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Chiangrai Family Friendly HHH Run No. 101

Saturday 17th March 2012 Start 4-00pm prompt



Head South pass the Big C, at the first set of traffic lights opposite the Little Duck Hotel turn Left onto the 1020

Travel this road past Kilometre Stone 14.You will come to a set of traffic lights,TURN RIGHT at the lights HHH sign

Proceed along this road for 3 Kilometres and park up at the Reservoir HHH sign. Allow 35 minutes from Big C.

People do swim in this lake, so if you are up for a swimming hash afterwards, do bring suitable attire and a towel. Also there are restaurants in the area so the hares, Cop Out and Scotch on the Rocks will check out the possibility of an On! On! On! and get back to us later on that.


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Chiangrai Family Friendly HHH Run No 101

Saturday 17th March Start 4-00pm prompt

Hi all

The one good thing about the rain and high winds which have beset our beloved Chiangrai these past couple of days is that they have blown all that lung-clogging soot away. The air is clean! What's more, beginning tomorrow the weather forecast is clear. So we are definitely going ahead with our 101st hash at the Huay Sak reservoir. See driving instructions above. (There is no change from the ldriving instructions I first sent out 10 days ago.) The hares have proposed that we begin at 4 pm. The sun sets around 6:30 pm and we all want to be in and the circle done before the darkness falls, so please everyone be on time.

There are a couple of restaurants overlooking the reservoir and I am sure they will be happy to receive anyone who wishes to stay afterwards for dinner. Wild Woman and I are seriously thinking about doing that and we are hoping others will join us.

On! On!

Wirgin Bluce


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Chiangrai Family Friendly HHH

Report of Run #101: Saturday, March 17, 2012

Location: Huai Sak Reservoir

Hare: Cop Out and Scotch on the Rocks

This was a run of many firsts. Overlooking the hang-over hash last month, this was the first time, female hashers hared a route. It was also the first time in a long time, that the better halves of the hares neglected to come.

It was also the first time a Thai adult male had graced our run in eight years. Tak was one of eight virgins who showed up this day. He came as a guest of Tony who almost extinguished himself on the trial in the presence of On Fire. He complained about throbbing heart pains but it was nothing that another cigarette couldn’t solve.

It was a Goldilocks trail neither too long nor too short, or too hilly or too flat. Our two hares, Cop Out and Scotch on the Rocks recently returned from shopping spree in Penang and Hong Kong and they knew exactly what they wanted.

As usual Thaitanic and Flying Dutchman led the twenty-nine participants closely followed by Jet, a twelve-year old Canadian virgin running in flip flops. Jack Off, a hasher visiting from Istanbul was not far behind. As the end neared, they were surprised to discover Shocking ambling on well ahead. Following paper was never his forté but this time it seems he stumbled on the right trial by accident.

Thankfully the run began at 4 pm just after the heat of the day had passed. Most hasher took about an hour to complete the course. The FRBs finished about 15 minutes ahead. Anticipating the inevitable problems, your faithful correspondent had the foresight to lock the beer in his car. Fortunately there was a big lake nearby in which the drink-deprived FRBs could drown their sorrows.

The two Japanese, Lost Samurai and Mile High were as inseparable as ever. To everyone’s astonishment, Special Needs was able to walk 30 minutes without the constant attentions of Special Services. Marmalaid and Soreasses likewise took a break from one another. Best Man did even better. Somehow he mislaid the backsliding MANipulator and brought his friendly Rottweiler, now named Holly Bone in her place.

On! On!

Hash Sec Wirgin Bluce

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Chiangrai Family Friendly HHH

Saturday, 21 April, will be the 102nd Chiangrai HHH in beautiful Baan Doi Hang Nai with a 4:00 start time.

The trail: a couple of short hills, narrow rice paddy ridges (our neighbors’ rice so please do not walk on it--recommend any dogs can be put on leashes when traversing through farmers' homestead proper and rice paddies), some heavy growth terrain, couple of places you might need a buddy to give you a hand up one or two vertical steps, otherwise 7.5 kilometers of pure enjoyment.

Directions to Don’s Café: Starting from the Shell garage at the top of the Old Chiang Mai Road (Highway numbered 1211) in Chiang Rai, proceed about 1.5 km south until you reach the second set of traffic lights in Den Haa (Moom Mai corner). Turn right here. (If you see the “Sixties Bar” you have just missed it.) Continue along this curving road until you reach Don’s Café on the left side of the road. It is about 8 km. The blue Doi In Cee Stupa signs will keep you going the right direction.

