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Need advice on marital situation


OzFlyer

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2 hours ago, coastguard said:

Bite the bullet.

 

I love my lady to death. But you are young and barely know your children. If you don't speak Thai it will only get worse. THere is no way to connect to them. It may be you sperm, but they are aliens to you. Do a runner.

Kids are still young. Daughter can speak a little bit of English.

 

Wife doesn't want them beyond 7. Speaking to another member on here and he's right, Thai women only like them when they are "cute". 

 

I certainly won't be doing a runner. First step is get a DNA test.

 

If I don't get custody then visitation rights it is I guess. I'll have to cross that bridge when I get to it. She'll eventually turn into a wh0re anyway as she'll be bankrupt or in jail so needs to sell something to get $

 

Not my problem when she opens her legs, couldn't care less. I've had her at her best although BritManToo disagrees !

 

Kids are priority now.

 

 

 

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2 hours ago, herwin1234 said:

she sounds like a smart independent minded lady with good busines instinct. AND omg the money she earns from her business she spends on the household. she obviously cares for the family and take good care.

on the other hand, you, complaining that the 1 million baht didnt return to you....thats pretty selfish, she did return the money to the family, right?

she asking for money. yes of course, she doesnt spend it on lotery or buying a motorcycle, but spends it more smart long term fami.y in mind. omg, you are suggesting she should ask the money from her parents?? No good Thai girl would ever do that, the rather would GIVE and not take, money to their parents.

You think about yourself, me, me, me, my money, she thinks about the family. yes of course she asks your financial aid, you are the HUSBAND. 9n short you have to learn more about (traditional) Thai women and relations, you have to start thinking positive about her, think about the family, and.....if she asks money, she is smart, you give but not too much and just explain the amount. 

If you think you are "right" and she is"wrong" than there is no hope. learn about her, Thai relations, and think about family, and, again, if she made a succesfull business, that says she is a positive profesional woman. dont underestimate her. 

lastly, her family is in isan, its pretty selfish of you to want to take her to a farang city for no good reason. why seperate her from isan and her family, and her many friends, you force her to live in a region and city she dont know no friends no family. pretty thoughtless i would say. you treat her as a puppet. 

jesus

 

you didn't read the bit about fraud, bounced cheques and arrest warrant pending

 

 

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3 hours ago, OzFlyer said:

Does anyone know how much is it to run a small rubber plantation? We're talking a tiny one....

 

I am thinking she "loaned" her family and friends the majority of that investor money and they spent it all and can't pay back. That's plausible.

 

Why would a sick person spent all that money when it wasn't meant to be spent? Trying to work out if she has a mental condition or it's purely ignornance and greed

 

 

 

 

Lets see.  I put up 1 million Baht for 2 Rai of land.  Then another 500,000 to plant trees.  The trees can not be even processed until they are almost 10 years old and can then be tapped.  Weekly upkeep and watering and fertilizer another 100,000 for the first year.  So I was into it for my now ex-wife approximately 1.6 MB.  Nothing other than upkeep costs and if at the age of tapping just the cost for the tappers to come and do the work.  Transport of the product to a wholesaler and then getting paid pennies on the dollar at this point.   Someone has hidden the money or has bought other property in other names somewhere or given money to someone else.  I was lucky, mine kept asking for more and more and when I would not she left me for a millionaire she found on-line.  Yes they cheat when you are not around, It is how many Thai women act.  Infidelity means nothing, they watch to many LaKorns.

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14 hours ago, ThailandRyan said:

Lets see.  I put up 1 million Baht for 2 Rai of land.  Then another 500,000 to plant trees.  The trees can not be even processed until they are almost 10 years old and can then be tapped.  Weekly upkeep and watering and fertilizer another 100,000 for the first year.  So I was into it for my now ex-wife approximately 1.6 MB.  Nothing other than upkeep costs and if at the age of tapping just the cost for the tappers to come and do the work.  Transport of the product to a wholesaler and then getting paid pennies on the dollar at this point.   Someone has hidden the money or has bought other property in other names somewhere or given money to someone else.  I was lucky, mine kept asking for more and more and when I would not she left me for a millionaire she found on-line.  Yes they cheat when you are not around, It is how many Thai women act.  Infidelity means nothing, they watch to many LaKorns.

The one debt around 5-6MB she did offer to sell me the youngest to pay some of it off. I refused.

