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scorpio1945

Forum Civility

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I am curious. What is the physiology behind the back and forth barbs seen in some recent and previous threads here and in other forums. I was just watching a show that was discussing the role testosterone plays in male behavior. Among other things it says high testosterone levels make one need a higher level of respect and that it is higher in lower achievement groups. Makes sense why the boys in the hood need to shoot each other over a wrong word or a perceived slight.

Why do people need to defend or attack someone they perceive have slighted them, especially on a forum. What is the profit? In their eyes does it make them feel they gained respect? (does it?) Does it make them feel good? It may make a little sense in some settings, but on a forum?

If they respond in kind, are they not lowering themselves to the level (or below) of the person they presumably have no respect for. Why not ignore it (a macho thing?), respond to it a humorous fashion which would tend to diffuse the situation or respond in a civil, logical, intelligent way which would make the other party look rather foolish, childish or what ever applies, to other readers. Do some readers see this as wimping out or as I do, a sign of intelligence.

These exchanges do not bother me in the least but has always puzzled me since I joined this, my first, forum.

Not trying to take a pot shot at ANYONE, just trying to invite a level of civility.

 

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I guess it is the nature of the beast.

Ive been guilty of it on another web forum.

But i do agree.

It is a democratic society, and some push their rights banner more than others.

I guess we have to put up with it sometimes.

It is up to the moderator to use his dicrection as to what is posted.

Just thought i would put my bit in, more might!

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Out of context quote: "It is up to the moderator to use his dicrection as to what is posted."

If the posters don't have the common sense, then I would agree that a moderator should step in.

For example, that Walen School thread has long outlived any value. Long overdue for a moderator to close it. (IMHO :)

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scorpio1945,

Yes. Agreed. Civility can quickly become a victim in a spirited forum. To everyone's detriment.

An old gentleman I greatly respected once cautioned me. When I feel compelled to say, or do something. Ask two questions of myself. Is it the right thing? And, is it necessary?

I also remember what Richard Pryor said about confrontations, "Ego will heal a lot quicker than a broken jaw."

Peace

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My mother used to tell me "you catch more flies with honey then you do with vinigar".

I have mostly stopped reading the posts attached to the TV New reports.

I also certainly enjoy the friendly banter that goes on here and I find useful information by reading posts and disregard the rest.

Human nature being what it is, you will always find those that "run into burning buildings to save lives and those that set the fire".

It's a good question Scorpio and if the answer does appear you may have discover the "Meaning of Life". clap2.gif

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It is the Eternal September effect.

I've seen things you people wouldn't believe. Whole forums on fire off the shoulder of the usenet. I watched ad hominems glitter in the dark near the Tanhauser Gate. All those moments will be lost in time, like tears in rain.

Edited by necronx99

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I liken it to being at a pub. A social situation (virtual though it may be) with many different discussions happening at the same time.

Every so often you will encounter a couple having an argument.

At first everyone around listens in slightly amused at the nature and content of the argument - "Why are they getting worked up over such a trivial issue?", "It's funny how he misinterpreted what she said" etc..

After a while, that amusement turns to embarrassment for the people involved, and then eventually annoyance ("Would you just get over it already and move on")

Eventually everyone else in the pub goes back to their own conversations and the couple continue to argue but no one else is paying much attention now, or it fizzles out and they make up and continue talking about something else or go their separate ways.

Edited by Riggi

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Just take a deep breath and think....

"Would I say this in a face to face situation?"

It's easy then. cool.png

This is the simplest test. Would you say it to a stranger or passing acquaintance in a bar.

And if so, after you wake up in the ambulance, would you have them take you back to the bar so you can say it again?

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There is no doubt that the anonymity of the net contributes to some of the anti-social behaviour occasionally seen.

If one was speaking face to face with others, it would be doubtful many of the flame type comments would be made.

Especially if the speaker knew there could be immediate....ermmm...physical repercussions.

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If the posters don't have the common sense, then I would agree that a moderator should step in.

For example, that Walen School thread has long outlived any value. Long overdue for a moderator to close it. (IMHO smile.png

Walen School is a sponsor (paid advertiser) and as such has the right to do a reasonable amount of self promotion.

The thread in question was started 31 January 2012- surely not such a "long" time.

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Scorp, I find it interesting that no one has really dealt with your question as you presented it. Perhaps it struck too close to home with your reference to underachievers and the thuggish behavior of the lowest elements of society.

Notice how many responders spoke of physical violence in their responses. I have alway considered a violent or unconsidered response to anything as barbaric and uncivilized, showing little growth from ones prehistoric roots.

Though mankind has made tremendous technological leaps, our development as a species seems to have stalled or to be going backwards. I suppose one could look at forums as a microcosm of the world today with divergent groups and ideas being thrown into close proximity by modern technology.

In the past we lived in relatively homogenous groupings and tolerated very little divergence from the norm. Today many maintain that same level of intolerance yet find themselves in close proximity to others who do not hold the same beliefs.

Many have yet to develop the strategies that allow them to interact without resorting to violence, physical or verbal. So I would agree that our genetic inheritance plays a part in this undesirable forum behavior but lets not forget that we evolved the executive functions of our brains to filter and mitigate our more primitive reactions to things. Some seem incapable of availing themselves of these higher functions, however.

Not trying to take a pot shot at ANYONE, just trying to answer your question with a level of civility. Considering the background and advanced age of most here, I wouldn’t hold my breath in anticipation of change.smile.png

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TV would not dare close this thread. Some people get special treatment. Walen after all is a SPONSOR! Get it?

Out of context quote: "It is up to the moderator to use his dicrection as to what is posted."

If the posters don't have the common sense, then I would agree that a moderator should step in.

For example, that Walen School thread has long outlived any value. Long overdue for a moderator to close it. (IMHO smile.png

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