Where To Meet Normal Ladies?

[NeverSure]

Sorry about my English! Im not a native English speaker but I was living in Australia for a while and this is the best I can do.

I dont want house, car, baby... I have 25 years old mate!

Of course I have money but Im not the father of any lady, of course I can pay some things but people have to work and/or study and be independent.

I just want to meet a good lady have a few drinks, hang out... And share good times, basic needs as well ... I dont want a wife.

So, OP, your English is fine for me, but I can read too!

You want to know where to meet a nice normal Thai girl. You don't want a wife. You want to share good times and "basic needs." You want to share a few drinks and hang out. With a good Thai lady, of course.

I don't understand why anyone on this forum is bothering with you.

[true blue]

all i do is frequent thai bars and go regular and within in weeks your getting phone numbers galore,got a 21 year old tonight and another one on the jeaoulous factor,and im well over the op guys age,

[Dancealot]

Sorry about my English! Im not a native English speaker but I was living in Australia for a while and this is the best I can do.

I dont want house, car, baby... I have 25 years old mate!

Of course I have money but Im not the father of any lady, of course I can pay some things but people have to work and/or study and be independent.

I just want to meet a good lady have a few drinks, hang out... And share good times, basic needs as well ... I dont want a wife.

So, OP, your English is fine for me, but I can read too!

You want to know where to meet a nice normal Thai girl. You don't want a wife. You want to share good times and "basic needs." You want to share a few drinks and hang out. With a good Thai lady, of course.

I don't understand why anyone on this forum is bothering with you.

You don't have to be so blunt, Sir.

[LawrenceChee]

Sorry about my English! Im not a native English speaker but I was living in Australia for a while and this is the best I can do.

I dont want house, car, baby... I have 25 years old mate!

Of course I have money but Im not the father of any lady, of course I can pay some things but people have to work and/or study and be independent.

I just want to meet a good lady have a few drinks, hang out... And share good times, basic needs as well ... I dont want a wife.

So, OP, your English is fine for me, but I can read too!

You want to know where to meet a nice normal Thai girl. You don't want a wife. You want to share good times and "basic needs." You want to share a few drinks and hang out. With a good Thai lady, of course.

I don't understand why anyone on this forum is bothering with you.

You don't have to be so blunt, Sir.

Agree ! Not every 25 year old is ready to settle down for all the responsibilities but it does not harm anyone to start looking for someone good so that he will eventually find his mate.

[LawrenceChee]

Not true In all my time here, I have dated Thai local ladies. You have to try one of the following - Neat dressing - Banks / Restaurants - bring small gifts and surprises - Go to your fav stores and restaurants - Speak to an insurance : property agent - stop going to bars ... I just met another and I agree a wallet helps :-)

What you're talking about are simply undercover hookers.

What a sick way to describe honest hardworking women ...I guess they are all hookers in your country if they fall under the above tsk tsk tsk

[WinnieTheKhwai]

I just removed one of your posts that 'good' ladies would not approve of the language.

Why am I not surprised.

He seems to be still hanging around the places where he can meet a for hire girl. Get out into the general stream of things talk to the sales ladies talk to the waitresses in restaurants. The girls in the massage salons are not all for hire girls. Just change your hang out locations change your life and you will meet a different class of people.

Sorry but with waitresses, Sales girls and massage ladies you might as well date bargirls; same general background, and many of the same issues.

If he's 25 he can find someone with a bit of an education and a job that actually pays some money.

[mesquite]

Just a heads-up--a lot of Thai women avoid western men because so many of the western men in Thailand are shameless perverts, alcoholic, emotionally needy, or in some other way defective.

I understand many Thai women believe if a farang were a good man he would have stayed in his home country. Hard to argue with that.

[mesquite]

Not true In all my time here, I have dated Thai local ladies. You have to try one of the following - Neat dressing - Banks / Restaurants - bring small gifts and surprises - Go to your fav stores and restaurants - Speak to an insurance : property agent - stop going to bars ... I just met another and I agree a wallet helps :-)

What you're talking about are simply undercover hookers.

