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What happens to my child if I die? I dont want them going to the in-laws. Is there a legal instruction on this?


jack71

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The wife and I frequently have to do drive to Bkk for business whilst our child stays behind. If we are finished by a car accident, for example, what happens to our child? 

 

The worst situation is that my wifes parents will take her to live with them up country. I don't trust them or the wifes brothers. We recently visited them at songkran holidays and I was most unimpressed with their behavior yet again. 

 

Is there anything that can done legally to prevent this from happening. i.e. nominate the agreed person that I have in mind on the proviso that they agree to take her. Is there a legal document for this?

 

Many thanks

 

 

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8 minutes ago, jack71 said:

my wifes parents will take her to live with them up country. I don't trust them or the wifes brothers.

 

Is their sister/daughter really that different, when it comes down to it? They were raised and grew up in the exact same environment! 

 

11 minutes ago, jack71 said:

Is there anything that can done legally to prevent this from happening.

 

The Thai mother can take her child to live with them now and there is nothing you could do about it (in reality).

 

If you want to do something about it, move to West, then your Western family can raise her should something happen. Plus the education, culture and social benefits. Go home and take your kid with you if her mother allows. 

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16 hours ago, JeffersLos said:

Is their sister/daughter really that different, when it comes down to it? They were raised and grew up in the exact same environment!

My wife's sisters and brothers are very different than her. Environment has very little to do with how a person is.  Each person develops their own personality and morals. Two of my brothers were very Christian religious people.  Me, although I'm a believer, I've not been very religious. (for example)  We were all raised by a belt for discipline.  Two brothers used that method until they finally realized it wasn't working. I never did use a belt, switch, ruler, hair brush, etc.  One brother realized immediately that corporal punishment wasn't going to work and his children were the best (besides mine).

 

So, yes, there is a difference.

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18 hours ago, jack71 said:

Is there anything that can done legally to prevent this from happening. i.e. nominate the agreed person that I have in mind on the proviso that they agree to take her. Is there a legal document for this?

Make a will.?

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First of all, you and your wife should agree. You should have a talk with her .

 

You have someone else in mind, does that person know how or what?

Additional start having conversations with that person, if your wife agrees.

 

Then you have to make a will. Maybe the chosen person has to sign as well?.

Maybe the same lawyer as  a guardian for assets and money flow.?

To be sure, you will have to see a good lawyer about that, to make it work.

 

It's weird , i myself never thought about such a thing or did I, now i dont have to, as my kids are "grown".

But it is indeed something to consider, being parent.

Well in my case my wife then decided totally different and wanted, out of the blue, a divorce while they were 4 and 7.yo, which really messes up your life.  

In western world, you have godmothers and /or fathers and with that title, parents consider them as the follow up in line if anything would happen with them.

But to make it legally work, you will need agreements on all parties, a lawyer and a good will. 

 

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21 hours ago, JeffersLos said:

Is their sister/daughter really that different, when it comes down to it? They were raised and grew up in the exact same environment

 

Gosh, you could have 50 shades of <deleted> in one family, easily.

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21 hours ago, JeffersLos said:

If you want to do something about it, move to West, then your Western family can raise her should something happen. Plus the education, culture and social benefits. Go home and take your kid with you if her mother allows. 

 

There are good schools in Bangkok with good education, culture, and social values - and not international schools - Thai run schools.

 

The elite Thais do this better than the average western school.

 

Out in the jungles of Thailand though, not so much. Perish the thought. 

 

I'd try to have my kid board at school if I was gonna croak.

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20 minutes ago, ChaiyaTH said:

Nothing will happen you can worry about or influence, when no longer alive.

Thats why Im worrying now and trying to do the best for my daughter now... Anything is better for her than being sent to the creepy inlaws

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As has been said, the way to go about is to make a will. A judge will seriously consider what you and your wife want regarding your child should you die. A will can be made for almost nothing at the amphur, or you can see a lawyer.

 

If you have any assets it make even more sense to make a will. Land/house given or inherited to a minor is very difficult to sell. It requires permission of the courts to do so as long the child is still a minor (under 20 years of age). And they require that the guardian shows that it is in the interest of the child to do so.

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1 hour ago, Liverpool Lou said:

You both need to make wills and in them designate who is to be the guardian of your child.   That person then has to file with the  Central Juvenile and Family Court for custody.

so if we both pass on that person who we selected will have a copy of our Wills and can use that as evidence in the family court? If successful then my child can be rescued from the in laws one would presume?

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18 hours ago, jack71 said:
20 hours ago, Liverpool Lou said:

You both need to make wills and in them designate who is to be the guardian of your child.   That person then has to file with the  Central Juvenile and Family Court for custody.

so if we both pass on that person who we selected will have a copy of our Wills and can use that as evidence in the family court? If successful then my child can be rescued from the in laws one would presume?

They'll have a copy of the wills if you provide them, yes, and yes, it would be presented to the court.  When the court approves the guardianship the designated person becomes the child's guardian.

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