home what you say is correct but not here. Go and try it sometime and I will humbly apologize if it works for you.

I do live in Thailand. My ex borrowed from SCB with the property as collateral and I know Thais that have loans on their property. You are confusing mortgages with secured loans.

[GreasyFingers]

5 minutes ago, baansgr said:

I do live in Thailand. My ex borrowed from SCB with the property as collateral and I know Thais that have loans on their property. You are confusing mortgages with secured loans.

Then I apologize to you. As I said before the banks would not touch the wife, even with me as guarantor with more money in a bank than she was asking for, unless she had a wage and could produce pay slips.

[BritManToo]

2 hours ago, GreasyFingers said:

Then I apologize to you. As I said before the banks would not touch the wife, even with me as guarantor with more money in a bank than she was asking for, unless she had a wage and could produce pay slips.

 

 

No bank will give a loan on a property without a clear proof of the ability to repay.

Maybe they could ten years back but not for the last five, banking has tightened up.

[MyFriend You]

On 2/13/2019 at 7:31 AM, swissie said:

OP's suggestions are not that outlandish. After the Farang has invested a few millions in property, why not take out a loan to finance Farang-Hubby's retirement visa extension if necessary?

Of course, it would show if "true-love" is present or the marriage was founded on "alternative" reasons.

I think most wives are open to doing this, but their boyfriends (Pee-Chai) won't, how will they make payments on the car she bought him if you are using it to play for hubby's loan.

[MyFriend You]

On 2/13/2019 at 7:12 PM, NCC1701A said:

upon reflection, I think this is a great idea. It should be listed as a unofficial requirement for married Farangs. no joke.   

Do they require the Spouse to go to immigration with them to show their face and identification when he applies for an extension??  If not, they should, that would put a damper on a lot of these phony marriages, read where one old gal was married to 16 Indians @ 10K Baht each.............on a side note the spouse getting a loan without an income seems to be a no starter............but i need nor a spouse or a loan so would't have a clue.

[MyFriend You]

10 hours ago, Skallywag said:

I think it makes sense and I'm no financial wizard.  If your wife secures a loan using property, how will she pay it back if she does not have a good job.  Am sure the bank needs to know that she has personal income (a Job) so she is able to pay back the loan.   Many here have wives that do not work - so having wife get a bank loan is not possible

Ummmm  the husband pays it back.  payback on 800,000 baht can't be much per month.

[Gandtee]

To counter the naysayers. My wife's family stepped up to the mark without being asked. Not all Thai women are there for the money.

[smotherb]

On 2/14/2019 at 12:38 AM, Solinvictus said:

Nice point!

 

Ohh how much the tides would turn on allot of couples if guys did that more often, asking her to put up more especially after being generous.  I for sure ain't being 'had' in my roots here.

I am always amazed at the numbers of men who accept a wife who is only an expense and never an asset. Why do so many men do that? Is it lack of self-esteem; the thought that you can only get a woman on a financial basis? Is it a macho-derivative; that you must be the only breadwinner? What is it?

[CharlieH]

5 minutes ago, smotherb said:

I am always amazed at the numbers of men who accept a wife who is only an expense and never an asset. Why do so many men do that? Is it lack of self-esteem; the thought that you can only get a woman on a financial basis? Is it a macho-derivative; that you must be the only breadwinner? What is it?

Its a matter of personal choice and their relationship.Who is anyone to crticize or judge on what should or shouldnt be. Each to their own and whatever works for them. You couldnt possibly know what "asset" either posseses.

[marcusarelus]

7 hours ago, BritManToo said:

No bank will give a loan on a property without a clear proof of the ability to repay.

Maybe they could ten years back but not for the last five, banking has tightened up.

Not really the point.  While I appreciate all of the opinions this discussion about how a Thai person gets a loan is not really appropriate here.  40% of Thais have a loan from a bank.  That's a fact.  If one wants to get into a technical discussion of banking it should be in the banking forum.  Many ways to get a loan.  Brother loans money and land collateralize loan.  My wife's mother gives land to the children who give her money to live.  I'll make it simple.  Sell the house that Paddy expat gave Lilly Thai and both live off of the money - the alternative is starvation and the children being doomed to no education rice farming jobs - to listen the posters. 

 

Why anyone would marry a woman without a job or no job prospects is beyond me but that is not the point either.

 

I only made a simple point.  If they guy is being kicked out of Thailand because he used all of his cash to buy a home - reverse the process and use the equity in the home to help him stay. 

[BritManToo]

1 hour ago, smotherb said:

Why do so many men do that?

Pussy.

[smotherb]

54 minutes ago, CharlieH said:

Its a matter of personal choice and their relationship.Who is anyone to crticize or judge on what should or shouldnt be. Each to their own and whatever works for them. You couldnt possibly know what "asset" either posseses.

Where do you see I am denying personal choice? I am simply questioning something I do not understand.  Are you criticizing me for not understanding and asking questions?

 

As I said, I do not understand and ask why?  I have neither asked nor do I care about the specifics of the assets of anyone. An asset is "a useful or valuable thing, person, or quality" and expense is "the cost required for something; the money spent on something."  [google online dictionary]

 

Although it may have eluded your cognition, I was referring to choosing a woman who brings something to the relationship rather than choosing one who brings nothing other than her body.

 

Of course, that is anyone's right to do so; if they so desire. I am simply asking, what is it about that type of relationship that satisfies the men? 

