Phuketboy Posted November 10, 2014 Share Posted November 10, 2014 (edited) Does this only relate to teachers? If you are not suppose to be in a room alone with a female then what is your take on the following scenarios? 1) you are alone in the consult room with a female doctor or nurse? 2) you have a meeting with a female account or lawyer who works by herself in her office? 3) you are in a private meeting regarding business with a female? I call BS. I have never heard this, neither has my Thai girlfriend, her mother or any of her friends who are sitting here now. Edited November 10, 2014 by Phuketboy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AnotherOneAmerican Posted November 10, 2014 Share Posted November 10, 2014 If you are not suppose to be in a room alone with a female then what is your take on the following scenarios? a) you are alone in the consult room with a female doctor or nurse? you have a meeting with a female account or lawyer who works by herself in her office? I call BS. I have never heard this, neither has my Thai girlfriend, her mother or any of her friends who are sitting here now. Never encountered any of those situations, alway plenty of people around or the door left open. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DennisF Posted November 10, 2014 Share Posted November 10, 2014 Just read your post ........ And your a teacher ? ........ Read yours, 8 words and a spelling mistake. Let he who is without sin etc.... 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
siampolee Posted November 10, 2014 Share Posted November 10, 2014 Well my good man invest in something like this below and follow the sage advice offered below Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Phuketboy Posted November 10, 2014 Share Posted November 10, 2014 If you are not suppose to be in a room alone with a female then what is your take on the following scenarios? a) you are alone in the consult room with a female doctor or nurse? you have a meeting with a female account or lawyer who works by herself in her office? I call BS. I have never heard this, neither has my Thai girlfriend, her mother or any of her friends who are sitting here now. Never encountered any of those situations, alway plenty of people around or the door left open. Really, you never encounter these situations? My accountant is on her way and will be here in 30min and i am the only one here. I also had a meeting with my lawyer today and she was the only one in her office. I encounter this many many times. If I go and see my doctor, sure there are people outside but she is the only one in the room with me. At a school there would be children, other teachers around outside as well. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ClutchClark Posted November 10, 2014 Share Posted November 10, 2014 (edited) Does this only relate to teachers? If you are not suppose to be in a room alone with a female then what is your take on the following scenarios? 1) you are alone in the consult room with a female doctor or nurse? 2) you have a meeting with a female account or lawyer who works by herself in her office? 3) you are in a private meeting regarding business with a female? I call BS. I have never heard this, neither has my Thai girlfriend, her mother or any of her friends who are sitting here now. Call whatever you like...it does not change the fact it exists one bit. There are some glaring differences between your examples and the OP's post but I your mind is made up. When you get a chance why don't you ask those fine Thai ladies if they would have any problem with their husband hiring a sweet 20-something year old secretary. Not a bit of jealousy or concern about their husband alone with an attractive lady? Now I smell it too. Edited November 10, 2014 by ClutchClark Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
somchaismith Posted November 10, 2014 Share Posted November 10, 2014 I think that this is a moot point as it all seems to be specific to the OP's character. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post pizzachang Posted November 10, 2014 Popular Post Share Posted November 10, 2014 Just read your post ........ And your a teacher ? ........ That would be you're a teacher. Your post lacked the authority correct grammar would have given it. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KhnomKhnom Posted November 10, 2014 Share Posted November 10, 2014 The very real Thai modesty, etc., can be taken as repression of sexuality. Girls are taught to cover up and the pillows on the laps on Thai television is a sure sign. Usually repression of sexuality HEIGHTENS awareness of sexual issues (not "problems"). The Thai female is constantly on guard to cover up which forces her to think of sexual issues ALL THE TIME. This coupled with long tradition of not being alone with one man gives you the situation you describe. Just avoid being alone with a Thai female, simple coping strategy. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ClutchClark Posted November 10, 2014 Share Posted November 10, 2014 (edited) The very real Thai modesty, etc., can be taken as repression of sexuality. Girls are taught to cover up and the pillows on the laps on Thai television is a sure sign. Usually repression of sexuality HEIGHTENS awareness of sexual issues (not "problems"). The Thai female is constantly on guard to cover up which forces her to think of sexual issues ALL THE TIME. This coupled with long tradition of not being alone with one man gives you the situation you describe. Just avoid being alone with a Thai female, simple coping strategy. Great insight.Now tell us what makes the Thai male think of sex all the time. Its like the Thai mind is on sexual overdrive all the time. Edited November 10, 2014 by ClutchClark Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aboctok Posted November 10, 2014 Share Posted November 10, 2014 Ghosts and aliens totally debunked by the blanket camera phone coverage worldwide for the last few years.... So far nothing Why would anybody believe in anything supernatural?—anything for which there is, by definition, no evidence? With, as you point out, more non-evidence accumulating every day. Why? o_O If we had one baht for every time we've heard the ridiculous, "Well, you can't prove it doesn't exist," we could bankroll our own ghost TV show, complete with intense, close-up interviews alternating with talc-based comedy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
