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Not Sure If I Have A Drinking Problem- Some Advice Needed


lucky2103

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I don't think that you need to be an alcoholic to drink too much. Many of my friends would be a little bit healthier if they drank a little less...

One problem that the OP should consider is whether continuous drinking in moderation will escalate...or whether there are any signs of that escalation.

FOr years, I thought I drank too much, but didn't worry about it too much. It was only when it got of control that I started to worry; maybe if I had cut down earlier, that would have happened later?

Ideally, after I'd paid off the mortgage and got the kids through school...

So my suggestion would be to cut down, and see how it feels. If it feels like a chore, then think again...

Try to get your friends used to you drinking soft drinks. Cry off going to the pub saying you are off to the gym. If the worst comes to the worst, you could even go to the gym...

SC

Well, I think the discussion is getting out of hand. im following the "2 bottles a day" rule and I dont feel any negative effect at all. I even abstain from drinking when I have some serious business the next day.

But from the view of the members of AA, Im an alcoholic...I hv yet to determine who is rght. That point of view may be right or not, Im not sure.

So if one gets drunk once a week, whats the problem about this ?

What's the point of drinking two bottles a day? WHy not either drink as many as you want, or save them all up for Saturday night and let your hair down?

I try to drink as many as I want - as many as I safely can. And that's nil. But I remember when I was a student, and we used to three days a week drink three pints (there was three of us buying rounds) before lab classes. I can't imagine that now - I can't imagine how I would get through a class after three pints, and I can't imagine how I would stop after three.

I'm not sure which one you are talking about with reference to getting drunk once a week. For me, the problem with getting drunk once a week is that I wake up in a strange short time hotel having spent many thousands of baht and I feel like shit until 5 pm two days later.

It sounds like you don't have a drink problem. But drink problems are like baobab trees; its better to deal with the seedlings than let them grow and flourish till they're too big to pull out.

Anyway, think I'll go and put the kettle on...

SC

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There is a very fine line between heavy drinking and alcoholism.

I have a 55 year old brother who gets drunk every night but he NEVER starts drinking before 6pm. His health is shot to pieces and he looks 10 years older than he is but I don’t believe he is an alcoholic because to some extent he can control his drinking.

Therein lays the difference. An alcoholic has lost all control over their drinking and they are on a slow downward spiral that is very difficult to recover from.

Only the affected person can determine if they are an alcoholic or not.

Wed 1 Jul 09, 7:20 pm

Hi Bobsyouruncle, all,

You raise some interesting issues here. "Alcoholisms" is probably more accurate than "alcoholism" in the singular. Ted Kennedy and a Skid Row bum are both alcoholics, both tragic in their own way, but obviously the nature and arc of their respective diseases is considerably different. So the disease (or condition, or syndrome, or pattern or process) is difficult to define. The line between alcoholism, heavy drinking and problem drinking (whatever the hel_l those terms mean) is fuzzy. Ultimately, any of these terms is counter-productive if used as an excuse for endless debate and rationalization. Problem drinking, et al is like pornography. To badly paraphrase the American Supreme Court Justice Justice Potter Stewart speaking of pornography; I may not be able to define it, but I know it when I see it. The same is true, I think, of addictions and other compulsive disorders.

Most alcoholics go through various stages of attempting to control their drinking, to lessen the impact and damage. There is a famous passage in the AA "Big Book" which offers up a long laundry list of all the silly and not-so-silly things we did to try to keep drinking moderate. Someone postponing drinking until 6:00 p.m. is more likely a indication of a problem than an indication of no problem. Social drinkers don't do that. Social drinkers don't need to postpone drinking. Social drinkers don't drink much in the first place, leave drinks sitting unfinished, and can literally and figuratively "take it or leave it." "I can take it or leave it" is a sort of sneaky code or self-deception when an alcoholic says it. Social drinkers mean it. They really DON'T need it, and whether it is available or not is not an issue for them. For me, I avoided social occasions where there wasn't booze available and were not other people there who drank like me.

