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Are you married to a Thai woman – Any Snippets of Advice .


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10 hours ago, Yinn said:

What you mum, dad, brother, sister, kid, friend, think about that?

 

Why would I care what the above cared about my wife, am I supposed to get upset that you are trying to dig up things about me, typical woman, upset.

 

The fact of the matter Yinn is, Thailand doesn't have prostitutes, isn't that right, but they found 7 the other day in Pattaya and they were foreigners, OMG, what do you think about that ?

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On 7/18/2019 at 5:43 PM, Skankhunt42 said:

She also works at a hotel reception, has done so for many years and says she has never worked as a bar girl.

How could you possibly know, you've never met her?

Believe women! guess you've got the t-shirt.

 

Looks like your 'SkankHunt' is finally over.

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11 hours ago, CharlieH said:

Diamonds and Gold and other precious things  are found as rocks in the dirt, they don't remain that way in the right hands.

Wow. CharlieH have the very sweet mouth! 

if original one? Is very good.

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2 hours ago, 4MyEgo said:

Why would I care what the above cared about my wife, am I supposed to get upset that you are trying to dig up things about me, typical woman, upset.

 

The fact of the matter Yinn is, Thailand doesn't have prostitutes, isn't that right, but they found 7 the other day in Pattaya and they were foreigners, OMG, what do you think about that ?

I think it not true. You found right?

 

you like to mock, criticize, complain, ridicule ALL thai people. 

BUt your knowledge about Thai is very, very small.

 

You have many post about you feel superior. Thai inferior. I read it. Again and again.

 You marry sex worker and live in Sakon Nakon. Ok, up to you. Lonely guy. But you knowledge only will be very small.

 

You can not speak thai. You can not read. You can not write. You can not even talk to your neighborhood. But many post about why you wonderful and thai people stupid. How you know everything? Impossible. Illiterate, deaf, mute.

 

 

 

 

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14 minutes ago, Yinn said:

I think it not true. You found right?

 

you like to mock, criticize, complain, ridicule ALL thai people. 

BUt your knowledge about Thai is very, very small.

 

You have many post about you feel superior. Thai inferior. I read it. Again and again.

 You marry sex worker and live in Sakon Nakon. Ok, up to you. Lonely guy. But you knowledge only will be very small.

 

You can not speak thai. You can not read. You can not write. You can not even talk to your neighborhood. But many post about why you wonderful and thai people stupid. How you know everything? Impossible. Illiterate, deaf, mute.

 

 

 

 

You know what Yinn, I have been a member on TVF for a few years now, and today I received my first warning from a moderator about a reply I made to you which apparently contravenes TVF policies, which of course I have to respect if I want to remain on the forum, which I do, as I feel I contribute to it in a positive way, as much as others do, that reply has now been removed as the moderator found it to contravene TVF policy as stated before, and there I was thinking it was being light, but then again, each to their own, dusted off !!! 

 

The above said, I will now go back to blocking you as I did once before, simply because of our differences of opinions, to put it mildly. You can continue to think what you like, I can only hope the moderator is fair and reads between your lines as well, and as the old saying goes, "have a nice life" ????

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On 7/18/2019 at 5:43 PM, Skankhunt42 said:

Hi all,

 

Just registered to this site and I must say thank you all for some great advise. 

 

Im going to Thailand later this year to meet a girl I have met online through a legitimate dating site. We have been friends on facebook for a long time and we talk through messenger and skype regulary so I am pretty convinced regarding that she really is who she say she is, meaning that she isnt no scammer. Through all the contact we have had so far money has never been a subject, meaning she has never ask me about how much I make and asked me for cash. She also works at a hotel reception, has done so for many years and says she has never worked as a bar girl.

Im not that naive, so I have to do some more research before I believe everything she says, at least regarding not never having worked as a bar girl. I guess I will find out more about that beeing true (or untrue) when I visit. 

 

Marriage has not been something we have discussed yet (to early for me anyway to think about a commitment like that), but if things work out when I visit we have talked about getting her a visa so she can visit me in my homecountry. 

 

But I was wondering, is it true that if you marry a Thai woman, you also marry her whole family? And will she always chose her family first regarding any situation? 

 

Hope somebody can answer me this. Thanks in advance. 

 

The biggest part of the problem here, is the extreme emasculation that is taking place in the West. Most men, in the US, Europe, and Oz, are no longer real men, when it comes to dealing with their women. Their women have made their lives so difficult, and alot of women have gotten so far away from their innate femininity, and have become dominant, and super controlling, and men just go along with it. Most men have become so hungry for love, or emotionally desperate for some kindness, and TLC. And most are so desirous of being around a real woman, who knows how to act like a woman, and manifest the dignity, within femininity. So, it is easy for the con artists, to take advantage of emotionally wounded men, who seem to be willing to do anything to regain a semblance of normality in their lives, with a decent woman. If she is a big baby, who only looks like a real woman, but in reality has the emotional development of a 13 year old, or if she is a con artist, if she is only in it for the money, those realizations will manifest themselves over time.