What a sick way to describe honest hardworking women ...I guess they are all hookers in your country if they fall under the above tsk tsk tsk

Well, there is a school of thought that says exactly that. In the US, for example, a woman can sell her you-know-what for a diamond ring and the promise of a house, car, and lifetime financial support. The legal system is rigged in her favor as there are never prosecutions for this type of prostitution.

[LawrenceChee]

True but only if U want a divorce :-)

I know bitter experiences are part if life but for those of us who have embraced Thailand positively , the woman here have been nothing but uplifting for your souls

Still there are some who like the bitter experiences of buying buffaloes and sin sot

The take is easy, if you behave like a gentleman, show respect and you get the right woman in Thailand and that has nothing to do with looks

[ARISTIDE]

I understand many Thai women believe if a farang were a good man he would have stayed in his home country. Hard to argue with that.

You're quite right but I being a farang you still stand a better chance of getting a Thai lady to like you. (Unless you come up agains some rich skinny Japanese dude)

[transam]

Just a heads-up--a lot of Thai women avoid western men because so many of the western men in Thailand are shameless perverts, alcoholic, emotionally needy, or in some other way defective.

I understand many Thai women believe if a farang were a good man he would have stayed in his home country. Hard to argue with that.

Hmmmmmmmm, really, I must have been a good catch then for my Thai mrs eh. ...........

[OneZero]

Just a heads-up--a lot of Thai women avoid western men because so many of the western men in Thailand are shameless perverts, alcoholic, emotionally needy, or in some other way defective. If you come on too strong or try to move things along too fast you will run off the normal women, but the women who make a career of relationships with defective men will find you.

That's for sure. +1

[tornado24]

Hehehe thanks for the replies! A lot of different opinions... The best places seems to be the banks, university area, shopping malls etc. I live in chang phueak a lot of university ladies around here and I go everyday to eat salad in nimahemin, plenty of chicks in that salad shop!

Another question, why thai men are not friendly with farangs? What do you think about that? I think is a good way, meet a few thais and they introduce me to their chick friends.

I have very good sucess with waiters of farang places but a lot of those ladies are golddigers, not all I think. I took a few and ended up in the same history... Buy me that please... Papa and mama need blablabla, when they start speak about that things I just go away...

[CobraSnakeNecktie]

Just a heads-up--a lot of Thai women avoid western men because so many of the western men in Thailand are shameless perverts, alcoholic, emotionally needy, or in some other way defective. If you come on too strong or try to move things along too fast you will run off the normal women, but the women who make a career of relationships with defective men will find you.

That's for sure. +1

Well Thai men are not exactly knights in shining armor as a lot them are fairly exploitative and selfish.

I think the biggest barrier for Thai women is shyness and the language/culture barrier. Lot's of Thai women would love to land a loyal and generous albeit flawed foreigner if they only knew how...

I am not saying the majority of Thai women but a lot of them out there

[amykat]

Not true In all my time here, I have dated Thai local ladies. You have to try one of the following - Neat dressing - Banks / Restaurants - bring small gifts and surprises - Go to your fav stores and restaurants - Speak to an insurance : property agent - stop going to bars ... I just met another and I agree a wallet helps :-)

What you're talking about are simply undercover hookers.

What a sick way to describe honest hardworking women ...I guess they are all hookers in your country if they fall under the above tsk tsk tsk

Well, there is a school of thought that says exactly that. In the US, for example, a woman can sell her you-know-what for a diamond ring and the promise of a house, car, and lifetime financial support. The legal system is rigged in her favor as there are never prosecutions for this type of prostitution.

I'm so sick of hearing this stupid story here ...how many Western women do not work? How many do earn money on par with men, (although admittedly as a class, women still earn less than men), who support themselves, many of whom these days, may make more than their husband (and will also be liable to pay spousal support ...that is why it is called that, not wife-support), who paid for half of that house, car, furniture, vacations, etc. Many men "buy" that diamond on credit, have school loans to pay off, all of which is paid for from joint money, the couple themselves pay for the wedding, or the woman's family.