From Don's Cafe take the Soi going left at Don's "Y" intersection (HHH sign). Turn left at the "T" intersection when you see the blue "Doi In Cee Stupa" sign (HHH sign). You will be behind a school with a smaller soi going straight. Turn left on Soi 1 (HHH sign). The main soi will turn right at the king's picture, and a wat will be on your right, as well. Soi1 begins concrete then becomes gravel and grass. A blue house is on top of the hill then Soi 1 leads to 4 mint green buildings. Our house is the first one. The road leads directly into our driveway.

Parking: Since the children of House of Union are away at their villages now, you can park on the complex football field behind our house. Follow Moo 1 and go between the buildings.

**The Beer/Water/Snack Wagon can park in our driveway.**

On On On at Don's afterward is only off the menu because Don doesn't have the staff anymore to offer buffets. I'll take a head count before the trek of those who wish to go there afterward so he has a "heads-up".

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Chiangrai Families Friendly HHH Run # 102

Location: Baan Doi Hang Nai

Date: Saturday April 21, 2012

Hare: Soreasses and Marmalaid assisted by Crash

Precisely at 4 pm the hare called the rowdy hashers to order, and sent them braying onwards along the track. Less than 10 minutes later the heavens which had been threatening rain for a week finally opened up and deluged its beneficence upon both the righteous and the rest. Fortunately the group was just passing a sheltered bus stop at that moment. Ten minutes later the worst had passed. Then Special Services boldly stepped forward well protected beneath a towering umbrella.

Not long afterwards came the first hill. Shocking looked straight up and decided that this wasn’t for him. Pat-on-the-Back rushed back to accompany him fearing that he might otherwise get lost. Superglue defied all expectations by carrying on without his mother.

The route took us through bucolic vistas but the price for such splendor was climbing and descending two very steep hills. At a couple of points the hares thoughtfully laid out ropes to help navigate the slopes but at one of those two lines, it was only the thought which counted as the tree to which the hares had attached the rope had since blown down.

The eight checks did exactly what they were supposed to do. By the time the FRBs Flying Dutchman and Fired Up found the way forward, anyone could be in the lead. Thus it came about that Superglue managed to slip by these FRBs on the last check and cross the finish line first. Congratulations, Superglue.

The trail at 7.5 km was on the long side and given the delay caused by the rain, darkness threatened to overtake hashers wondering about in the field. It didn’t help that being so environmentally conscious, Soreasses had marked the route using confetti paper which dissolves in the rain. So to save time the sweep, Crash indicated the way forward when the last hasher reached the check. Having only done the route once before, however, his memory was less than perfect. Thus he once again demonstrated the wisdom of his hash name, Crash.

As a result of much painful experience, the Lost Samurai had developed a strategy to avoid getting lost. At each critical juncture, he got out his camera and took a picture. Afterwards he was unanimously elected Hash Flash.

At the conclusion of the brief circle, Shocking proposed that all hashers who had survived the run deserve a down down. So we redrew an imaginary circle and recruited a neighbor to take the picture located below.

On! On!

Hash Sec Wirgin Bluce

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The 103d run of the Chiang Rai "Family Friendly" takes place Saturday May 19 beginning at 4 pm. Here are the driving directions:

Heading west from the fancy Clock Tower, follow the bend at the end of the road and then take left turn at the first traffic lights. Now you are on Old Chiang Mai Road. Follow this road past kilometer stone 7 and make a right turn at the HHH sign. Locals "Thai" know this road as the Quarry Road. Look for the large orange house on the corner where you turn. Go 2.5k along this quarry road and park at the red motorcycle with the waving hare.


Not all flat by any means, all are dirt tracks though, some a little grassy

All in Orchards and the Plantation


Initial part 1.6k quite a few hard checks for front runners "none for first 500m"

Idea is still to have every one together at 1.6k

Then there will then be a very obvious option to take a shorter route back or continue on the normal one.

Both the shorter and normal route will continue to have checks, but easier.

The idea is that the normal route will lead back in too the short route making it the last leg of the normal route.

