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At 70 years old I’m looking for the antidote – Do you have it?


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You are merely (a little late perhaps) coming to terms with your own mortality, wait a while, once your mind has accepted it you will settle down. Birth and death, it's a natural cyclus, nature is very good at what it does, it's had lots of practice.

Your 'me' is worried, at death it won't have control, but it never really did anyway, 'me' is just a concept built by society and believed by the mind. If you had been born in the Amazon jungle, same body, same brain, your me would be different from the one born in London, so 'me' doesn't really exist, it isn't fundamental, you are an idea, an appearance. It is as it is and you have no control, why worry? I shall be 71 in July and I am grateful for 'being' so long.

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12 hours ago, Whip Me Granny said:

Has any one here who has come to realize that they like myself are on the final stretch managed to find an antidote that at least makes you feel better , less stressed out and more acceptable of the  approaching inevitable outcome.   If you have found an antidote could you please share it 

Funny I have been telling my older sister for years now to enjoy life because we are in our final stretch just as you said ????

 

But I also tell her even if we have 20-25 left that is still nothing. So enjoy it don't waste time thinking about when the end will come just know

we all get the same prize at the end of this great trip

 

Your doing well health wise & that is about as good as you can do with your diet & exercise.

But mental health may be even more important

 

Take the time to look around smell the roses etc etc

Maybe this is one Thai saying with a good reason....No Tink Too Mutt ????????

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12 hours ago, marcusarelus said:

I used to write more and still have many things to share but I have stopped.  I don't like the criticism that writing brings.  One of my children says something or posts something on facebook incredibly stupid and I no longer even comment.  Why start a fight.  My wife does something outrageous and I just blow it off.  Old friends try to talk to me about Trump or some other idiot and I turn off my ears.  I take my dog for a walk and talk to her.  I watch the Thai people and that is an endless source of amusement.  I cook more.  I made the mistake of recommending a wine here and 4 people started a fight with me about my taste in wine.  No winning so why bother.  If I got depressed I'd talk to my doctor about some anti depressants - a lot of mild ones out there now.  My mom took some after her second stroke and she was nicer than she had been in her whole life - people could actually tolerate her and some even started liking her.   

I have a low threshold to stupidity so I don't do social media  ????

 

The anti depressant thing makes me wonder ?

 

 

 

 

 

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12 hours ago, NCC1701A said:

I'm 63 and I told my girlfriend that every month I am traveling somewhere alone because she can't come with me due to her business. 

 

I still can ride my motorcycle but every year it gets heavier. :)

 

I am in very good health and I am going to keep banging away until I drop.

Sadly I now look forward to a good steak dinner and red wine more than a bedroom romp ????

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11 hours ago, CharlieH said:

"So I was wondering what other forum members here who are also getting on in years like my self are doing to try and combat any similar thoughts.  Have you also reached a point in your life where you now know like me that your time on earth is slowly running out."

 

 

Easy, just forget it ! dont think too far ahead, enjoy the now.

We all have a "use by date" we just dont know what it is, and when it arrives thats it.

So, dont worry about what might happen, concentrate on what is happening.

Its only a problem if you allow it to be.

 

I wish I could stop thinking ahead but there are so many reminders . Every time I see that some famous person had died and they were about my age the thought of bugger that could have been me springs to mind ????

 

 

 

 

 

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11 hours ago, emptypockets said:

I think part of the problem is people retiring. After a lifetime of working suddenly a lot of things stop.

Work is much more than simply turning up and getting paid.

There is the social and spiritual aspect to work (not the god bothering spiritual type) but the good feeling for me spiritual thing - I feel valued thing. A sense of worth.

 

Men need 3,000 interactions a day (interactions meaning talking , phone calls etc etc) women need 5,000 interactions.  Did you ever wonder why you came home from work knackered and the wife just wanted to blah blah blah?... Now you know!!

 

I'm 63 and love the job I have in a country close to Thailand. See the wife every three weeks for two weeks or so.

Keeps me intellectually on the top of my game.

 

To the OP - find a challenge.....buy a telescope and try and find a new comet!

