Do you think your changing as a person as you get older ?

[spidermike007]

11 hours ago, thaibeachlovers said:

I am still as judgemental and intolerant as I was at 20, but I learned that it doesn't pay to verbalise such sentiments to the wrong people. Does that mean I changed, or that I just learned?

Gaining wisdom is a positive change. Words can have the power of missiles. Sometimes things are better left unsaid. Just as sometimes the entire truth is not required. 

[sidjameson]

12 hours ago, spidermike007 said:

Gaining wisdom is a positive change. Words can have the power of missiles. Sometimes things are better left unsaid. Just as sometimes the entire truth is not required. 

Sometimes you prefer to not know the whole truth?

[spidermike007]

5 hours ago, sidjameson said:

Sometimes you prefer to not know the whole truth?

Absolutely, positively yes. Without a doubt. Truth can be deadly. Truth can be harmful. Truth is very often overrated, and some cultures like America are willing to destroy a relationship, break a heart, and devastate a soul, because "I had to get it off my chest". That is not truth. That is weakness, callousness, guilt, and cruelty. 

[unblocktheplanet]

Okay. But indifference is a curse. Helping people in need is a joy.

 

And don't care what others think, for sure.

[DerbyDan]

Your getting old and flexible.

Edited May 30, 2021 by DerbyDan

[ExpatOilWorker]

On 3/2/2021 at 12:02 AM, swissie said:

When yor "gyroscope" starts to point you in the direction of "where is the nearest Starbucks", you will know that your "gyroscope" will need "re-calibration".

You got me there!

I am reading this while sitting at Starbucks. 

[xylophone]

It is a "mixed bag" as I have gotten older, because in my younger years I was "all go and wanting to win everything" and had to be the best, and now I've managed to relax (don't ask me how) and am quite happy to wile the hours away on the laptop or just walking round the supermarket or shops doing nothing in particular, apart from looking out for wine bargains!

 

I have gotten angrier in some respects and although I never really suffered fools gladly earlier on, I certainly won't do it now, cutting ties with anybody who turns out to be an idiot in whatever respect.

 

I'm perfectly happy on my own although catching up with a friend or two on occasion is enjoyable, and I don't need a woman in my life, although I do have time for a couple of female friends.

 

Before this covid 19 hit I was quite happy to go out once or twice a week to a restaurant or Bangla and that was really it for me.

 

I travelled far and wide when I was younger working for oil companies, so travelling on aeroplanes is no longer the "joy" that it used to be, in fact now I consider it to be a pain.

 

Trying to sum this up: – retired and single and enjoying it; getting grumpier from time to time, and won't have anything to do with fools and idiots.

 

Just before I sign off, I have found myself being more generous in my old age and my unofficially adopted Thai daughter will be the beneficiary of a nice lump sum when I depart this mortal coil, as well as the fact I'm looking after her education now and have been for the last few years. Add to that the fact that I regularly hand out small sums of money to various Thai folk I see struggling here and never expect repayment or thanks, and I get satisfaction from the smile on their faces.

[thaibeachlovers]

16 hours ago, xylophone said:

Add to that the fact that I regularly hand out small sums of money to various Thai folk I see struggling here and never expect repayment or thanks, and I get satisfaction from the smile on their faces.

I handed out a substantial sum to my in laws for the MIL funeral as a loan. Not only did I not get it back, I got no expression of thanks or even a smile.

I guess it depends on who one is giving small sums ( or large ones ) to.

[ColeBOzbourne]

As I get older I find myself changing into my father. Some habits he had when I was young used to annoy me, and now I catch myself doing the exact same things. Currently he is 88 years old and more annoying than ever. Although I love him dearly, I fear that I can see what is on my own horizon destined to come.

[1FinickyOne]

On 3/4/2021 at 5:18 PM, sidjameson said:

Is there ever such a thing as an ex hooker?

 

hooker, ex-hooker and re-hooker...

 

an ex-hooker is one between customers

[1FinickyOne]

On 5/30/2021 at 4:12 PM, xylophone said:

I have found myself being more generous in my old age and my unofficially adopted Thai daughter will be the beneficiary of a nice lump sum when I depart this mortal coil, as well as the fact I'm looking after her education now and have been for the last few years. Add to that the fact that I regularly hand out small sums of money to various Thai folk I see struggling here and never expect repayment or thanks, and I get satisfaction from the smile on their faces.

yeah, me too..

[Dazinoz]

Curious as to why this post re-appeared in featured threads 3 months after original post. Must be running out of topics.

[tifino]

my ears are dim 

my legs are faded 

and my eyes are old and bent

[Tracyb]

We grow too soon old and too late smart!

[Excel]

Well quite well over 70 now and I have certainly changed. In my youth I used to be very impatient and intolerant.  Now b$$$er off asking stupid questions and quit wasting my time.

Edited June 1, 2021 by Excel

[Excel]

On 3/1/2021 at 9:18 PM, Natai Beach said:

I tried it once. I don’t recommend it. 

 

Hurt like buggery. 
 

 

That's the trouble with Lady boys, they think "one size fits all"  ????????

[Excel]

On 3/1/2021 at 9:18 PM, Natai Beach said:

I tried it once. I don’t recommend it. 

 

Hurt like buggery. 
 

 

That's the trouble with Lady boys, they think "one size fits all"  ????????

[moogradod]

Of course you do change. Everything does exept for your most subtle nature. That is why you do not really feel older over time. But your body clearly tells it is decaying, while your mind should notice you are getting wiser with all positively changed behaviour that this will bring with it and its notable influence on your surroundings. There will be a feedback if this all goes in the right direction or if you should think about some adjustments.