This way those on the short route will be doing the checks for those on the normal route :-)

It could end up with the FRB catching up with those on the short route

Short route aprox 3k -3.5k

Normal route aprox 5k - 6k


Not a lot of shade. Bring sunscreen and hats.




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ChIangrai Family Friendly HHH #103 Saturday May 19th


The latest hash began with an added twist in that the first “checks“ or misleading trails, were cunningly laid by Hare Crash before the walking even began, for example by giving driving directions to turn at a non-existent “large orange house”. This may explain why the numbers this time were relatively circumscribed, but then again coincidence is not necessarily causation.

The route started at a very pleasant plantation, with surprisingly little litter and very beautiful long grass between the trees. The hashers saw to this anomaly by decisively bulldozing the grass with a number of large and heavy SUV’s and pickups. The site is now in “normal condition”.

The walk proceeded along a pleasant, wide path along plantations of tea and a tree species unknown to this reviewer. In fact the walk could well be recycled (excuse the pun) at a future date for a bike hash, since there are relatively few overlapping members between the groups.

The longer sight lines in the plantation setting allowed the back-running b’s to guage more easily where the frb’s were heading and thus to avoid most of the false trails.

Upon arrival at the finish line there was a relatively heavy downpour, and at this moment a technical glitch was discovered, in that, for nebulous reasons, the Assistant Hare, Shampoo, was in possession of the key to Wirgin Bluce’s car (are you still following me?), which contained the refreshments. And in an added twist, Assistant Hair, sorry Assistant Hare Shampoo was one of the last hashers to arrive at the finishing line. So the hashers found themselves in a situation of cold rain but no beer. Inexplicably some departed early, but again, coincidence is not necessarily causation.

In the end though the organisation of the refreshments was as usual flawless, which is only to be expected from the kind of person who carries jump starters in the back of his car.

The circle continued in its usual manner, with the consummate diplomat Shocking expressing gratitude to all those present for having made it. Conversely, some of those present felt the same way towards towards Shocking, since the solicitous hare, no doubt concerned about his legal responsibilities as the organiser, had sent the support vehicle to pick him up.

The Hash name Farang Friendly was given to the sole new member of the day. She was fine with the name, but didn’t seem to like the beer too much.

There were 4 out of towners, one being an American couple who seemed suitably grizzled and had all the gear to blend in perfectly with the crowd. Conversely the other couple, Jolly Molly’s son Stephane and his partner Gabriela stood out a little bit because Gabriela had omitted to bring Hash-appropriate gear from Bangkok and therefore came in an outfit borrowed from Jolly Molly’s infant daughter, much to the satisfaction of some of the hashers.

When it came time for the business-to-discuss rubric of the Circle Wirgin Bluce bounded up and insisted pedantically that Jolly Molly’s name should be changed, based on an obscure Hash custom that Hash partners have connected names. He then “spontaneously” suggested the name Blows Twice since Jolly Molly had once had 2 flat tyres during a bike hash. Har, har, har. Comes Twice attempted to counter-suggest the name Molly Comes, since Molly comes to the Hashes regularly, but was out-bullied by Wirgin Bluce and Shocking.

In retaliation Comes Twice tried to run Wirgin Bluce over on the way out, but unfortunately his vehicle was not sufficiently powerful and sprightly Bluce managed to jump out of the way.

Many thanks to Crash for organising an interesting walk and as usual to Fired up, On Fire, Superglue, Lost Samurai, Maple High, Able Semen and all the others for their good cheer.

Comes Twice

Hash scribe (pro bono)

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Driving Instructio​ns for Hash Run #104 Saturday June 16 at 4 pm # Run 104


The Chiang Rai "Family Friendly" hash will begin at the Twice residence on Saturday June 16 starting at 4 pm. Please see the driving instructions below:

Attached is a map to the hash starting point, which is our house.1. Drive down Paholyutin Rd from the city centre. When you reach the entrance to Central on your left, take the road on your right, opposite Central. After 300 m this road bisects the old airport runway.

2. Continue to follow this road. 400 m after the runway there is a t-junction. Turn left, you are now on Doi Prabhat.3. We are on soi 10/1 (between soi 10 and soi 11), which is a dirt road on your left 1.4 km after the t-junction

4. We are 200 m straight down this soi, on your left, white wall and black gate.

This part of the soi has deep mud grooves, so if your car has low ground clearance you are better off continuing on Doi Prabhat road to soi 11 (600 m further, on your left) and getting to our house that way. There will be HHH signs at both soi entrances. (Your faithful scribe definitely recommends this alternative for all who do not have 4 wheel drive.)

