Popular Post Formaleins Posted November 14, 2020 Popular Post Share Posted November 14, 2020 What would you do? Been here for over 15 years, I have a 19 year old boy that needs a bit of support, he has a job and in general takes care of himself, needs a motorbike for work, I keep him fed as Thai wages are not fantastic, don't ask for board and lodging, after all he is my responsibility. However, and here comes the reason for the post - My Thai wife for whatever reason (has a <deleted> son from previous sex) who is now 40 or older, he is married / living with a Thai lady of similar age, 40+ Recently, they seem to think it is a good idea to come to our home every night at 8 or 9 pm and have dinner. The food is the usual Northern Thai slop, the slight amount of meat is bought by them, however, all of the gas, electric, spices, oils etc. is at my expense....What would be the best way to tell them to pay up or <deleted> Off? I am getting old, long in the tooth, limited income, I support my Son, Wife and myself, but there is no way I am feeding two other 40 year old spoiled brats that cannot feed themselves. best way forward, least confrontation, I don't really want to shoot them.....but you never know! 2 4 1 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post IraqRon Posted November 14, 2020 Popular Post Share Posted November 14, 2020 Christ man, you are a stingy one for sure/. they bring some meat and your wife cooks it and you bemoan the cost of gas, oil, spices, etc. Maybe their lively hood has been affected by the cv19 crisis and are doing the best they can. Also your statement that northern thai food is slop and your wife is a .... as well as her son a ... is very telling. Oh yes, you give your son some help, what a guy. Disgusted by your diatribes. What are you doing in this culture? 26 1 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post worgeordie Posted November 14, 2020 Popular Post Share Posted November 14, 2020 Shoot them, but just in the knee's ,it's the only way to get the message across you don't want them coming ,good luck. regards worgeordie 2 1 9 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Formaleins Posted November 14, 2020 Author Share Posted November 14, 2020 I Think you must be my wife! (It is not the fact of them using resources, but they cook everything and eat it themselves, there is nothing left for my son or anyone else, and they takeaway whatever is left! They live with my wifes mother for free, sponge off her (she is 80+ and they like the smell of the 2 million Baht she got from a land sale....no, these people are leeches! 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dumbastheycome Posted November 14, 2020 Share Posted November 14, 2020 5 minutes ago, Formaleins said: What would you do? Been here for over 15 years, I have a 19 year old boy that needs a bit of support, he has a job and in general takes care of himself, needs a motorbike for work, I keep him fed as Thai wages are not fantastic, don't ask for board and lodging, after all he is my responsibility. However, and here comes the reason for the post - My Thai wife for whatever reason (has a <deleted> son from previous sex) who is now 40 or older, he is married / living with a Thai lady of similar age, 40+ Recently, they seem to think it is a good idea to come to our home every night at 8 or 9 pm and have dinner. The food is the usual Northern Thai slop, the slight amount of meat is bought by them, however, all of the gas, electric, spices, oils etc. is at my expense....What would be the best way to tell them to pay up or <deleted> Off? I am getting old, long in the tooth, limited income, I support my Son, Wife and myself, but there is no way I am feeding two other 40 year old spoiled brats that cannot feed themselves. best way forward, least confrontation, I don't really want to shoot them.....but you never know! Importantly in your desire to curtail what you find is a problem is to establish what your Thai wife's thoughts are. With you or against or indifferent (maybe) ? Ultimately the gas, the spices, oil etc could often be depleted awaiting replenishment (tomorrow or tomorrow or tomorrow). The difficulty is that they bring a component of a meal which to them may seem justification. Good luck ! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Formaleins Posted November 14, 2020 Author Share Posted November 14, 2020 1 minute ago, worgeordie said: Shoot them, but just in the knee's ,it's the only way to get the message across you don't want them coming ,good luck. regards worgeordie Love that one mate, shooting them in the head would do no damage 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post Lacessit Posted November 14, 2020 Popular Post Share Posted November 14, 2020 The family unit is everything to Thais. If you don't understand that after 15 years here, you are a slow learner. No doubt you expect your wife and son to look after you when you are no longer able to do so yourself. That's what the family unit in Thailand is about. 17 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post Dumbastheycome Posted November 14, 2020 Popular Post Share Posted November 14, 2020 1 minute ago, Formaleins said: I Think you must be my wife! (It is not the fact of them using resources, but they cook everything and eat it themselves, there is nothing left for my son or anyone else, and they takeaway whatever is left! They live with my wifes mother for free, sponge off her (she is 80+ and they like the smell of the 2 million Baht she got from a land sale....no, these people are leeches! Aha ! Now you reveal a different aspect. But .... clean the gun ! 