My highly (but equally) educated husband, had nearly $300,000 of debt (mostly student loans, however with an equally expensive education, I had no loans as I actually worked and paid for my education) when we met/married, didn't earn more than me, had a leased car, and moved in with one box of things he kept in the garage, other than his clothes of course. I had no debts, a good savings account, 2 paid off cars, a nice house, fully furnished, I supplied the diamond for my wedding ring, and my parents paid for the wedding, then I got a decent family inheritence (slightly before marriage). I bought our business with MY money that was saved up before marriage ...etc. He left the marriage with no debt, tons of assets, nobody paid anyone support money, but I bet if you met him today, he would be singing this same song, as men seem to take it as gospel that this is how it goes in marriage!

I realize I am talking about just ONE example, but I know I am not the only one! I have many female friends who earn more than their spouse, or have contributed in various ways, big ways, money, time, work that has contributed to all the shared assets. And most even have managed to fit motherhood into the program as well.

And those women still usually do most of the housework, plan your social life, do your errands, cook, whatever. I wonder how many men, in their 20s even pay for dates these days? I understand for many people on this forum, due to their age (if you are over 65 or 75, maybe you took care of your wife more financially) but did any of you actually have wives who stayed home and did nothing (no kids), no money of her own for anything? I think that is not very acceptable these days, not many women would look forward to being a stay-at-home wife, childless, and doing nothing. However, if there are some, I guess YOU chose that situation, because you wanted it for some reason, and you knew what the laws were/are regarding sharing property upon divorce. (I will admit some people could get stuck with a sick spouse, or got somehow stuck with some situation you did not expect. However, this is true for women also, who get stuck with a sick spouse who can't work, or doesn't work for many reasons, or who goes into debt doing stupid things, who gambles, who is an alcoholic, many things we can't always predict.)

And I am not sure I understand, why so many men who feel burned by this, resentful about their divorce, then come to a third world country, knowing/thinking they will have an advantage over the woman,(due to finances mostly) looking for another wife, who in some huge percentage of cases, will not earn enough to even dent your utilitly bills, then buys them a house and a car, and pays for every single thing, supports her family to some extent as well? If that last Western situation made you so resentful, why do you come here and then do it freely, before the divorce???? Frankly, here, you are usually in an even worse position if you do indeed, buy all of those things. I know, you will say, at least you are paying upfront, know what you are getting into ..but do you really?? Would your potential next Western wife, not be liable for your debts, be liable to pay you support if you got sick and couldn't work and decided to divorce? Would she only earn 6000 baht a month and be unable to support you if you got sick and didn't divorce? Would she be totally unable to support your children if you couldn't work/ found yourself with no money?

Really, come on, a Western woman's best chance in life, is certainly NOT to get married, and do nothing, but live off of her husband. That might be true in some very small percentage of marriages, where one spouse VASTLY out-earns the other one, but those people are usually very educated, have lawyers, have accountants, and PLAN their marraige and their financial situations out in serious detail. For the most part, a woman needs to work, needs to get educated, in order to secure her financial future. There aren't a lot of multi-millionaire men, who marry ladies with a 6th grade education, who contribute nothing other than companionship, cleaning and cooking. And for those that might, I think they probably take advantage of pre-nuptial agreements in most cases.

Okay, rant over!

[amexpat]

"My highly (but equally) educated husband, had nearly $300,000 of debt (mostly student loans, however with an equally expensive education, I had no loans as I actually worked and paid for my education) ............"

Wow! She either worked and saved for a long time before college or made about $50 - $60K per year after taxes while going to school! Nice job. A self-made woman.

"then I got a decent family inheritence (slightly before marriage)."

[mesquite]

AK,

Wow. Your story sounds like the ones the men tell, only reversed.

Maybe you can find relationship happiness with a young Thai man.

Just sayin'.

Edited March 12, 2013 by mesquite

[TommoPhysicist]

And those women still usually do most of the housework, plan your social life, do your errands, cook, whatever. I wonder how many men, in their 20s even pay for dates these days? I understand for many people on this forum, due to their age (if you are over 65 or 75, maybe you took care of your wife more financially) but did any of you actually have wives who stayed home and did nothing (no kids), no money of her own for anything? I think that is not very acceptable these days, not many women would look forward to being a stay-at-home wife, childless, and doing nothing. However, if there are some, I guess YOU chose that situation, because you wanted it for some reason, and you knew what the laws were/are regarding sharing property upon divorce. (I will admit some people could get stuck with a sick spouse, or got somehow stuck with some situation you did not expect. However, this is true for women also, who get stuck with a sick spouse who can't work, or doesn't work for many reasons, or who goes into debt doing stupid things, who gambles, who is an alcoholic, many things we can't always predict.)

