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Anyone Dealing With Alzheimer's/dementia


jaideeguy

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mosha....i did check out that website www.azthai.org , but it's in Thai only.

Hi

I just checked for you..use the Translate button on the Google bar..worked ok when I tried.

My step father had this problem...Donepezil Aricept® worked for a while..just google...it is a bit expensive, well it is in the UK

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:D Waddee Jaideeguy ,I understand how you feel with your situation because I look after my mother for nine years . I sometimes get mad ,stressed ,frustrated and tensed but I have no choice to avoid from this siuation . So I am fighting up to the Alzheimer and try to get a long with this disease . Sometimes I do well ,sometimes I do bad but I try to do my best .It is very hard time for everybody ,sir such as your father ,yourself and your family . Your father never change but the disease makes him change , if you don't know what you should do ,PLEASE touch him gently ,talk to him softly and tell him how much he is beloved . Try to imagine when you were a little boy ,how did he do many things for you . Just thinking he is your little baby ,he needs you if you walk a way from him ,how he can survive . Just love ,forgive everything that he said or he did , try to accept this disease and change your point view .Happiness or sadness it is up to you .You can choose the heaven or the hel_l .May god bless you ,your father and your family .

Would you mind if I suggest you something ,please search for Tim Brennan ,he is an american gentlrman ,he is Alzheimer patient and he wrote about himself .I tried to linking the web for you but this I am mot permitted by webboard

You can go join us in webboard azthai.org ,we are Thai people but we are glad to help you ,don't worry we can read English ,We are on the same boat . or you can write e-mail to me , Maybe I can help you something . Take care of yourself ,Try to have a good sense of humor it helps a lots. :):D:D:D

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ohh!!! that's very painful..........

Yes,sir .It is very hard but I have no choice .So I think that one thing that I can do ,just accept this situation and try do my best . My mom's life and mine must go up ,the show must go on . I cannot waste my time because Alzheimer patients go worse very quickly .Actually ,my mom is sick for thirteen years and she is still alive .She can eat , does not sleep as vegetable though she cannot walk (I have to carry her) . She always come first .Love , forgive ,positive thinking ,do with heart and manage with brain .Everything is not too dificult for the caregiver. :):D:D:D

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There is a history of Alzheimer's in my family (dad's side) and also dementia (mother's side) with my Grandmother's sister.

My Grandmother is 94, independent by living alone and still driving.

She's very clear headed, and can hold conversations on a variety of topics.

However.....she is making accusations that are bizarre, and factually untrue.

She accused the neighbor in the apartment below of trying to "steal her papers" and thought he was going to "kill her" by hitting her on the head with a hammer. She also called the police. No evidence of this, and the neighbor is very nice, and our family knows his parents.

She has made other bizarre accusations of family members: she accused my father of "planting" the neighbor below here, so the neighbor could "steal her papers."

After these accusations (of which there are many) she talks and acts normal and rationale.

I am quite sure that she is in early stages of dementia - can anyone give info if this is true?

I think it will only get worse, as time goes on.

Yes, what you describe is dementia.

In a younger person the new onset of this behavior would warrant a battery of physical and psychological tests to see exactly what is causing it but at 94 it really doesn't matter and the stress of seeing a lot of doctors etc would probably outweigh the value of anything they might discover.

Just cope with it as best you can...starting with a family meeting to discuss her living arrangements as living by herself, driving around in a car on her own etc no longer such a good idea. Ideally she should be living with someone, if that is not possible then needs to be checked on regularly.

How fast this will progress is impossibel to predict. She may stay as she is-- usually OK with occasional lapses into delusional thinking -- for some tiem or she may progress rapidly to being delusional all or most of the tiem, no one can say.

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There is a history of Alzheimer's in my family (dad's side) and also dementia (mother's side) with my Grandmother's sister.

My Grandmother is 94, independent by living alone and still driving.

She's very clear headed, and can hold conversations on a variety of topics.

However.....she is making accusations that are bizarre, and factually untrue.