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Formaleins Posted November 14, 2020 Author Share Posted November 14, 2020 1 minute ago, Dumbastheycome said: Importantly in your desire to curtail what you find is a problem is to establish what your Thai wife's thoughts are. With you or against or indifferent (maybe) ? Ultimately the gas, the spices, oil etc could often be depleted awaiting replenishment (tomorrow or tomorrow or tomorrow). The difficulty is that they bring a component of a meal which to them may seem justification. Good luck ! They would starve to death or cook on charcoal or dead babies rather than pay 500 Baht for a tank of gas! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post Formaleins Posted November 14, 2020 Author Popular Post Share Posted November 14, 2020 (edited) 3 minutes ago, Lacessit said: The family unit is everything to Thais. If you don't understand that after 15 years here, you are a slow learner. No doubt you expect your wife and son to look after you when you are no longer able to do so yourself. That's what the family unit in Thailand is about. You have to be kidding, the only thing a Thai would do is pay for the funeral and keep the proceeds! They have no loyalty to anyone other than money. Edited November 14, 2020 by Formaleins 3 1 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Formaleins Posted November 14, 2020 Author Share Posted November 14, 2020 2 minutes ago, Dumbastheycome said: Aha ! Now you reveal a different aspect. But .... clean the gun ! Spick and span, oiled every day. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post AlexRich Posted November 14, 2020 Popular Post Share Posted November 14, 2020 It doesn’t sound like something you should get too worked up about. If they are decent people and you get on well with them then let it go. Unless of course it is a major drain on your resources, but I’m not sure it is? Your priority quite correctly is your own son. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post Dumbastheycome Posted November 14, 2020 Popular Post Share Posted November 14, 2020 1 minute ago, Formaleins said: You have to be kidding, the only thin a Thai would do is pay for the funeral and keep the proceeds! They have no loyalty to anyone other than money. Not altogether true. As within any nationality and culture the people in are equally as diverse in nature. AS is the reaction of those exposed to the effect which at times may elicit objection in excess of rationalization. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post Lacessit Posted November 14, 2020 Popular Post Share Posted November 14, 2020 1 minute ago, Formaleins said: You have to be kidding, the only thin a Thai would do is pay for the funeral and keep the proceeds! They have no loyalty to anyone other than money. If it's such a problem to you, cut off the money or supply of goods. A gas cylinder can always be empty when they come calling. I'd advise talking to your wife first, though. My GF has loyalty to me, she prays every night to Buddha for a long life for me. That's because she knows when I cark it, the monthly flow of money will end. So she will do her best to keep me alive. 4 12 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Formaleins Posted November 14, 2020 Author Share Posted November 14, 2020 4 minutes ago, AlexRich said: It doesn’t sound like something you should get too worked up about. If they are decent people and you get on well with them then let it go. Unless of course it is a major drain on your resources, but I’m not sure it is? Your priority quite correctly is your own son. It is the give an inch take a mile! Would you do it? Seriously, would you turn up at your mothers house every night, with your wife and expect your mother to cook for a 40 year old couple at your expense? whilst trying to support your own family? Feeding 5? Sorry but I am not some food Charity! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Formaleins Posted November 14, 2020 Author Share Posted November 14, 2020 7 minutes ago, Lacessit said: If it's such a problem to you, cut off the money or supply of goods. A gas cylinder can always be empty when they come calling. I'd advise talking to your wife first, though. My GF has loyalty to me, she prays every night to Buddha for a long life for me. That's because she knows when I cark it, the monthly flow of money will end. So she will do her best to keep me alive. Good philosophy, the God of Thailand is MONEY! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post swissie Posted November 14, 2020 Popular Post Share Posted November 14, 2020 52 minutes ago, Formaleins said: What would you do? Been here for over 15 years, I have a 19 year old boy that needs a bit of support, he has a job and in general takes care of himself, needs a motorbike for work, I keep him fed as Thai wages are not fantastic, don't ask for board and lodging, after all he is my responsibility. However, and here comes the reason for the post - My Thai wife for whatever reason (has a <deleted> son from previous sex) who is now 40 or older, he is married / living with a Thai lady of similar age, 40+ Recently, they seem to think it is a good idea to come to our home every night at 8 or 9 pm and have dinner. The food is the usual Northern Thai slop, the slight amount of meat is bought by them, however, all of the gas, electric, spices, oils etc. is at my expense....What would be the best way to tell them to pay up or <deleted> Off? I am getting old, long in the tooth, limited income, I support my Son, Wife and myself, but there is no way I am feeding two other 40 year old spoiled brats that cannot feed themselves. best way forward, least confrontation, I don't really want to shoot them.....but you never know! Tell 'em that you are thrilled to see them everyday. Tell 'em that deep in your heart you are a family man. Then tell 'em that you incurred some massive gambling losses recently and the mafia is on your tail. Ask them if they could help you out with a monthly contribution to help pay off the gambling debt. Chances are, you won't see 'em again for the next 20 years. 