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Report of Run #51: Saturday, January 19, 2008

Hares: Helping Hand assisted by Hand Cock

Location: South bank of Mae Kok River west of Chiangrai Beach

Twenty five showed up for S2ATO 51st hash including twelve male adults and eight females plus four kids. As usual all the adult males were expats and all the Thai adults were females. The kids were a rainbow in between.

Helping Hand started the group off with a helping hand. Adolescents Spare Wheel and his side kick Dollar set a fast pace from the beginning. Unfortunately neither was particularly cognoscente of the rules governing the use of paper. They ignored the first check and happily led the pack for another ten minutes until Reverse Thruster asked who had last seen paper. At this point the group was in the middle of an empty flood plain which required the hashers to scatter in every direction. Doesn’t Matter Horn discovered a trail above the river bank and Do It Yourself ran straight up the steep bank scattering paper as he went. The crowd tried to follow but a herd of twenty cows began to chase Super Glue and Pat on the Back. Young Darling was first to reach the bank but slipped half way up. The sight of blood prompted the sweep Hand Cock to declare that the trail headed in a different direction.

The trail squeezed between the river’s edge and a suburban populated area. There were tracks crisscrossing the area from every direction. It seems our hares could not resist a crossing without making a check. Hence there were checks every 200 meters. However the narrow expanse of the coastal plain required multiple false trail lines to prevent hashers from falling upon “in” trail on the way out and vice versa. Unfortunately Do It Yourself unconstrained by the absent Do It Better, finding himself along on a different papered track, endeavored improve the trail by running in reverse order spreading paper where it was missing along the way. This created multiple parallel tracks adding unneeded complexity to the initial efforts of our Helping Hand.

In the absence of the beloved Nam Ron and Barefoot Beer Lao Bob, MANipulator declined to compete and contented herself walking amongst the masses. Between Wild Woman, Joy Stick, the two Oileds and Tight Socket she was rarely at a loss for company.

The booze was securely locked in the scribe’s vehicle. So FRB’s had to suffer with coffee at a nearby resort until Wirgin Bluce appeared with the keys. They quickly made up for lost time. Eventually G.M. Shocking was torn long enough from his bottle to call a circle. Ably assisted by Pat on the Back and daughter Boy Magnet there was never a shortage of toasting materials. The hares were so tickled to be honoured, in spite of their efforts that they danced a little jig to celebrate. Mark, son of Young Darling, was likewise toasted as a virgin. Young Darling got his name in recognition of his proclivity to preface all men’s names with “young,” regardless of age and all women’s names with “darling” regardless of looks and disposition. Various epithets were proposed for his better half Pom including Pommy Bastard, Pom Express, Old Pom and Old Fruit but the decision was put off to another time, should she ever reappear. Likewise Rob, who runs a pickling business, attracted names like Thai Prick, Thai Pecker and Pickles but as this was only his second run, the G.M. postponed the selection to next month.

Ever the long range planner the G.M. called Loose Spoke into the circle in recognition of his willingness to hare the February hash. Thus lubricated, the spirit of volunteerism flowed through the pack and soon Flaps and Do It Yourself came forward to do March and May respectively.

The G.M. expressed a desire for club memorabilia particularly t-shirts. Such items are usually issued to mark special events like our recent 50th hash or to recognize individuals who have done a fixed number of hashes like mile stones. The greatest challenge is to identify some graphic design capacity. Wirgin Bluce promised to inquire among other hash groups about how they got their art work done.

Flaps took over the circle in order to criticize Young Darling. The latter had polluted the environment by spilling his blood upon pristine bank side. He didn’t even stop to clean up the mess he created, after scattering red-tinted sand in every direction. With this admonishment to be environmentally friendly, the circle broke up to resume discussions at the follow up On! On!

Notes by Wirgin Bluce

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Here are the directions to the February 16th hash:

As you drive north from central Chiang Rai on the super highway, you will eventually reach the traffic light at the road to the airport. About 900 meters beyond the traffic light you will see Bandu market on the left and the pedestrian bridge over the highway.