 

Always remember, if it is good, it is only going to get better. If there are problems, they will manifest themselves over time. The bottom line is this. Take your time getting to know a woman here, or anywhere. Time is your ally. It is rarely their ally. They are usually going to try to step up the timetable. We need to push back. We need to assert control. An environment like this allows us to do so. Take advantage of that. Be a man. Step up. Pay tribute to the gender. Refuse to lay down anymore. Refuse to be a doormat. Refuse to check your cajones at the door. Start making the decisions. I have so many friends, who come here, and from the very start, make the same mistakes they made back in the West. Except here, they do not need to make those mistakes. The environment does not dictate that they behave like lambs. Many do not know, or realize that, or they succumb to "force of habit". Every ship needs a captain. If the man is not willing to be the captain of the ship, the woman will take over, here in Thailand. Most women here seem to want a strong man. But, if they end up with a wimp, they will take over. Time allows clarity. Never, ever move too quickly. That is the undoing of most of these guys. Be a real man. Man up. Do yourself proud. 

 

In terms of the family, if she comes from a family without means, you are expected to help. The extend of the help you are willing to provide will depend on your means, and their needs. Make a determination of their world. The house they live in, their vehicles, the farm equipment, etc. And find out how much of that is borrowed money. Then determine if you are up for all of that.

 

If she is from a middle class family, there will be less of a need for all of that. Take your time! I cannot say that enough. Just because you have this online connection, that does not mean much in the real world. You cannot discuss a long term relationship or marriage, with someone you have never met. As of now, you are dealing with a ghost, a wish, and a dream. Only by spending time together, will you really know who she is, what she is made of, and what the potential is. 

 

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Been with my Thai-wife 10 years now and still madly in love with her. I think, because she is what I would define as a Thai-woman with a very "traditional" mindset. Not sure I could handle being married to a young modern-thinking Hi-So Thai-girl. 

 

Anyway, here are my 5 basic tips, based on the type of woman my wife is:

 

1. Do NOT expect to EVER be able to argue, debate or discuss most issues or problems with a Thai-woman, like you would with a western woman. In most cases a problem is actually best solved by not talking more about it. This will drive you completely nuts for the first years, until you learn to accept that. Once you have accepted it (If you have not gone insane before that), you will find yourself in a relationship with very few arguments, which is actually really nice.

 

2. If your Thai-wife ever shouts at you or starts to cry (extremely seldom), you have a serious problem. In most cases when this happens, you will not know why, but will discover it is due to a bunch of small stuff, because you and her never argue or debate issues. At that point, do not start to discuss, but just listen to her and let her talk. You do NOT want to experience or underestimate an angry Thai-woman!!! Just agree with ANYTHING she says and promise you will try to do better. She will then quickly calm down and get back to smiling.

 

3. NEVER and I mean NEVER let her lose face... especially not in public. This can sometimes happen without you realising it. E.g. you not talking sweet enough to her or accidentally interrupting her in front of others. Be extremely careful with this and again apologise, when it happens. Do NOT start to discuss/debate it!!!! (refer to no. 1 and 2) 

 

4. Get to understand and accept your role as The Man in the family. Do NOT try to enter her territory (meaning the housework, kids etc.). If you start to mess with her identity as a wife/woman, you can get in serious trouble because she will (in her mind) lose face towards you. I totally avoid helping with anything related to house work. When I have tried to help her, it has only ended badly. So no more... "It is your turn to do the dishes". 

 

5. Although you as a man have the role as the decision-maker in the family, expect your Thai-wife to manipulate the hell out of you, just like all other women in this world. She might be seen by others (especially westerners) as just a submissive Thai house-wife, but she is in fact the BOSS. Thai-women are properly the best manipulators in the world, because they know how to reach their goals, without discussions or debats. An idea will gently be planted in your head and you will think it is your idea and you are The Man. But make no mistake about it. SHE is the BOSS and it was her idea in the first place.

 

Otherwise it is actually pretty simple: If you treat a Thai-woman with love and respect, I find Thai-woman to be fantastic wives and mothers. Always happy, caring and smiling. What is there not to like about that? ????

 

The really hard part is learning to accept the "rules", which requires your brain to kind of fully reset to understand the culture and accept her way of thinking. This is what makes mixed marriages so much more challenging, than normal marriages with people from the same culture.

 

You either end up losing your mind and basic understanding of common sense.... or you wake up one morning finding yourself being in a great marriage. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Been happily married to my Thai wife for 10 years. She’s an American citizen, university educated in the US where we met at school and is quite a bit more Americanized than most Thais living in the US. She also speaks English at a native level but she still retains her Thai roots and character. Very loyal, loving and caring. Would do anything for me as I would for her. Hard worker as she runs her own retail store and does quite well. Can be a bit on the jealous side as I think most Asian girls are. I’ve heard of Thai women with very violent tempers when they go off but my wife just tends to get quiet when something bothers her. In 10 years of marriage I’ve never seen any explosion from her though others have had differing experiences I’m sure. You do need to understand their universal love of cooking and eatingThai food and you need to live somewhere she has access to Asian markets. We live in a large US metro area so it’s not an issue. Thai women are quite family oriented though mine seems happy with just an occasional Skype call from time to time mainly to talk to her younger siblings. Her family has flown over to the US once before for a stay and we will go over every three years or so as we are doing right now and spend some time seeing the sites and visiting her family in Chiang Mai where she is originally from. I am somewhat spared from the Thai tv shows as she prefers American movies when we watch tv at all. Though we will watch a Thai horror movie on Netflix from time to time. In my opinion
You can’t go wrong!


Sent from my iPhone using Thaivisa Connect

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