And I am not sure I understand, why so many men who feel burned by this, resentful about their divorce,

I'm guessing you are well under 50 years old.

My former wife 50 when she divorced me, contributed no money to the house, nothing at all, 100% paid for by me.

Her own money, well she had a gold card on my account, and could spend whatever she wanted along with about 12k (UKP) tax free from the government.

I didn't mind her getting 1/2 my pension, not a problem. I did mind her getting 100% of my our house and stopping me ever seeing my our children again. I'm guessing this is what upsets many men here, losing access to their home and their children.

I don't really care about the money, it would have been nice to see my 4 children, but oh well ...............

Yes I am resentful, home lost, children lost ........ would you be OK with losing those?

Edited March 12, 2013 by TommoPhysicist

[elektrified]

Sorry about my English! Im not a native English speaker but I was living in Australia for a while and this is the best I can do.

I dont want house, car, baby... I have 25 years old mate!

Of course I have money but Im not the father of any lady, of course I can pay some things but people have to work and/or study and be independent.

I just want to meet a good lady have a few drinks, hang out... And share good times, basic needs as well ... I dont want a wife.

So, OP, your English is fine for me, but I can read too!

You want to know where to meet a nice normal Thai girl. You don't want a wife. You want to share good times and "basic needs." You want to share a few drinks and hang out. With a good Thai lady, of course.

I don't understand why anyone on this forum is bothering with you.

So at the age of 25 he wants to meet members of the opposite sex, have a good time and then maybe get laid if things go well without falling into the hooker trap?

When I was 25 (and still now at the ripe old age of 38) I was thinking in the same way, I just didn't post it TV but each to their own I guess... Maybe I should of then I wouldn't have spent so much money on ladies of night, however much fun they are!

But the question, and the statement that human touch and sex are basic needs, are pretty much normal in the 21st century - we've kinda moved on from Victorian times, no?

I've never heard of a 25 y/o male spending money on "ladies of the night". What for? At 25? Surely you must be joking. At 25 one can meet plenty of girls the same age and have normal encounters like people do when they are 25.

[amykat]

AK,

Wow. Your story sounds like the ones the men tell, only reversed.

Maybe you can find relationship happiness with a young Thai man.

Just sayin'.

Uhmm, no, I didn't say that I was resentful, that my husband got MY house, MY penison, MY savings, My anything. That is the big difference!

And no, I don't see how or why I would now appreciate a Thai man, especially a young Thai man?

I would appreciate to be married to an equal person, in terms of most things, and have an honest, nice relationship, that doesn't end in misery and divorce! But I am not sure that I am willing to take the chance again. But thanks for the "nice" I think, thought.

[DLock]

You sound like you have minimal game.

What you need is a quality Wingman to bounce off.

My strategy was always to be myself and just have fun with my buddies. Girls are attracted to fun guys - guys who are laughing and joking, ignoring everyone else and not surveying the room for prey.

Whilst I agree that banks and malls may be a target rich environment, flying solo will limit your success...and you will look like a bit like a stalker.

So, find a comparable wingman, be yourself, have fun and they will come to you.

Never chase...ever.

[limegreenpatato]

Sorry about my English! Im not a native English speaker but I was living in Australia for a while and this is the best I can do.

I dont want house, car, baby... I have 25 years old mate!

Of course I have money but Im not the father of any lady, of course I can pay some things but people have to work and/or study and be independent.

I just want to meet a good lady have a few drinks, hang out... And share good times, basic needs as well ... I dont want a wife.

So, OP, your English is fine for me, but I can read too!

You want to know where to meet a nice normal Thai girl. You don't want a wife. You want to share good times and "basic needs." You want to share a few drinks and hang out. With a good Thai lady, of course.

I don't understand why anyone on this forum is bothering with you.

So at the age of 25 he wants to meet members of the opposite sex, have a good time and then maybe get laid if things go well without falling into the hooker trap?

