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Well, I hear the OP say he is staying out of it. That is good. Only advice I would tell him is to make out the report, take pictures of the damage to the house and himself. Maybe even something from the doctors. Take it to the police. If it ends up in the circular file-- so be it. I only know the story as told here. Even telling the police could give the message that he didn't take "this lesson" as a man and bring on a second lesson. I still think there is a lot more to this story.

Thanks for the constructive reply. Pictures have been taken (on my advice) with copies. Details of injuries are also going to be collected ie broken bones number of stitches etc. Even if he cannot get the police to prosecute this info will help in negotiating a better financial deal. 20k Baht has already been offered and rejected.

The police obviously know about it without him telling them so that is not the issue and if there is any more violence it will not be a second dose but retaliation.

There may well be more to the story in terms of history etc but it is pretty much irrelevant now in that it won't affect the punishment dished out or negotiated.

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I made the mistake and thought I had some Thai friends. Always trying to help when there were problems in the village. I personally don't think it was just about 100 baht and the loss of face.

I'd helped a high tourist police cop a lot, he called me his best friend. When I needed him, he'd been to busy to even listen to me.

Cops in this place of the earth help the guy who's paying more, friends are not often that what you think they are by Western standards.

Frankly said, I wouldn't get involved in your friend's problems, as they'll see you as an enemy as well. It's really down to who you know.

First instance will be that cops will try to make a financial settlement, but only if your friend wants to.

Haven't met Thais who really wanted to ask cops to help them, so let them do it the Thai way.

Most Thais here with some influence do not take foreigners serious.Not even bar girls give us a higher status than a water buffalo.

Keep your nose out and good luck.--wai2.gif

I hear this kind of contradictory message so much. It all about who you know. Then in the next breath your best Thai friend has let you down.

So it is not about who you know but now about who has the money. I wish people would make their minds up.

I find those that say it is impossible to have a genuine relationship with a Thai to be rather sad. Your bargirls may look down on you but is that because you knew no one or had no money?

For me I find that wherever you are in the world there are good and bad aspects but generalisations about nationalities are usually insulting and untrue.

For me everyone is an individual and should be respected as such. Having said that I don't make friends easily. As I said in another post human beings the world over are not a very nice species when opportunities to take advantage of others present themselves. Hows that for an over generalisation? smile.png

You’re asking a question and I did answer it, the way I see it after living here for 10 years.

When you read my post again, you’ll see that I never called him my best friend. The cop did.

All in all it comes back to who you now and how much money you've got.

<deleted> does your bar girl BS mean? My wife has never worked in a bar, I find those generalizations ridiculous and insane.

You’re asking a very serious question what to do, after your ‘friend’ got beaten up and you reply to those, trying to help you in such a nasty way.

You should wake up and realize where you' re living.

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Sorry but you took it the wrong way. I never meant to coment on your wife nor did I but you jumped to that conclusion. I was just commenting on your bar girl generalisation. I do realize where i am living and have been doing so for over 16 years so I am no ignorant novice. One thing I have learnt in that time is most generalisations about Thais are wrong.

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Asking for advice is fine , learning from others is fine , however jumping from that to becoming a qualifed advisor is not fine.

If what you were doing was learning and asking for advice my post would have been different ...... what your stated goal was is to GIVE advice.

I'm sorry if I offended you but the truth is your simply not qualified to advise this person , and like I said their is nothing wrong with understanding that.

Study the topic for a couple of years or more and then you might be in a position to advise but after reading a few internet posts and some deep thought your still not in a position to advise others.

I did point out that it's nice of you to want to try and help and that telling him you would like to and would if you could is a nice thing to do but my advice was simply not to overstep your knowledge and experience and become an advisor on something you are not qualifed to advise someone aboout.

But I wish you good luck in whatever you decide to do and you certianly seem well intentioned

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Asking for advice is fine , learning from others is fine , however jumping from that to becoming a qualifed advisor is not fine.

If what you were doing was learning and asking for advice my post would have been different ...... what your stated goal was is to GIVE advice.

I'm sorry if I offended you but the truth is your simply not qualified to advise this person , and like I said their is nothing wrong with understanding that.

Study the topic for a couple of years or more and then you might be in a position to advise but after reading a few internet posts and some deep thought your still not in a position to advise others.

I did point out that it's nice of you to want to try and help and that telling him you would like to and would if you could is a nice thing to do but my advice was simply not to overstep your knowledge and experience and become an advisor on something you are not qualifed to advise someone aboout.