About 200 meters past Bandu market, turn left toward Pong Prabaht waterfall and Pong Prabaht resort. There are lots of signs in Thai on the corner. The road is #1151.

After following this road about 7.5 km, it will make a 90 degree curve to the left. There is a sign here, marking a right turn to Pong Prabaht resort (but don't turn to the right – follow the road to the left.

After making the curve to the left, you will pass the Huai Luang reservoir on the left. About 300 meters after the curve, you should see the blue Soi 6 sign (and the HHH sign, as well).

Turn left onto Soi 6 and follow this road for about 2.9 km to the meeting point (HHH sign).

We will start the hash at 3:30. See you there.

On! On!

Loose Spoke

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Report of Run #52: Saturday, February 16, 2008

Hare: Loose Spoke

Location: Ban Du Forest below Pong Pra Baht Waterfalls near Huai Luang Reservoir

The 52d run turned out by some odd coincidence to be remarkably similar to the 41st run (March 17, 2008). Even the hare was the same. It started and ended in the same location although the routes out and in seemed to be reversed. The report of that 41st run is attached.

The hardest part of the run was finding the starting point. One was to travel 7.5 kilometers from the Asia Highway and then do a sharp left where the signs point right to Pong Pra Baht. That was our hare’s way of favouring those who can read Thai. The Huai Luang Reservoir was to be just around some corner. That of course is where we found the reservoir after traveling several kilometers along the road. Those who kept the faith and progressed this far, were then rewarded by a series of four reassuring signs as they drove ever deeper into the wilderness.

A total of 28 people showed up including three kids. Seventeen were farang of whom all but three were men. There were eight adult Thais, all female except for one. Nine were virgins, three female and six males: three hailed from England, three more came from Belgium, there was one Australian and two Thai boys.

All newly arrived hashers were immediately greeted by Hash Cash, Do It Yourself with his hand out to collect the meet’s contribution. Names thus recorded in his attendance list stand as concrete testimony as to how one wasted this Saturday afternoon.

The run began full of trepidation. The Hash Beer had yet to arrive. Her better half, Hand Cock confessed that Helping Hand had escaped to Chiang Mai but promised to appear before the run ended with his vehicle fully loaded with iced beer.

Some of the virgins never miss a trick. Uncle Colin loaded a back pack with water and compelled his ten-year old nephew Bart to carry it. Fifteen-year old brother Bond was wise enough to hide at the time. His better half Deidre avoided confrontation by turning back after the first hill.

Nam Ron accompanied by Bush Wacker and closely followed by MANipulator, Do It Yourself, Stoned and Pickled Prik set a fast pace up the hill. By the time they got to the second hill, they literally smelled the freshly arrived beer. Ignoring paper and the protestations of the sweeping Loose Spoke, they turned in the direction of the wind and arrived back at the parking lot just in time to welcome the belated Hand Cock.

The more virtuous hashers like Well Oiled, Doesn’t Matter Horn, Scotch on the Rocks and your faithful correspondent led the unsuspecting virgins around the well-littered course. All remarked upon bucolic scene while politely ignoring the white mess of paper which the hare had left behind. Virgins who couldn’t maintain this leisurely pace joined the stragglers headed by Wild Woman, Oiled Well, Boy Magnet, and Pat on the Back inevitably accompanied by Superglue. These recidivists finally arrived at the finishing point almost an hour after the short-cutting Front Running Bastards.

By this time the time the FRBs abetted by the temporary Hash Beer, had drunk far more than the club could afford in beer so the G.M. Shocking quickly called for a circle. The hare, Loose Spoke and virgins were honoured with the usual down-downs then attention shifted to Rob, whose name selection had been deferred from the last gathering. The crew quickly voted to name him “Pickled Prik” in recognition of his pickling contribution to local cuisine.

Past G.M. Nam Ron then took over and ordered this faithful correspondent, Wild Woman, Well Oiled and Oiled Well into the circle. Why, he asked, did these folks arrive late. Well Oiled protested that he did not arrive late. According to him, the others arrived early. No deed, good or bad, goes unpunished and hence these culprits were also honoured with the usual down-downs.