 

She is banking on the fact that creditors need their money back so she will avoid jail time by making repayments to them. Because the amounts are too great I don't think that is going to fly. How can someone be so brazen to get away with taking on that much debt, writing bounced cheques? If she doesn't do jail time that means anyone can operate a ponzi scheme in thailand with impunity.

 

With her, about 2 years ago I unequivocally told her I ain't bailing her out of the business debts. The amounts are too great. "It is your debt". 

 

If and when she finds her next victim, if he doesn't pay her debts she'll end up doing the same to it. This is all about business and love is for fairytales.

 

She gave me an ultimatum of 50,000-100,000B per month which I sure as hell was not going to do as the number would have kept on climbing. If I was enabling her operation she would have taken on more debt.

 

She can't travel out of the country either; they've seized her passport.

 

How much money out of interest did she ask you to pay for this rubber business?

 

Edited by OzFlyer
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1 hour ago, OzFlyer said:

The one debt around 5-6MB she did offer to sell me the youngest to pay some of it off. I refused.

 

She is banking on the fact that creditors need their money back so she will avoid jail time by making repayments to them. Because the amounts are too great I don't think that is going to fly. How can someone be so brazen to get away with taking on that much debt, writing bounced cheques? If she doesn't do jail time that means anyone can operate a ponzi scheme in thailand with impunity.

 

With her, about 2 years ago I unequivocally told her I ain't bailing her out of the business debts. The amounts are too great. "It is your debt". 

 

If and when she finds her next victim, if he doesn't pay her debts she'll end up doing the same to it. This is all about business and love is for fairytales.

 

She gave me an ultimatum of 50,000-100,000B per month which I sure as hell was not going to do as the number would have kept on climbing. If I was enabling her operation she would have taken on more debt.

 

She can't travel out of the country either; they've seized her passport.

 

How much money out of interest did she ask you to pay for this rubber business?

 

I never gave her the chance. I walked and filed for divorce back in the US where she also has citizenship. I sold my house in the US. Booted her to the curb and refused any more to give her. She signed the papers because her new millionaure boyfriend is a CEO in Ohio and he moved her there. We put the property and the rubber farm in our daughters name who we have joint custody of and I pay nothing for support as she did not want any problems. Her new husband was smart and had her sign a pre nuptial.  I guess i was lucky. I moved back to Bangkok from the US after the divorce.  Her parents are overseeing the property but her new husband has to pay for anything regarding the farm.  I still retained the rights to the house as its also in the daughters name, and my yellow book and pink ID card are tied to it. who is in the US with her mother.

Edited by ThailandRyan
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Latest update:

*Received an angry phone call. Saying she wants a divorce. I asked her if she has a new man? Initially she said no. Then later she said "someone new has come into my life". I told her I don't believe you, write a statement with his name and your name and words to the effect you cheated on me. She said I am not going to do that, why should I give you his name, I just want to divorce you at the amphur. I said I want to get a court divorce...she said if you do that I won't attend court. 

 

(I think she says she won't attend court because she actually can't afford it. She did say earlier that she wants to avoid lawyers to make it cheaper).

 

*Words like this "I need a divorce quickly, please, can you do that for me"...why the rush? is it because of the arrest warrant date approaching and she doesn't want any complications being a married woman under investigation? It just seemed weird the urgency of it all. It's like all of a sudden as the surrender date was looming her language changed.

 

*What man would want to be with someone saddled with so much debt? She must be lying through her teeth or it's all b/s. Either way I don't need to worry about her debt ever again and that's the main thing.

 

 

 

 

 

*Mentioned that our 2 kids are weighing down on her mum. Her mum can't afford to look after both kids.

 

*Said that I didn't send them any money last 6 weeks and that's not fair. I am not a good husband. My explanation: if I sent her money she would spent it on dating and her debts not the kids. Also I deliberately cut the money supply to them to cripple them financially and put them under pressure. If she was such a good business woman, why does she need my measly 10,000B a month anyway? Sounds like she is under financial pressure and can't even afford 10,000B.

 

*Wants to give me full and sole custody of both children. I was shocked and expected a fight. More on that later...

 

*Said the police issue is "easy, i shall fix it...You don't worry about my debt problem, i will fix it".....How? with what money? sugar daddy gonna pay for a 30 year old single mum with 2 kids and stretch marks? I smell b/s here. Maybe she wants to get rid of me and focus on herself. Maybe start dating again, just be free.

 

What 30 year old university educated Issan white-collar faux CEO mother gives up two small children so easily without a fight? I was expecting a lengthy court battle. The only thing I am interested is in the 2 kids, nothing else.