But I wish you good luck in whatever you decide to do and you certianly seem well intentioned

Are you serious? Study for a few years and get some qualifications before making any suggestions to a friend.

It would be a bit late by then.

I am not setting up as a consultant to victims of crime or looking for a job you know but you come over like a flipping trading standards officer back home where no one can do anything without the right bit of paper. Part of the reason I left was to get away from that mentality.

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I really don't see why you would think your advice collected in part from strangers on the internet would be of any great value to a person who has lived here thier whole life and probabbly seen numerous situations just like this over the course of their life.

To be honest your advice will come from a biased perspective and from a fairly large amount of ignorance on how to deal with it in the first place. How valuable is that ?

You are hundreds of miles away with a cop sleeping on your balcony and are offering advice ? Get serious dude

My point being of course, your own actions show an inability to make very sensible decisions and you probabbly should not be advising others on how to manage their affairs until you can manage your own in a more sensible fashion especially over situations you are unfamiliar on how to manage in the first place.

2 points for you to consider ...... When giving advice it helps if you know what your talking about. When you don't know what your talking about it's best not to give advice

Their is nothing wrong with realising that you would like to help , wish you could help , would if you could , but simply don't have the knowledge or experience to be of any help in this situation. It's actually a little pompus and arrogant of you to think you can. His advice to you is far more valuable than your advice to him on matters Thai you are unfamiliar with, this matter included.

You are seriously going to run around the internet try and learn Thai culture in a week, take advice from random strangers and then try and come off as a qualified advisor ? Would you be asking yourself for advice if this had happened to you or would you be more likely to be asking him ?

Realdeal you sound the pompous one. You criticise for no reason as if you know better. You use a lot of words to say nothing other than I am wasting my time. I certainly found your post a waste of time and If that is all you have to say then judging from your reply alone you are correct. Since when was asking for advice a waste of time?

I am not trying to learn about Thai culture simply trying to find people who may have been through similar experiences and learn from them. What's wrong with that?

This is what is wrong with it.

I am currently in Bangkok and already have an armed guard at my house. Bit over the top I feel as there is no obvious link to me and only my 78 year old MIL + crazy alcholic BIL there. My wifes family are however taking it seriously. Will find out more over the New Year

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Asking for advice is fine , learning from others is fine , however jumping from that to becoming a qualifed advisor is not fine.

If what you were doing was learning and asking for advice my post would have been different ...... what your stated goal was is to GIVE advice.

I'm sorry if I offended you but the truth is your simply not qualified to advise this person , and like I said their is nothing wrong with understanding that.

Study the topic for a couple of years or more and then you might be in a position to advise but after reading a few internet posts and some deep thought your still not in a position to advise others.

I did point out that it's nice of you to want to try and help and that telling him you would like to and would if you could is a nice thing to do but my advice was simply not to overstep your knowledge and experience and become an advisor on something you are not qualifed to advise someone aboout.

But I wish you good luck in whatever you decide to do and you certianly seem well intentioned

Are you serious? Study for a few years and get some qualifications before making any suggestions to a friend.

It would be a bit late by then.

I am not setting up as a consultant to victims of crime or looking for a job you know but you come over like a flipping trading standards officer back home where no one can do anything without the right bit of paper. Part of the reason I left was to get away from that mentality.

You are correct by the time you know enough to advise your friend it will be to late. Yes i'm serious, having education and experience which both take time are important in the world of giving advice.

Let me edit that to ..... giving advice worth listening to

Edited by MrRealDeal
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I really don't see why you would think your advice collected in part from strangers on the internet would be of any great value to a person who has lived here thier whole life and probabbly seen numerous situations just like this over the course of their life.

To be honest your advice will come from a biased perspective and from a fairly large amount of ignorance on how to deal with it in the first place. How valuable is that ?

You are hundreds of miles away with a cop sleeping on your balcony and are offering advice ? Get serious dude

My point being of course, your own actions show an inability to make very sensible decisions and you probabbly should not be advising others on how to manage their affairs until you can manage your own in a more sensible fashion especially over situations you are unfamiliar on how to manage in the first place.

2 points for you to consider ...... When giving advice it helps if you know what your talking about. When you don't know what your talking about it's best not to give advice

Their is nothing wrong with realising that you would like to help , wish you could help , would if you could , but simply don't have the knowledge or experience to be of any help in this situation. It's actually a little pompus and arrogant of you to think you can. His advice to you is far more valuable than your advice to him on matters Thai you are unfamiliar with, this matter included.

