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Telephone's In China


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Perhaps you are a German ... sure to be with a nik like 'Wei' ... in that case you probably wouldn't understand humour. 

Sorry Harry, didn't know German has nick of Wei. And didn't know as well that Germans don't understand humour :o

Yeah, and this born and breed Chinese didn't understand your humour too. Sorry. :D

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Its understood but just not funny  :o

Wing and Wong are Chinese surnames, thats where the funny part should come in I supposed?  :D

We have an old saying in Engerland, 'You can please some of the people some of the time, but not all of the people all of the time' .... C'est la vie my Chinese friend ...

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:D Well Harry I just thought you would like to know that to the Chinese, the surname denotes the clan, dialect and even province their ancestors came from.

It is their link with their father, grandfather and forefathers for the past 4000 years. Like the name Wong or Wang most probably came from Canton where they speak Cantonese. Lim is Hokkien from Fujian and Goh Teochew from Swatow.

Never mess with a black man's boom box........

Hope you never mess with a chinese surname again..... :o

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Us Inglish have a similar tradition to that of out Chinese kinfolk way out there in Chinaland.

For example my real surname is 'Shufflebottom' & it is taken from part of the local topography in which my ancestors lived. 'Shufflebottom' (sheepfold bottom) would give an indication both of where the man lived and what his job was.

Other 'bottom' examples include ... 'Bottomley' (the clearing in the bottom of a valley) & 'Winterbottom' (a clearing protected from winter weather). :o

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I heard that Cameroon is celtic for "crooked nose" depicting a beautiful peninsula on a lake that looks just like that. And that Johnson is actually John's son just as williamson is William's son. :o Names tell alot about a persons history, no wonder the chinese place such emphasis on them.

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Us Inglish have a similar tradition to that of out Chinese kinfolk way out there in Chinaland.

For example my real surname is 'Shufflebottom' & it is taken from part of the local topography in which my ancestors lived. 'Shufflebottom' (sheepfold bottom) would give an indication both of where the man lived and what his job was.

Other 'bottom' examples include ... 'Bottomley' (the clearing in the bottom of a valley) & 'Winterbottom' (a clearing protected from winter weather).  :o

Whatever rhymes with banker ?

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Us Inglish have a similar tradition to that of out Chinese kinfolk way out there in Chinaland.

For example my real surname is 'Shufflebottom' & it is taken from part of the local topography in which my ancestors lived. 'Shufflebottom' (sheepfold bottom) would give an indication both of where the man lived and what his job was.

Other 'bottom' examples include ... 'Bottomley' (the clearing in the bottom of a valley) & 'Winterbottom' (a clearing protected from winter weather).  :D

Whatever rhymes with banker ?

I certainly suppose you are referring to "tanker" and are just about to start a new thread about the increased petrol prices, don't ya Doc? :o

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Us Inglish have a similar tradition to that of out Chinese kinfolk way out there in Chinaland.

For example my real surname is 'Shufflebottom' & it is taken from part of the local topography in which my ancestors lived. 'Shufflebottom' (sheepfold bottom) would give an indication both of where the man lived and what his job was.

Other 'bottom' examples include ... 'Bottomley' (the clearing in the bottom of a valley) & 'Winterbottom' (a clearing protected from winter weather).  :o

How about "Ramsbottom" ?

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I could never understand the surname Gotobed and where it came from.

Cant imagine a Lord in the 14th century saying to one of his surfs everyday "Will you GO TO BED"

Unlesss women had their own line of surnames then it would be quite understandable but the name should surely be

Gotobediwillbethereinaminute :o

Any ideas on this one

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Names tell alot about a persons history, no wonder the chinese place such emphasis on them.

What about Bavaria? One of the lads who recently played some football in the Euro is called Schweinsteiger.

Run it through a translating machine and you willo get 'mounter of the pig'.

Now what has that to do with football?

Perhaps with history, but we do not talk of what happened in the past.

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Us Inglish have a similar tradition to that of out Chinese kinfolk way out there in Chinaland.

For example my real surname is 'Shufflebottom' & it is taken from part of the local topography in which my ancestors lived. 'Shufflebottom' (sheepfold bottom) would give an indication both of where the man lived and what his job was.

Other 'bottom' examples include ... 'Bottomley' (the clearing in the bottom of a valley) & 'Winterbottom' (a clearing protected from winter weather).  :o

Whatever rhymes with banker ?

Right...and what rhymes with woofter...

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And now, to make this joke even less funny, a translation into Thai ...

They don't have terephone's in Thairand cause they might LING the LONG Number. :o

Or How about ...

A waitress walks up to one of her tables in a New York City restaurant and notices that the three Japanese businessmen seated there are furiously masturbating.

She yells, "What the ###### do you guys think you are doing?"

One of the Japanese men explains, "Can't you see? We are all berry hungry."

The waitress begs the question, "So, how is whacking-off in the middle of the restaurant going to help that situation?"

One of the other Japanese men replies, "The menu say,FIRST COME, FIRST SERVED!"

Or some English subtitles used in Chinese language films made in Hong Kong.

  • I am d@mn unsatisfied to be killed in this way.
  • Fatty, you with your thick face have hurt my instep.
  • Gun wounds again?
  • Same old rules: no eyes, no groin.
  • A normal person wouldn't steal pituitaries.
  • ######, I'll burn you into a BBQ chicken!
  • Take my advice, or I'll spank you without pants.
  • Who gave you the nerve to get killed here?
  • Quiet or I'll blow your throat up.
  • You always use violence. I should've ordered glutinous rice chicken.
  • I'll fire aimlessly if you don't come out!
  • You daring lousy guy.
  • Beat him out of recognizable shape!
  • I have been scared shitless too much lately.
  • I got knife scars more than the number of your leg's hair!
  • Beware! Your bones are going to be disconnected.
  • How can you use my intestines as a gift?
  • The bullets inside are very hot. Why do I feel so cold?

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