 

I am just shocked she is going to hand them on a platter, sign them both away to me. 

 

What the <deleted> is going on here? she's flipped the script on me. I was expecting to have to pay for both kids. She is giving them away FOR FREE.

 

Edited by OzFlyer
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On 7/12/2020 at 7:20 AM, OzFlyer said:

That's the part that makes me angry. I can't leave Australia to confront her about her affairs.

 

Technically I can leave Australia with an exemption and if flights are available but then I am stuck there and potentially in legal trouble myself if they begin proceedings against her and I am in the country. They could very well come after me also even though I have nothing to do with the situation. It's Thailand, anything is possible. It's just not safe for me to be there right now until her debts are resolved and/or she's locked up.

 

The attorney I spoke to strongly advised me to not think about getting on a plane to Bangkok until they have an idea about her legal situation. I was advised to also run a police check on my name to make sure I wouldn't be detained at the airport.

 

 

 

 

Best you stay put, don't need to make it worse.

 

Listen to the lawyers.

 

 

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19 minutes ago, OzFlyer said:

Latest update:

*Received an angry phone call. Saying she wants a divorce. I asked her if she has a new man? Initially she said no. Then later she said "someone new has come into my life". I told her I don't believe you, write a statement with his name and your name and words to the effect you cheated on me. She said I am not going to do that, why should I give you his name, I just want to divorce you at the amphur. I said I want to get a court divorce...she said if you do that I won't attend court. 

 

(I think she says she won't attend court because she actually can't afford it. She did say earlier that she wants to avoid lawyers to make it cheaper).

 

*Words like this "I need a divorce quickly, please, can you do that for me"...why the rush? is it because of the arrest warrant date approaching and she doesn't want any complications being a married woman under investigation? It just seemed weird the urgency of it all. It's like all of a sudden as the surrender date was looming her language changed.

 

*What man would want to be with someone saddled with so much debt? She must be lying through her teeth or it's all b/s. Either way I don't need to worry about her debt ever again and that's the main thing.

 

 

 

 

 

*Mentioned that our 2 kids are weighing down on her mum. Her mum can't afford to look after both kids.

 

*Said that I didn't send them any money last 6 weeks and that's not fair. I am not a good husband. My explanation: if I sent her money she would spent it on dating and her debts not the kids. Also I deliberately cut the money supply to them to cripple them financially and put them under pressure. If she was such a good business woman, why does she need my measly 10,000B a month anyway? Sounds like she is under financial pressure and can't even afford 10,000B.

 

*Wants to give me full and sole custody of both children. I was shocked and expected a fight. More on that later...

 

*Said the police issue is "easy, i shall fix it...You don't worry about my debt problem, i will fix it".....How? with what money? sugar daddy gonna pay for a 30 year old single mum with 2 kids and stretch marks? I smell b/s here. Maybe she wants to get rid of me and focus on herself. Maybe start dating again, just be free.

 

What 30 year old university educated Issan white-collar faux CEO mother gives up two small children so easily without a fight? I was expecting a lengthy court battle. The only thing I am interested is in the 2 kids, nothing else.

 

I am just shocked she is going to hand them on a platter, sign them both away to me. 

 

What the <deleted> is going on here? she's flipped the script on me. I was expecting to have to pay for both kids. She is giving them away FOR FREE.

 

Legally get sole custody of the kids in exchange for divorce.

 

 

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1 hour ago, OzFlyer said:

what do you mean?

Make a deal with your wife that you get sole custody of the kids in exchange for 50 or 100K baht.

 

Legal paperwork

 

Take the kids with you and she will never see them.

 

 

 

 

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7 hours ago, bwpage3 said:

Make a deal with your wife that you get sole custody of the kids in exchange for 50 or 100K baht.

 

Legal paperwork

 

Take the kids with you and she will never see them.

 

 

 

 

She is giving them away for free. Eager to sign the paper at the amphur, wants the paperwork now and she's ready to put pen to paper and give them up.

 

Said her mum can't handle it anymore in Issan looking after our 2 kids and not getting paid. She didn't mention anything about herself being able to look after kids though? Why can't she take them to bangkok as a "successful" business person, put them in child care, get a nanny etc.  If she has a new partner why don't they look after the kids presuming he is a "rich" farang? What mother gives up her kids so easily?

 

I feel the real story is that she has so much debt but still wants a single life with no responsibility beyond paying her debts. What percentage of thai mothers give their kids to the other half for free and without a fight, particularly a farang man? 

