Should I stay or leave Thailand?

[benj005]

I'm 45 years old. I've been in Thailand for a little over 3 months now. I have a Thai girlfriend that I'm currently seeing in Bangkok. I have a degree in special education. I taught in South Korea for two years and a few years in America.

I was supposed to leave a few weeks ago but my girlfriend talked me out of it. So here I am still in Thailand. I have a teaching position lined up for me with the typical 35k baht salary per month. I also have a classroom aide position for me back hone in NJ. It only pays $10 an hour and I'm limited to 29.5 hours a week. The schools do this so they don't have to pay health benefits. Although the NJ gig doesn't pay that much, it could possibly lead to a full time teaching job. If I were to stay in Thailand I'd be making 35k baht for the year without any room for real advancement.

I guess the thing that's holding me back is my girlfriend. I pay for the rent. It's only 6k baht a month so I don't mind. That's if I'm here working. Back in America she would still expect help with the rent. She would want $100-150 a month. The other issue is the thought of not seeing her for a long time. Getting her a visa so she could come to America is going to be difficult. She's not college educated. She doesn't have a lot of money in the bank. She does have a stable job. As for me I would be starting all over again. It's going to take time to show that I'm financially capable of taking care of her. It takes times.

I've read the horror stories of foreigners running out of money and going broke in Thailand. Or just growing old in Thailand as a teacher with no real assets, no medical and no retirement.

If you were in my shoes what would you do?

Edited September 29, 2014 by benj005

[Chicken George]

Live for today but save for tomorrow. . If you can't do that here go somewhere else. If this is not a troll post... By posting I think you know the answer. Go.

Arab countries pay well for teachers. Stay here and you wil go no where fast. If you have assets ie property back home you could ket it out and live here and work. Good lifestyle maybe. The girlfriend may want kids. That will be a challenge on your income..

[benj005]

Live for today but save for tomorrow. . If you can't do that here go somewhere else. If this is not a troll post... By posting I think you know the answer. Go.

Arab countries pay well for teachers. Stay here and you wil go no where fast. If you have assets ie property back home you could ket it out and live here and work. Good lifestyle maybe. The girlfriend may want kids. That will be a challenge on your income..

Not a troll post. I'm just trying to get a few opinions.

So much easier if I was younger. If I was 25 I'd stay in a heartbeat. I guess being 45 the thought of not having anything when i get older worries me a bit.

Thanks.

Edited September 29, 2014 by benj005

[Chicken George]

Do you have other assets. People can't judge your girlfriend only you can do that. Many people live here that are in their 40's. Good lifestyle for many.

[Chicken George]

I think you are wrong about being 25 and would stay. Better when you are older. Had many friends vome and then go who were that age. They live the dream then realise that they are getting no where fast and have to go back home and start over. You are still young at 45 and as I said you should be able ifyou stay be able to save.. if not go. Good luck with your decision. But do not let your balls rule your brain.:-))

[benj005]

Do you have other assets. People can't judge your girlfriend only you can do that. Many people live here that are in their 40's. Good lifestyle for many.

Its a great place as long as you have income from abroad. I don't have any assets. Zero. As I stated earlier I'm going to be starting all over again. I had a business and a house but thru poor planning and a death in the family everything was sold. Leaving only a little which has since been used up.

I guess going home would be my attempt to reestablish myself. I'd like to do it in Thailand, but I see a long road ahead of me.

Maybe I'm wrong.

[KarenBravo]

If you have to ask on an internet forum for the answer to such a life-changing decision............why don't you just flip a coin?

[NeverSure]

Social Security benefits are calculated on the amount you paid in for the last 20 years before you turn 65. You'll lose all SS if you don't work in the US.

Teachers get a good retirement also and there are places that need real teachers in the US. It pays pretty well.

You will get old and you will need retirement income or massive savings. You'll need to maintain an address in the US to be eligible for Medicare at 65. If nothing else, google for an address in S. Dakota. It's the only state that actively seeks expats and snowbirds as residents and it's legal.

[benj005]

If you have to ask on an internet forum for the answer to such a life-changing decision............why don't you just flip a coin?

True.

I just don't have a lot of support here in Thailand. My family and friends can't relate. Most still think Thailand is a 3rd world country, and most people live in mud huts. I kid you not.

[benj005]

Social Security benefits are calculated on the amount you paid in for the last 20 years before you turn 65. You'll lose all SS if you don't work in the US.

Teachers get a good retirement also and there are places that need real teachers in the US. It pays pretty well.