The business thus concluded the group broke up, led off by the hare, Loose Spoke who was eager to get away from the mess he had created. Too late we realized that the better half of Doesn’t Matter Horn had managed to elude a name despite attending at least three times. That outstanding piece of business will not be neglected at the next circle.

Notes by Hash Scribe Wirgin Bluce

As you all understand we have a lot of fun every month, the third Saturday. And you are all welcome to share !

:D:o:D

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Report of Run #52: Saturday, February 16, 2008

Hare: Loose Spoke

Location: Ban Du Forest below Pong Pra Baht Waterfalls near Huai Luang Reservoir

The 52d run turned out by some odd coincidence to be remarkably similar to the 41st run (March 17, 2008). Even the hare was the same. It started and ended in the same location although the routes out and in seemed to be reversed. The report of that 41st run is attached.

The hardest part of the run was finding the starting point. One was to travel 7.5 kilometers from the Asia Highway and then do a sharp left where the signs point right to Pong Pra Baht. That was our hare’s way of favouring those who can read Thai. The Huai Luang Reservoir was to be just around some corner. That of course is where we found the reservoir after traveling several kilometers along the road. Those who kept the faith and progressed this far, were then rewarded by a series of four reassuring signs as they drove ever deeper into the wilderness.

A total of 28 people showed up including three kids. Seventeen were farang of whom all but three were men. There were eight adult Thais, all female except for one. Nine were virgins, three female and six males: three hailed from England, three more came from Belgium, there was one Australian and two Thai boys.

All newly arrived hashers were immediately greeted by Hash Cash, Do It Yourself with his hand out to collect the meet’s contribution. Names thus recorded in his attendance list stand as concrete testimony as to how one wasted this Saturday afternoon.

The run began full of trepidation. The Hash Beer had yet to arrive. Her better half, Hand Cock confessed that Helping Hand had escaped to Chiang Mai but promised to appear before the run ended with his vehicle fully loaded with iced beer.

Some of the virgins never miss a trick. Uncle Colin loaded a back pack with water and compelled his ten-year old nephew Bart to carry it. Fifteen-year old brother Bond was wise enough to hide at the time. His better half Deidre avoided confrontation by turning back after the first hill.

Nam Ron accompanied by Bush Wacker and closely followed by MANipulator, Do It Yourself, Stoned and Pickled Prik set a fast pace up the hill. By the time they got to the second hill, they literally smelled the freshly arrived beer. Ignoring paper and the protestations of the sweeping Loose Spoke, they turned in the direction of the wind and arrived back at the parking lot just in time to welcome the belated Hand Cock.

The more virtuous hashers like Well Oiled, Doesn’t Matter Horn, Scotch on the Rocks and your faithful correspondent led the unsuspecting virgins around the well-littered course. All remarked upon bucolic scene while politely ignoring the white mess of paper which the hare had left behind. Virgins who couldn’t maintain this leisurely pace joined the stragglers headed by Wild Woman, Oiled Well, Boy Magnet, and Pat on the Back inevitably accompanied by Superglue. These recidivists finally arrived at the finishing point almost an hour after the short-cutting Front Running Bastards.

By this time the time the FRBs abetted by the temporary Hash Beer, had drunk far more than the club could afford in beer so the G.M. Shocking quickly called for a circle. The hare, Loose Spoke and virgins were honoured with the usual down-downs then attention shifted to Rob, whose name selection had been deferred from the last gathering. The crew quickly voted to name him “Pickled Prik” in recognition of his pickling contribution to local cuisine.

Past G.M. Nam Ron then took over and ordered this faithful correspondent, Wild Woman, Well Oiled and Oiled Well into the circle. Why, he asked, did these folks arrive late. Well Oiled protested that he did not arrive late. According to him, the others arrived early. No deed, good or bad, goes unpunished and hence these culprits were also honoured with the usual down-downs.

