Happiness When Marrying a Much Younger Woman

[CanadaSam]

I have been trying to study this subject for a while now, and would like to hear (briefly if possible) from guys who have married much younger women in Thailand, and are now reasonably happy and content (both of you), the exact reasons why you seem to have made it, and why so many other marriages of unequal age unfortunately crash and burn.

[CharlieH]

What is your definition of "much younger" ? that might be a starting point, and I doubt that the OP could be answered properly if done "briefly". You have given no basis for your what can only be your assumptions.

 

Just saying.

[Small Joke]

Paging Harold and Nong Nat...

[sirineou]

 Now married for over 13 years and we could not be happier with each other. She is my best friend ad I hers. Don't get me wrong we do have our moments ,usually over stupid insignificant things.

  If I had to do it over again I would marry someone closer to my age.

   There is something to be said about growing old together. 

As I said above we are very close, and it distresses me to no end that one day I will die and live her along . 

[sanemax]

The usual problem is the age difference , some Thai ladies have the maturity of a 15 year old and you end up having more of a "Father/Daughter" kind of relationship , rather than Husband & Wife .

   A successful relationship would require the Male to have the mentality/maturity of a 15 year old as well 

[geoffbezoz]

This seems to be a biased post.  There are also Female TV members so shouldn't the question be aimed at both sexes marrying much younger partners, not just requesting feedback from males ?

 

Secondly what is the definition of "much younger"  ? A person who is 28 marrying someone who is say 21 are marrying someone 3/4 of their age although there is only 7years different so that could be considered by some as much younger. Although at the other end of the scale some who is 80 marrying someone 60 has a 20 year age gap but still 3/4 of their age so please define the parameters that you are seeking feedback on.

[Lacessit]

I will not marry my GF for financial reasons. Having said that, she is 24 years younger than me, and we have been together for 8 years. We are happy together.

Her daughter is drop-dead gorgeous. While my GF is street-smart, the daughter is an airhead. I could never envisage a long-term relationship with her if I was 30 years younger.

[OneMoreFarang]

I think more important than the age difference is the age of the girl/woman when you start the relation.

My gf was 16 when I met her. I was her first boyfriend ever.

And I didn't have a bad conscience because she told me she was 18. I only found out 2 years later when she was really 18.

We had our ups and downs but all together we are happy together.

I think an important part why the relationship works is that she has no bad-influence-friends. She doesn't play with facebook and all that crap. She does not even miss her phone if she forgets it at home. That definitely helps a lot.

[somtumwrong]

With a 17 years younger woman in her late 20's, she is still looking for overly romantic love and shows of passion and .. zzzz. I think they are healed / cured once they get a kid they can spoil and show love to. With older women, less need for the CONSTANT texting and I-love-you-so-much's. 

 

The nice thing is they both take care of you quite well, but seriously, that way too passionate teenage love can sometimes be bothersome! I understand those girls get disappointed in the love that may seem one-sided for them.

 

I had the fortune of never having a gf or wife who was too interested in my money. They all said they don't care about it, never really asked about my financial status. I've never had a bar girl, so maybe that explains it. So I don't think that is a reason to make or break a relationship.

 

As sanemax mentioned, try to avoid the father-daughter relationship, I think those girls need romance, not a dad :)

[geoffbezoz]

21 minutes ago, sanemax said:

The usual problem is the age difference , some Thai ladies have the maturity of a 15 year old and you end up having more of a "Father/Daughter" kind of relationship , rather than Husband & Wife .

   A successful relationship would require the Male to have the mentality/maturity of a 15 year old as well 

So please provide the reference data to support your statement   "A successful relationship would require the Male to have the mentality/maturity of a 15 year old as well".    Otherwise to be correct you should have stated it was your opinion rather than suggesting it was a fact.

 

Also I would question the bias to your statement that it is immature females. There are , I am sure, although only my opinion, that there are very many male Farangs and others in their 30's who by their ways indicate immaturity levels well below their actual years.

[sanemax]

Just now, geoffbezoz said:

So please provide the reference data to support your statement   "A successful relationship would require the Male to have the mentality/maturity of a 15 year old as well".    Otherwise to be correct you should have stated it was your opinion rather than suggesting it was a fact.

 

Also I would question the bias to your statement that it is immature females. There are , I am sure, although only my opinion, that there are very many male Farangs and others in their 30's who by their ways indicate immaturity levels well below their actual years.

It was quite clearly a personal opinion , it was so clear that it was a personal opinion,it really wasnt necessary to state as much .