You will get old and you will need retirement income or massive savings. You'll need to maintain an address in the US to be eligible for Medicare at 65. If nothing else, google for an address in S. Dakota. It's the only state that actively seeks expats and snowbirds as residents and it's legal.

I will check on that. Thanks.

Retirement is something that I've been thinking about lately. The years go by very fast. Twenty years is nothing.

[Kabula]

Obviously you have not heard about all the horror stories presently going on in North American, formerly the USA.

If you were informed, you wouldn't think about returning.

Even main stream news is confirming all your personal sovereignty and country sovereignty is gone with Presidential orders.

Would you feel safe in a country with no constitutional rights and open borders?

Would you feel safe in a country that imports Ebola patients (for the first time in history) and everyone now confirms it is mutating and can be air born? Not to mention other suspicious, mutating viruses appearing. This is also in main stream news.

Currently main stream news even admits the new Presidential orders allow for you to be detained for even cold symptoms with no time limit!

Whistle blowers are scared and coming out of the wood work, including homeland security, top Police Chiefs and Army Generals and confirming all the facts now.

Competent trends forecasters, including an ex US Secretary of the Treasury, who have provided financial and political information to all of the top fortune 500 companies are forecasting the dollar to devaluate or even collapse at the end of 2014 or the beginning of 2015, along with major sell offs of the bond and stock market.

Even if you get a new job, how long will it last in a crisis and collapse?

Your reading the wrong books!

Remarkable.

Edited September 29, 2014 by Kabula

[benj005]

Obviously you have not heard about all the horror stories presently going on in North American, formerly the USA.

If you were informed, you wouldn't think about returning.

Even main stream news is confirming all your personal sovereignty and country sovereignty is gone with Presidential orders.

Would you feel safe in a country with no constitutional rights and open borders?

Would you feel safe in a country that imports Ebola patients (for the first time in history) and everyone now confirms it is mutating and can be air born? Not to mention other suspicious, mutating viruses appearing. This is also in main stream news.

Currently main stream news even admits the new Presidential orders allow for you to be detained for even cold symptoms with no time limit!

Whistle blowers are scared and coming out of the wood work, including homeland security, top Police Chiefs and Army Generals and confirming all the facts now.

Competent trends forecasters, including an ex US Secretary of the Treasury, who have provided financial and political information to all of the top fortune 500 companies are forecasting the dollar to devaluate or even collapse at the end of 2014 or the beginning of 2015, along with major sell offs of the bond and stock market.

Even if you get a new job, how long will it last in a crisis and collapse?

Your reading the wrong books!

Remarkable.

Sorry. I don't buy into the conspiracy nonsense. I worked with a guy in South Korea and he kept telling me the dollar was due for a collapse. This was 2 years ago. It never happened.

If the dollar does collapse what makes you think you're safe in Thailand? When America sneezes the world catches a cold. A collapse if the American dollar would affect nearly everyone.

As for Ebola I don't know too much about it. I do know it's very difficult to get. The person needs to have direct contact with the diseases. I didn't hear about it going airborne. Maybe I missed the memo?

Edited September 29, 2014 by benj005

[Beetlejuice]

Whether being 45 is young or old depends.

If people have no real assets or are not fully established by the time they reach 40, than they are old in respects of starting out a fresh and trying to build a future for themselves.

I doubt that the OP would have much chance of being able to take his Thai GF back to the States at the moment and settling down as a married couple if he has nothing there. I would say that if he can maintain steady full time employment as a teacher here in Thailand, then he has a chance of building some sort of lifestyle here for himself and his GF, at least for the next few years. But if the OP does not have any kinds of insurance or pension plans to financially provide for him in his old age, say 55 upwards that is not far over the horizon for him, then his future here is looking bleak.

My advice to the OP is this: if he has serious intentions of staying with his present girlfriend and creating a future for himself and this is not just one big adventure to him, than:place himself on a mission for the next 12 months, by returning to the States, acquiring a steady full time employment, then obtaining a bank or mortgage loan, purchasing a small apartment, anything he can call his own and once that is archived, return to Thailand, marry his girlfriend and get her back to the States with him.

Everything in life has to be worked at to obtain our goals, there is no short cuts or easy solutions and for those who do try to cut corners and prefer to live from day by day usually become losers later on.

Now at 45 years old, time is imperative, the sooner is better than later. So OP, it`s up to you.

[robertthebruce]

If you have to ask on an internet forum for the answer to such a life-changing decision............why don't you just flip a coin?

True.

I just don't have a lot of support here in Thailand. My family and friends can't relate. Most still think Thailand is a 3rd world country, and most people live in mud huts. I kid you not.

