welshwonder Posted May 3, 2012 Share Posted May 3, 2012 just turn the situation around on her and give her your list of expectations and never fall for the this is Thailand its the way its done bs A bit of common sense saves the day Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KeyserSoze01 Posted May 3, 2012 Share Posted May 3, 2012 Once the ultimatums begin, they never end. What will be the next thing she demands, or else? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
h90 Posted May 3, 2012 Share Posted May 3, 2012 I can't see any positive replies at all? She's a very nice lady and she will be a very good wife. She said in her culture, the boyfriend pays for everything. I tried explaining to her that sometimes we can go dutch when we go out for meals. But she said if the boyfriend doesn't pay for the girlfriend, then what's the point of being a boyfriend to a thai lady. Tell her, in your culture the wife works hard while the man relax all the day to recover from having sex all the night.....And you expect that she gives you half her salary for beer allowance. And you need more than one wife because she just don't earn enough.... 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rsquared Posted May 3, 2012 Share Posted May 3, 2012 You are in your mid 20's <deleted>, live your life and when you are in your mid 30's or even mid 40's then look at some girls in their mid 20's. Don't stuff your life up before it begins. RUN and have some fun first! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Orac Posted May 3, 2012 Share Posted May 3, 2012 Sounds like an expensive deal to me but if she is that good you need to make sure you are getting your moneys worth and not get walked all over. Since her demands are very clear and itemised I suggest you do likewise and draw up your own list of requirements and use these a basis for negotiation and compromise. Your demands could be something along the lines of: 1. To be able to go out where you want and with whoever you want at any time without question. 2. No Thai soap operas to be watched in your presence and you retain full rights of control over any remotes. 3. You are entitled to fart whenever you want without any complaints. You could also include clauses regarding how joint ownership of any assets bought are to be held and a clause to say that you can annul the deal at any time at you discretion. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nocturn Posted May 3, 2012 Share Posted May 3, 2012 Run Forrest Run ! and this guy i a senior member !!! i do not think that length of member(ship) or post count on ThaiVisa has been proved to have any correlation with intelligence. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nocturn Posted May 3, 2012 Share Posted May 3, 2012 It seems like the overall consensus is that her expectations are over the top. I thought I was the only one who think that way. But, if you were to look it in another way, her expectations are very challenging. I'm sure most guys wouldn't back down to this type of challenges, isn't it? Yes, I agreed that my girlfriend is being honest. Hopefully I can change her mind. I have 2 years to change her mind. If I choose to break up with her, I am potentially risking losing a very good and rare thai wife. As I mentioned, I am tired of going in and out of relationship. I'm sure some of you felt the same way as I do. she is testing you ...my advice...tell her its over and you will instantly get a 50% discount on what she is asking .... the houses ok over a period of time you could commit to two and yes you need a car ...as for the condo and shop pfffftttttt she is taking the piss imo.... as a purely academic exercise, i would agree with this hypothesis. However, I would expand on it by suggesting should any such woman as described in the OP actually exist, the very fact that she is testing in this manner at allI excludes her from being considered a potential life partner. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kaspercat Posted May 3, 2012 Share Posted May 3, 2012 I can't see any positive replies at all? She's a very nice lady and she will be a very good wife. She said in her culture, the boyfriend pays for everything. I tried explaining to her that sometimes we can go dutch when we go out for meals. But she said if the boyfriend doesn't pay for the girlfriend, then what's the point of being a boyfriend to a thai lady. I have many Thai employees and nearly half of the female staff gives money and take their Thai boyfriends out to eat. Believe me, many local guys treat their GF like a mommy and goes out with other women. Sounds like this woman is taking you for a ride. With her salary and local husband, they couldn't even hope to buy one house, much less a car. She's milking you, buddy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chrisinth Posted May 3, 2012 Share Posted May 3, 2012 The most important question you should ask her as soon as possible, is what else the family (& possible husband) has told her to say. Make sure she answers. Then you can go under the bridge and contemplate the reply. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Theyreallrubbish Posted May 3, 2012 Share Posted May 3, 2012 Agree with the many other posters that it means she doesn't like you. Look at it this way, she's basically said that being with you is so unpleasant she needs all these things to compensate for the suffering and make it worthwhile. Find someone who likes you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GreenSnapper Posted May 3, 2012 Share Posted May 3, 2012 With her salary and local husband, they couldn't even hope to buy one house, much less a car. A local guy would be a motorbike driver, security guy, construction worker and so on. A Thai who has the funds she demands, would never even come near to her. You, as a decent farang with decent income, you are the price. Not her! And because of that, you set the standards, not her. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JurgenG Posted May 3, 2012 Share Posted May 3, 2012 You both are in your mid 20's It's good to have dream and high expectation. At the beginning, when we were discussing our future with my gf we both had high expectation for the future and similar to the OP hopes to achieve them in a crazy timeframe. It's taking longer than expected but we getting there little by little. A lot of successful people will tell you that without the help and support of an ambitious woman they would never have arrived where they are now. Now the operative words are "help and support". Is your gf going to help you to achieve these goals or does she expect you to do everything by yourself ? Based on her answer what to do next should be easier to decide. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
899cc Posted May 3, 2012 Share Posted May 3, 2012 She is just playing hard to get......................she know's you love her and you will bend over backwards to make happy [inc family-som chai-and all the other trappings] what more could a man want???? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Payboy Posted May 3, 2012 Share Posted May 3, 2012 Look on the bright side - at least she doesn't insist on a house for her "brother". 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shurup Posted May 3, 2012 Share Posted May 3, 2012 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
trainman34014 Posted May 3, 2012 Share Posted May 3, 2012 May be a Troll, maybe not as this does happen more often than we view it on here. When I first started coming to Thailand many moons ago I first came to size up the country with a view to retirement here and secondly find a woman to share that retirement. Within a few days I found myself being quite openly propositioned by women of various ilk and whenever I met any of them on dates they would tell me they loved me either on the first evening or the next. As soon as I heard those words I left and never sought their company again because what they really meant was 'I love the idea that you will be able to give me loads of money'. Now; some people will think that love should be the first priority in a relationship, and if that's the way they feel then it's at their own peril. In my mind it doesn't work like that as other considerations, and there are plenty, come first. Love is something I think will grow as time passes if everything else in a relationship is stable. Better to work on the basics first and make no promises of cash or love forever after. Keep your head and view it as you would a business transaction. What will you get from this venture and will it be worth the time and expense? Sounds kind of cold hearted doesn't it, but these advice's come from hard earned experience in a previous life. At 20 odd the OP still has plenty of time on his side and does not need to hang around with obvious Gold Diggers. This country is loaded with prospective decent partners but it's your job to seek out the right one for you. Start exercising your brain and not just the weapon between your legs ! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pattayadingo Posted May 3, 2012 Share Posted May 3, 2012 That is one hell of an expensive shag (or two). Think how many different women you could have for that sort of money. And if you are not trolling, you really do need to see a shrink for even considering that amount of money. Do they have good institutions for the insane here in Thailand? 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gary A Posted May 3, 2012 Share Posted May 3, 2012 I have never met a Thai woman who was that demanding especially early in the relationship. I think the guy is a troll because no sane guy would put up with conditions like that. If he is for real, I seriously have to question his intelligence. He will find it much better and cheaper to rent a wife. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
phuturatica Posted May 3, 2012 Share Posted May 3, 2012 Sometimes I do actually wonder whether some farang guys are actually all there and for real, seriously? Who would fall for this kind of shit and play that kind of dangerous game? 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
edwinclapham Posted May 3, 2012 Share Posted May 3, 2012 Sometimes I do actually wonder whether some farang guys are actually all there and for real, seriously? Who would fall for this kind of shit and play that kind of dangerous game? Totally agree with you. The farang that subscribes to all of this nonsense actually sets a precedence ... To the OP, you actually havent accounted for Life Insurance within your budget . The upkeep of the properties alone on your demise can be fairly costly Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Berkshire Posted May 3, 2012 Share Posted May 3, 2012 cant believe how many people did not realize this is a troll. Perhaps. If not, then he's demonstrating yet again that when it comes to certain Thai women, it matters not whether you're an old farang, or a young farang. Same same, only the names change. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JurgenG Posted May 3, 2012 Share Posted May 3, 2012 (edited) The main problem in this thread is the OP stated he is in his mid 20's and this forum is mostly populated by 60+ pensioners. Obviously their comments refer to the experience of a "mature" person dating a much younger lady. Maybe TV should set up a section for seniors and one for younger people ? Edited May 3, 2012 by JurgenG Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
