The week that was in Thailand news: Cheating - endemic yes, but not a Thai way of life.

rooster59 · June 22, 2019

The week that was in Thailand news: Cheating - endemic yes, but not a Thai way of life.

As a young teenager I can remember going to my local library in West Wickham in the outer suburbs of London. I needed an interesting book that wasn't like those (at the time) boring tomes by Hardy and Orwell or the indecipherable poems of Marvell that my teachers raved about and left me yawning and waiting for the bell at break time.

And there it is was on the shelf. A moment of epiphany if ever there was one! A massive, thick book waiting for me to devour.

It was simply entitled "Cheating".

As I hurried to the librarian's counter to take out the book I felt a bit shy as I always felt I was an honest character at heart. But I was reminded of the only thing Marvell had written that I ever grasped:

"He nothing common did or mean. Upon that memorable scene!" Yes! I wasn't Charles the First, just a humble teen, but here was a book that could change my life!

I was not interested in learning how to be a cheat myself. But I wanted to be forearmed. If the book taught me anything it was that there had been cheats throughout human history ever since the serpent conned Eve and Adam took the bait. And it taught me to be wary of everyone in this world no matter who they were and where I went.

Within ten years I had found my way to Thailand and discovered that just like the country of my birth everyone had the potential to be a disreputable cheat. The politicians and the police of my adopted homeland - despite the many miscreants in the Metropolitan Police in London of the 1970s - even seemed a tad more economical with the truth than I was used to back home.

And there were some areas where cheating seemed almost endemic. Were British men really as adept at cheating on their wives as the population I found in Bangkok or had I left England before the reality set in to shatter my naivety? One thing I felt sure of was that what the Thais often called "buying favors" was widespread. And cheating in school exams - both to get in and to leave - made what I had seen in London pale into insignificance.

As a cub reporter I had sneaked a quick peek at my neighbor's shorthand exam paper just to ensure I passed but here in Thailand people were paying the examiner for the paper in advance or even just paying for grades. And the answers in the driving test were marked even if you didn't pay for the "special licence service" that ensured success.

Despite yonks in the kingdom - and by no means wearing rose tinted specs - I don't believe that Thais or Thailand are any more dishonest than most. (Few places are like Japan and even they have Yakuza offices on the high streets!).

Monitoring the Thaivisa forum I am still appalled by the fact that it is peopled (if you can call them that) by posters who perpetually bash Thailand as the most dishonest place since round bread....

I have tried to teach my children right from wrong. And encouraged them to be honest. I expected them to con their dad at various points - but that was part of growing up and preparing for that bad world they were to join. My first wife hoodwinked me aplenty, but to be fair I gave as good as I got. The current Mrs Rooster is one of the most honest people I have ever met. This is more than can be said for her sister but I digress.

Yes, for me Thailand and the Thais are no worse than most. The overwhelming majority of the people I have met have been straightforward, upstanding and honest - which is why when I have met cheaters it has been all the more unpalatable.

So it was this week that I was forced to confront a disgraceful episode in the game I love that has marked three decades of my life in Thailand - tournament Scrabble. Readers new to the column may be saying WTF and trying to remember or Googling if the W and the F have the same point score. Believe me, I know they do!

In 1991 I started taking the game very seriously upon realizing that Thailand was a hotbed for Scrabble and had an international championship in Bangkok that was already in its seventh year. I picked up a dictionary called the OSPD from Asia Books and my life changed in an instant. I started practicing and studying 16 hours a day.

The Official Scrabble Player's Dictionary was read cover to cover then some. I destroyed the binding on a dozen such Thai made books through opening them repeatedly to check words. I started playing tournaments in Bangkok in 1992.

Within a few years I was the 19th ranked player in the world and in 1996 I was number one in Thailand, albeit for only a couple of months. I represented Thailand in World Championships and became an unofficial ambassador for the country. The Thai association's leader - now sadly deceased - became the best and most trusted friend of any nationality I have ever had. I loved the Thai Scrabble scene that enable me to meet so many great Thais, many of them honorable and kind males of all ages.

But two years ago some of the veneer came off when it was announced that the number one player in Thailand had been cheating. This news was all the more galling because as a writer on the game I had promoted his achievements in winning eight straight tournaments for an online site I worked for. I hailed it as an example of the brilliance of Thais and Thailand. The egg on my face was sticky.

The player concerned was banned for a year that many felt was not enough. I wrote all about this disgrace after I helped to reveal cheating in the United Kingdom by a former UK national champion who was a columnist for "The Times". My story printed on Thaivisa was scandalously ripped off and unattributed by the "Thunderer" who put it atop page three. They sacked the columnist after he was banned from competing for three years.

Subsequently after more exposes Rooster was banned from the world's leading site for Scrabble on Facebook. Talk about shooting the messenger!

But here in Thailand we tried to move on from our own scandal. The foreign know-it-alls said the offender would transgress again - cheats always do they said - if and when he was allowed back in competition. Unfortunately the know-it-alls were right. He did.

