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Some Dog Philosophy


sbk

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The reason a dog has so many friends is that he wags his tail instead of his tongue.

-Anonymous

Don't accept your dog's admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful.

-Ann Landers

If there are no dogs in Heaven, then when I die I want to go where they went.

-Will Rogers

There is no psychiatrist in the world like a puppy licking your face.

-Ben Williams

A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than he loves

himself.

-Josh Billings

The average dog is a nicer person than the average person.

-Andy Rooney

We give dogs time we can spare, space we can spare and love we can spare. And in return, dogs give us their all. It's the best deal man has ever made.

-M. Acklam

Dogs love their friends and bite their enemies, quite unlike people, who are incapable of pure love and always have to mix love and hate.

- Sigmund Freud

I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult.

-Rita Rudner

[]

A dog teaches a boy fidelity, perseverance, and to turn around three

times before lying down.

-Robert Benchley

Anybody who doesn't know what soap tastes like never washed a dog.

-Franklin P. Jones

If I have any beliefs about immortality, it is that certain dogs I have

known will go to heaven, and very, very few persons.

-James Thurber

If your dog is fat, you aren't getting enough exercise.

-Unknown

My dog is worried about the economy because Alpo is up to $3.00 a can. That's almost $21.00 in dog money.

-Joe Weinstein

Ever consider what our dogs must think of us? I mean, here we come back from a grocery store with the most amazing haul -- chicken, pork, half a cow. They must think we're the greatest hunters on earth!

-Anne Tyler

Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea.

-Robert A. Heinlein

If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you; that is the principal difference between a dog and a man.

-Mark Twain

You can say any foolish thing to a dog, and the dog will give you a look that says, 'Wow, you're right! I never would've thought of that!'

- Dave Barry

Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole.

-Roger Caras

If you think dogs can't count, try putting three dog biscuits in your

pocket and then give him only two of them.

-Phil Pastoret

My goal in life is to be as good of a person my dog already thinks I am.

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The reason a dog has so many friends is that he wags his tail instead of his tongue.

-Anonymous

Don't accept your dog's admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful.

-Ann Landers

If there are no dogs in Heaven, then when I die I want to go where they went.

-Will Rogers

There is no psychiatrist in the world like a puppy licking your face.

-Ben Williams

A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than he loves

himself.

-Josh Billings

The average dog is a nicer person than the average person.

-Andy Rooney

We give dogs time we can spare, space we can spare and love we can spare. And in return, dogs give us their all. It's the best deal man has ever made.

-M. Acklam

Dogs love their friends and bite their enemies, quite unlike people, who are incapable of pure love and always have to mix love and hate.

- Sigmund Freud

I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult.

-Rita Rudner

[]

A dog teaches a boy fidelity, perseverance, and to turn around three

times before lying down.

-Robert Benchley

Anybody who doesn't know what soap tastes like never washed a dog.

-Franklin P. Jones

If I have any beliefs about immortality, it is that certain dogs I have

known will go to heaven, and very, very few persons.

-James Thurber

If your dog is fat, you aren't getting enough exercise.

-Unknown

My dog is worried about the economy because Alpo is up to $3.00 a can. That's almost $21.00 in dog money.

-Joe Weinstein

Ever consider what our dogs must think of us? I mean, here we come back from a grocery store with the most amazing haul -- chicken, pork, half a cow. They must think we're the greatest hunters on earth!

-Anne Tyler

Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea.

-Robert A. Heinlein

If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you; that is the principal difference between a dog and a man.

-Mark Twain

You can say any foolish thing to a dog, and the dog will give you a look that says, 'Wow, you're right! I never would've thought of that!'

- Dave Barry

Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole.

-Roger Caras

If you think dogs can't count, try putting three dog biscuits in your

pocket and then give him only two of them.

-Phil Pastoret

My goal in life is to be as good of a person my dog already thinks I am.

This is a wonderful collection.

Thank you for this!

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Money will buy a pretty good dog but it won't buy the wag of his tail. - Josh Billings

The greatest pleasure of a dog is that you may make a fool of yourself with him, and not only will he not scold you, but he will make a fool of himself, too. - Samuel Butler

Animals are such agreeable friends--they ask no questions, they pass no criticisms. - George Eliot

A dog's best friend is his illiteracy. - Ogden Nash

What counts is not necessarily the size of the dog in the fight, what counts is the size of the fight in the dog. - Mark Twain

There is no faith which has never yet been broken, except that of a truly faithful dog. - Konrad Z. Lorenz

Our dogs will love and admire the meanest of us, and feed our colossal vanity with their uncritical homage. - Agnes Repplier

Dogs come when they are called. Cats take a message and get back to you. - Mary Bly

Dogs look up to you. Cats look down on you. Give me a pig. He just looks you in the eye and treats you like an equal. - Winston Churchill

The dog was created specially for children. He is a god of frolic. - Henry Ward Beecher

If dogs could talk, perhaps we'd find it just as hard to get along with them as we do people. - Karel Caprek

To his dog, every man is Napoleon; hence the constant popularity of dogs. - Aldous Huxley

Man is a dog's ideal of what God should be. - Holbrook Jackson

The more I see of the representatives of the people the more I admire my dogs. - Alphonse de Lamartine

I loathe people who keep dogs. They are cowards who haven't got the guts to bite people themselves. - August Strindberg

" I never married because there was no need. I have three pets at home which answer the same purpose as a husband. I have a dog that growls every morning, a parrot that swears all afternoon, and a cat that comes home late at night."

-- Marie Corelli

"My husband and I are either going to buy a dog or have a child. We can't decide to ruin our carpet or ruin our lives. "

-- Rita Rudne

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"He is my other eyes that can see above the clouds; my other ears that hear above the winds. He is the part of me that can reach out into the sea. He has told me a thousand times over that I am his reason for being; by the way he rests against my leg; by the way he thumps his tail at my smallest smile; by the way he shows his hurt when I leave without taking him. (I think it makes him sick with worry when he is not along to care for me.) When I am wrong, he is delighted to forgive. When I am angry, he clowns to make me smile. When I am happy, he is joy unbounded. When I am a fool, he ignores it. When I succeed, he brags. Without him, I am only another man. With him, I am all-powerful. He is loyalty itself. He has taught me the meaning of devotion. With him, I know a secret comfort and a private peace. He has brought me understanding where before I was ignorant. His head on my knee can heal my human hurts. His presence by my side is protection against my fears of dark and unknown things. He has promised to wait for me... whenever... wherever - in case I need him. And I expect I will - as I always have. He is just my dog." - Gene Hill

Edited by tywais
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