She accused the neighbor in the apartment below of trying to "steal her papers" and thought he was going to "kill her" by hitting her on the head with a hammer. She also called the police. No evidence of this, and the neighbor is very nice, and our family knows his parents.

She has made other bizarre accusations of family members: she accused my father of "planting" the neighbor below here, so the neighbor could "steal her papers."

After these accusations (of which there are many) she talks and acts normal and rationale.

I am quite sure that she is in early stages of dementia - can anyone give info if this is true?

I think it will only get worse, as time goes on.

Yes, what you describe is dementia.

In a younger person the new onset of this behavior would warrant a battery of physical and psychological tests to see exactly what is causing it but at 94 it really doesn't matter and the stress of seeing a lot of doctors etc would probably outweigh the value of anything they might discover.

Just cope with it as best you can...starting with a family meeting to discuss her living arrangements as living by herself, driving around in a car on her own etc no longer such a good idea. Ideally she should be living with someone, if that is not possible then at a minimum needs to be checked on daily.

How fast this will progress is impossibel to predict. She may stay as she is-- usually OK with occasional lapses into delusional thinking -- for some tiem or she may progress rapidly to being delusional all or most of the tiem, no one can say.

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Waddee Wrong turn ,one thing that I can suggest that take care of her with love ,try to make her happy ,treat her as your love she always is the first person you care , always tell her that how much everybody love her, forgive and forget everything that she said or do ( she forget quickly ?) .I have looked after my mom about nine years .In those day ,many people believe the patient would die in ten years if the patient never been taken with medicine but my mom never takes any medicine . She is still alive ,I think the elderly ,the patient ,the weak need love much more than anyone because they cannot help themselves .

These things I do for my mom , talk to her sweetly ,touch her softly ,hug or kiss often when she get mad or confused it help a lots , cook the food that she likes, her business come first , treat her as the VIP ,pay attention ,observe her symtom ,make her laugh from any jokes ,make her smiles ,try to do the best , a good sense of humorous . The patients will forget your name ,their names ,forget everything but NEVER forget the love .How can I know ? I can see everything from their emotions ,body language .

why I say only love love love because if you love someone ,you will understand their nature , try to learn about her /him and what they want . You can visit azthai.org and you can post you questions on webboard in English .There are many kind-hearted people there ,maybe they can help you someting . or you can contact me if you want more information .I am willing to help :):D:D:D

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There is a history of Alzheimer's in my family (dad's side) and also dementia (mother's side) with my Grandmother's sister.

My Grandmother is 94, independent by living alone and still driving.

She's very clear headed, and can hold conversations on a variety of topics.

However.....she is making accusations that are bizarre, and factually untrue.

She accused the neighbor in the apartment below of trying to "steal her papers" and thought he was going to "kill her" by hitting her on the head with a hammer. She also called the police. No evidence of this, and the neighbor is very nice, and our family knows his parents.

She has made other bizarre accusations of family members: she accused my father of "planting" the neighbor below here, so the neighbor could "steal her papers."

After these accusations (of which there are many) she talks and acts normal and rationale.

I am quite sure that she is in early stages of dementia - can anyone give info if this is true?

I think it will only get worse, as time goes on.

Yes, what you describe is dementia.

In a younger person the new onset of this behavior would warrant a battery of physical and psychological tests to see exactly what is causing it but at 94 it really doesn't matter and the stress of seeing a lot of doctors etc would probably outweigh the value of anything they might discover.

Just cope with it as best you can...starting with a family meeting to discuss her living arrangements as living by herself, driving around in a car on her own etc no longer such a good idea. Ideally she should be living with someone, if that is not possible then needs to be checked on regularly.

How fast this will progress is impossibel to predict. She may stay as she is-- usually OK with occasional lapses into delusional thinking -- for some tiem or she may progress rapidly to being delusional all or most of the tiem, no one can say.

Thanks, Sheryl.

I called her last week, and she was very clear and lucid. She even remembered what city I lived in (in the past she would ask "how is China?" I have never lived in China. And she asked and answered a lot of quesions.

As for her living arrangements my family helped her move out of her old apartment (because of her belief the neighbor would "kill" her) and she lives in a senior apartment complex: she lives alone, but you can eat there in the cafeteria, join social groups, and it has other means of support and activities.