While us Thai players welcomed him back and were prepared to live and let live many had kept a sharp eye open for renewed signs of cheating from the former Thai number one after he started winning tournament after tournament again. On Saturday during the Eastern Championships in Sri Racha his opponent caught him red handed with a "P" and a blank tile in his hands under the table. He was ejected immediately and will now be banned for life.

I felt no need to wait to reveal this story that got more than expected traction on Thaivisa but was viewed by thousands of tournament players worldwide. I was criticized locally, in private, for jumping the gun but I was not having that. I went on the attack saying this was a Thai adult not a child. He had already cheated once and had transgressed again.

Though it was bravado designed to show how personally livid I was, I even threatened to go to the police. This cheat had stolen MY titles and taken my prize money. "Took my children's inheritance" as one of the investors on Dragon's Den always said! I knew how those chasing Lance Armstrong's butt around the Pyrenees must have felt!

Anyway, now he is gone and we don't have to be nice anymore. I'll try to forget the fact I lost 17 out of the last 18 games I played with this cheat. And with a major international championship coming up in Bangkok early next month it is a timely moment for the Thais in this gaming community to reassert what I have always felt - that it is honest and above board......rather an appropriate pun for Scrabble.

During my time as a school teacher at Harrow International School we were always mindful of presenting ourselves as honest and promoting honesty. Yes, there was plagiarism cases in the students' work - when is there not especially in the cut and paste age - but our entrance procedures and examinations were scrupulously clean. Ultimately both parents and students bought into that. The message was that we were incorruptible - children cheating once had all their exams invalidated. Twice meant expulsion. It hardly ever happened.

Our reputation - and that of many of the kingdom's foremost international schools - grew as a result of this stand on cheating. In my own after school Scrabble club children caught cheating were made to sit outside then got a Rooster rocket when everyone had gone home. Threatened with inordinate shame they never did it again; after reading that book from the library and being involved in gaming for decades I can usually spot a cheater (the anagram of teacher, incidentally).

Cheating as usual filled the news pages in one way or another in an eventful week on Thaivisa. Leading from the front was an organization whose anagram is JAUNT. Following on from the scandalous trickery that was the manipulation of the voting for the "New" PM came news from deputy dawg general Prawit Wongsuwan who is still Minister of No Defence.

An excellent editorial (once again) from The Nation showed Prawit's true colors when he belittled his nation's children for not having independent thought. Putting aside the obvious comment that not having thought is a positive attribute for army people, the editorial entitled "It takes a child to see the junta has no clothes" contained the following from Prawit:

“Teenagers could not express ideas about political developments in this way by themselves. They have must have been brainwashed, perhaps by teachers spiteful about the new [ministerial] portfolios”.

Go Prawit! We can't have the children criticizing us, can we now. Not on your watch!

Prawit may be nearing the end of his time - goodness only knows what all that pie must be doing to his arteries - but I hope that he lasts long enough to one day feel the wrath of the young when they come to hold power. Not least of all for "everything common he did and mean, on many memorable scenes".

Reminding us of the sexual cheating and infidelity inherent in Thailand - perhaps putting it on a par with what I have read about France! - was a highly amusing video clip from a wedding in which a Thai husband "wai-ed" his pregnant wife before extracting 100 baht from her handbag to pay some "pretties" serenading at his table.

The wife and the guests shrieked in approval at this amusing juxtaposition and most forum posters appreciated why this video had been shared tens of thousands of times among Thais. In translating the story I had told my editor - and included a line in the story - about how understanding the reaction to such a situation was at the heart of understanding Thai culture itself.

Sure enough some posters still didn't get it with some even going as far as to say that the Thai wife would remember this "disgraceful" display by her husband in the future. I commented that "Thaivisa" rests its case and was then lambasted by one poster who played the card of "living in Thailand for 26 years" and having more cultural knowledge in his left pinky than Rooster would ever have.

Yes, I'm sure the poster was right! As put-upon waiter Manuel once famously said in Fawlty Towers when asked about Basil's bet on the racehorse: "I know nothing. Nothing. I am from Barcelona".

Of course Rooster mentions his own longevity in Thailand frequently in this column. I never mean to brag about this, quite the opposite. And I truly find it quite amusing when I am in social situations where foreigners play the "I've been in Thailand a long time" card. Not least of all because I've met people who have been here a few months who know more than residents of many decades.

So, dear poster, while I recognize that you have done jolly well in learning to spell English and speak Thai, I do happen to know that 'know' starts with a "K".....oh, and (Big Head alert) I TAUGHT Thai for two decades.

Admittedly teaching Thai in Thailand meant a little skulduggery though certainly not cheating! I reserve that for matters of little importance that helped me along my Thai language path. Like pretending to be a marine biologist or a racehorse trainer when talking to Soi Cowboy wenches in my formative years; practicing my spoken Thai and improving my vocabulary were the aims not deception per se.

