Getting Personal

[jingjai9]

I meet many Thai women socially and on social media. One thing that baffles me is that in general, and I know generalities can be dangerous, many Thai women speak to me, know me, joke with me, but they never call me by my name or even ask my name. The less educated people will call me, "you". The ladies do not ask many personal questions, and I mean polite, not nosey questions. Thai men seem to be more open and inquisitive.

 

I would like to know if anyone else has made similar observatons. I am talking about women from all walks of life. For men with a Thai wife or girlfriend, what has been your experience? I know some women ask many, many questions because they are jealous and look for their man being unfaithful. Perhaps it all boils down to language ability and lack of confidence in articulating their thoughts. Not sure at all.

 

[Mikisteel]

Change your name to you.

 

Problem solved.

[malt25]

I was 8 years old before I realised my name wasn't "hey you".

[colinneil]

jingjai9 dont worry about it, been married 8 years never heard my wife call me by my name.

Many times she calls me dear, many times she calls me names i cannot post on here.????????????

[bluesofa]

2 minutes ago, colinneil said:

jingjai9 dont worry about it, been married 8 years never heard my wife call me by my name.

Many times she calls me dear, many times she calls me names i cannot post on here.????????????

"Yer great tub o' lard" wouldn't get deleted would it? Ha ha! ????

[Yinn]

37 minutes ago, Mikisteel said:

Change your name to you.

 

Problem solved.

Thai people who know a little English say “you” are try to be polite.

“Khun” = you, or Mr or Miss or Mrs 

 Khun  Mikisteel= Mr Mikisteel 

 

They think it polite to say. Like calling you Mr. .

They don’t want to rude, they try to be polite.

Maybe they learn at school English little bit, but not have experience talk with foreigner before.

[neeray]

My experience has been the exact opposite of yours. They nearly all ask me my name first off.

 

But your last sentence pretty much nails it no matter what language they speak (Perhaps it all boils down to language ability and lack of confidence in articulating their thoughts.)

[ianezy0]

Maybe it’s because you meet them on social media. You are just a screen to them. Strange though if you are not asked your name in a bar. I almost always am asked my name. But then again I am extremely good looking and overtly rich where 1000baht notes are falling from my pockets ????

[bluesofa]

13 minutes ago, Yinn said:

Thai people who know a little English say “you” are try to be polite.

“Khun” = you, or Mr or Miss or Mrs 

 Khun  Mikisteel= Mr Mikisteel 

 

They think it polite to say. Like calling you Mr. .

They don’t want to rude, they try to be polite.

Maybe they learn at school English little bit, but not have experience talk with foreigner before.

That's an interesting point Yinn. I'd never thought of it like that.

If it's in a sentence while someone is talking to you, that's fine.

However, I find it annoying if I'm out walking and someone tries to attract my attention by shout "You!" at me. Obviously being English that seems quite rude.

[PatOngo]

My wife calls me tirak with a flat tone unless she wants something, then it changes to a soft  sweet rising tone.

[BritManToo]

1 hour ago, jingjai9 said:

The less educated people will call me, "you".

So you're not white then?

[transam]

4 minutes ago, bluesofa said:

That's an interesting point Yinn. I'd never thought of it like that.

If it's in a sentence while someone is talking to you, that's fine.

However, I find it annoying if I'm out walking and someone tries to attract my attention by shout "You!" at me. Obviously being English that seems quite rude.

I had a Norwegian bloke once shout out..."Hey you".....I ignored him...Plus I cannot deal with drunks...

[White Christmas13]

6 minutes ago, transam said:

I had a Norwegian bloke once shout out..."Hey you".....I ignored him...Plus I cannot deal with drunks...

if you ignored him how do you know he was Norwegian

[bluesofa]

Just now, White Christmas13 said:

if you ignored him how do you know he was Norwegian

Tattooed on the back of the neck.

 

[NCC1701A]

1 hour ago, jingjai9 said:

The ladies do not ask many personal questions,

really? that is all i get. where you from? you married? girlfriend? how long you live in Thailand? what is your job? retired, what is that? how you make money? why don't you have girlfriend? are you going back to USA? on and on.

 

almost the same questions from women on social media like they are reading a script.

[bluesofa]

5 minutes ago, NCC1701A said:

really? that is all i get. where you from? you married? girlfriend? how long you live in Thailand? what is your job? retired, what is that? how you make money? why don't you have girlfriend? are you going back to USA? on and on.

 

almost the same questions from women on social media like they are reading a script.

Must all be ex-callgirl centre staff.

[OneMoreFarang]

Personally I often don't ask people about their names because likely I forget them. At least if I never ask it's not unpolite that I forgot their names.

 

About asking questions: I.e. yesterday I was at a company opening party and some Thai guys asked me what I like most about Thailand (the girls) and how long I am already here, etc. Just small talk.

There was also a cute girl at that party and she didn't ask these questions. And if she would have asked them then I would have gotten the idea that she is interested in more than just small talk. I guess that's the reason why she and many others, don't ask these kind of questions. They want to avoid that the guy gets ideas he shouldn't get.

[ThaiBunny]

34 minutes ago, ianezy0 said:

Strange though if you are not asked your name in a bar.