However at this new senior place, a person must be able to live alone, and cannot have any physical or mental disabilities.

Thanks for noting that she may stay the same, or get worse.

I'll keep you posted.

And Penguin, thank you. Good advice.

Edited by Wrong Turn
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  • 1 month later...

Just a check in to say that Pop is ok....caregiver is now live-in and gives me a break, but pop always has something to complain about and unlucky for the caregiver, he aims his nastiness at the him, who has a thick hide and is much more compationate and patient than me.

I have connected with this alz/dem forum and share sad stories with other caregivers.......wow, i thought I had it bad. http://alzheimers.infopop.cc/eve/forums

Highly recomended if you are dealing with this terrible disease.........

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I'm pleased that you are getting some help/relief. No one who hasn't lived with these sufferers knows how bad it can get, not even family. My sister in law who, at the time, lived about a 5 minute walk from us once said. "Stephen, we know what you are going through." I just looked at her and said "You haven't a bloody clue."

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  • 8 years later...

I know this is an old thread but I am now dealing with the same thing with a relative who is suffering from painfully obvious Alzheimer's disease and is now exhibiting all of the warning signs very obviously.  He's reached a point where he can barely recognize his own handwriting, has trouble telling what day it is, cannot manage finances rationally and can easily sign things he doesn't understand and won't remember.


He is being robbed blind by his much younger Thai girlfriend who is trying to get him to sign over more and more financial and legal control. 

 

Does anybody know how his family members can prevent this?  Is there a way to get him declared incompetent or similar to prevent the signing of anymore legal documents?  I and the rest of his family are terrified that he may sign legal control of himself over to this terrible girlfriend and it may be very difficult to reverse later.  

 

He is basically insane and thinks the thai girlfriend and his family is against him but it's quite the opposite.  

 

 

 

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There are certainly ways of doung this in his home country. And there are ways Thai families can do this in Thailand, so in theory should be possible for a foreign family as well but likely will involve a lot of time and legal fees. The big danger is that the Thai GF may bribe/influence the proceedings if she can. There is a lot of corruption in Thailand.

I suggest you disciluss the situation with your Embassy. They can provide more info and list of lawyers.

If you decide to go this route Doctor certification of his condition will be necessary. Dr. Ketchai at Bumrungrad specializes in dementia.

Re his delusions etc -- is it possible she is drugging him,? Not unknown here.

Sent from my SM-J701F using Thailand Forum - Thaivisa mobile app

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4 hours ago, Sheryl said:

There are certainly ways of doung this in his home country. And there are ways Thai families can do this in Thailand, so in theory should be possible for a foreign family as well but likely will involve a lot of time and legal fees. The big danger is that the Thai GF may bribe/influence the proceedings if she can. There is a lot of corruption in Thailand.

I suggest you disciluss the situation with your Embassy. They can provide more info and list of lawyers.

If you decide to go this route Doctor certification of his condition will be necessary. Dr. Ketchai at Bumrungrad specializes in dementia.

Re his delusions etc -- is it possible she is drugging him,? Not unknown here.

Sent from my SM-J701F using Thailand Forum - Thaivisa mobile app
 

It's totally possible she is drugging or poisoning him.  He has had long term syptoms of cognitive decline, however he really fell off a cliff, so to speak, when he got together with her.  She has a history of parasitic behavior and taking advantage of other older foreigners.  She's had at least one other husband more than double her age.

It's a terrible situation and we have no idea what to do.

 

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Where are you? Are you in Thailand now or in your home country?

 

If you are in Thailand talk to your Embassy as a first start. And I suggest also bringing him to see Dr. Ketchai and explaining the whole situation to him including your fears. He can arrange all necessary tests both of cognitive status and toxicology.

 

If you are in your home country contact the State dept/Foreign Ministry and explain the situation and see what they advise.

 

Clearly the best thing would be to get him back home if you can somehow manage to do that. 