The business thus concluded the group broke up, led off by the hare, Loose Spoke who was eager to get away from the mess he had created. Too late we realized that the better half of Doesn’t Matter Horn had managed to elude a name despite attending at least three times. That outstanding piece of business will not be neglected at the next circle.

Notes by Hash Scribe Wirgin Bluce

As you all understand we have a lot of fun every month, the third Saturday. And you are all welcome to share !

:D:o:D

A big thank you for a very pleasant afternoon and especially to Sven for getting us to the start point and delivering us home. I would recommend a "Hash " to anyone who wants to find out what body parts have reached their "use by date".

We look forward to joining you again. Mike and Tip

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Hi All,

DIRECTIONS TO S2ATO hash on the 15th march near Huay Sak start 3-30 PM

1) Head South out of Chiang Rai on the A1 towards Phayao (and Bangkok!)

2) At the Mae Kon sii yaek traffic light intersection at Little Duck hotel, Turn left onto the 1020, towards Thoeng.

3) Set odometer to zero, or take a reading

4) Go thru the 1st set of traffic lights on the Thoeng road (1020) at 14.3kms

5) Don't turn yet, it's less than 1 km now ...slow

6) Go straight ahead over the concrete bridge

7) Turn RIGHT down beside the Wat (at 15kms).

- Sign reads " The Enlightened One Hermitage"

- look for HHH sign on RHS

BTW: (On your LHS opposite the turning beside the Wat you will see:

i) 49km sign to Thoeng, then

ii) a sala shop (wooden garden gazebo thingys), then

iii) 3 very tall radio masts.)

8) Drive 1.8kms out through the village on surfaced road

9) Park near the barrier at the "Y" (saam yaek) junction just after the end of the concrete road. Your odo should now read 16.8 kms from The Little Duck.

10) Run will start from here.

DIRECTIONS TO THE ON-ON-ON

After the circle is done, we plan to head off to eat at raan ahaan Plaa Pow Pak Sot .

Directions:

Go back to C-Rai

Drive north past Big-C

Plaa Pow Pak Sot has a red fish sign. It'll be on your RHS as you go north.

It's on the slip road beside the main drag.

Do a "U" turn.

Plaa Pow Pak Sot is now on the LHS (as you head south), before UBC/DSTV, well before Big-C.

Chok dee

Flaps

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Hash House Harriers

The Chiangrai “Start slowly and taper off “ Hash

Founded 15 November 2003

Report of Run #53: Saturday, March 15, 2008

Hare: Flaps assisted by Joy Stick

Location: Huay Sak

Twenty-one intrepid hashers showed up for the 53d run. Nine were female and seven of these were Thai. The rest were expatriate men including one adolescent. This is a good turn out considering that many of the core membership had temporarily abandoned Chiangrai for greener pastures.

The hash had trouble getting started. In the original notice the Hash Scribe confused everyone by announcing a 3 p.m. starting time. This was soon corrected to 3:30 but it did not prevent the Oileds showing up a half an hour late.

We knew we were in for something special when Flaps, the hare announced that the run would take the FRBs 45 minutes. Walkers might take somewhere between an hour and a day. A car along with some water would be waiting at the half way point for anyone who couldn’t make it to the end.

Square Rooter who had disappeared to Chiangmai after helping to found this hash, made a guest appearance on this occasion. Recognizing that he was less than welcome, he set off at the earliest opportunity pursued by Nam Ron, his dog Bush Wacker and Doesn’t Matterhorn. Finding the company uncongenial, the latter dropped back on the pretext of holding the barbed wire open for the following masses. However anyone after Swiss Roll had to fend for themselves. MANipulator knew better than to chase after such men. The exertion could spoil one’s makeup.

The trail passed through several orchards each divided by a series of barbed wire fences. Then it climbed steeply through a dense teak forest to a chedi at the top of a hill. Virgins Ian and Kelly foolishly followed Rodger and Ann little realizing that they hadn’t been around long enough to get hash names. Rolling, Stoned, Well Oiled and Hand Cock gave them space to avoid any debris falling their way.

