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Should Expats Advise Rude Tourists To Behave?


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In the lobby at Chiangmai Ram hospital today, a loud and belligerent German man (about 60 y.o.) was berating the girl at the bill counter over a trivial matter. He told her she was "stupid" and that she was to "shut up" while he was speaking [nonsense]. He went on and on.

I was sitting, infuriated, with my wife and infant son, waiting for our turn to pay. I decided to speak with him and did so. Believing that two rude people don't make a rude situation into a polite one, I respectfully asked him to refrain from using inappropraite language as he was disturbing people. (In my mind's eye, however, I was clubbing him over the head with a blunt instrument.) He grunted and then continued berating the girl.

My wife was unhappy with me for getting involved. I explained that it was very different situation from a drunken brawl in a bar and I was obliged to say something. She countered that, as a former tour guide, she dealt with these types frequently and believed that intervention was useless.

So who is right?

And one more thing ... I mentioned the idiot was German only because I am not. If encountering a fellow countryman, my respoonse would have been more harsh, I think!

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In the lobby at Chiangmai Ram hospital today, a loud and belligerent German man (about 60 y.o.) was berating the girl at the bill counter over a trivial matter. He told her she was "stupid" and that she was to "shut up" while he was speaking [nonsense]. He went on and on.

I was sitting, infuriated, with my wife and infant son, waiting for our turn to pay. I decided to speak with him and did so. Believing that two rude people don't make a rude situation into a polite one, I respectfully asked him to refrain from using inappropraite language as he was disturbing people. (In my mind's eye, however, I was clubbing him over the head with a blunt instrument.) He grunted and then continued berating the girl.

My wife was unhappy with me for getting involved. I explained that it was very different situation from a drunken brawl in a bar and I was obliged to say something. She countered that, as a former tour guide, she dealt with these types frequently and believed that intervention was useless.

So who is right?

And one more thing ... I mentioned the idiot was German only because I am not. If encountering a fellow countryman, my respoonse would have been more harsh, I think!

I too would have spoken up, I don't think that I would have been as nice though. I'd have told him that acting as he was, he was an embarrassment to himself and other foreigners. I don't think that there is ever an excuse for bad behavior.

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Yeah, I know your dilemma first-hand. A near identical situation happened to me, except the offending party wouldn't admit his nationality, but I suspect German.

Almost the same scene: loudly and harshly berating the female waitresses in Pita Pan, on Sukhumvit. I could not stand it anymore, so I intervened, which of course he then took an invitation to berate me. That didn't work out as well for him, though.

But, the waitstaff did retreat into a neutral position well away from both of crazy foreigners.

Happened another time on the BTS: young Italian backpakers were talking so loudly and rudely on the skytrain, that the discomfort and displeasure were visible on every Thai face around them. I tried to softly alert them to that fact, until they tried to get rude with me. Finally, they said they didn't care if they were offensive to people around them. I asked them why they bother to travel in that case, why didn't they just save their money and stay home?

That quieted them, but about three youngish Thai women broke out laughing, and I got the impression they were laughing at me. But, mai bpen lai, because I know from gestures after the fact that a few older Thai people on the train were grateful.

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In the lobby at Chiangmai Ram hospital today, a loud and belligerent German man (about 60 y.o.) was berating the girl at the bill counter over a trivial matter. He told her she was "stupid" and that she was to "shut up" while he was speaking [nonsense]. He went on and on.

Impossible for us farang to imagine how much face she lost. She may now have a negative idea about other farang and decide that before she loses her face she'll make them (us) lose theirs first - pretend she doesn't understand, smile and walk away...

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Interesting I watched a programme last night (UK) that concluded that 80% of people in the UK would not intervene to stop load and rude behavior in restraunts or on trains because;

a) they were embarrased

:o They were frightened about repercussions

IMHO if someone is ignorant enough to berate another person in public, especially farang to Thai female then intervention would not alter his future behavior, albeit would stop the Kno*head in that particular instance

So yes I think you are correct in getting involed

Johnb

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You might consider starting a business instead. You could prepare a number of signs that read "No Germans" and offer, after the offending farang has vanished, to sell them, at a reasonably healthy price, to the victimized establishment. :o

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You might consider starting a business instead. You could prepare a number of signs that read "No Germans" and offer, after the offending farang has vanished, to sell them, at a reasonably healthy price, to the victimized establishment. :o

OK, now we're getting somewhere. Maybe a sign stating "no Germans over 50, No Israelis under 30", and if I had my way, "no children with those annoying handheld video games".

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You may have missed it, Lannarebirth, but I think we have been told by the powers-that-be to drop this line of facetiousness.

Ooooh, gotcha. I did miss it, sorry. Anyway...

It's funny, when I come across a rude foreigner, especially an American (like me) I DO feel compelled to put them right regarding treating others respectfully. My Thai GF says it's not my business and I shouldn't get involved. BUT here's the thing! When she finds a Thai being disrespectful to a foreigner, she's all over them like white on rice. Meanwhile I'M thinking she should mind her own business, not knowing the context of the dispute. So, I guess none of us like others to cast our nationality (whichever) in a bad light.

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Good smacking is prob what would be needed. I think anything less, prob the ignorant c*nt wouldnt get through his thick skull on what proper behaviour is and how to deal with issues without berating the thai staff. :o

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