When I was 25 (and still now at the ripe old age of 38) I was thinking in the same way, I just didn't post it TV but each to their own I guess... Maybe I should of then I wouldn't have spent so much money on ladies of night, however much fun they are!

But the question, and the statement that human touch and sex are basic needs, are pretty much normal in the 21st century - we've kinda moved on from Victorian times, no?

I've never heard of a 25 y/o male spending money on "ladies of the night". What for? At 25? Surely you must be joking. At 25 one can meet plenty of girls the same age and have normal encounters like people do when they are 25.

Living under a rock??

[TommoPhysicist]

I've never heard of a 25 y/o male spending money on "ladies of the night". What for? At 25? Surely you must be joking. At 25 one can meet plenty of girls the same age and have normal encounters like people do when they are 25.

What if you don't want to play games with women?

What if you just want to have sex?

Most of the guys I saw trying to get it for free (all my life) were practically begging ........ I'd rather pay cash and forget the games and the begging.

Thailand is a great place, you can have female friends and never have to pester them for sex.

You can go out for dinner with a friend, drop her off at her place after, then go out and buy sex.

Perfect for the single man who doesn't want to play the woman's games.

Edited March 12, 2013 by TommoPhysicist

[amykat]

And those women still usually do most of the housework, plan your social life, do your errands, cook, whatever. I wonder how many men, in their 20s even pay for dates these days? I understand for many people on this forum, due to their age (if you are over 65 or 75, maybe you took care of your wife more financially) but did any of you actually have wives who stayed home and did nothing (no kids), no money of her own for anything? I think that is not very acceptable these days, not many women would look forward to being a stay-at-home wife, childless, and doing nothing. However, if there are some, I guess YOU chose that situation, because you wanted it for some reason, and you knew what the laws were/are regarding sharing property upon divorce. (I will admit some people could get stuck with a sick spouse, or got somehow stuck with some situation you did not expect. However, this is true for women also, who get stuck with a sick spouse who can't work, or doesn't work for many reasons, or who goes into debt doing stupid things, who gambles, who is an alcoholic, many things we can't always predict.)

And I am not sure I understand, why so many men who feel burned by this, resentful about their divorce,

I'm guessing you are well under 50 years old.

My former wife 50 when she divorced me, contributed no money to the house, nothing at all, 100% paid for by me.

Her own money, well she had a gold card on my account, and could spend whatever she wanted along with about 12k (UKP) tax free from the government.

I didn't mind her getting 1/2 my pension, not a problem. I did mind her getting 100% of my our house and stopping me ever seeing my our children again. I'm guessing this is what upsets many men here, losing access to their home and their children.

I don't really care about the money, it would have been nice to see my 4 children, but oh well ...............

Yes I am resentful, home lost, children lost ........ would you be OK with losing those?

Well Tommo, I am sorry for your losses of course. However, in my case, we had no children, something I was very happy to think about during our divorce, because my husband was very resentful and hateful and thought of divorce as some kind of war, and I realized that IF we had kids, my life would be a total hell, much worse than what it was. He even tried to win control of dogs, in court, but LOST! He took me to court over the most ridiculous, petty things, over and over again. We had nothing to dispute (at least nothing that I DID dispute, we settled out of court, and never had a trial, yet our legal bills were over $300,000.00!!!)

I think what happened was very unfair, and I did not come out the winner, by any measure. However, I am not on these forums talking crap about how "all women" get screwed in divorce, and how we "all pay for sex" one way or another, etc. I also didn't come here and try to get a new man, who I can now pay for, everything, all the time, no matter what, because I want to control the next situation, in a somehow better way for me.

I am just sick of this myth, that all men get screwed, and women contribute nothing. I am not sure what happened in your case, obviously, but I do remember you saying that both your wife and you were school teachers and earned equal pay. You say here you had 4 kids? So didn't she contribute? I guess you are saying that she SPENT most of the money on herself? But two school teachers, with 4 kids, wouldn't most of that money NEED to be spent on family things? Even if she spent most of the money, (my husband purposely went into debts that I didn't know about, while he was planning his divorce stategy, because he expected to get divorced, due to his affairs with other ladies. I didn't know about that, so I wasn't planning or protecting myself. I think you said your wife also had an affair.) However, the law is, that if one spouse spends all the money or is ridiculous, then WE, the other spouse will be responsbile for that. I didn't get any "credit" my way, for all the debts he had, that he paid with joint money ...also a lot of it, without my knowledge. Or if your spouse decides that they want to spend $5000 a month on clothes, and you don't put a stop to it, by filing for divorce immediately, the court decides that you "agreed to that." That is just the way it is. My husband had an apartment he rented for his affairs, and a 3rd car, that he bought, to drive during his "other life" periods, he cheated on taxes, stole cash from our business, etc, but none of that was held against him, It was thought of, as I had approved it, because I didn't do anything to stop it. How could I stop something, I knew nothing about?