At the half-way mark Joy Stick guarded water and melon but the promised car never appeared. After hopeful procrastination, Wild Woman, Oiled Well, Shocking, Pat on the Back with the inseparable Super Glue finally gave up and continued to trek. This led down to the Huay Sak reservoir where one had to crawl under a bamboo gate and slide along barbed wire fence to avoid tumbling down a precipitous cliff.

Substituting for the absent Hash Cash, Shocking wrote down the names of all who paid dues. All these showed up at the end of the day. Any cheapskates who went missing were left to pay for their sins.

After toasting the usual hares, virgins etc G.M. Shocking announced that henceforth until the anniversary in November the hash would begin at 4 p.m. The only exception to this rule would be the two Oileds who should anticipate a 3:30 departure. Flaps followed up with some comments on haberdashery. He began by warning that Virgin Ian’s pants which stretch below the knee could constrict movement. Square Rooter’s shorts which reveal a lot of mid-thigh is a commendable but unsuccessful effort to distract attention from his face. All might admire Wirgin Bluce’s sartorial splendor, ripped as it is with multiple threads hanging down like chads to knees.

The beer exhausted and darkness falling, the group disbanded to reassemble at the Jam Pi restaurant near the new airport for the On! On! On!

Notes by Hash Scribe Wirgin Bluce

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  • 3 weeks later...

SONGKRAN HASH

paddy boy and godzilla our back in town to hare a special

songkran hash that will take place on 12TH APRIL START 4-OO PM

> . So please join us on April 12th at 4 pm at

> Paddy Boy's farm behind MFLU. He guarantees you will

> enjoy yourselves

>

> For those in need of directions, drive north on the

> Asia Highway past Rajapat U. At the traffic light N

> of Rajapat, take a right towards Golden Pines Resort.

> Continue on that road about 10 km. When you see a

> monstrosity being built on a hill to your left (ie

> Great Wall of China), take a left and go about 2 km.

> Paddy Boy's farm is on the left. Look for HHH signs

>

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Hash House Harriers

The Chiangrai “Start slowly and taper off “ Hash

Founded 15 November 2003

Report of Run #54: Saturday, April 12, 2008

Hare: Paddy Boy assisted by Godzilla

Location: Paddy Boy farm behind Mae Fah Luang University

Altogether 24 people showed up for our Songkran run. This exceeded expectations. Fifteen were guys, including one Thai, Pat on the Back’s nephew Bill. Only eight women showed up and one child, Superglue.

The Oileds set a new record for punctuality. This time they didn’t appear at all. Also missing was MANipulator who still mourns the loss of Barefoot Beer Lao Bob. The absence of Boy Magnet was likewise keenly felt by the male contingent of our hash.

Wild Woman made her arrival noted by greeting one and all with some water down the back and Songkran blessings for the Thai new year.

The two hares were the last to show up. They appeared suddenly panting and dripping sweat. Apparently they had just arrived in Chiangrai three hours before and had immediately set out to lay the trail. Godzilla appeared particularly haggard. He used to be known as Stiffy before marriage and fatherhood overtook him.

Nam Ron, Do It Better, Belgian Organ, Ian Swan and Brussels Sprouts took off in the front only to be frustrated by the first back check which liberally interpreted the rules for trail resumption. With the help of some villagers the last became first as Pat on the Back, Nut, Rolling, Stoned, Super-glue, and Noi found the way forward and briefly led the pack.

The trail led through vast plantations of rubber trees each separated by barbed wire fences. Each required its own strategy slipping under, stepping over or sliding through the different barbed strands. To the astonishment of all, our fearless leader Shocking demonstrated the agility of a calypso dancer squeezing beneath wire.

The irrigation canals along the rice fields presented a different kind of challenge. Do It Yourself, Stuart and Pickled Prik hung back to encourage the stragglers along but being off paper the latter could find no way to cross the canal. Hand Cock, Rudy, his consort Mam, Doesn’t Matter Horn and Swiss Roll determined to go through the fields directly to them while Wirgin Bluce got distracted by Wild Woman who had found paper leading off in a different direction. The bamboo poles she placed across the ditch were strong enough to support her and Bill but they completely collapsed when your correspondent tried to follow.