You are seriously going to run around the internet try and learn Thai culture in a week, take advice from random strangers and then try and come off as a qualified advisor ? Would you be asking yourself for advice if this had happened to you or would you be more likely to be asking him ?

Realdeal you sound the pompous one. You criticise for no reason as if you know better. You use a lot of words to say nothing other than I am wasting my time. I certainly found your post a waste of time and If that is all you have to say then judging from your reply alone you are correct. Since when was asking for advice a waste of time?

I am not trying to learn about Thai culture simply trying to find people who may have been through similar experiences and learn from them. What's wrong with that?

This is what is wrong with it.

I am currently in Bangkok and already have an armed guard at my house. Bit over the top I feel as there is no obvious link to me and only my 78 year old MIL + crazy alcholic BIL there. My wifes family are however taking it seriously. Will find out more over the New Year

He was not there at my suggestion and was sent home after one night

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Asking for advice is fine , learning from others is fine , however jumping from that to becoming a qualifed advisor is not fine.

If what you were doing was learning and asking for advice my post would have been different ...... what your stated goal was is to GIVE advice.

I'm sorry if I offended you but the truth is your simply not qualified to advise this person , and like I said their is nothing wrong with understanding that.

Study the topic for a couple of years or more and then you might be in a position to advise but after reading a few internet posts and some deep thought your still not in a position to advise others.

I did point out that it's nice of you to want to try and help and that telling him you would like to and would if you could is a nice thing to do but my advice was simply not to overstep your knowledge and experience and become an advisor on something you are not qualifed to advise someone aboout.

But I wish you good luck in whatever you decide to do and you certianly seem well intentioned

Are you serious? Study for a few years and get some qualifications before making any suggestions to a friend.

It would be a bit late by then.

I am not setting up as a consultant to victims of crime or looking for a job you know but you come over like a flipping trading standards officer back home where no one can do anything without the right bit of paper. Part of the reason I left was to get away from that mentality.

You are correct by the time you know enough to advise your friend it will be to late. Yes i'm serious, having education and experience which both take time are important in the world of giving advice.

Let me edit that to ..... giving advice worth listening to

You are bizarre. You seriously advise not to give advice till it is too late as then it will be good advice and based on learning and experience.

So just what qualifications and experience do you have that enables you to advise me that I should not be advising others?

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My best advise stay out of it as you might not know the full story but it is not about 100 Baht but sounds more like a loose of face case to me.

I have seen and heard of those kind of fights from the first day I came to Thailand which was 24 years ago and also I do not understand it but experience told me what goes around comes around.

If you have high value contacts at the top of the chain, you might can do something but keep this contact for yourself and activate them if one day you face some sort of nasty challenges that needs to be resolved to you or a close family members.

Give all the emotional support and advise to your friend but if things boils over it might be good for your friend to move away for a while which should be in the interest of him, the wife and possible children (if any).

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Not young myself, but have had to sleep tooled up, or as the yanks would say. loaded for bear. My land, my kids future and come and steal from my kids, you will have a problem. Jim

For the love of Buddha move your family to a society where you don't have to sleep 'tooled up' to feel safe.

We live here because we love where we live. Why should we move to another country. I sleep many times with a knife under my bed because Mrs feels more save with it. I build my house 50 meters away from my FIL/MIL because I just want to be on the save side. People in our village are great but this does not include outsiders who pass by and who steal from other villagers and not only farangs.

Even when you rent a house in Bangkok, Phuket or other parts of Thailand, it is always good to tool yourself up. You might even need it in Malaysia, Indonesia and this is not only about Thailand.

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Not young myself, but have had to sleep tooled up, or as the yanks would say. loaded for bear. My land, my kids future and come and steal from my kids, you will have a problem. Jim

For the love of Buddha move your family to a society where you don't have to sleep 'tooled up' to feel safe.

We live here because we love where we live. Why should we move to another country. I sleep many times with a knife under my bed because Mrs feels more save with it. I build my house 50 meters away from my FIL/MIL because I just want to be on the save side. People in our village are great but this does not include outsiders who pass by and who steal from other villagers and not only farangs.

Even when you rent a house in Bangkok, Phuket or other parts of Thailand, it is always good to tool yourself up. You might even need it in Malaysia, Indonesia and this is not only about Thailand.