 

And please, try not to confuse the questions. I know sex is important, but women who possess other assets can also provide sex; and sex can be had without engaging in a relationship.  So, why do so many men accept a relationship with women who bring so little to that relationship?

 

In my opinion, too many men have based their relationship on a depreciating asset--which may be a fundamental reason for so many divorces or broken/unhappy relationships. I listen to their complaints almost daily and read them so often here on TV.

[BTB1977]

Why would she put a loan on her house when she can find another farang that is more prepared for living here. A good way to weed out the lower class farang if you ask me. 

[BritManToo]

19 minutes ago, smotherb said:

So, at 74, I have still never done my own washing. 

You're confusing a nurse/home help with a girlfriend/wife/lover.

[GreasyFingers]

1 hour ago, smotherb said:

I believe more important is the love and trust between a man and woman.

But you said before you cannot love and trust a woman that does not provide some finance as well?

[Pravda]

5 hours ago, Gandtee said:

To counter the naysayers. My wife's family stepped up to the mark without being asked. Not all Thai women are there for the money.

 

Stepped up with what?

[CharlieH]

Off topic reported posts removed.

[CharlieH]

Flame post removed.

 

 

 

[swissie]

Gentlemen, I have read every post. Everybody is right. It depends on how much "creativity" each couple can muster to swim in the swamp called the "Thai Legal System" or the swamp called "Thai Banking". (I don't know wich one is worse).
It all focuses in on the present situation.

BUT WE MUST LOOK TO THE FUTURE:
- 5 years from now, only Farangs able to fork over 500K to purchase a 5 year Elite-Visa will be allowed to remain as "long term residents" in Thailand.

So what is Farang-Hubby to do until that time comes?
= For best effect, Farang-Hubby should not concentrate on how many times wife is willing and able to "stand up" for him, but rather how many times his wife is willing and able to bend over for Farang-Hubby during this horrible time of uncertainty. For best effect, making the best of the remaining time.

A humourus, meaningless post you say? Hardly. I have predicted every major change concerning Immigration Laws during the last 5 years at least 3 months in advance. Easy to do, if you have a stepdaughter that loves you dearly and has made a stellar career in Immigration. It may well be that Immigration-Legislation changes are implemented overnight, but it does not mean that those changes have not been under consideration for months before sudden implementation.

Back on Topic: As uncertanity looms as far as Immi-Laws are concerned make sure you have something that "stands up" in case wife is bending over. If she wonders where your inceased activity comes from just say "You think too much".

[smutcakes]

Why the hell would the lady do that? And rightly so. Most retirees with younger Thai women are marriages of convenience. The man gets to get his end away with a bird of an age and quality he could not dream of in his own country and the lady gets an element of financial security that otherwise she could not attain. Why would she or should she risk that?

 

If the relatationship does not give her finanical security then she may as well be shacked up with a local her own age who she actually has sexual attraction to.

 

Nothing wrong with that type of relationship as both parties get what they need. When one party, the lady does not get or have financial security here is literlly zero in it for them in having the relationship.

[marcusarelus]

10 minutes ago, smutcakes said:

Why the hell would the lady do that? And rightly so. Most retirees with younger Thai women are marriages of convenience. The man gets to get his end away with a bird of an age and quality he could not dream of in his own country and the lady gets an element of financial security that otherwise she could not attain. Why would she or should she risk that?

 

If the relatationship does not give her finanical security then she may as well be shacked up with a local her own age who she actually has sexual attraction to.

 

Nothing wrong with that type of relationship as both parties get what they need. When one party, the lady does not get or have financial security here is literlly zero in it for them in having the relationship.

The point is don't moan about the poor Thai family who have been treated to new homes and financial support when they are unwilling to help the man who provided it for them. 

[smutcakes]

4 minutes ago, marcusarelus said:

The point is don't moan about the poor Thai family who have been treated to new homes and financial support when they are unwilling to help the man who provided it for them. 

The only moaning i hear is whiny old retirees. Who is moaning about poor Thai families on here?

 

Why would the thai take a mortgage for the retirement visa possibly leaving her in debt when the only reason she was in the relationship was for security.

 

If they need to take a mortgage to meet the 800K requirement its possible their assets are not exactly great either. The 800k mortgagr might be more than her assets!!!

[smotherb]

On 2/16/2019 at 9:02 AM, BritManToo said:

You're confusing a nurse/home help with a girlfriend/wife/lover.

I was not always 74.  I believe you simply have to be smarter than the problem. I do not like menial jobs, so I find ways to get them done while I do things I like to do; always have. It is a matter of choice. Of curse. if you choose to do them, that is your decision. 

[marcusarelus]

23 minutes ago, smutcakes said:

The only moaning i hear is whiny old retirees. Who is moaning about poor Thai families on here?

 

Why would the thai take a mortgage for the retirement visa possibly leaving her in debt when the only reason she was in the relationship was for security.

 

If they need to take a mortgage to meet the 800K requirement its possible their assets are not exactly great either. The 800k mortgagr might be more than her assets!!!

There are a hundred posts about the real losers of the new regulations are Thai women and children. If you havn't seen them you havn't looked. 

[smutcakes]

7 minutes ago, marcusarelus said:

There are a hundred posts about the real losers of the new regulations are Thai women and children. If you havn't seen them you havn't looked. 

99% of the complaints seem to be about thelselves, i have seen few if any showing concern for their children or partner....

 

Maybe you can point me to a handful of posts of posters showing concern for their wifes and partners?