Meanwhile among the Front Running Bastards, Bushwacker faithfully following his master Nam Ron, excited a herd of cattle to stampede. She was not so bold with a set of buffalo which the FRBs had to pass in the final stretch.

Sasha, Paddy Boy’s daughter greeted these FRBs with a water gun upon their return. By the time the last stragglers arrived a half hour later her hospitality was exhausted. Not so her mother Awe who welcomed us with hot dogs and fruit. Meanwhile Godzilla’s better half Maem was completely preoccupied with their 5 month-old Amy whose determination to drink shows a great hasher in the making.

At the circle afterwards the GM Shocking explained that we have free S2ATO t-shirts for anyone who had done six runs since the 4th Anniversary Hash in November. These included Pat on the Back, Super-glue, Nam Ron, Hand Cock and Wirgin Bluce. Pickled Prik, Ian Swan and his concert Noi were so taken by the beauty of the shirt that they insisted upon getting one without first submitting to six runs. For this pleasure they paid 200 Baht per shirt. The GM Shocking then gave a shirt to the two hares Paddy Boy and Godzilla as a personal gift in appreciation of their hospitality. These two do not live in Chiangrai and are lucky to attend two of our hashes per year. In order to preserve the uniqueness of this shirt, all had to promise not to resell it on Ebay.

One couple having completed three runs, cried out for a hash name. In appreciation of his nation’s musical tradition, Roger shall be known henceforth as “Belgian Organ.” His most appreciative wife, Ann thus acquired the name “Wants More.”

Paddy Boy’s father Limbo did not go on the run. He claimed he had done 500 runs over the years but now he is conserving his strength to attend church and repent for past indulgences.

Notes by Hash Scribe Wirgin Bluce

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  • 4 weeks later...

Hash 2008-05-17 16.00

Next hash will be outside Ban Huay Sak.

From Big C go south, turn left towards Toeng (road 1020).

After 12 km you come to Huay Sak, pass the traffic light (probably not

working) and after 300 m you have a temple on your right side. Turn

right after the temple (HHH-sign).

After 2.5 km you come to a T-junction, turn left (HHH-sign) and go on

for another 2.5 km.

Park on left side on the road (HHH-sign).

From Big C it will take around 30 minutes.

We will start 16.00 so please be there in good time!

Everyone welcome!

Do It Yourself

(Hash Cash)

:o:D:D

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Report of Run #55: Saturday, May 17, 2008

Hares: Hash Cash Do It Yourself assisted by Do It Better

Location: On road circling the Huai Sak reservoir at the Do It farm

Twenty people showed up for the 55th run evenly split between men and women. As usual all the men but only one of the women was farang.

Just before the run began, rain came down in a deluge. Hash Beer Hand Cock, Smoked Weiner, Polly Molly immediately sought refuge with Reverse Thruster in his car. They then headed off to the Do It farm where they promptly got stuck in the mud.

Meanwhile a brigade of umbrellas and raincoats set off in the direction that Do It Yourself promised one would find paper. Unfortunately all of the powder and much of the paper had disappeared in the rain. That hardly discouraged Front Running Bastards (FRBs) Nam Ron and Able Semen as they had Bushwacker to assist them. She picked up the hare’s scent and unfailingly guided the FRBs through the checks which had dissolved in the rain. Hence the FRBs arrived at the trail’s end in record time but did nothing to assist the progress of those behind them.

Second in were Stoned, Rolling and Virgin Christine. These three had previously been walking with G.M. Shocking and Wirgin Bluce until they realized that no one had seen paper for several minutes. The latter two retraced their steps where they found a washed out false trail sign. Meanwhile the ever helpful virgin ran forward and stumbled upon paper. Rolling and Stoned joined her and thus circumvented two thirds of the trail leaving the G.M. and Hash Scribe to worry whether we would ever see these three in this life again.