One other story this week reminded me of being "prayat" with the "khwaam jing" (economical with the truth). An Italian couple - somehow ridiculously compared to Signora Bonnie and Signor Clyde - were nabbed in Thailand for pretending to be George Clooney to flog clothes online.

Over the years - particular more recent years for some reason - I have been mistaken for Robert De Niro in the street or shopping centers. When it happened for the third time I decided to sign an autograph with "Best Wishes from Bob". Mrs Rooster - in her absurd honesty - said in Thai I was a disgraceful old snake head. I told her in English to "Meet the Fockers" and she went off in a huff.

(Mindful of the old cliche that all Thais think Westerners look alike, I'd be interested to see in comments what actors and actresses readers might have been mistaken for in Thailand).

Less cheating and more jumping on a familiar bandwagon was the Facebook poster contacted by the Thai media in Bangkok who took a picture of a person she claimed was Chinese having the mother of all dumps in Yaowarat (appropriately enough Bangkok's Chinatown). Out came the usual bashers of the Central Kingdom proletariat who were somewhat abashed next day when Thai Rath revealed that the guy in the picture was a Thai boy with autism.

Coming on the back of the previous week's "Urine-gate" story on the Airport Link this was good news for the Chinese though don't hold your horses that this will be the last such story. The click-a-thon such items generate are part and parcel of all online "news" organisations these days! If you want to show your disapproval of that.....don't click!

On Thursday came news of a cheating taxi driver. This one had found 2.8 million baht in a 7-Eleven plastic bag and kept it for himself. It fell not just into the cheating category but the couldn't make it up department! Worapong was eventually rumbled by a combination of JS100 radio station and several police departments.

The loot had been with Worapong's brother in Ratchaburi and when it was returned to the Chinese people who had left it on the back seat of the cab it was found to be 35,000 baht short! They didn't want charges to be pressed and the cops fined Worapong 1,000 baht for refusing a fare. I wonder who got that money....my book on cheating never warned me about such cases.

In the south of Thailand Sanook told us that film fans - and the TAT - were frothing at the mouth with the prospect of "The Fast and the Furious 9" that will be filmed in Krabi, Phangnga, Phuket and Surat Thani. The head of the Krabi TAT drooled about the free advertising for the limestone cliffs while the Thai public welcomed the illegal super cars and "big bikes" to the Thai roads displaying not a hint of irony.

How this could all backfire if the movie only succeeds in highlighting the carnage on the Thai roads. Daily News reported that 7,000 had now died at the scene of accidents in the kingdom this year. The figure - as mentioned by Dr Thaejing Siriphanich of the anti drink driving foundation last week - is more like 12,000 per half year or 24,000 per annum.

The authorities are rubbing their hands at the estimated 341 million baht brought in by the filmmakers and all that free advertising. Might I suggest that the money goes to good,free helmets for school children. That way they might actually get to see the movie rather than becoming statistics on the way to the theater.

This week the Bangkok governor announced the progress and expected completion date for the 20 billion baht project to bury the city's infamous hanging wires. Of course it is a nationwide problem and one that was highlighted a few years ago by Bill Gates who posted pictures of the tangled messes.

Amusingly, one of the zones where work is underway is Withayu.....the Thai word for radio that gives its name to the avenue known as Wireless Road in English. I always found it amusing to ask my Generation Z students why they thought the road would be called Wireless. Their answer was obvious. They were always surprised that the word was so old fashioned that the likes of their teacher used to wince at its usage as it smacked of the older generation and their wartime "crystal sets".

Finally, Tesco have said during a meeting in the UK that they are planning a big expansion of convenience stores in Thailand with 750 more to add to their approximately 1,500 at present. Judging by some of their prices at my local Tesco Express I doubt they will bring much competitiveness to the local scene.

What Thailand needs is what the UK has experienced in recent years with price wars initiated by German companies. The cost of many items in our shops in Thailand reveal how we are being collectively fleeced.

So Aldi and Lidl - where are you?

Come stop the cheating.

Rooster

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thequietman · June 22, 2019

Over 50 paragraphs! Can I assume brevity is not one of your skills?

It must be a nightmare initiating a conversation with you!

Yawn. ????

marcusarelus · June 22, 2019

1 minute ago, thequietman said:

Over 50 paragraphs! Can I assume brevity is not one of your skills?

It must be a nightmare initiating a conversation with you!

Yawn. ????

A paragraph is not a measure of length. Might I suggest counting words.

villagefarang · June 22, 2019

1 hour ago, rooster59 said:

(Mindful of the old cliche that all Thais think Westerners look alike, I'd be interested to see in comments what actors and actresses readers might have been mistaken for in Thailand).

Edward Norton in American History X, Bruce Willis during his Die Hard days, Ben Kingsley form I don’t know. There have been others but they don’t come to mind at present. A shaved head, a mustache and goatee seem to make us all look alike.????

I almost forgot, Sir Patrick Stewart as Picard in Star Trek, after I shaved.

Samui Bodoh · June 22, 2019