simon43 Posted November 10, 2014 Share Posted November 10, 2014 (edited) Sorry but in the UK this is quite acceptable behavoir. Does that make it acceptable behavour in Thailand? Off-topic, but a few years ago I worked for a time as a school principal in Laos. On several occasions, I somehow found myself alone in a classroom with a pretty, female teacher. Instances like these were not of my making. Eventually, I was discretely informed that when the local teachers found out that I was not married (and not gay), they engineered these 'opportunities' for me to get to know potential suitors (suitesses??!). I found Lao ladies to be pretty on the outside and conservative on the inside - none of the 'crazy Thai woman' syndrome that I've encountered many times in Thailand. It was a sad day when I returned to Phuket Edited November 10, 2014 by simon43 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lostinisaan Posted November 10, 2014 Author Share Posted November 10, 2014 (edited) Dear MODS, I thought that others might have experienced similar situations here. Please close the thread immediately. Now I've got the feeling that I took a bad ACID, when reading through. Shouldn't post stuff people don't understand. Seems that some of your pretty much out of your minds. Learning by posting. Better not. Sorry to all the Phuketboys and Pattayamates. P.S. This post was meant to exchange ideas how to live/work in this country without any bullshit interference. Edited November 10, 2014 by lostinisaan Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lostinisaan Posted November 10, 2014 Author Share Posted November 10, 2014 Just read your post ........ And your a teacher ? ........ Read yours, 8 words and a spelling mistake. Let he who is without sin etc.... Don't worry. Steven 100 is a special case. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DennisF Posted November 10, 2014 Share Posted November 10, 2014 Just read your post ........ And your a teacher ? ........ That would be you're a teacher. Your post lacked the authority correct grammar would have given it. Erm.. Isn't it more of a spelling mistake?? Agreed with your main point though! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SlyAnimal Posted November 10, 2014 Share Posted November 10, 2014 Thai culture is naturally very conservative, although the more urban you are, the more westernised you'll find people. Also Thai gossip, and particularly gossip from students, doesn't even need to be based on reality in order for it to be spread around. Gossip can completely ruin someone's reputation, particularly if the gossip is in their hometown. The teacher who told the group of interns for lunch with a Farang teacher was probably a little bit uptight, since there was a group of people and the Farang was married. Although as one of the girls was riding on your motorbike, that might generate gossip, as she should ride with her other friends instead (If there were 6 of them, I'd imagine they had at least 3 motorbikes between them, thus no reason for one of them to ride with you). Because the interns had been overseas, and likely been studying in large cities, plus probably weren't working in their hometown, they'd have likely been quite relaxed about the whole situation, however if they were in their rural village, they might have been singing a different tune. Although as the Farang was significantly older and married, it shouldn't have really been a cause for concern. Likewise for LostinIsaan's story, as he's married there shouldn't be a problem with him being alone in a room with the Thai teacher. But gossip in schools can be pretty far from the truth, especially once the ladyboys get ahold of things. e.g. At my school, there apparently used to be an African teacher at the school, and he used to regularly have chats with one of the Thai teachers. My wife (Who is an ex student from the school), said that she'd heard rumours that the teacher was shagging the African guy, even though the teacher was probably 10+ years his senior, and no one had actually seen anything. My wife had already finished at the school when this was apparently happening, but as it's a small town, the rumour spread quickly, and since the teacher is married, I wouldn't be surprised if this rumour had maybe caused some problems for her, despite not being based on anything concrete. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SlyAnimal Posted November 10, 2014 Share Posted November 10, 2014 The OP has requested that this thread be closed, however I believe this is still an interesting discussion topic, and may help our users to understand Thai culture a little better, provided it stays on topic. As this is quite an important topic, particularly for those who aren't aware of Thai culture in regards to relationships/gossip. The topic roughly being: In Thailand, it is part of the culture that a male and female teacher shouldn't be alone together. Discuss your experiences. If it deviates too far from this, then I'll look into closing the topic. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DennisF Posted November 10, 2014 Share Posted November 10, 2014 Oh Oh.. the OP has pram toys all over the floor. You guys are so mean sometimes .. where's the ROFLMAO smilie thing on here? Oh there it is. p.s. He spelled you're wrong too !! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
khh Posted November 10, 2014 Share Posted November 10, 2014 i would hate to go off topic but i want to point out that post #50 by clutchclark ("missionary" complex) makes an interesting contrast with post #20 by gopis108 ("foreigners are satan" basically). to globeman's post #48 i would like to say for the record i have met expats, in thailand and elsewhere, who kept/keep up the kind of behavior he describes for much longer than 2 years. we all have reasons for doing the things we do... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FrankOff Posted November 10, 2014 Share Posted November 10, 2014 its just dangerous being around people you cannot communicate with. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ClutchClark Posted November 10, 2014 Share Posted November 10, 2014 (edited) Strange, it seems like most teachers would come to a new country to learn about and appreciate the customs and people of the new country rather than ridicule and point fun at that culture. Then you'd be wrong... there are a lot of backward customs here (yes, and elsewhere) that really need to be dealt with. It is childish and sexist that a man and a woman can't be left alone in a classroom. They need to get over it - just like they need to ease off on the importance of "face" - and all the ways it hinders their social development. There is a reason this is referred to as a "developing country". How about in some countries where the woman must walk so many paces behind her husband? Or if another man sees his wife's face, the husband is obliged to cut that man's throat? If I happened to be teaching in a country that sanctioned that, I am supposed to appreciate the custom? Cambodia has a strong gang rape culture (google: "why-some-men-cambodia-dont-think-gang-rape-gang-rape" for the stats before you get your knickers in a twist over that particular claim)... is that to be learned about and admired by expatriate teachers as well? Some customs are pretty cool here and elsewhere, but nobody should be denied the right to question and criticize a place they are living in or visiting. By all means approach a new culture with some respect, but don't let that blind you to stupidities and some of the more horrific backward-arse practices (which, yes, I realize exist in every culture - which is rather my point.) I think you might be making the mistake of ascribing a little too much nobility to national cultures. A lot of newcomers do so... I've yet to meet one who kept it up for more than two years. Quite the contrary, If those cultural practices you described above abhor you so greatly then I would simply suggest you not consider relocating to the countries that practice them and I really wonder again what motivation you would have in relocating there except to spread your own version of "gospel" to free them from themselves and live in your likeness. As far as being blinded about anything or accusing me of ascribing nobility to this culture, the suggestion only proves that you don't know much about me and I have a suspicion about people in general. I have never suggested anything except that there are cultural practices in this country and its not a foreigners right to "change" them (as was suggested). The very idea reeks of imperialism or righteousness or atleast egotism. It reminds me of the history of the missionaries in the Old West coming to save the American Indians from themselves by teaching them the white man's superior ways. And for the record, I am leaving Thailand within a week and have no intent to return. There are various reasons why I am moving back to Colorado to live out my final years...not the least of which is that I don't really care for certain aspects of this culture--both historical and contemporary...so there goes your idea about that one as well. Its funny you use an expression like "nobility". Thats a word only believed by much younger and idealistic men than myself. Now if you would like to move back to the OP, all I have suggested fifteen ways from Sunday is consideration to Thai customs should be practiced OR the female teacher mentioned can find herself on the wrong end of rumors that could adversely affect her career at that school. I thought that was pretty much a no-brainer.... BTW, did you ever locate the percentage of extra-marital affairs that occur in the workplace in your enlightened country where men and women work together without the risk of romantic entanglements? Based on my 50+ years in the workplace I can attest to it being quite common. Cheers Edited November 10, 2014 by ClutchClark Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SeaVisionBurma Posted November 10, 2014 Share Posted November 10, 2014 Nonsense post removed Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ClutchClark Posted November 10, 2014 Share Posted November 10, 2014 (edited) Ah, here are some stats on office romances in the US. The study appears to suggest US society has some real problems with those mature professionals of the hip modern world being able to keep it in their pants: "...Romance can be ever present within the workplace and may be no further away than the next desk. A 2006 study by the Society for Human Resource Management found that as many as 40 percent of workers had had an office romance." http://www.siop.org/Media/News/office_romance.aspx Just maybe those old-fashioned and backwards Thais could teach the US a lesson or two ;-) Cheers Edited November 10, 2014 by ClutchClark Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
I Like Thai Posted November 10, 2014 Share Posted November 10, 2014 Wasn't this song banned because it suggested that a girl fell asleep with her boyfriend. In all cultures, the older generation are more conservative and will have beliefs that the younger generation may not subscribe to. Thailand is no different in that it's older generation are more conservative like America was back in the 50's and later https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4X7b2E_Jq-k Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lostinisaan Posted November 11, 2014 Author Share Posted November 11, 2014 The OP has requested that this thread be closed, however I believe this is still an interesting discussion topic, and may help our users to understand Thai culture a little better, provided it stays on topic. As this is quite an important topic, particularly for those who aren't aware of Thai culture in regards to relationships/gossip. The topic roughly being: In Thailand, it is part of the culture that a male and female teacher shouldn't be alone together. Discuss your experiences. If it deviates too far from this, then I'll look into closing the topic. It might be very helpful to pass the new Thai culture and ghost buster course for teechaas as well. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scott Posted November 11, 2014 Share Posted November 11, 2014 I think this thread has passed its Use-by date. //CLOSED// Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lostinisaan Posted November 11, 2014 Author Share Posted November 11, 2014 I think this thread has passed its Use-by date. //CLOSED// Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Saan Posted November 11, 2014 Share Posted November 11, 2014 The Rev. Billy Graham once said something like: "A man should never be alone in a room with a woman." So did Jimmy Swaggart. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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