Life isn't always fair, divorce isn't always fair, especially if you marry someone with no morals or who would love to kill you for your money. I didn't have any way to realize that my husband was one of those people. Some people are very good at manipulation and lies, and covering their tracks. I hope to not have anything to do with people like that in the future, so I mostly, totally avoid people! That has been my solution ...it probably isn't a very good one, but one I can deal with.

[TommoPhysicist]

Sounds like you had a bad time there Amy.

But Thailand is your solution, no need to avoid people, most of the guys in Thailand are happy to be 'just friends' with western women.

Edited March 12, 2013 by TommoPhysicist

[transam]

And those women still usually do most of the housework, plan your social life, do your errands, cook, whatever. I wonder how many men, in their 20s even pay for dates these days? I understand for many people on this forum, due to their age (if you are over 65 or 75, maybe you took care of your wife more financially) but did any of you actually have wives who stayed home and did nothing (no kids), no money of her own for anything? I think that is not very acceptable these days, not many women would look forward to being a stay-at-home wife, childless, and doing nothing. However, if there are some, I guess YOU chose that situation, because you wanted it for some reason, and you knew what the laws were/are regarding sharing property upon divorce. (I will admit some people could get stuck with a sick spouse, or got somehow stuck with some situation you did not expect. However, this is true for women also, who get stuck with a sick spouse who can't work, or doesn't work for many reasons, or who goes into debt doing stupid things, who gambles, who is an alcoholic, many things we can't always predict.)

And I am not sure I understand, why so many men who feel burned by this, resentful about their divorce,

I'm guessing you are well under 50 years old.

My former wife 50 when she divorced me, contributed no money to the house, nothing at all, 100% paid for by me.

Her own money, well she had a gold card on my account, and could spend whatever she wanted along with about 12k (UKP) tax free from the government.

I didn't mind her getting 1/2 my pension, not a problem. I did mind her getting 100% of my our house and stopping me ever seeing my our children again. I'm guessing this is what upsets many men here, losing access to their home and their children.

I don't really care about the money, it would have been nice to see my 4 children, but oh well ...............

Yes I am resentful, home lost, children lost ........ would you be OK with losing those?

Well Tommo, I am sorry for your losses of course. However, in my case, we had no children, something I was very happy to think about during our divorce, because my husband was very resentful and hateful and thought of divorce as some kind of war, and I realized that IF we had kids, my life would be a total hell, much worse than what it was. He even tried to win control of dogs, in court, but LOST! He took me to court over the most ridiculous, petty things, over and over again. We had nothing to dispute (at least nothing that I DID dispute, we settled out of court, and never had a trial, yet our legal bills were over $300,000.00!!!)

I think what happened was very unfair, and I did not come out the winner, by any measure. However, I am not on these forums talking crap about how "all women" get screwed in divorce, and how we "all pay for sex" one way or another, etc. I also didn't come here and try to get a new man, who I can now pay for, everything, all the time, no matter what, because I want to control the next situation, in a somehow better way for me.