  Yes, there are plenty of male felangs who act like teenagers and I did say that that would help in the relationship .

  Thank-you for advising me what I should have wrote , now may I give you some advice ?

How about you stop telling other people what they should do and searching posts for something you consider to be "biased" and unfair and looking for all inclusiveness ?

[somtumwrong]

Just now, sanemax said:

It was quite clearly a personal opinion , it was so clear that it was a personal opinion,it really wasnt necessary to state as much .

  Yes, there are plenty of male felangs who act like teenagers and I did say that that would help in the relationship .

  Thank-you for advising me what I should have wrote , now may I give you some advice ?

How about you stop telling other people what they should do and searching posts for something you consider to be "biased" and unfair and looking for all inclusiveness ?

Haha, wanted to say the same. Not the correct place to insist on fact-based intellectual analytical thinking. All on TVF is I-think-so -based, except for a few posting accurate visa information ???? Relax, mai bpen rai, who cares ???? 

[geoffbezoz]

10 minutes ago, sanemax said:

It was quite clearly a personal opinion , it was so clear that it was a personal opinion,it really wasnt necessary to state as much .

  Yes, there are plenty of male felangs who act like teenagers and I did say that that would help in the relationship .

  Thank-you for advising me what I should have wrote , now may I give you some advice ?

How about you stop telling other people what they should do and searching posts for something you consider to be "biased" and unfair and looking for all inclusiveness ?

Can I give you some advice ? stop giving others advice about giving advice because you were pulled up on the veracity of your statement.

[Mavideol]

1 hour ago, CanadaSam said:

and are now reasonably happy and content (both of you),

it appears all the answers coming from 1 side only, they should ask their partner's opinion,  thus a better way to assess the relationship

[taninthai]

Imho not all but a huge huge percent it’s money and the girl not having to get a job that makes these relationships work,I got involved with someone 14 years younger than me I’m 47 she was 33 lasted around 3 months ,as soon as I realised she was looking for  around 50k a month I was outta there????????????

[Mavideol]

Just now, taninthai said:

Imho not all but a huge huge percent it’s money and the girl not having to get a job that makes these relationships work,I got involved with someone 14 years younger than me I’m 47 she was 33 lasted around 3 months ,as soon as I realised she was looking for  around 50k a month I was outta there????????????

glad it only took u 3 months to realise that u were a mobile ATM

[sanemax]

15 minutes ago, somtumwrong said:

Haha, wanted to say the same. Not the correct place to insist on fact-based intellectual analytical thinking. All on TVF is I-think-so -based, except for a few posting accurate visa information ???? Relax, mai bpen rai, who cares ???? 

I do think that its the younger generation , they have become used to reading everything on-line and expect a link to everything , they just dont understand that some people still think and have their own opinion about things .

   (Disclaimer ^That is just my opinion and not a link postable fact )

[monkeycu]

My wife is 24 years my junior, after 11 years of my being happy, so she tells me I guess she is a keeper

My alternative, if I had stayed in Australia, would have been some old cow with untold kids grand kids and bad friends

So maybe my wife is right I am happy

[BritManToo]

1 hour ago, CanadaSam said:

and why so many other marriages of unequal age unfortunately crash and burn.

Hello again manfromanotherforum, I thought all marriages failed, so I might as well bang a young un while the going is good.

[somtumwrong]

2 minutes ago, sanemax said:

I do think that its the younger generation , they have become used to reading everything on-line and expect a link to everything , they just dont understand that some people still think and have their own opinion about things .

   (Disclaimer ^That is just my opinion and not a link postable fact )

I don't think so, look at the übercorrect vocabulary used, the intention on such use of language on forums like this are to display intellectual superiority. Cannot keep up with that as I'm a non-English native speaker ???? 

[NanLaew]

29 years difference.

 

12 years wed.

 

Two kids.

 

Still lovers.

 

Best of friends.

 

...apart from not thinking that marrying someone closer to my age would have been better,  just about 100% with what sirineou said earlier. When it comes to immaturity, the delightfully young, supremely smart and incredibly beautiful Mrs NL has put up with maybe 10 times the shit from me than I have ever had to take from her or her family.

 

I cannot even begin to postulate as to why others appear to have less luck. Everyone's circumstances are totally different and totally unique. This despite the borderline misogynists and cultural pygmies among us, who shouldn't have bothered in the first place and who should have just kept on bar-fining, saying otherwise.

 

This is my second Thai rodeo BTW, the first where the ages were far closer was the mother of train wrecks but it wasn't slow-motion. Thankfully.