Actually "Thailand" is still a 3rd World Country, and there is still a lot of Thais. Love in Mud Huts...

If I was you I would go back Home, 45 years old is not that old, who knows what opportunities await you there, here there is very little, like fellow posters quote, Thailand is great of you have an income from back home, but to,try and make a decent living here, for now and the future, is not so easy..

Go home I say.....

Just my two cents worth.....

[longstebe]

Saudi is one of the highest paid places for teachers.

[Kabula]

Obviously you have not heard about all the horror stories presently going on in North American, formerly the USA.

If you were informed, you wouldn't think about returning.

Even main stream news is confirming all your personal sovereignty and country sovereignty is gone with Presidential orders.

Would you feel safe in a country with no constitutional rights and open borders?

Would you feel safe in a country that imports Ebola patients (for the first time in history) and everyone now confirms it is mutating and can be air born? Not to mention other suspicious, mutating viruses appearing. This is also in main stream news.

Currently main stream news even admits the new Presidential orders allow for you to be detained for even cold symptoms with no time limit!

Whistle blowers are scared and coming out of the wood work, including homeland security, top Police Chiefs and Army Generals and confirming all the facts now.

Competent trends forecasters, including an ex US Secretary of the Treasury, who have provided financial and political information to all of the top fortune 500 companies are forecasting the dollar to devaluate or even collapse at the end of 2014 or the beginning of 2015, along with major sell offs of the bond and stock market.

Even if you get a new job, how long will it last in a crisis and collapse?

Your reading the wrong books!

Remarkable.

Sorry. I don't buy into the conspiracy nonsense. I worked with a guy in South Korea and he kept telling me the dollar was due for a collapse. This was 2 years ago. It never happened.

If the dollar does collapse what makes you think you're safe in Thailand? When America sneezes the world catches a cold. A collapse if the American dollar would affect nearly everyone.

As for Ebola I don't know too much about it. I do know it's very difficult to get. The person needs to have direct contact with the diseases. I didn't hear about it going airborne. Maybe I missed the memo?

All the wild cards thrown out over the last two years, combined with crushing gold prices and non stop printing of US$, combined with holding interest rates at historical lows for a historical period of time kept it from crashing. The tipping point is near with most large foreign countries especially Asia and Russia avoiding the dollar. The Saudis are also about to dump it. When the dollar is manipulated at historical highs it destroys many countries trade as it is too expensive for them to buy US products. It kills US franchises based in foreign countries who under contract must buy US franchise product. The dollar is backed by nothing but promises. Ask China how they feel about those promises? The Federal Reserve is Private. Do your homework! It's not nonsense, but pure evil. Edited September 29, 2014 by Kabula

[meatboy]

Do you have other assets. People can't judge your girlfriend only you can do that. Many people live here that are in their 40's. Good lifestyle for many.

yes c.c.i was going to ask the same question.if he has to rely on work and salary then he has no chance of getting anywhere,expecially he has a gf.to keep.

[benj005]

Saudi is one of the highest paid places for teachers.

Yea, it's a good place to make money. I was in South Korea for 2 years, and I made decent amount of money. The thing is I'm thinking more about the money. Retirement, health benefits are becoming a bigger issue for me as I get a bit older.

Thailand is a great place. I really like the people. I live in NJ. The people there are OK, but it's nothing like Thailand.

Thanks.

[benj005]

Obviously you have not heard about all the horror stories presently going on in North American, formerly the USA.

If you were informed, you wouldn't think about returning.

Even main stream news is confirming all your personal sovereignty and country sovereignty is gone with Presidential orders.

Would you feel safe in a country with no constitutional rights and open borders?

Would you feel safe in a country that imports Ebola patients (for the first time in history) and everyone now confirms it is mutating and can be air born? Not to mention other suspicious, mutating viruses appearing. This is also in main stream news.

Currently main stream news even admits the new Presidential orders allow for you to be detained for even cold symptoms with no time limit!

Whistle blowers are scared and coming out of the wood work, including homeland security, top Police Chiefs and Army Generals and confirming all the facts now.

Competent trends forecasters, including an ex US Secretary of the Treasury, who have provided financial and political information to all of the top fortune 500 companies are forecasting the dollar to devaluate or even collapse at the end of 2014 or the beginning of 2015, along with major sell offs of the bond and stock market.

Even if you get a new job, how long will it last in a crisis and collapse?

Your reading the wrong books!

Remarkable.

Sorry. I don't buy into the conspiracy nonsense. I worked with a guy in South Korea and he kept telling me the dollar was due for a collapse. This was 2 years ago. It never happened.