I am just sick of this myth, that all men get screwed, and women contribute nothing. I am not sure what happened in your case, obviously, but I do remember you saying that both your wife and you were school teachers and earned equal pay. You say here you had 4 kids? So didn't she contribute? I guess you are saying that she SPENT most of the money on herself? But two school teachers, with 4 kids, wouldn't most of that money NEED to be spent on family things? Even if she spent most of the money, (my husband purposely went into debts that I didn't know about, while he was planning his divorce stategy, because he expected to get divorced, due to his affairs with other ladies. I didn't know about that, so I wasn't planning or protecting myself. I think you said your wife also had an affair.) However, the law is, that if one spouse spends all the money or is ridiculous, then WE, the other spouse will be responsbile for that. I didn't get any "credit" my way, for all the debts he had, that he paid with joint money ...also a lot of it, without my knowledge. Or if your spouse decides that they want to spend $5000 a month on clothes, and you don't put a stop to it, by filing for divorce immediately, the court decides that you "agreed to that." That is just the way it is. My husband had an apartment he rented for his affairs, and a 3rd car, that he bought, to drive during his "other life" periods, he cheated on taxes, stole cash from our business, etc, but none of that was held against him, It was thought of, as I had approved it, because I didn't do anything to stop it. How could I stop something, I knew nothing about?

Life isn't always fair, divorce isn't always fair, especially if you marry someone with no morals or who would love to kill you for your money. I didn't have any way to realize that my husband was one of those people. Some people are very good at manipulation and lies, and covering their tracks. I hope to not have anything to do with people like that in the future, so I mostly, totally avoid people! That has been my solution ...it probably isn't a very good one, but one I can deal with.

Wish l had met you.

[tornado24]

I've never heard of a 25 y/o male spending money on "ladies of the night". What for? At 25? Surely you must be joking. At 25 one can meet plenty of girls the same age and have normal encounters like people do when they are 25.

What if you don't want to play games with women?

What if you just want to have sex?

Most of the guys I saw trying to get it for free (all my life) were practically begging ........ I'd rather pay cash and forget the games and the begging.

Thailand is a great place, you can have female friends and never have to pester them for sex.

You can go out for dinner with a friend, drop her off at her place after, then go out and buy sex.

Perfect for the single man who doesn't want to play the woman's games.

Nowadays is more expensive have a girlfriend than go with a lady bar... I prefer have good friends rather than a girlfriend

Edited March 12, 2013 by tornado24

[amykat]

"My highly (but equally) educated husband, had nearly $300,000 of debt (mostly student loans, however with an equally expensive education, I had no loans as I actually worked and paid for my education) ............"

Wow! She either worked and saved for a long time before college or made about $50 - $60K per year after taxes while going to school! Nice job. A self-made woman.

"then I got a decent family inheritence (slightly before marriage)."

Well I guess you are questioning my honesty ...school loans can be used for living expenses, as well as tuition. He did go to Ivy League graduate school, where I went to state schools, (but not always in my own state) so that part did cost more than my education, and as well, he deferred his loans for some period, while he did internships, that gets very costly. I did make pretty good money as a student, I went to school a bit later than some people, just a few years, but because I had good jobs. He also had, one more year of education then me, technically, for his professional degree, where mine only took 7 years minimum ( I did take 8 actually), his took 8 normally, but he did do one extra year in the middle, in order to get where he wanted to be ...that year was wasted, in a practical sense, but costly. Then some of the money I mentioned was credit card debt ...not only school. Okay??

[amykat]

And those women still usually do most of the housework, plan your social life, do your errands, cook, whatever. I wonder how many men, in their 20s even pay for dates these days? I understand for many people on this forum, due to their age (if you are over 65 or 75, maybe you took care of your wife more financially) but did any of you actually have wives who stayed home and did nothing (no kids), no money of her own for anything? I think that is not very acceptable these days, not many women would look forward to being a stay-at-home wife, childless, and doing nothing. However, if there are some, I guess YOU chose that situation, because you wanted it for some reason, and you knew what the laws were/are regarding sharing property upon divorce. (I will admit some people could get stuck with a sick spouse, or got somehow stuck with some situation you did not expect. However, this is true for women also, who get stuck with a sick spouse who can't work, or doesn't work for many reasons, or who goes into debt doing stupid things, who gambles, who is an alcoholic, many things we can't always predict.)

And I am not sure I understand, why so many men who feel burned by this, resentful about their divorce,

I'm guessing you are well under 50 years old.

My former wife 50 when she divorced me, contributed no money to the house, nothing at all, 100% paid for by me.

Her own money, well she had a gold card on my account, and could spend whatever she wanted along with about 12k (UKP) tax free from the government.

I didn't mind her getting 1/2 my pension, not a problem. I did mind her getting 100% of my our house and stopping me ever seeing my our children again. I'm guessing this is what upsets many men here, losing access to their home and their children.