The walk will include a couple of river crossings over flimsy bamboo/tree trunk bridges, so those who do not wish to risk getting wet in the river can return home via a short loop and get wet in the pool while awaiting the others.

Swimming is encouraged, so do bring your speedos.

On! On!

Comes Twice and Blows Twice

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Chiangrai Family Friendly HHH Report #104 June 16th

This month’s hash began and ended at the so-called Twice Residence, so

it was more of an urban walk than a traditional hash further out of

town. As such the route was through some very degraded “nature”,

interspersed with numerous rubbish tips. Much like the other hashes


After some tense moments before the start attempting to get the

hashers not to park on the grass, things quieted down and everyone set


The hares had not had the heart to distribute copious amounts of

paper, so an attempt was made to stick together as a group. This

worked very well until the end of the driveway, after which the

hashers coalesced into a group of 5 very fast hashers, led by Blows

Twice’s son Stephane, and a group of 25 very slow hashers, led by the

hares. Blows Twice was possibly the first hare ever to do a hash in a

dress, but appearances can be deceptive, the hares were taking their

duties very seriously.

The typical organisational framework occasioned much tut-tutting and

head shaking from Wirgin Bluce, but fortunately he is no longer the

hash scribe.

It is correct that some hashers got slightly lost due to the absence

of paper, but it was felt by the organisers that it would be quibbling

to differentiate between getting lost due to the absence of paper

versus getting lost due to paper intentionally pointing down false


The first part of the walk was through the vacant land around Doi

Prabat. This area is not on the tourist trail, and thus is used

primarily by the local community for leisure activities such as

buffalo grazing, catching snakes, fly-tipping and the like. After

doing a loop through here we reached the first thrill of the route, a

flimsy bridge consisting of 2 bamboo trunks. Nonetheless, everyone

decided to cross except Shocking, who was desirous to return home for

a head start on the drinks.

The vacant land on the other side of the river was more of the same.

For those adventurers amongst the hashers who like to “buy” land

without proper title and build on it, this part of Chiang Rai is

ideal. And you can walk to Central! In fact you have to walk to

Central, because there won’t be a road going to your house.

The second bridge was even trickier than the first, due to a

pronounced swinging motion, but despite having cameras at the ready,

no one fell in, although On Fire picked up a leech. Some mastered the

bridge crossings more gracefully than others of course, but it’s not a

competition. Except for one of the hashers, who crossed a bridge on

her hands.

Back at home the business of the day was handled with customary

professionalism by Shocking, Wirgin Bluce and Able Semen. Blows

Twice’s son was on his 3rd hash and after a cliffhanger of a vote he

now rejoices in the hash name Twice As Long. These names are the gift

that keeps on giving.

The refreshments provided by the hosts (fruit) were slightly

underwhelming given that the outlay was only thb 1100, but at least

there was no issue with leftovers.

By in large the hashers were quite well behaved, apart from the odd

plastic bottle discovered on the lawn, and it is believed that no one

peed in the pool, at least not while standing on the side.

On On

Comes Twice and Blows Twice

As retired Hash Scribe your faithful ex-correspondent remains silent.

He resists commenting on the absence of paper which complicated the

search for the trail. All struggled to follow a lanky bald spot which

kept disappearing in the distance. While he acknowledges the perverse

creativity of the hares who insist on outlining in great detail every

twist and turn in the route to be followed, he confesses that at the

third turning to the left following at least four turns to the right,

he had no idea what the hare was talking about. It seems the ex-scribe

was not alone in his confusion. Stephane, son of Blows Twice who was

to lead the Front Running Bastards and presumably knew the trail,

also got lost. It seems Stephane has a talent for leading the FRBs

astray and in recognition of this skill, he acquired the hash name

"Twice As Long." His partner in sin, Gabriella will be coming up for

a name next time she makes the mistake of coming to a hash. May I

humbly consider that in memory of the fine hospitality we received at

the Twice residence at this June hash, we give her the name "As Long

Inn." Jeremy the girl who walks as much on her hands as on her feet

will need a name next time also. Any suggestions?