edwinclapham Posted May 3, 2012 Share Posted May 3, 2012 The main problem in this thread is the OP stated he is in his mid 20's and this forum is mostly populated by 60+ pensioners. Obviously their comments refer to the experience of a "mature" person dating a much younger lady. Maybe TV should set up a section for seniors and one for younger people ? As someone relatively young I would object to that strongly. I love the views from a good wide selection of age brackets. A section for 60+ would remind me of "god's waiting room" . In the main 60 year olds are todays 40 year olds and to write them off wouldnt be beneficial to the forum Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chrisinth Posted May 3, 2012 Share Posted May 3, 2012 (edited) The main problem in this thread is the OP stated he is in his mid 20's and this forum is mostly populated by 60+ pensioners. Obviously their comments refer to the experience of a "mature" person dating a much younger lady. Maybe TV should set up a section for seniors and one for younger people ? As someone relatively young I would object to that strongly. I love the views from a good wide selection of age brackets. A section for 60+ would remind me of "god's waiting room" . In the main 60 year olds are todays 40 year olds and to write them off wouldnt be beneficial to the forum TV Old Folk's Home. Has a kind of a ring to it! Nurse, I've had an accident.................. Edited May 3, 2012 by chrisinth 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
metisdead Posted May 3, 2012 Share Posted May 3, 2012 A post containing an inflammatory comment has been removed. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nocturn Posted May 3, 2012 Share Posted May 3, 2012 The main problem in this thread is the OP stated he is in his mid 20's and this forum is mostly populated by 60+ pensioners. Obviously their comments refer to the experience of a "mature" person dating a much younger lady. Maybe TV should set up a section for seniors and one for younger people ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GuestHouse Posted May 3, 2012 Share Posted May 3, 2012 I see enormous opportunities for fun here. Play along for a while, buy some house plan books, home and garden style magazines and take her around a few department stores to look at firnature, huge flat screen TVs and all the lucious goodies. Show enthusiasm for the idea and suggest, if she has not already done so, that it just would not do to have a house smaller than the neighbours'. I'm sure she'll apreciate your enthusiasm and reward you accordingly. Enjoy the reward while it lasts, she'll never work harder to keep you happy.... It's all down hill from that point onwards - so enjoy the fun and skip town before the first down payment is due. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pattayadingo Posted May 3, 2012 Share Posted May 3, 2012 The main problem in this thread is the OP stated he is in his mid 20's and this forum is mostly populated by 60+ pensioners. Obviously their comments refer to the experience of a "mature" person dating a much younger lady. Maybe TV should set up a section for seniors and one for younger people ? Common sense has nothing to do with age. You either have it or you do not. A 20 year old idiot is no less an idiot than a 60 year old idiot. A young fool listening to the demands of this type of woman is no less a fool than an older person doing the same. Yes maturity shows because many of us have been there and done that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nocturn Posted May 3, 2012 Share Posted May 3, 2012 I see enormous opportunities for fun here. Play along for a while, buy some house plan books, home and garden style magazines and take her around a few department stores to look at firnature, huge flat screen TVs and all the lucious goodies. Show enthusiasm for the idea and suggest, if she has not already done so, that it just would not do to have a house smaller than the neighbours'. I'm sure she'll apreciate your enthusiasm and reward you accordingly. Enjoy the reward while it lasts, she'll never work harder to keep you happy.... It's all down hill from that point onwards - so enjoy the fun and skip town before the first down payment is due. tell her you are waiting for some money from overseas, but if she wants to start construction earlier, you will pay her parents back if they pony up the down payment. repeat with condo, landrover (go big or go home i say) and any other big ticket items they may require. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BigJohnnyBKK Posted May 3, 2012 Share Posted May 3, 2012 Sometimes I do actually wonder whether some farang guys are actually all there and for real, seriously? Who would fall for this kind of shit and play that kind of dangerous game? You really haven't got out much have you? Millions and millions of pounds, euros and dollars are poured into houses and land and cars in the upcountry sticks every year. Pick a province out of those mentioned frequently here, drive off the main roads into the little towns, look for the "villages" made up of little stick and tin shacks 90% populated with old ladies and little kids. When you come across a nice house that looks like its been built to anywhere close to modern standards, get out, walk around and approach anyone - point to the house and ask "mia farang?". I'd put good money on the answer being yes in the vast majority of cases, maybe even over 80%. And if you investigate further, 80%+ of the owners will no longer be in relationship with the farang that built it. For many provinces, this is their main OTOP after rice. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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