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Joel Barlow

Flakey Farang Stories

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stroking rabbits?

oh, i know. Thought maybe that was some sort of euphemism!

No, not 666 Joe.

as far as I know, that other guy is still in Thailand, but has

too many debts here in ChiangRai to want to stick around here much.

One guy, who called himself "Santi", claimed computer skills, got several

people to place their problematic machines with him, sold them all for

about B60,000, and split. The cops got him in Pattaya. He served 5 years.

I don't exspect he'll be back much either.

High price to pay for B60,000!

How's that saying go, "A fool and his monkey are soon partying"?

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I don't know how these two do on the flakiness scale but definitely a pair of oddballs.

They were two Scandinavians, worked on the North Sea oil rigs, two weeks on two off which they spent in Pattaya.

They'd appear mid morning and head for the nearest bar, sit down and DRINK, and when I say DRINK these two made today's binge drinkers look like teetotallers and it was firewater not beer. They keep it up for two or three hours intil virtually comatose they stagger off back to the hotel for nine or so hours and then do it all again. They must have eaten sometime but I never saw them eat so much as a peanut. I never saw then with a girl either, they may have been gay for all I know but I doubt it.

That would be pretty well it for the two weeks then they'd go back to their jobs. All they'd see of Thailand and Pattaya was their hotel room and, usually, the same bar. They were never any trouble and the bar owner, surprise surprise, loved it when they hove into view on the first day of their break.

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keep em coming Joel. :D

Euphemism !? ..... nah ! , dont know any Euphemism's Joel . .. ....... Ah. Yes, maybe. ......

A friend used to say 'show us your monkey' to some ladies when they were out of earshot. Maybe that was a lesser known Euphemism :)

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stroking rabbits?

oh, i know. Thought maybe that was some sort of euphemism!

No, not 666 Joe.

as far as I know, that other guy is still in Thailand, but has

too many debts here in ChiangRai to want to stick around here much.

One guy, who called himself "Santi", claimed computer skills, got several

people to place their problematic machines with him, sold them all for

about B60,000, and split. The cops got him in Pattaya. He served 5 years.

I don't exspect he'll be back much either.

High price to pay for B60,000!

How's that saying go, "A fool and his monkey are soon partying"?

Hello Joel, I'm enjoying this thread, I've never had the pleasure of reading any of your posts before as I'm one of the 'newbies' although I did hear your name mentioned by Sceadugenga just the other day as you live close to me apparently.

I actually met a lot more flakey farang during my 5months in Chiang Mai then I have in over 2yrs here in CR but there is one that I met here who I won't forget. It was a while ago now when I used to be out and about more and got chatting to this guy at a bar. He was probably in his late 50's and, after a few beers, he told me how he 'rents' girls from the hill-tribes up here. He said he would visit one of the villages and choose a girl, usually around 15-16yrs old, and then have a contract written up between him and their father which listed what he expects from the girl during the duration of the contract, usually 3-4 years, and would cover many services including sexual ones. He would then take the girl home and return her when the contract expired. Maybe true or maybe he'd had too many beers, who knows!

You're mention of a monkey reminded me about another sad story I recently read about a monkey and dog who were best friends and had lots of media coverage. But the dog's neighbour, a policeman, was jealous of the dogs fame and poisoned him.

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I wonder if I can write this to sound as funny as it was?

when I first came to thailand, about 8 years ago, me and a mate were sat in a small cafe on rajvitti, having a late breakfast.

A yougish fallang walks in, with his tracksuit trouser hanging halfway down his arse, sits at the table next to us and starts talking to himself. asking questions and giving answers.

The thai woman owner asked for his order and he told her he "wanted to push a live fish up her arse" so she picked up a chair and chased him out onto the street.

In his hand he had a 5baht bottle of water, which he squeezed so hard the top flew off and the water hit the woman square in the face.

She chased him up the street and all the Tuk Tuk drivers were laughing and shouting.

I knew I'd like Chiang mai after that.

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Nice to have started a thread which has yet to get me flammed -

it was mostly people acting like I'd somehow imposed on them by posting, which put me off

from Thaivisa for so long.

But I myself, amazingly, unbelievably, have been flakey:

I didn't check in at immigration to notify that I still live in the house I had built

(for millions of baht...)...

and so must rush off and fork over some cash today.

then buy "milk" for the kids (not milk, not even lectasoy -

it's gotta be special, hard to find stuff... which I like much better too).

and go to the bank, and pay for my slow, flakey internet "air stick"

(talk about flakey - can't get a land line to my house, here in amphoe muang!!!)

and lots of things which were easier to get tended to when I was a busy person,

not a retired one.

Would tell you all about my ChiangHai internet magazine, but suspect that violates

forum rules.

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Joel, this is the new and improved Chiang Rai Forum. Nicer people, all chatty and into social networking and being helpful. It is a new day and a new way. Much to the chagrin of some. :)

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Theres no Guarantee you won't get flamed Joel, but most of us don't take it too seriously.

we will Guarantee to find someone who can put the flames out for you though B)

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I won't flame you, Joel. Nice to see you on here. Have heard good stuff about you.

Just so you know, we all have a bit of the "flame demon" in us but we usually take that out on VF. As long as he keeps posting, I think you will be safe. If he abandons us, we'll be looking for a new whipping boy. However, jubby is next in line for that, I believe. He kind of likes it, more than VF does.

Welcome back.

Edited by kandahar

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Joel, this is the new and improved Chiang Rai Forum. Nicer people, all chatty and into social networking and being helpful. It is a new day and a new way. Much to the chagrin of some. :)

Yes there are some very flakey people onthis new impoved ChiangRai forum. Some of them even like to meet each ther in Real life.....how flakey can you get. :unsure:

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Joel, this is the new and improved Chiang Rai Forum. Nicer people, all chatty and into social networking and being helpful. It is a new day and a new way. Much to the chagrin of some. :)

Yes there are some very flakey people onthis new impoved ChiangRai forum. Some of them even like to meet each ther in Real life.....how flakey can you get. :unsure:

Hey, I met you briefly harrry , and survived !. ....... Just :D

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Joel, this is the new and improved Chiang Rai Forum. Nicer people, all chatty and into social networking and being helpful. It is a new day and a new way. Much to the chagrin of some. :)

Yes there are some very flakey people onthis new impoved ChiangRai forum. Some of them even like to meet each ther in Real life.....how flakey can you get. :unsure:

Hey, I met you briefly harrry , and survived !. ....... Just :D

Snap we met briefly also (Rimkok) and like Jub says your still here to talk about it,nice encounter H hope we have a longer chat next time,cheers M8:) .

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Joel, this is the new and improved Chiang Rai Forum. Nicer people, all chatty and into social networking and being helpful. It is a new day and a new way. Much to the chagrin of some. :)

Yes there are some very flakey people onthis new impoved ChiangRai forum. Some of them even like to meet each ther in Real life.....how flakey can you get. :unsure:

Hey, I met you briefly harrry , and survived !. ....... Just :D

Snap we met briefly also (Rimkok) and like Jub says your still here to talk about it,nice encounter H hope we have a longer chat next time,cheers M8:) .

harry was a bit flaky though If I recall. Looks like things sort of drop off him. Look like his finger was gonna drop off when I saw him :D

Did you ever get those Boots Wora ?

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