Download the Pacer app to your phone - try and walk 10,000 steps a day.

 

 

Keep your brain active after all it is the second most important male organ (joking)

 

Retirement was another thing that I never really considered , it just arrived and I thought it would lead to contentment , but then old father time put his foot in my door and made me realize that the next phase of my life is only going to become more stressful . This getting old is like an unstoppable virus ????

 

 

 

 

 

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11 hours ago, brokenbone said:

no girl is ever going to be intimate with you again

so why would you want to linger on in this nasty place ?

the only thing left is pain, cramps, digestive issues and so forth,

thank goodness youre soon outa here.

only catch is the moment you exit,

have a nice one

Well that's made me feel a lot better ????

 

 

 

 

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11 hours ago, Benroon said:

To be honest OP it sounds like you are in the grasp of mild depression, maybe seek a good quack, not someone who lunges for the anti-depressants 2 minutes after you walk in. Cognitive Therapy does wonders for some and is known to alter distressing thought patterns which you seem to be experiencing. Try not to let it consume you. Keep busy.

 

Becoming aware of your own mortality isn't easy - a few suggestions are here

 

https://ask.metafilter.com/26347/Coming-to-terms-with-ones-own-mortality-for-dummies

 

Also there's a book called Quiet Your Mind by John Selby - worth a read 

I wondered about depression but dismissed it as some thing only unstable types seem to suffer with ???? but now I come to think of it . I am feeling some what unstable my self .

 

 

 

 

 

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4 hours ago, Puchaiyank said:

With your lifestyle...you could live to be 90 or more...life is what you make of it...happiness comes from within...don't worry...be happy!   ????

Ah my life style . On the face of it any one who knows me I’m sure sees a happy outgoing sort of chap who all ways has a smile and boundless energy . Some one who looks like they have it all,  a lovely family and financially ok. A guy that seems not to have a care in the world . In reality if the people who know me could step inside my mind they would see a darker place filled with an un smiling and worried man . A person who has come to realize that some day soon his clock will stop ticking ⏱️

 

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Hear what you are saying. getting old is not fun and like you say it's not a nice thought knowing that time is running out.

 

I have no advice (although I'm sure plenty on here will) but console yourself in thinking that every person is the same, and you have lived longer than a lot of other people, in some cases a lot longer.

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4 hours ago, BritManToo said:

At 63 I've had enough and will welcome death (but not illness).

Why keep going, I've done everything I wanted.

63 and had enough ????

 

I’m not saying that I have had enough just the opposite I want to have even more ????

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After reading above posts I got depressed. Anybody have antidote?
I lived many lives, if the OP would have eternal life, he would ask for an antidote as well.


Sent from my iPhone using Thaivisa Connect

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4 hours ago, Puchaiyank said:

With your lifestyle...you could live to be 90 or more...life is what you make of it...happiness comes from within...don't worry...be happy!   ????

Just don't take a bus trip anywhere

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Ive seen the word Antidepressant used . I was wondering if there's some thing I could take that would have the same calming effect , some thing to make me less stressed out and more able to dismiss my fears , other than getting a doctor to prescribe a drug. Have you come across any thing that would fit the bill?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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12 minutes ago, Essex Reject said:

Hear what you are saying. getting old is not fun and like you say it's not a nice thought knowing that time is running out.

 

I have no advice (although I'm sure plenty on here will) but console yourself in thinking that every person is the same, and you have lived longer than a lot of other people, in some cases a lot longer.

Can I ask how old you are ?

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7 minutes ago, Essex Reject said:

Another thing that irritates me a little is that as you get older you start to realize a lot of the things you wanted to or places you wanted to go to is not going to happen. 

Please don't get me started with my reoccurring   '' I wish I had ''  regret .  Daily I see some thing or hear some one talking about a thing that they have done , some where they visited or some thing they achieved , and all I can think to my self is . I wish I had done that or done this , or I wish I had !!! , but sadly like you so aptly point out at my age its not going to happen ????

