swissie Posted October 10, 2019 Share Posted October 10, 2019 Sad news for me today. During my days "in the sticks" in Thailand I had 5 Farangs that I called Friends. The last of them has died 2 days ago at the age of 78. All others have died before, between the ages of 62 and 66. He was diagnosed with throath cancer some 2 years ago. Now leaving behind his Thai-Wife of 32 years. He was aware that his much younger wife maintained an "active life style". He accepted that, never complaining. Upon having diagnosed with cancer, he refused to undergo expensive "western medical/hospital" treatement from day one. At that time, he explained to me that he would not "spend money on a hopeless cause" and eventually leave his wife pennieless. (no health insurance). He mentioned, that his wife gave him the best years of his life. Him only accepting low-cost Thai-Traditional medicine in form of certain herbes. Not having depleted his financial assets to prolong his life for a few months to the massive disadvantage of his wife of 32 years. To me, a true "Officer and a Gentleman" has passed away. Some say it is a dying breed. As sad as I am, I take solace in the fact that I had the privilege to have him as a friend. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CharlieH Posted October 10, 2019 Share Posted October 10, 2019 Sorry for your loss swissie. I have had similar and know the feeling, good friends are hard to find and upsetting when they leave. It's an unfortunate and very sad part of getting older that those around us and those we grew up with knowing start to disappear one by one, until of course it's our turn. If I had a similar issue I wouldn't bother either, it's more about quality of life than quantity in my book. As long as it was relatively pain free, what will be, will be and I wouldn't throw money at it either. Condolences. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
faraday Posted October 10, 2019 Share Posted October 10, 2019 Oh Swissie, I am so sorry for your loss, truly. Throughout my life, & especially over the last few years, I have lost my parents, & some close relatives. Yes, it's a sad time, but after a while, it becomes distant I hope that when I'm on that path, I just have enough Morphine analgesia. I wouldn't want to throw my money, away to extend my life, when the quality of it, would be poor. Think of the good times. ???? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
yosib157 Posted October 11, 2019 Share Posted October 11, 2019 Unfortunately, truth is a rare commodity out here meaning there must be thousands of us in the same postion as this, but rare for someone to write about it. I have 2 potentially fatal diseases and constant pain from knee injuries. I have medication for the two but these prohibit me from taking anything for my knees. Mainly by choice, and the many who have passed, my contact with foreigners is now negligible. Fortunately I have one friend who I trust and will take care of the wife's paperwork/finances when I'm gone. With the constant changes, and it will be impossible for me at 71 to procure health insurance, when things become unbearable, I'll just stop taking the meds and slowly slip away. Definitely not looking for sympathy or empathy here, just being realistic. My wife lost her Dad earlier this year and spends hours taking care of me so I really want her to be comfortable after I've gone so why waste money on a lost cause-- echoing previous comments. I'm not being maudling here as we still take many holidays together, but careful most of the time restricting other previously expensive pastimes. I'm making the best of my remaining time with the person I want to be with. It's what I have chosen to do and enjoying life while I can........................... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CharlieH Posted October 11, 2019 Share Posted October 11, 2019 "I'm making the best of my remaining time with the person I want to be with. It's what I have chosen to do and enjoying life while I can......." That just about says it for most of us I think. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NanLaew Posted October 11, 2019 Share Posted October 11, 2019 May the OP's friend rest in peace. An American friend of mine faced with similar choices about 8 years ago took his life by gunshot rather than burden and impoverish his life's partner. Respect. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DJ54 Posted October 11, 2019 Share Posted October 11, 2019 R.i.P. savor the memories.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
elliss Posted October 15, 2019 Share Posted October 15, 2019 How to cope with old age . How to come to terms with the realisation , that your life is near completion , not negotiable . When , you decide , that you do not want the burden of life anymore , so tired .. No more expensive medical bills , I will leave my money , it to my thai partner , and her son. Give him a chance to achieve , education , that is now , my main purpose in life .. Swissie , thank you for your post , life is so short .. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CLS Posted October 15, 2019 Share Posted October 15, 2019 Kopf hoch Swissie. Your buddy was a sensible guy without any selfish attitudes. Really rare nowadays. Keep him in good memory, he deserves it.Sent from my iPhone using Thaivisa Connect Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sirineou Posted October 15, 2019 Share Posted October 15, 2019 Sorry for your loss swissie, I only hope I have the courage and the dignity your friend had to act the same way when my time comes. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beautifulthailand99 Posted October 17, 2019 Share Posted October 17, 2019 On 10/15/2019 at 6:15 PM, elliss said: How to cope with old age . How to come to terms with the realisation , that your life is near completion , not negotiable . When , you decide , that you do not want the burden of life anymore , so tired .. No more expensive medical bills , I will leave my money , it to my thai partner , and her son. Give him a chance to achieve , education , that is now , my main purpose in life .. Swissie , thank you for your post , life is so short .. Your legacy will live on in their hearts and condolences to Swissie at your loss of what sounds like a truly honourable man. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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