If the dollar does collapse what makes you think you're safe in Thailand? When America sneezes the world catches a cold. A collapse if the American dollar would affect nearly everyone.

As for Ebola I don't know too much about it. I do know it's very difficult to get. The person needs to have direct contact with the diseases. I didn't hear about it going airborne. Maybe I missed the memo?

All the wild cards thrown out over the last two years, combined with crushing gold prices and non stop printing of US$, combined with holding interest rates at historical lows for a historical period of time kept it from crashing. The tipping point is near with most large foreign countries especially Asia and Russia avoiding the dollar. The Saudis are also about to dump it. When the dollar is manipulated at historical highs it destroys many countries trade as it is too expensive for them to buy US products. It kills US franchises based in foreign countries who under contract must buy US franchise product. The dollar is backed by nothing but promises. Ask China how they feel about those promises? The Federal Reserve is Private. Do your homework! It's not nonsense, but pure evil.

I guess you would agree with this then: http://moneymorning.com/ext/articles/rickards/25-year-great-depression.php?iris=252778

[JockPieandBeans]

Ben,

This might sound a bit harsh. It is meant to be.

You say that you are 45 years old with no assets. As other Americans have pointed out, your options for retirement benefits are quickly running out.

You have approx 20 years working life left. That is not a lot of time and you may be a long time retired.

Its time to get your skates on, sure live and work for today is a great adage if you can afford it. Think about the potential 25 years retired with no income.

You know what you need to do. NIKE. Just do it.

Good luck.

[CaptHaddock]

The OP should return to the US and, if the Thai GF is willing and able to relocate, he should bring her over on a K-1 fiancee visa, which will not be difficult for him to obtain despite his belief. He should finish his career in the US with wife working and becoming US citizen after the required thee years. Later they can retire to Thailand where their SS benefits will go further.

For him to remain in Thailand is to prepare for an old age in poverty. The number of English teachers here who have prepared a retirement successfully must be very small.

[benj005]

Ben,

This might sound a bit harsh. It is meant to be.

You say that you are 45 years old with no assets. As other Americans have pointed out, your options for retirement benefits are quickly running out.

You have approx 20 years working life left. That is not a lot of time and you may be a long time retired.

Its time to get your skates on, sure live and work for today is a great adage if you can afford it. Think about the potential 25 years retired with no income.

You know what you need to do. NIKE. Just do it.

Good luck.

Actually I'm not the only one in the boat with no retirement/ assets. The great depression of the late 1990s has wiped out a savings for a lot of people. We are seeing a lot of people (1/3) without retirement. Nothing. http://www.cbsnews.com/news/shocking-number-of-americans-have-no-retirement-savings/

Anyway, I know what I need to do now. Go home and restart my career before it does become too late.

[Gecko123]

This too is going to sound harsh.

First of all your financial prognosis is perilously close to 'go-up-on-the-roof-and-jump' territory. Your story would bring tears to the eyes of any financial planner and send more than just a few of them into analeptic shock.

You can neither afford to stay here, or bring your girlfriend back to the states with you. The last thing you need back in the States is a dependant who has even lower earning potential than you have. If you stay here, that's going to wreak havoc on your social security benefits. Your financial situation is so dire romantic considerations are simply not even up for discussion.

You mentioned the girlfriend is keeping you from leaving, and yet not a word from you about being in love with her. I thought that was very revealing.

My bottom line advice: return home alone, take the teaching assistant job, enroll in night classes at the local junior college, and get yourself the necessary credentials so you can earn a decent living. Consider, as mortifying as I am sure it is, asking your parents if you can live with them to save money. And, oh yeah, keep your eyes peeled for a woman who owns her own house, doesn't want to have kids and has a fat bank account. Normally I would never give such mercenary marital advice, but in your case an exception is called for.

Edited September 29, 2014 by Gecko123

[benj005]

This too is going to sound harsh.

First of all your financial prognosis is perilously close to 'go-up-on-the-roof-and-jump' territory. Your story would bring tears to the eyes of any financial planner and send more than just a few of them into an analeptic shock.

You can neither afford to stay here, or bring your girlfriend back to the states with you. The last thing you need back in the States is a dependant who has even lower earning potential than you have. If you stay here, that's going to wreak havoc on your social security benefits. Your financial situation is so dire romantic considerations are simply not even up for discussion.

You mentioned the girlfriend is keeping you from leaving, but not a word from you about being in love with her. I thought that was very revealing.

My bottom line advice: return home alone, enroll in night classes at the local junior college, and get yourself the necessary credentials so you can earn a decent living. And, oh yeah, keep your eyes peeled for a woman who owns her own house, doesn't want to have kids and has a fat bank account. Normally I would never give such mercenary marital advice, but in your case an exception is called for.