[Chosenfew]

It’s called Wisdom.

[Speedhump]

51 minutes ago, tifino said:

my ears are dim 

my legs are faded 

and my eyes are old and bent

Line on the left. 

[Pilotman]

Most definitely.  I am not remotely the same person as I was in my twenties and as each decade has passed I have changed, sometimes for the better ( education and learning), sometimes its been  not so good. I am much more suspicious and cynical than I ever was before.  I trust very few people and I can't stand stupidity in people or organisations and I just don't think much of the human race as a species. On the plus side, ironically given what I have just written, I am more sympathetic to the poor and disadvantaged and have great empathy for the plight of those less fortunate than I am or have been. My younger self would not recognise my older self. 

[Purdey]

I get more impatient with fools or anyone not trying to help make a better world. I know time is running out and I don't see the changes I expected to happen when I was young. Frustration and urgency are the main problems. Just can't do enough in the time available.

And I am a relaxed person by nature, just seeing the frustration bubbling up when someone says something really stupid. ????

[Lacessit]

I think I've got better at moving on from people who have disappointed me in various ways. Nowadays I value the good friends I have, and shun the oxygen thieves.

For sure, sexually I am nowhere near as active as 5 years ago. I still enjoy the physical intimacy with my Thai GF, whether we get to completion is not a big deal for both of us. We play a lot.

I haven't changed in terms of treading my own path. I've always had an inquiring mind.

I still enjoy being creative, currently making a series of sport videos. I've taught myself how to make and edit videos with a laptop, phone camera, 200 baht tripod, and software downloaded from the internet.

I'm 78.

 

 

[ChrisKC]

36 minutes ago, moogradod said:

Of course you do change. Everything does exept for your most subtle nature. That is why you do not really feel older over time. But your body clearly tells it is decaying, while your mind should notice you are getting wiser with all positively changed behaviour that this will bring with it and its notable influence on your surroundings. There will be a feedback if this all goes in the right direction or if you should think about some adjustments.

"should notice you are getting wiser"

 

If only that were true from the "collective of humanity" point of view. The great majority of people do not become wiser as they grow older even though I believe they should. Reality passes them by - you only have to think of those who remain steadfastly religious all their lives denying reality - they are certainly not wise.

[ChrisKC]

On 3/13/2021 at 10:30 AM, spidermike007 said:

Absolutely, positively yes. Without a doubt. Truth can be deadly. Truth can be harmful. Truth is very often overrated, and some cultures like America are willing to destroy a relationship, break a heart, and devastate a soul, because "I had to get it off my chest". That is not truth. That is weakness, callousness, guilt, and cruelty. 

The truth may hurt, but a later discovered truth previously concealed could double hurt! It depends on the person telling that truth and the one receiving it as to the potential dynamics of the consequences.

[jimn]

You keep coming back to ladyboys. Yes its ok you can have a ladyboy lover if you wish. No need to post about it in a roundabout way on ThaiVisa. Your name just about confirms it @georgegeorgia lol

Edited June 1, 2021 by jimn

[moogradod]

24 minutes ago, ChrisKC said:

"should notice you are getting wiser"

 

If only that were true from the "collective of humanity" point of view. The great majority of people do not become wiser as they grow older even though I believe they should. Reality passes them by - you only have to think of those who remain steadfastly religious all their lives denying reality - they are certainly not wise.

An extremely religious person once said: "Our heart and mind are our temple, kindness our philosophy". That easy. Dont you think that this is a wise statement ? There must not be a tradeoff between what you call "reality" and "religion", implying that materialism is superior and religion (whatever you personally think that is) just stupid and only "belief". Your actions determine if they are beneficial or not. This is what counts in the end.

Edited June 1, 2021 by moogradod

[ChrisKC]

 I stand by what I said. I say to the religious and its apologists:

 

"Be wise and keep it to yourself!"

 

This OP is not specially about religion so that is my lot on it!

Edited June 1, 2021 by ChrisKC

[khunPer]

On 3/1/2021 at 1:40 PM, georgegeorgia said:

I can't help to think as I'm going towards 60 how much I changed over the years .

You probably begin to reach the age where you legally can be a GOM, i.e. a Grumpy Old Man...????

 

However, we all change over time, some a little, others a lot.

 

BTW, I also once had a Thai girl friend that ripped me off – yes, "blue eyed" farang, and first timer in nightlife – I also had no deep feelings when she later contacted me again, after all she had been quite expensive compared with what I got back, so no feelings, but also no hard feeling, it was after all my own choice to give her money. However I was polite to her, even help her a little financially to move on, which she didn't even seemed specially happy with – I presume that she expected more – until she finally gave up, and told me that if I didn't want to give her money, there were no reason to be friends; cool enough for me, and I havn't seen her since; she's also an "old lady" now...????

 

I also don't mind keeping myself to myself, I actually enjoys it, but I'm also a tiny bit older than you, so perhaps I'm even more of a GOM...????

[spidermike007]

37 minutes ago, ChrisKC said:

The truth may hurt, but a later discovered truth previously concealed could double hurt! It depends on the person telling that truth and the one receiving it as to the potential dynamics of the consequences.

Yes, it depends. In America it is very common for men to feel guilt over an indiscretion. I have seen relationships ruined over the "guys need to get it off his chest". In reality, it is often a guilt brought on by a baked in "false puritanism" created by a warped sense of religion and spirituality. 

 

Often, guilt is NOT a healthy emotion, and often the need to confess is an incredibly selfish and unproductive notion.