Cutting across fields in pursuit of the echoing On! Ons! Shocking and Wirgin Bluce managed to rejoin the main body of hashers. These were entirely female plus Superglue who as usual closely followed his mother, Pat on the Back. Thanks to the constant chatter it was not difficult to recognize Wild Woman who was accompanied by her niece Deuan and virgins Bee and Noi Na. Boy Magnet however was more difficult to identify in the absence of the usual male sniffers.

When the rain stopped Reverse Thruster, Polly Molly, Smoked Weiner and Hand Cock dared to get out of the car and follow paper backwards from the Do It farmhouse. They ignored the FRBs but when they came upon Stoned, Rolling and Christine they turned back towards the farm house on the assumption that the others could not be far behind. Thus nine of the twenty hashers arrived prematurely at the end and this accounts for the severely depleted beer stocks when the others arrived.

The first order of business upon assembly at the farm house was extricating Reverse Thruster’s vehicle from the mud. That done he, Polly Molly and Smoked Weiner took off before the Hash Cash had time to collect.

The second order of business was flogging t-shirts. The G.M. conscripted his daughter Boy Magnet to model it and succeeded in enticing Virgin Christine to buy one. Conveniently there was no mirror available. Christine will not discover until she reaches home that the t-shirt looks a lot better on the nubile Boy Magnet.

The third order of business was honouring Ian Swan with a hash name. In recognition of his passion for sailing, he shall be known henceforth as Able Semen.

The final order of business was recognizing Virgin Noi Na who hid previously while Virgins Christine and Bee were subjected to the down down. Noi Na excused herself saying she was talking to her husband in England . Then our fearless and most popular G.M., a Liverpool taxi driver confiscated the phone and told the distant husband exactly where he could get off.

Next month’s scheduled hares are Pat on the Back and MANipulator. However in the absence of the usual man to manipulate (Barefoot Beer Lao Bob), there is no certainty about the outcome. The G.M. will investigate.

Notes by Hash Scribe Wirgin Bluce

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can i join next one?

hello kumsamut

of course you can take part in our next hash,

the chaingrai HHH meet once a month,the next date is june 21st

so come along and have some fun,its for young and old alike

last saturday the youngest was 6 and the oldest was over 60

you can run the couse if you want or like most of us just walk the course at our own pace.

directions will be posted on thai visa

on on

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  • 4 weeks later...

CHAINGRAI HHH NEXT HASH JUNE 21ST START 4.00PM PROMPT

hi troops

your FAVOURITE GM together with PAT ON THE BACK our the hares for

the june hash that will have the FRBS running around like the headless

chickens they are.

DIRECTIONS TO THE HASH AT HUAY SAK

head south past the BIG C at the next set of traffic lights (opp LITTLE

DUCK )turn left on to the 1020 THOENG ROAD travel this road till you pass

KILOMETRE STONE ELEVEN 500 metres past KS11 take the RIGHT TURN HHH SIGN

that leads to a goverment forestry department (in thai) travel this road for

aprox 3.5k HHH SIGNS and park up by the forestry office

allow 30 minutes from the BIG C start 4.00pm prompt

ON ON

shocking

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  • 2 weeks later...

Report of Run #56: Saturday, June 21, 2008

Hares: G.M. Shocking assisted by Pat on the Back, Boy Magnet and Superglue

Location: Doi Puy Forest Reserve south of kilometer stone 11 on the Thung highway

This run hared by our most popular G.M. attracted one of the best turn outs our group has ever seen. Forty-one people including six children showed up. Among the 35 adults there were 18 men, all farang and 17 women of whom only nine were Thai. Ten of the participants were virgins.

There were so many vehicles that parking became a problem. Virgins Rafaele and Lek however found a novel solution. They parked their car vertically by crushing their hood down into a ditch.

Well Oiled and Oiled Well showed up ahead of time which led to some confusion. Everyone checked their watches thinking there must be some mistake. This and the late arrival of Nam Ron accounted for the delay in getting started.