I will send you by a separate email a fine video done of our hash

by Virgin Jim.

On! On!


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Chiangrai Family Friendly HHH *105

Saturday 21st July 2012 Start 4-00pm prompt 



Head south the Super Hwy(#1) passing Big C and 4 way traffic lights at the#1020.

Continue along the #1 Hwy, pass the traffic lights at the new bus terminal.(Do not turn left to the bus station).

You will see ESSO gas station in about 300m on your left side, drive further down about 3 kilometers,

you will come to see another gas station(CALTEX) on your left side and the first HHH sign.

Turn left onto the paved Soi(the corners are the CALTEX and the Wat Ban Pong Sali) on your left side. (Do not pass the Wat, make sure to turn the Soi to the left at the HHH sign.).

Drive along the winding road in the rice fields and village houses(Moo baan) about 1.7 Kilometers.

And then you will see a narrow concrete bridge with the second HHH sign on your right side over the

Mae Nam Lao river(there is a small grocery store on the left) , turn right to cross the bridge onto the rice fields both sides,

proceed along this road for 500m ,and come to a narrow water way or an irrigation canal.

Park up along the water way. Allow Approximately 15-20 minutes from Big C.

ON ! ON !

Min Yamashita (Last Samurai)

Shinji Imagawa (Mile or Maple High)

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Chiangrai Family Friendly HHH Report *105

The July 21st hash was held in the rolling hills at the base of the mountains to the SE of the city. A brave ____ 25 souls turned up for the occasion as the weather had been rainy for the days up to the hash. Expectations were low because it was the first hash to be set by our Japanese duo of Lost Samurai and Mile High. During the briefing Mile High mentioned a long stretch of straight flat dusty road beside the main road that had the more experienced hashers trying to think of a good excuse to get away before the start but without an alibi, they were stuck. The beginning of the hash led on a dirt road through a forested area and numerous checks were easily solved by the early FRBs including Able Semen, Flying Dutchman, Crash, Fired Up and an unnamed hasher aka Moses. The young lads – Johnny Walker and Buffalo Bill were able to keep pace for the first couple km. Just as Namron was commenting to Brain Health that first time hares had a tendency to make checks too easy, Able Semen came running back, cursing under his breath “God-dam_n, TWO false trails leading to a back check!” Brain Health turned and said “those Japanese can be quite tricky, it looks like a completely different kettle of fish.” Sure enough, the checks proved very devious and kept the pack together as tight as sardines for the first 70% of the course. The trail was exceptionally beautiful taking us through verdant rice fields, over panoramic hills in fruit plantations and through cool deep forests. Our hares were even kind enough to run us through some thick shiggy so that No Name and Ranger were able to add to their collection of weed induced scars on their young faces. The weather cooperated and it turned out to be a radiant day (except for the FRBs who kept getting spanked by the checks.) Being the sympathetic bastards that they are, the hares finally took pity and made the approx. 1 km stretch of forested trail check free so that FRBs were finally able to break away from the pack. The last 1 km was indeed a hot, flat 1 km walk back to the circle but there were no complaints. By the time everyone returned at the circle, it was only 5:20 pm and the sun was still HOT so the circle took place in the only small patch of shade in the area. After Shocking did his usual speil and needed something to keep the circle going he called Brain Health into the circle and with tears of ecstacy in his eyes told the circle that we should honor the Chiang Rai founding father (when will it stop!?) Brain Health used the occasion to demonstrate that the Chiang Rai has was truly becoming an international affair with Japanese hares, British, American and Thai runners and an Irish virgin that he immediately took a shining to (since his wife was testing the limits of his credit card in Central.) However, when called into the circle, the hashers were befuddled that an Irishwoman did not order a beer, only a coke and not only that, she wasn’t able to finish it! Brain Health started getting suspicious and through his lawyerly questioning ascertained that the virgin was actually an American of Irish heritage (from the rotten spud generation) and at that point, the gleam in his eyes disappeared. The naming ceremony for Chompoo (Crash’s better half) was also a rather drawn out affair. Crash, being afraid of repercussions, did not assist in the naming at all. (Showing obviously who wears the pants in that relationship!) Finally Brain Health made the connection between her bike shop and bedroom behavior (Crash has not commented on this either) and she was christened the venerable “Pumps a Lot.”