Isn't it the first of the standard set of questions?

1. What your name?
2. Where you come from?
3. How long to be in Thailand?
4. You come alone?
5. Where you stay?
6. Can I go there wit' you?

[transam]

35 minutes ago, White Christmas13 said:

if you ignored him how do you know he was Norwegian

Goes in a bar I sometimes frequent....????

[somtumwrong]

37 minutes ago, White Christmas13 said:

if you ignored him how do you know he was Norwegian

They all look like Thor and smell like fish.

[Olmate]

44 minutes ago, transam said:

I had a Norwegian bloke once shout out..."Hey you".....I ignored him...Plus I cannot deal with drunks...

I had a dog called Hey You

[SteveK]

I had a conversation with my wife only yesterday about Thai names, and how nobody in Thailand knows the real names of their friends or colleagues. Her friends are called things like Pla, Nok or even Man City - she doesn't know their real names even of the friends she shared an apartment with once! It must be a nightmare for the police, how do they ever solve anything? 

 

I know for a fact that my wife doesn't know my full name, she only ever calls me Ouan unless she needs money for something and then it's Teerak. In the first few months of living here everyone used to call me "you" until I asked my wife to explain that that is quite rude and it seems to have stopped, some of the older members of my wife's family use a more Thai-sounding version of my first name.

[VocalNeal]

Anyone familiar with Hash names? There is a guy in Vancouver called Sheep Shagger and his father's name is Ewe <deleted>. 

 

So walking along a road one day and I see dad on his bike on the other-side of the road. "Hey Ewe <deleted>" I shout. He looked over and waved. Much to the surprise of all the other pedestrians. 

 

Edit: His name is not Ewe <deleted> it begins with F and ends with R. Despicable how  auto correctness can ruin a joke.

 

 

[somtumwrong]

11 minutes ago, SteveK said:

I had a conversation with my wife only yesterday about Thai names, and how nobody in Thailand knows the real names of their friends or colleagues. Her friends are called things like Pla, Nok or even Man City - she doesn't know their real names even of the friends she shared an apartment with once! It must be a nightmare for the police, how do they ever solve anything? 

 

I know for a fact that my wife doesn't know my full name, she only ever calls me Ouan unless she needs money for something and then it's Teerak. In the first few months of living here everyone used to call me "you" until I asked my wife to explain that that is quite rude and it seems to have stopped, some of the older members of my wife's family use a more Thai-sounding version of my first name.

Ouan? You must be at an advanced level. I'm just called Pumpui by my wife, or hon. Or moo daeng. If she talks to a third person she says Khun .. and my name. Teerak feels funny as it's boyfriend, as I understand. I'm past that stage already, locked and chained ???? Pla for a girl sounds too fishy for me.

 

At the airport I register myself for the free internet (' please provide your name, passport number, email') as Ahmed SheepFuqqr. Nobody seems to care as I login month after month and the service keeps greeting me 'Welcome back Mr. SheepFuqqr.'

[BritManToo]

1 minute ago, somtumwrong said:

Teerak feels funny as it's boyfriend, as I understand.

You understand wrong, tee Rak = 'one I love' or 'my love'

[Dumbastheycome]

1 hour ago, Yinn said:

Thai people who know a little English say “you” are try to be polite.

“Khun” = you, or Mr or Miss or Mrs 

 Khun  Mikisteel= Mr Mikisteel 

 

They think it polite to say. Like calling you Mr. .

They don’t want to rude, they try to be polite.

Maybe they learn at school English little bit, but not have experience talk with foreigner before.

I understand what you explain .

It is unfortunate that many feel it offensive because so many Thai say "you" in a tone that often sounds challenging or aggressive or accusing but not meant that way.

Khun Pee  being " you you" especially so. It took me a long time to accept that as just a limitation of how Thai use their understanding of English in directly engaging someone in conversation or attention.

Thinking about it I can't think of an easy way to avoid it in casual conversation or  introduction without resorting to using much more complicated  "formal" English which most have never or will learn.

 

 

[holy cow cm]

I call a lot of people " How are you?" because I'm terrible with names.

[OneMoreFarang]

18 minutes ago, SteveK said:

I had a conversation with my wife only yesterday about Thai names, and how nobody in Thailand knows the real names of their friends or colleagues. Her friends are called things like Pla, Nok or even Man City - she doesn't know their real names even of the friends she shared an apartment with once! It must be a nightmare for the police, how do they ever solve anything? 

It's even worse than that. Many have different name with different people. Maybe a girl is called Noi in the office and Nit by her husband and Nui or whatever in her home village...

[GarryP]

9 minutes ago, OneMoreFarang said:

It's even worse than that. Many have different name with different people. Maybe a girl is called Noi in the office and Nit by her husband and Nui or whatever in her home village...

My wife changed her name a few years before I met her and started using a new nickname then. I did not realize that she had also changed her nick name until I visited her hometown. Everyone was referring to her as Nit and I was confused for a while as to who they were talking about. I then confused everyone even more by referring to her using her current nickname. 

 

Changing names is quite common in Thailand, and they also seem to change their nicknames at the same time.  

[bkk6060]

They call me Mr. BC.

Figure it out..:)