This hash was uniquely blessed on this occasion by the guest appearance of its founder Brain Health accompanied by his consort Just Perfect. So long had the founder absented himself that the hash has been giving serious consideration to renaming him “Frigid” short for “Never Comes.” Displaying the leadership for which he is famous, Brain Health threw himself into the lead once the hare declared the run open. However following the club dictum “Start Slowly and Taper Off” he was soon overtaken by five- year olds Kenji, Smoked Weiner, Pauli and Neen.

This run had been billed by the G.M. as the “headless chicken” run. He accordingly gave the horn to the man whose head looked the smallest in proportion to his body. Once Hammer Head took off, we never heard the horn again. No one knows whether he was too far ahead or he couldn’t figure out how to blow the thing.

Nam Ron closely followed Hammer Head until he fell from exhaustion. Then the paternal instinct conveniently seized him and he turned back with his more faithful dog Bushwacker to search of his wayward son, Kenji.

Many of the Front Running Bastards (FRBs) were virgins including Stoned’s daughter and a volunteer working with the Hash Beer, Hand Cock. If Doesn’t Matter Horn managed to squeeze in ahead of the Hash Cash Do It Yourself, it was only because Do It Better was not present to trip him up.

The Piti Suksa Montessori school faculty appeared in force. Long-serving Dirty Harry showed up for his third run accompanied by Dao. Anne also came with her husband Rudolf. Yuliya and her daughter Pauli have finally recovered sufficiently from the 4th Anniversary run in November to try hashing again.

The trail was mostly flat but passed through a wide variety of flora including grasses which towered over the head, tunnels through bamboo forests and rice paddies. Wild Woman made sure she would not get lost by obliging the hare’s son Superglue to accompany her. Along the way she collected the other mostly Thai ladies including Noi Na, Lek, Swiss Roll, Rolling, Oiled Well, Joy Stick and Nely. Not far ahead of this group were Reverse Thruster, Well Oiled, Jolly Molly, Pat and John. The last named is Noi Na’s husband who phoned from the U.K. during last month’s circle prompting the G.M. to tell him exactly where to get off. Flaps made himself noticed by tripping the Hash Scribe and then demanding an explanation from the victim for the mishap in the circle.

Rafaele, Mickey, Ben and Yvon managed to avoid detection which raised questions as to whether they hid in the bushes and drank beer until the FRBs returned 45 minutes after departure. In any case they somehow reemerged in time to treat themselves to the fine feed which Pat on the Back had prepared for the more deserving folk.

Once again nubile Boy Magnet modeled the unique S2ATO t-shirt and generated such interest that our stock quickly sold out of certain sizes. First among the feverish buyers was our founder G.M. who could not get his hands on one fast enough.

In the following circle the founder G.M. tried to make amends for his sins by presenting super-size yellow “snake head” hash t-shirt to the biggest G.M. in our troop’s history. He also presented some Bangkok hash write ups, which he noted, neglects to give any demographic details.

Notes by Hash Scribe Wirgin Bluce

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  • 3 weeks later...

NEXT HASH SATURDAY 19TH JULY START 4 PM

Hi all We will be holding our 57th HHH run in Chiangrai at Phii Daeng and my house in Santiburi on Saturday July 19 beginning at 4 pm. To get there starting at the Big C go south along the Asia highway and then turn left at the first traffic lights (Highway 1020). Follow the signs indicating Santiburi ie around kilometer 7 turn left at the three-way intersection and then travel another 2 kilometers. Turn right into the golf course complex and then turn right again at the first opportunity. Now you are on the complex ring road. Travel 2 kilometers along this road without taking any of the turn offs to the left. There are no turnings to the right. You will pass a large pond on your left and eventually you will see a HHH sign pointing left. Turn in here. That is our house. Phii Daeng and I will be the hares. We will have some food afterwards. It would help us to plan if you would indicate whether you are planning to attend. On! On!Wirgin Bluce

if you wish to attend PM SOAP

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