The GM, Shocking, who was unable to do the run because of a sliver in his toe, did a commendable job of protecting the hash stash and the local beer thieves were only able to get away with 8 cans of beer before the FRBs returned. Shocking said that if it wasn’t for his black belts in Akido and Jujitsu the bastards would have taken it all.

Besides what turned out to be possibly the best virgin run that our Alzheimer infected hashers could remember, the hashers were also treated to a large variety of fresh fruits before the circle. The 4 young lads, Moses and Namron took full advantage of the fact that they were the only ones to have brought a mat to sit on and subsequently all the food ended up in front of them.

Another interesting aside in CR hash history is that it must have been the first circle with more Coke requests for splashes than beer - certainly not living up to our billing as a drinking group with a running problem! Wirgin Bluce, who has been working hard to come up with a hash name for the yet unnamed member of the Twice clan will be happy to know that since Gabriella did not show up, he will have a chance to work his magic yet again!

Scribe: Namron

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Chiangrai Family Friendly HHH No *106

the next outing of Chiangrai "family friendly" hash will be this Saturday August 18 beginning at 4 pm. For driving directions see below:

From Big C go South on superhighway to the next set of lights. Turn left onto the 1020 and continue to the next set of lights (turnoff to Santiburi Golf Club, ). Go past the intersection and at the end of the center reservation do a U turn (there is a sign telling you not to, but this is Thailand!) Go back towards the lights and you will see a road on your left, (there will be a hash sign there) take this, and continue for approximately 6 km. Park by the side of the road where you see my car, a white Captiva, You are there. Hopefully there will be a HHH sign on the car.

This is the rainy season, so please don't expect a dry walk!!! Depending upon the weather situation on the day, I may well have to modify the route to ensure you stay on reasonable tracks, as I don't have enough lifejackets for everyone!!!! There is one section where Nita advises the ladies and children (not the roughty toughty FRB's) to wear long sleaves and trousers to avoid getting scratched. Its only a short section.

On! On!

Thaitanic & Iceberg
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Hi Everybody,

Yes today, Saturday's hash is going ahead. The hare Thaitanic has looked at the weather synoptic maps and based on his twenty years as a merchant marine captain, has determined that while we may experience some light rain, the big storm will pass to the north of us. So he is out laying the trail as you read this.

Looking forward to seeing you all at 4 pm.

On! On!


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Chiangrai Family Friendly HHH No 107*

The August 18 hash was once again a welcome break in the deadlines- and stress-filled lives of the Chiang Rai expat community. Thankfully we have this venerable institution to be able to dress in casual clothes and find the time for a drink at least once a month.

Thaitanic and Iceberg were supposedly the co-hares, but judging by the sweat-drenched and slightly haggard appearance of Thaitanic versus the fragrant appearance of Iceberg at the beginning of the hash it would seem that Thaitanic did most of the work.

The hashers met off highway 1020 at the foot of the hills with the mobile phone masts which are one of the distinctive architectural landmarks of our glorious city so full of architectural masterpieces. Thaitanic gave a brief description of the walk which awaited us; the gist of it was that there was nothing to worry about, there would be only one fork, with an L for the long route and an S for the short route, and nothing much else to report. The briefing was clearly deceptive, sinceone group of 5 hashers got thoroughly lost, and within that group a sub-group of 2 (Comes Twice and Andrew from Australia who doesn’t yet have a hash name)got even more lost and ended up having to aim for those mobile phone masts in order to find their way to the road leading back to the OnOn meeting point.

Andrew and Comes Twice were concerned during their separation from the group about the anxiety their absence was surely occasioning the rest of the group, but upon their return it became apparent that these worries were unfounded. The only comment was from Nam Ron who helpfully pointed out that even the 9-year olds had made it back faster.

Four new members were indicted, sorry inducted, 3 of them being recently arrived teachers who have now considerably lowered the average age of the CR HHH membership. They rejoice in the hash names of Bottoms Up, Curly Beaver and, er, (*emails Wirgin Bluce and Shocking*) dam_n Beaver.

The fourth new member, who was christened Walking Wreck, does not lower the average age of the membership.

We were also introduced to a first timer, ‘Francesco from Spain’ who looked slightly apprehensive and didn’t say a word, possibly because he was having trouble following what Shocking was saying.

Comes Twice %

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