 

Thailand has recently revised the rules on extensions of stay for retirement in a manner that makes documentation more difficult and it would be very challenging for a person with cognitive impairment to manage the process so you might look into whether his permission to stay (sometimes incorrectly called a visa, actually it is extension of stay under a visa) is current or not.

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1 hour ago, Sheryl said:

Where are you? Are you in Thailand now or in your home country?

 

If you are in Thailand talk to your Embassy as a first start. And I suggest also bringing him to see Dr. Ketchai and explaining the whole situation to him including your fears. He can arrange all necessary tests both of cognitive status and toxicology.

 

If you are in your home country contact the State dept/Foreign Ministry and explain the situation and see what they advise.

 

Clearly the best thing would be to get him back home if you can somehow manage to do that. 

 

Thailand has recently revised the rules on extensions of stay for retirement in a manner that makes documentation more difficult and it would be very challenging for a person with cognitive impairment to manage the process so you might look into whether his permission to stay (sometimes incorrectly called a visa, actually it is extension of stay under a visa) is current or not.

I am at home.  Unfortunately we helped him renew his visa before realizing the depth of the problems going on over there.

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Re doctor, the one I suggested is in Bangkok. In Chiang Mai, go to the government psych hospital, their neuro consultants are in clinic on Tue, ed & Fri

http://www.suanprung.go.th/eng/

 

Waits will be long but they will be able to do a thorough evaluation and if it is indicated (i.e. he is unsafe/a danger to himself) can arrange involuntary admission.

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1 hour ago, Sheryl said:

Re doctor, the one I suggested is in Bangkok. In Chiang Mai, go to the government psych hospital, their neuro consultants are in clinic on Tue, ed & Fri

http://www.suanprung.go.th/eng/

 

Waits will be long but they will be able to do a thorough evaluation and if it is indicated (i.e. he is unsafe/a danger to himself) can arrange involuntary admission.

Thanks.

 

The problem is he likely won't be cooperative. 

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Went through this with Mom.

I didn't read most of the replies because pondering this is a little too close to home, so forgive me if it's already been said a bunch:

 

Losing someone close to you in slow motion is the hardest thing ever. The day they forget who you are is a crushing event. Caregivers can experience untold stress and emotional devastation that can lead to physical collapse. Get help. The time will come when it is too great a burden to bear.

 

The best caregivers imo are the ones not emotionally attached to the victim. Take care of you first. You've got to protect that child, your wife, your marriage, and your health. There is no shame in shifting his care to others who won't be emotionally destroyed by taking care of him. Create some safe distance from what lies ahead.

 

It's a brutal evil disease, just remember your dad didn't choose that fate.

 

I wish the best for you.

 

One shining moment in it all for us tho was long after my mom was way gone mentally, I heard about music therapy.

She had loved music and they say that's the last thing to go.

So we put some of her old favorites on, and remarkably she became animated again, smiling and laughing, bouncing around.

The music definitely triggered something deep.

It was like she finally got to experience a bit of joy again, months after she last spoke or smiled.

Food for thought.

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54 minutes ago, YogaVeg said:

Went through this with Mom.

I didn't read most of the replies because pondering this is a little too close to home, so forgive me if it's already been said a bunch:

 

Losing someone close to you in slow motion is the hardest thing ever. The day they forget who you are is a crushing event. Caregivers can experience untold stress and emotional devastation that can lead to physical collapse. Get help. The time will come when it is too great a burden to bear.

 

The best caregivers imo are the ones not emotionally attached to the victim. Take care of you first. You've got to protect that child, your wife, your marriage, and your health. There is no shame in shifting his care to others who won't be emotionally destroyed by taking care of him. Create some safe distance from what lies ahead.

 

It's a brutal evil disease, just remember your dad didn't choose that fate.

 

I wish the best for you.

 

One shining moment in it all for us tho was long after my mom was way gone mentally, I heard about music therapy.

She had loved music and they say that's the last thing to go.

So we put some of her old favorites on, and remarkably she became animated again, smiling and laughing, bouncing around.

The music definitely triggered something deep.

It was like she finally got to experience a bit of joy again, months after she last spoke or smiled.

Food for thought.

Thanks for the advice.

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