 

I expected her to play hard ball and at least offer to sell them both. She tried selling the youngest about a month ago and I knocked it back. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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12 hours ago, OzFlyer said:

She is giving them away for free. Eager to sign the paper at the amphur, wants the paperwork now and she's ready to put pen to paper and give them up.

 

Said her mum can't handle it anymore in Issan looking after our 2 kids and not getting paid. She didn't mention anything about herself being able to look after kids though? Why can't she take them to bangkok as a "successful" business person, put them in child care, get a nanny etc.  If she has a new partner why don't they look after the kids presuming he is a "rich" farang? What mother gives up her kids so easily?

 

I feel the real story is that she has so much debt but still wants a single life with no responsibility beyond paying her debts. What percentage of thai mothers give their kids to the other half for free and without a fight, particularly a farang man? 

 

I expected her to play hard ball and at least offer to sell them both. She tried selling the youngest about a month ago and I knocked it back. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

You need to change your mindset from your hatred of her to the salvation of your innocent kids.

 

Your kids should be the most important thing in the world to you, not her problems.

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  • 1 month later...
On 7/5/2019 at 2:55 PM, Caledonia Boy said:

"Am I just another ATM"?

I'd like to ask the audience. 

Seems to me she is just after your money. Kids are a problem I agree. My understanding is that because she lived in Australia she can take legal action there to get half of your remaining assets.

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On 8/30/2020 at 5:12 AM, OzMan said:

Seems to me she is just after your money. Kids are a problem I agree. My understanding is that because she lived in Australia she can take legal action there to get half of your remaining assets.

Latest update:

*Formally charged by the police for 6 counts of cheque fraud and referred to public prosecutor
*Surrendered to police on last day. Couldn't afford to pay for bail money so got a relative to submit their land title as security. Currently out on bail

*Prosecutor completing their investigation as per the 48-84 day window under Thai Criminal Law Code

*Arraignment date will be set in late October or early November  

*Police already seized passport so cannot travel.

*Investors will soon begin proceedings in the civil court to bankrupt her so she's in trouble in both the criminal and civil court

 

Right now she is in hiding somewhere in BKK and has switched off all social media. 

 

I sure picked a good one ! Just need to get my kids out of there as soon as I can and everything else will take care of itself.

 

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On 7/28/2020 at 8:04 AM, OzFlyer said:

What percentage of thai mothers give their kids to the other half for free and without a fight, particularly a farang man? 

It's always seemed fairly common to me.

Kids here don't get you welfare, so the women are less likely to want them.

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27 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

It's always seemed fairly common to me.

Kids here don't get you welfare, so the women are less likely to want them.

At this stage she is giving them both to me but that can easily change as the walls close in and she wants to play hardball, which would be increasingly difficult for her as the walls close in. Her legal position gets weaker by the day. Hasn't been paying wages to her staff either and the last I heard she has 6 complaints already filed to the labor department.

 

I told her she won't be getting 1 baht for them. I am going to look after them for the rest of their lives and don't need anything from her except to get the hell away from both of them.

 

As you said before, if they see the kids as liabilities and not assets they are less inclined to want them. That's fine by me !

 

 

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How will you get the kids to Thailand?

 

Ignoring the current issues amid the CV19 pandemic, will you have to fly to Thailand to pick them up or can you arrange for them to travel on their own and you collect them on arrival? (not sure if airlines allow this or whether they will insist that the 2 kids travel with an adult/guardian).

 

Good Luck, can't be easy being away from your kids for so long without all the added Ex drama ontop... 

 

 

 

 

 

  

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3 hours ago, Mike Teavee said:

How will you get the kids to Thailand?

 

Ignoring the current issues amid the CV19 pandemic, will you have to fly to Thailand to pick them up or can you arrange for them to travel on their own and you collect them on arrival? (not sure if airlines allow this or whether they will insist that the 2 kids travel with an adult/guardian).

 

Good Luck, can't be easy being away from your kids for so long without all the added Ex drama ontop... 

 

 

 

 

 

  

Yes it is a waiting game and it is difficult being away but I had to get out of there as it was getting dangerous. I have to fly back, get divorced and take them back to Oz. There's a few steps involved but in time it will be resolved. The kids are still very young (just turned 2 and 4) which makes it easier. Her mum is looking after them and she's good with the kids. How the daughter went off the rails down the criminal path is anyone's guess. 

 

 

 

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