Thanks for the reply.

I have a degree in special education. I've taught back home, but my job was terminated because of state cutbacks. Because I was the last man on the totem pole I got the short end of the stick.

Then my mom died and I realized "Oh sh*t. Life is short." She was only 62 years old. So instead of going for another teaching position I decided to teach in South Korea for two years.

I have a degree. Its valid and up to date. I wanted to explore the world before I got too old. I completed my goal. Now, I'm debating on whether I should stay or leave. I think I will leave.

I do love my girlfriend. I'm trying to make this work for the both of us.

Edited September 29, 2014 by benj005

[robertthebruce]

This too is going to sound harsh.

First of all your financial prognosis is perilously close to 'go-up-on-the-roof-and-jump' territory. Your story would bring tears to the eyes of any financial planner and send more than just a few of them into analeptic shock.

You can neither afford to stay here, or bring your girlfriend back to the states with you. The last thing you need back in the States is a dependant who has even lower earning potential than you have. If you stay here, that's going to wreak havoc on your social security benefits. Your financial situation is so dire romantic considerations are simply not even up for discussion.

You mentioned the girlfriend is keeping you from leaving, and yet not a word from you about being in love with her. I thought that was very revealing.

My bottom line advice: return home alone, take the teaching assistant job, enroll in night classes at the local junior college, and get yourself the necessary credentials so you can earn a decent living. And, oh yeah, keep your eyes peeled for a woman who owns her own house, doesn't want to have kids and has a fat bank account. Normally I would never give such mercenary marital advice, but in your case an exception is called for.

yep agree with you to..

[meatboy]

Saudi is one of the highest paid places for teachers.

Yea, it's a good place to make money. I was in South Korea for 2 years, and I made decent amount of money. The thing is I'm thinking more about the money. Retirement, health benefits are becoming a bigger issue for me as I get a bit older.

Thailand is a great place. I really like the people. I live in NJ. The people there are OK, but it's nothing like Thailand.

Thanks.

just wait till the honeymoon is over,THEN WHAT?

[Soutpeel]

my post is going to sound harsh as well

45 with no appreciable assets, no slush fund or fall back position

staying with a GF who may or may not stay with you for the duration

relying on work prospects over the long term in Thailand which are tenuous best in the sense, of the "hire and fire" way things are done in schools here, which may be ok in some sense if a person is decently compensated, which at the salary levels you are talking about it's not decently compensated.

As careers go, this is the time generally in a persons life where their maximum earning capacity is being realized, ie this is as good as its going to get and you need to be maximizing that capacity

if you are considering staying in Thailand for the long term at the behest of your GF, you may as well start paying your subscription to the Pattaya balcony divers club , as if your not careful thats were it could end up, honestly I think your using the wrong head to think this through.

Not trying to p*ss on your parade, but you serious need to do some hard thinking as regards what your about to embark on.

[benj005]

my post is going to sound harsh as well

45 with no appreciable assets, no slush fund or fall back position

staying with a GF who may or may not stay with you for the duration

relying on work prospects over the long term in Thailand which are tenuous best in the sense, of the "hire and fire" way things are done in schools here, which may be ok in some sense if a person is decently compensated, which at the salary levels you are talking about it's not decently compensated.

As careers go, this is the time generally in a persons life where their maximum earning capacity is being realized, ie this is as good as its going to get and you need to be maximizing that capacity

if you are considering staying in Thailand for the long term at the behest of your GF, you may as well start paying your subscription to the Pattaya balcony divers club , as if your not careful thats were it could end up, honestly I think your using the wrong head to think this through.

Not trying to p*ss on your parade, but you serious need to do some hard thinking as regards what your about to embark on.

I appreciate the kick in the ass. I know the mess I've gotten myself into. Who knows. Maybe the US government will take care of people like me. There are a lot of us in America who don't have retirement due to the recession. I believe its a third of the population. A lot of people.

[HidyHo]

I appreciate the kick in the ass. I know the mess I've gotten myself into. Who knows. Maybe the US government will take care of people like me. There are a lot of us in America who don't have retirement due to the recession. I believe its a third of the population. A lot of people.

You got to take responsibility and control of your own destiny and not look to government or anyone else to take care of it for you.

-- speaking as tax paying American

[whiteman]

The $ is f---ck-- and so is the government you can not rely on any one except your self. go l;ive with your parents if you are lucky you might be the only child here so learn to grown a vegie garden. then wait to pick up a free house. Abit like stickman I bet is hoping to do. Best of luck get digging.