My village is as safe as you can be, kids my lift stuff, but that's kids. Strangers are few and far between, if you are not local you will be seen and noted. Don't think there would be a house, stilt hut etc that does not have a firearm of some kind, legal or not, as said we have no front or back door. We have 3. legal [ not me of course ] rifles. Factory has a permit for 2, hand gun and a pump action shot gun, [ again not me ]

Not a fan of people having guns, had to carry one in my job in OZ, but if others have them then you have to be equal.

Walked a beat in Ladywood Birmingham, from memory 1 in 5 houses, flats were burgled or attempted burglary in a 12 month period.

Compered to that this is a safe country, I sleep, no locked door, no knife or gun by the bed. Factory a different story it's isolated and there is easy money to steal. After all this is a jungle and I mean that literally, thousands of square KM of jungle and people out there that have known no other ways, but wars bombing and crazy murdering dictators.

Still think it is a safer place to live than inner city Melbourne, Sydney, LA or London. Jim

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Not young myself, but have had to sleep tooled up, or as the yanks would say. loaded for bear. My land, my kids future and come and steal from my kids, you will have a problem. Jim

For the love of Buddha move your family to a society where you don't have to sleep 'tooled up' to feel safe.

We live here because we love where we live. Why should we move to another country. I sleep many times with a knife under my bed because Mrs feels more save with it. I build my house 50 meters away from my FIL/MIL because I just want to be on the save side. People in our village are great but this does not include outsiders who pass by and who steal from other villagers and not only farangs.

Even when you rent a house in Bangkok, Phuket or other parts of Thailand, it is always good to tool yourself up. You might even need it in Malaysia, Indonesia and this is not only about Thailand.

My village is as safe as you can be, kids my lift stuff, but that's kids. Strangers are few and far between, if you are not local you will be seen and noted. Don't think there would be a house, stilt hut etc that does not have a firearm of some kind, legal or not, as said we have no front or back door. We have 3. legal [ not me of course ] rifles. Factory has a permit for 2, hand gun and a pump action shot gun, [ again not me ]

Not a fan of people having guns, had to carry one in my job in OZ, but if others have them then you have to be equal.

Walked a beat in Ladywood Birmingham, from memory 1 in 5 houses, flats were burgled or attempted burglary in a 12 month period.

Compered to that this is a safe country, I sleep, no locked door, no knife or gun by the bed. Factory a different story it's isolated and there is easy money to steal. After all this is a jungle and I mean that literally, thousands of square KM of jungle and people out there that have known no other ways, but wars bombing and crazy murdering dictators.

Still think it is a safer place to live than inner city Melbourne, Sydney, LA or London. Jim

We live at a water reservoir and around 300 - 400 strangers pass our village every single day. Villagers got used to strangers as we are directly at the Nam Oon reservoir. We have two large scale resorts just within 500 meters.

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I figured that would be at least one view but he is a friend and to me that means something whatever his nationality. Equally I don't want to become involved inwhat could become a long term feud and have to watch my back for the next 20 years.

I was going to vist him in hospital but he advised against it for that very reason so my help will stay in the background and to do that I need to give him the best advice as to what he can do. The police tend to think of all villagers as stupid so they can just ignore them if they wish so I want them to show they are not stupid.

It's just the same old story. Thais are cowards who cannot fight by themselves, one Thai needs about six other Thais to take care of one Farang. Yes, there will be exceptions to this, but not many.

It's a whole ideological system, we in the west live under Greek ideals. The individual is what counts, a man stands on his own, master of his own fate. Plato, Socrates, the person is the most important, not the group. Asia works under a different ideology, they are part of a bigger scheme, family, village and society or group.

That's why they won't or don't act as individuals.

You can see it in the laws, killing someone is the worst crime in the west, an attack on the individual. Not in Asia, murder yes but not deemed as serious as dealing drugs. That is an attack on the whole society,

No one here will do things off their own bat, it's just the way things are. Jim

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MobilecontentYou could sit in the front of my house and if you didn't see 5 or 10 guys ride by with rifles slung over there shoulders or sat out the back and didn't hear gun shots you would think that something was wrong.

These are jungle people and live off the jungle, plus rice, guns are part of life.

It's the others who carry AK47s, traffic drugs over the border They the one you have to worry about.

Well I don't worry about them, armed with my pocket knife am no threat. The days where they took western hostages for ransom have gone.

My problem are with the junkie Thais, live in jungle villages, cheap drugs, but have access to real firepower, M16s and AKs plus 11 mil Chinese hand guns. Lucky for me they got not hit the side of the rubber sheds or afford the the ammo to switch to fully auto.

Who cares, last real job was max security prison and most of the people I had to deal with wanted to kill me. Jim

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