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1 hour ago, soalbundy said:

Birth and death, it's a natural cyclus, nature is very good at what it does, it's had lots of practice.

Not sure how anything in the "homo sapien" world is "natural" anymore (or for the last 2000+ years) 

Yet I agree in spirit

Reminds me of the thoughts and poem about life by Rumi.  https://blog.mindvalley.com/poems-about-life/

 

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Gardening. It helps your mental health. The endless sight of things dying and being born makes you realize that life is an endless cycle not a race for fulfillment. 

 

When I had a personal tragedy a few years ago I lost my garden and became depressed. Now I'm back into it in a simpler way, mostly houseplants, and have bucked up considerably. At our age gardening is the new sex. 

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10 minutes ago, Whip Me Granny said:

as you get older you start to realize a lot of the things you wanted to or places you wanted to go to is not going to happen.

No regrets - no worries

 

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I'll be 75 in September, and my antidote is PMA. Positive Mental Attitude. To the OP it's clear that physically, you're healthy enough, but your mind has run off the track. I tend to live for today, avoid stress as that WILL shorten your life span, and never cross your bridges before coming to them.

 

As for antidepressants, that's not an answer. It merely dulls reality. So you're 70 - big deal - plan on living and enjoying a healthy life until you reach 100. That's your immediate target.

 

   

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25 minutes ago, Whip Me Granny said:

Ive seen the word Antidepressant used . I was wondering if there's some thing I could take that would have the same calming effect , some thing to make me less stressed out and more able to dismiss my fears , other than getting a doctor to prescribe a drug. Have you come across any thing that would fit the bill?

Many use buspar to stop smoking or help with anxiety and things like that but a trip to the doctor is only 500 baht at a reputable hospital.  

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12 minutes ago, Whip Me Granny said:

Ive seen the word Antidepressant used . I was wondering if there's some thing I could take that would have the same calming effect , some thing to make me less stressed out and more able to dismiss my fears , other than getting a doctor to prescribe a drug. Have you come across any thing that would fit the bill?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

.

Your own mindset is the most powerful antidepressant. Last night the armoured rubber water pipe leading to the tap in the kitchen blew. The floor was covered in flood water. I knew from experience (this happened a few years ago) that the pipe was extremely difficult to reach. I became illogically angry at the situation, lying on the floor looking up at the half hidden pipe I said, "this is impossible". I snapped out of it. I made a cup of coffee and told myself two things, (1) this is the way it is, anger is stupid and pointless, (2) It isn't impossible, you've done it before. I started to remove the pipe and did it in 5 minutes (a couple of years ago it took me half an hour) In the morning I replaced it with a new armoured plastic pipe, again 5 minutes. I had changed my mindset from negative to positive.

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13 hours ago, marcusarelus said:

I used to write more and still have many things to share but I have stopped.  I don't like the criticism that writing brings.  One of my children says something or posts something on facebook incredibly stupid and I no longer even comment.  Why start a fight.  My wife does something outrageous and I just blow it off.  Old friends try to talk to me about Trump or some other idiot and I turn off my ears.  I take my dog for a walk and talk to her.  I watch the Thai people and that is an endless source of amusement.  I cook more.  I made the mistake of recommending a wine here and 4 people started a fight with me about my taste in wine.  No winning so why bother.  If I got depressed I'd talk to my doctor about some anti depressants - a lot of mild ones out there now.  My mom took some after her second stroke and she was nicer than she had been in her whole life - people could actually tolerate her and some even started liking her.   

What a dumb irrelevant post !    hahaha   just wanna be the first to say that .   You pretty much have summed up the way I am going .  Less posts  ( sound of TV members falling over their like buttons) ...

less comments,  less getting involved in the petty games of ego and whatever.  Hey, if my GF  thinks englebert humpledink is a great singer,  so be it.   As a friend used to say... getting old is no fun. ( that should start another round of folks telling me this is the best years of their life).   Whatever.  To the OP:

best thing for me is try to have some sort of routine and keep active...  70 year old active ????

And to MA..... ignore the fighters.  I don't know what wine you like but its fine with me !

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