Jump to content
BANGKOK
Whip Me Granny

Are you married to a Thai woman – Any Snippets of Advice .

Recommended Posts

Posted (edited)

If I had it to do over again knowing what I know today?  I would not have married a Thai woman.  It has to do with the xenophobia baked into the culture that runs from the average villager right through the fabric of the culture to the top echelons of the elite in Government House and beyond.  
Bottom line:  
You are an outsider!  You will always and forever be an outsider.  You are tolerated, not welcomed. You will never be accepted.  You will be considered suspect as a potential criminal for the entire duration of your life and as such tracked with more scrutiny than a violent Thai parolee.  And in your final days if as you are dying, if you are unable to manage your financial and immigration related affairs, your dying days could be spend dying and rotting on the floor in a Thai immigration detention center instead of at home surrounded by your family - because you sir, are an evil Farang and being comatose or an extremely sick invalid or a shell of a person due to dementia or Alzheimer's is no excuse for overstay - and don't even bother thinking that the Thai government has even a milligram of compassion for you, no less having the compassion to issue you a Medical Visa or 'bend the rules' and allow you to die in peace with the family that you have supported and loved for years or even decades.  Compassion is a one-way street.  Your compassion for your Thai family.  Compassion by Thais other than your own family will never be directed towards you in this country when it's citizens claim to be compassionate Buddhists.  That compassion is only for other Thais my dear Farang.
Foreigners are not respected here, only milked until the milk runs dry.


So Op.  My suggestion to you?  Find a woman in a country where you are welcome.  Thailand is not that country.  Don't even consider sinking roots - get out while you can.  

You've been warned!

 

 

 

 

Edited by connda
  • Sad 2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
21 hours ago, Lacessit said:

Don't get married. My GF and I are 8 years into a good relationship.

Look after the good ones well, and they will look after you even better. The trick is to find a good one.

If you are over 60, fathering children is not a good idea. Teenagers when you are in your seventies, and luk kreungs to boot?

Leave 80% of your assets in your country of origin.

 

Apologies if that doesn't fit within your template; however, you were asking for advice.

I live by pretty much the same rules. Though with regards to assets split I'd say just make sure you have some place to return to if all goes wrong. 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

When you are looking for a Thai wife, and you start dating one who is a maybe, if it is possible to be friendly with another farang whose Thai wife knows your intended and her family, find out all you can about them, as well of course your intended.

You should get a good idea of your intendeds past, the obvious things are, is she or her family likely to try and use you as a walking ATM?

Common sense should tell you what else you should try and find out, but financial circumstances and thinking of buying a house etc, should be at the top of the list.

You should of course ask about what you want to know in a very discrete way.

I have been with my wife for thirteen years and married for eight.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
22 minutes ago, bert bloggs said:

How sad your life must be ,been married 20 years ,courting before that ,she is just like women all over the world ,her family are great ,i am just one of them ,and my family in The UK like them and visit when over .

Am i lucky? no just normal like so many of my friends who have been married to Thai women for donkeys years .

Considering this is the reality of expat life in Thailand - yeah, it's sad.

SoD.jpg.834c752d363b34f30754dce278f688fd.jpg

  • Haha 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
24 minutes ago, possum1931 said:

When you are looking for a Thai wife, and you start dating one who is a maybe, if it is possible to be friendly with another farang whose Thai wife knows your intended and her family, find out all you can about them, as well of course your intended.

You should get a good idea of your intendeds past, the obvious things are, is she or her family likely to try and use you as a walking ATM?

Common sense should tell you what else you should try and find out, but financial circumstances and thinking of buying a house etc, should be at the top of the list.

You should of course ask about what you want to know in a very discrete way.

I have been with my wife for thirteen years and married for eight.

I checked her financial statement and made sure she could borrow 4 mil before we got married.  Same with any women in any country.  If they can't borrow money at a bank run away. 

  • Confused 2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
2 minutes ago, kenk24 said:

With all due respect as surely that is your experience, but not 100% the same for others. I differ on every point. 

 

1. My wife has a great family. We built in the village and then assisted the other family members to move onto our property. We have 4 homes in a compound and it was a great choice. They do not come in and out of my house, respect privacy and mostly we gather in the driveway, elders, kids, cooking together, roasting bananas, whatever. 

2. I have both given and lent money to members of family... all paid back in full and within reasonable time. I never had to ask for it back as I knew when they had the money, they would pay...

3. They don't tend to borrow things - we might borrow their tools. They are farmers and always there to help if anything needs to be done. 

4. We are not rigid with money in our marriage. I give my wife a certain amount monthly for her needs, food and some for family too.

She does not loan money and if there is a need for more, she asks. We do not have drunks or gamblers in the family. Just hard working, kind farmers who I am glad to help and I enjoy living with. 

 

your results surely vary... 

My brother in law lent me a tractor and a truck.  Said bring them back whenever, a year or two OK.  Glad I don't know you. 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

If you want a peaceful life hand over your ATM card and always make sure there is money in it as they say “ No Money No Honey “

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
3 minutes ago, crazykopite said:

If you want a peaceful life hand over your ATM card and always make sure there is money in it as they say “ No Money No Honey “

Adolescent behavior.  Adults have the lady borrow 4 mill and the male makes the payments.  Hence you become an important family asset.  If you leave the family goes broke because they can't make the payments. 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Posted (edited)
9 minutes ago, possum1931 said:

When I first met my wife, her house was half built, and obviously the bank gave her a mortgage, so to your way of thinking, I should not run. I didn't, and have now been with her for a very happy 13 years.

I'd agree 100%  I've been happy for 8 years and the loan is paid off in two.  Then she can buy a car. 

Edited by marcusarelus
  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    No registered users viewing this page.

×
×
  • Create New...