1 1 10 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post 2long Posted November 14, 2020 Popular Post Share Posted November 14, 2020 15 years Must be 60+ Troll alert, says I 1 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post kingofthemountain Posted November 14, 2020 Popular Post Share Posted November 14, 2020 1 hour ago, Formaleins said: They would starve to death or cook on charcoal or dead babies rather than pay 500 Baht for a tank of gas! Honestly you seem to be on the same mindset moaning for some gas and oil (WE are talking about 200\300 bahts a month right?) to help your family (Yes, even if its your wife's son, it's now your family maybe something you wasn't aware of when you have decided to marry her?) i wonder how have you even managed to stay in Thailand for so long if you don't have the minimal financial requirments to stay here and having a decent life. What would happen if your wife, or yourself, or your legit son had a medical problem with a huge amount of money to throw away? Do you plan a go fund me? 2 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post kingofthemountain Posted November 14, 2020 Popular Post Share Posted November 14, 2020 41 minutes ago, 2long said: 15 years Must be 60+ Troll alert, says I I hope it's a troll if not, it's sad, really sad 4 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post uncleP Posted November 14, 2020 Popular Post Share Posted November 14, 2020 You could actually start taking your wife and son out to eat. ???? 2 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
1FinickyOne Posted November 14, 2020 Share Posted November 14, 2020 1 hour ago, Lacessit said: That's because she knows when I cark it, the monthly flow of money will end you have not provided her w/any savings and security for after your passing? and you boast of your 'good taking care?' 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post kingofthemountain Posted November 14, 2020 Popular Post Share Posted November 14, 2020 1 hour ago, Lacessit said: My GF has loyalty to me, she prays every night to Buddha for a long life for me. That's because she knows when I cark it, the monthly flow of money will end. So she will do her best to keep me alive. i am always surprised by the love leading most of the farang\thais couples 2 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kingofthemountain Posted November 14, 2020 Share Posted November 14, 2020 (edited) 2 hours ago, Formaleins said: Recently, they seem to think it is a good idea to come to our home every night at 8 or 9 pm and have dinner. Who is the owner of the land and the house? (I mean on the oficial documents, i don't ask who paid for it) If your wife is the owner, you have nothing to say in the matter she is legaly in her house (Whatever you think about it) and she can invite who she wants, and even put you and your son outside if you make problems. If you rent and if the contract is in your name, we can discuss your problem Edited November 14, 2020 by kingofthemountain 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post Airalee Posted November 14, 2020 Popular Post Share Posted November 14, 2020 Dude...it’s food. 3 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post teacherclaire Posted November 14, 2020 Popular Post Share Posted November 14, 2020 (edited) The food is the usual Northern Thai slop, the slight amount of meat is bought by them, however, all of the gas, electric, spices, oils etc. is at my expense.. God, your post made me very sad. Gas, electric, spices, oils.........that's almost nothing and Thai people try to help their family members and so should you. They pay for the meat, don't you eat with them from time to time? Too many people have lost their jobs and that might be one of the the reasons why they come to you. Is that really so hard to understand? If the answer is yes, please move back home wherever you came from. If you can't discuss that with your wife then you're already in a lost battle. You should address the problem to her, not on an open forum. You wanted an answer, please try to understand my points. I've been here almost 20 years in a healthy relationship. Their family is very important and nI think that's okay. Edited November 14, 2020 by teacherclaire MFUT Make Foreigners Understand Thailand 3 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
teacherclaire Posted November 14, 2020 Share Posted November 14, 2020 44 minutes ago, kingofthemountain said: i am always surprised by the love leading most of the farang\thais couples She' might pray but more for her and her beloved ones. If the OP continues acting so weird, she'll hatte him more and more. And the end is near. And the end is well known all over TVF......just read the posts of people who are single now and wish they hadn't done some cheap Charley stuff. 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post ThailandRyan Posted November 14, 2020 Popular Post Share Posted November 14, 2020 52 minutes ago, kingofthemountain said: I hope it's a troll if not, it's sad, really sad Problem is, even some of the Expats live hand to mouth and can not be bothered to live by the culture they have chosen to live within. Bar the door Katie, no one coming to eat at their place because they would not give the shirt off of their backs for anyone. 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
impulse Posted November 14, 2020 Share Posted November 14, 2020 Grab a plate, a fork and a spoon and join 'em. They're probably bringing the meat because they're concerned for you and his Mom, what with things so tight. Well, maybe just his Mom. You didn't marry just her. You married the family. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post daveAustin Posted November 14, 2020 Popular Post Share Posted November 14, 2020 Don't forget, Thais always let the most 'important/wealthiest' person pay (Thai or farang) as a mark of respect, so you should be thanking them. 1 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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