I don't really care about the money, it would have been nice to see my 4 children, but oh well ...............

Yes I am resentful, home lost, children lost ........ would you be OK with losing those?

Well Tommo, I am sorry for your losses of course. However, in my case, we had no children, something I was very happy to think about during our divorce, because my husband was very resentful and hateful and thought of divorce as some kind of war, and I realized that IF we had kids, my life would be a total hell, much worse than what it was. He even tried to win control of dogs, in court, but LOST! He took me to court over the most ridiculous, petty things, over and over again. We had nothing to dispute (at least nothing that I DID dispute, we settled out of court, and never had a trial, yet our legal bills were over $300,000.00!!!)

I think what happened was very unfair, and I did not come out the winner, by any measure. However, I am not on these forums talking crap about how "all women" get screwed in divorce, and how we "all pay for sex" one way or another, etc. I also didn't come here and try to get a new man, who I can now pay for, everything, all the time, no matter what, because I want to control the next situation, in a somehow better way for me.

I am just sick of this myth, that all men get screwed, and women contribute nothing. I am not sure what happened in your case, obviously, but I do remember you saying that both your wife and you were school teachers and earned equal pay. You say here you had 4 kids? So didn't she contribute? I guess you are saying that she SPENT most of the money on herself? But two school teachers, with 4 kids, wouldn't most of that money NEED to be spent on family things? Even if she spent most of the money, (my husband purposely went into debts that I didn't know about, while he was planning his divorce stategy, because he expected to get divorced, due to his affairs with other ladies. I didn't know about that, so I wasn't planning or protecting myself. I think you said your wife also had an affair.) However, the law is, that if one spouse spends all the money or is ridiculous, then WE, the other spouse will be responsbile for that. I didn't get any "credit" my way, for all the debts he had, that he paid with joint money ...also a lot of it, without my knowledge. Or if your spouse decides that they want to spend $5000 a month on clothes, and you don't put a stop to it, by filing for divorce immediately, the court decides that you "agreed to that." That is just the way it is. My husband had an apartment he rented for his affairs, and a 3rd car, that he bought, to drive during his "other life" periods, he cheated on taxes, stole cash from our business, etc, but none of that was held against him, It was thought of, as I had approved it, because I didn't do anything to stop it. How could I stop something, I knew nothing about?

Life isn't always fair, divorce isn't always fair, especially if you marry someone with no morals or who would love to kill you for your money. I didn't have any way to realize that my husband was one of those people. Some people are very good at manipulation and lies, and covering their tracks. I hope to not have anything to do with people like that in the future, so I mostly, totally avoid people! That has been my solution ...it probably isn't a very good one, but one I can deal with.

Wish l had met you.

Thank you very much! That is probably the best compliment I have had in years!!

[hellodolly]

Sorry about my English! Im not a native English speaker but I was living in Australia for a while and this is the best I can do.

I dont want house, car, baby... I have 25 years old mate!

Of course I have money but Im not the father of any lady, of course I can pay some things but people have to work and/or study and be independent.

I just want to meet a good lady have a few drinks, hang out... And share good times, basic needs as well ... I dont want a wife.

So, OP, your English is fine for me, but I can read too!

You want to know where to meet a nice normal Thai girl. You don't want a wife. You want to share good times and "basic needs." You want to share a few drinks and hang out. With a good Thai lady, of course.

I don't understand why anyone on this forum is bothering with you.

So at the age of 25 he wants to meet members of the opposite sex, have a good time and then maybe get laid if things go well without falling into the hooker trap?

When I was 25 (and still now at the ripe old age of 38) I was thinking in the same way, I just didn't post it TV but each to their own I guess... Maybe I should of then I wouldn't have spent so much money on ladies of night, however much fun they are!

But the question, and the statement that human touch and sex are basic needs, are pretty much normal in the 21st century - we've kinda moved on from Victorian times, no?

I thought face book had replaced human touch.

Today I went to the movie and did a little shopping met three good looking gals. The wife wouldn't let me keep them.

Not really that sure about it but he describes the for hire women as the ones he wants to meet.

The normal ones want a home and a family. Every thing he doesn't want,