I consider myself a 100% alcoholic and addict. Over twenty years, my addiction went through various stages. Some years, I did not drink very much during the week, but binged on weekends. Other years, I got drunk several times during a week. Toward the end (a few years toward the end), I thought I had it pretty well under control because I never drank during the day, and on weekends, would postpone going out to the bars until 10:00 p.m. That way I could drink freely for four hours without getting out of control until the bars closed at 2:00 a.m., then we would score some cocaine (at that stage, mostly so that we could drink longer), and go to a friend's house to party until the sun came up. However, my life was a mess, and it would not be until I got clean and sober that I was able to "connect the dots" and realize just how many of my serious life-problems were directly or indirectly caused by drinking and using.

The problem is that our culture has normalized, glamorized and idealized drinking to such an extent that it becomes very difficult to identify alcoholic and addictive behavior, because if "everyone is doing it" or everyone in my crowd is doing it, then it must be normal.

Aloha,

Rex

Great post Rex,

You have just given a readers digest version of my life before I got sober! It's funny how we are all "pees in the pod".

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Don't think the OP is an alcoholic. I drink more than that, probably drink everyday (not in Thailand, in Dubai) at home, usually Vodka. I do stay fit, go the gym, etc I just like drinking.

Currently having a couple of weeks off the booze (+ carbs) as I drop a few kilos prior to my trip to Thailand in 2 weeks (when I will put it back on!)

It's such a habit to drink with food, etc but I guess there's a difference, I stopped and it's not a big deal. Just enjoy drinking. OP sounds similar

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  • 4 weeks later...
I agree ...if a person can simply stop for a month he doesn't have a problem. Simplest test for anyone.

Sorry, it just isn't true.

While there are some alcoholics who can never stop drinking - even for a day - there are countless others who can stop for varying periods ranging from days, weeks, months and even years, but one day return to their drinking habits, and invariably drink more than they did before they stopped.

Read any serious literature on alcoholism, and you will see that this is so.

If you go to any AA meeting, you will find that almost every sober alcoholic can relate experiences where they stopped for varying periods - usually a lot more than a month - before they were finally able to kick it for good.

And of course alcoholics always remain alcoholics. They are never cured, and they never let their guard down because they know that only one drink is enough to start them off again - even if they have been sober for 10, 20 or more years.

And as someone has already posted, binge drinkers can also be alcoholics. The nature of their work sometimes prevents them form drinking every day, but they are still alcoholics. The pattern of such people is that they will gradually drink more and more frequently, as circumstances permit.

Excellent points here.

I worked offshore on 4on 4 off in Thailand. No drink for 4 weeks then boy did I hit it.

I have worked 6/7 weeks on with no drink, back to Thailand and the same again.

The thing is I thought I was OK. Not true.

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Well, I admit that i drink almost every day, but its merely beer.

I dont do spirits at all, even if friends offer a glass or two for free.

Actually, I consume 2-3 bottles of LEO (630 cc) a day, but not during daytime, as I own a little online business, so I

need a sober brain to run it properly.

Usually, I would start drinking after work is done at around 8.00 pm and stop by midnight. If the mood is good, I may drink up to 5 bottles during this time.

This happens about 2 times a week. On the remaining days of the week I just do 2-3 bottles, as said before.

As Im just 35 yrs old, I have yet to experience any impact on my health condition, but nevertheless at some point I feel the situation my be not normal.

May anyone here in the forum tell me whether I drink too much ?

If you can't afford it then you have a problem.

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<snip>

May anyone here in the forum tell me whether I drink too much ?

Hi Lucky,

I am glad to see you ask this question. The answer lies within the question itself. "Social drinkers", those who drink moderately do not raise this question, it is a non-issue for them. They never think about stopping or even cutting down. The question you want to think about and ask yourself is why you are asking the question in the first place? What is going on in your life and your drinking that prompts you to ask?

Finally, I want to comment on your distinction between beer and spirits. There isn't a distinction. They are exactly the same. 1 beer or 1 glass of wine = approximately one shot of spirits. 6 beers = six shots of whiskey, more or less. There is nothing in any way safer or milder or superior about drinking beer but not spirits. Beer just makes you pee more!

Alcohol is a drug; a powerful, destructive, addictive drug. The only difference between booze and other drugs is legality.

Hope this helps you to get some perspective on your drinking behavior.

Aloha,

Rex

spirits damage your insides more than beer

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