[somtumwrong]

2 minutes ago, monkeycu said:

My wife is 24 years my junior, after 11 years of my being happy, so she tells me I guess she is a keeper

My alternative, if I had stayed in Australia, would have been some old cow with untold kids grand kids and bad friends

So maybe my wife is right I am happy

Hahhahhah, made me laugh. 'old cow'. Sometimes I see those recently landed western couples with the 'WIFE' and 'HUSBAND' t-shirts, the man having an old cow next to him. I can see those men having an intense processing moment upstairs and downstairs while parading with the old cow. The man is intensively studying the beautiful Asian women when the old cow is distracted or eating hay ????

[ratcatcher]

57 minutes ago, somtumwrong said:

I've never had a bar girl,

Neither did Paul McCartney, Johnny Depp or dozens of others who had ruinous divorces.  Not all bar girls are gold diggers and not all gold diggers are bar girls.

[Mavideol]

6 minutes ago, NanLaew said:

29 years difference.

 

12 years wed.

 

Two kids.

 

Still lovers.

 

Best of friends.

 

...apart from not thinking that marrying someone closer to my age would have been better,  just about 100% with what sirineou said earlier. When it comes to immaturity, the delightfully young, supremely smart and incredibly beautiful Mrs NL has put up with maybe 10 times the shit from me than I have ever had to take from her or her family.

 

I cannot even begin to postulate as to why others appear to have less luck. Everyone's circumstances are totally different and totally unique. This despite the borderline misogynists and cultural pygmies among us, who shouldn't have bothered in the first place and who should have just kept on bar-fining, saying otherwise.

 

This is my second Thai rodeo BTW, the first where the ages were far closer was the mother of train wrecks but it wasn't slow-motion. Thankfully.

marriage is like playing the lottery... sometimes u win and sometimes u loose, guess u are a lucky one, happy for u

[Yinn]

6 minutes ago, ratcatcher said:

 Not all bar girls are gold diggers 

Why they at the bar? To do the sex with the old tourist? You think they like that?

I think you are wrong. They want money.

[Mavideol]

1 minute ago, Yinn said:

Why they at the bar? To do the sex with the old tourist? You think they like that?

I think you are wrong. They want money.

how do you know that? always thought bar girls LOVED sex more than the money... guess I was wrong

[SteveK]

I don't know what the stigma is all about regarding being a walking ATM. I'm quite happy to act as such providing that I am getting good value.

 

I can take a relatively unattractive and overweight girl out for a meal in London and easily spend £75, and get nothing in return. If I spend that much on a night out with a super hot young Thai lady, I will always get something of value in return.

[villagefarang]

My wife is 20 years younger than me and we have been together for 22 years.

 

I had lived in Thailand for 20 years before we met so I spoke Thai, had a life of my own and had a lot of experience to rely upon.  First and only marriage for both of us and we decided not to have kids, which has been another plus.  I think our age difference has been a plus in our relationship.  We are both athletic and for the most part like and dislike all the same things.  We are both on social media and I do not see it as a negative in our relationship or our lives.

 

We still love each other and display it in both word and deed.????‍❤️‍????????????

[riclag]

 She is 22 years younger  a friend,companion and a lover in that order! We like music,dinners out, family,and we have many friends who aren't comparing their wealth and status!

 She's fond of being able to eat regularly  and buy second hand clothes. She and I  live in the city as opposed to her moo ban  style of  living in a shack,can't fault her there. damm roosters drove her and me crazy!

 

I don't mind paying a allowance, I can afford it! I never ask whats she does with her money.I know she helps pay for her daughters(sweetheart) college and throws her mother some money every month. The family hit me up once in 8 years for money(3k baht for repairs of the cow shed)I throw 6k baht for fertilizer and hired hands to cut rice every year

 

Been with her for 8 years and she still says thank you for loving me!

 

 

[XenZen]

1 hour ago, OneMoreFarang said:

I think more important than the age difference is the age of the girl/woman when you start the relation.

My gf was 16 when I met her. I was her first boyfriend ever.

And I didn't have a bad conscience because she told me she was 18. I only found out 2 years later when she was really 18.

We had our ups and downs but all together we are happy together.

I think an important part why the relationship works is that she has no bad-influence-friends. She doesn't play with facebook and all that crap. She does not even miss her phone if she forgets it at home. That definitely helps a lot.

so your gf was underage?   And you were how old?   And you know, if an American, American laws apply to you here.  

 

I let you respond before I continue....