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Should Expats Advise Rude Tourists To Behave?


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I reckon the best way to handle the situation the OP describes would be to go and offer assistance..

Eg.. say to the rude person " are you having some trouble, maybe I can help ?" .. try to diffuse the situation that way.

totster :D

Would you do that in Britian with a disagreement between two Brits? Just curious.

There is a difference I suppose as you would imagine two brits to be communicating fluently and understanding each other perfectly.

If you see a Thai and a tourist argue then maybe you can help diffuse the situation by helping to translate if they are having communication difficulties. Maybe its one of those 'typical Thai problems', the ones that may have got you hot under the collar when you first encountered them but have learned how to deal with easily now and you can pass that experience onto the tourist and calm it down that way. If you see a situation that escalates out of hand then first you need to understand exactly what's going on, before deciding how to deal with it.

Attacking someone because they said 'shut up' to a woman and called her 'stupid' when you know nothing more of the situation is crazy behavior, and quite rightly illegal.

Deciding the German is in the wrong because you wish to protect the Thai woman white knight style is foolish. Deciding the German is wrong because you have only heard him speak, and are assuming that the Thai woman is not at fault in anyway is stupid.

You should remember this is a hospital, it can be a very stressful situation for some people and who knows why he was there? Family member sick? Just heard he had 6 months to live? Perhaps he's just been overcharged by 20 k on a hospital bill and he's getting scammed before your eyes?

Of course by now Brit would have gone in like a bull in a china shop and either smacked someone or got smacked himself and it'd just be more english and german tourists fighting in Thailand. :o

I'm going to go way out on a limb here... could you possibly be a German with a huge chip on your shoulder? Who cares what nationality the stupid tourist was. No-one should be forced to endure verbal abuse from a tourist. I wouldn't care where they're from. I could become personal here as you do, or I could get hackles up at the way you talk about Brits, and though you haven't slammed Americans yet, I wouldn't be shocked. Maybe you'd have different views about the tourist yelling at the girl in the hospital if the tourist were British, American or better yet, Jewish. It shouldn't matter what nationality someone is, wrong is wrong.

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BKK - you know and I know quite well calling a thai person stupid and shutup isnt going to help the situation infact it will only make them less inclined to sort the situation out.

We do know that Brit, we could step in an explain that even, and maybe it'll diffuse the situation.

No need to be rude and abusive - this is what I am calling attention to

No need to be violent, this is what I am calling attention to.

:o

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I'm going to go way out on a limb here... could you possibly be a German with a huge chip on your shoulder? Who cares what nationality the stupid tourist was. No-one should be forced to endure verbal abuse from a tourist. I wouldn't care where they're from. I could become personal here as you do, or I could get hackles up at the way you talk about Brits, and though you haven't slammed Americans yet, I wouldn't be shocked. Maybe you'd have different views about the tourist yelling at the girl in the hospital if the tourist were British, American or better yet, Jewish. It shouldn't matter what nationality someone is, wrong is wrong.

I'm 100% British and I'm making the shocking suggestion that beating up someone in a hospital is probably not the best solution for this problem. :o

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I'm going to go way out on a limb here... could you possibly be a German with a huge chip on your shoulder? Who cares what nationality the stupid tourist was. No-one should be forced to endure verbal abuse from a tourist. I wouldn't care where they're from. I could become personal here as you do, or I could get hackles up at the way you talk about Brits, and though you haven't slammed Americans yet, I wouldn't be shocked. Maybe you'd have different views about the tourist yelling at the girl in the hospital if the tourist were British, American or better yet, Jewish. It shouldn't matter what nationality someone is, wrong is wrong.

I'm 100% British and I'm making the shocking suggestion that beating up someone in a hospital is probably not the best solution for this problem. :o

I don't believe that anyone suggested beating the guy up in the hospital, I believe the question was, "Would you intervene?". Intervention could be verbal and should be done with tact. I don't believe that anyone suggested to punch the guy. I'll admit, that some people went off on a tangient and talked about physical abuse towards a spouse, that's a totally different situation. Verbal tactics generally don't work there. I commented in that vein a while back, which recieved a stinging reply from you.

I've diffused many difficult confrontations here amongst some of my drivers and others here in Iraq and Kuwait. While I always try to find peaceful and sometimes humorous ways to diffuse volatile situations, I'm not naive enough to think that there aren't times where physical intervention is the only way possible. Sometimes it's the only way... If a man is beating his wife in public, he's not apt to respond to a polite query; "Hello Mister, would kindly stop assaulting your beloved in public? It's disturbing me." Sometimes a perfectly placed tap on the chin will work wonders and create a peaceful atmosphere instantly.

Peaceniks and Pacificsts are good in their place, but they must realize that their aversion to all physical confrontations didn't change the world. Soldiers had to fight and die to guarantee that freedom. We all have to look for a peaceful solution to our problems, but we can't turn a blind eye and point a finger at those that are willing to "fight" for it. Peaceniks need to have a safe platform to preach from.

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I don't believe that anyone suggested beating the guy up in the hospital, I believe the question was, "Would you intervene?". I don't believe that anyone suggested to punch the guy.

I was refering of course to Brits posts.

Good smacking is prob what would be needed.

In which he already decided what level of a smacking the guy would need (love the cool dude gif Brit). :o

One would be sufficient..... cool.gif

Soic, my reply to you was because you started to talk about men beating up women and how you would protect them by beating up the men. Thats all fair enough, but not the case here. The question is "Should expats advise rude tourists on how to behave" not "Should expats defend women against violent tourists." :D

While I always try to find peaceful and sometimes humorous ways to diffuse volatile situations, I'm not naive enough to think that there aren't times where physical intervention is the only way possible. Sometimes it's the only way... If a man is beating his wife in public, he's not apt to respond to a polite query; "Hello Mister, would kindly stop assaulting your beloved in public? It's disturbing me." Sometimes a perfectly placed tap on the chin will work wonders and create a peaceful atmosphere instantly.

I quite agree. But I'm not confusing a rude tourist with a wife beater here.

Peaceniks and Pacificsts are good in their place, but they must realize that their aversion to all physical confrontations didn't change the world. Soldiers had to fight and die to guarantee that freedom. We all have to look for a peaceful solution to our problems, but we can't turn a blind eye and point a finger at those that are willing to "fight" for it. Peaceniks need to have a safe platform to preach from.

I'm no pacifist but I think just because a tourist called a woman stupid then smacking that guy in the skull is not 'probably what's needed'.

So perhaps we could forget about soldiers, wars and wife beaters for just a second and go back to the original question. :D

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Not so sure your idea of solving the problem would improve the hospital staff's general image of Westerners.

I recall a number of years ago when I was in Pattaya with my good mate the Mysterious Aussie who was once involved in The Escape. We were in an open fronted bar at about midday having a quiet beer whilst watching the world go by.

Unfortunately the peace and tranquility of the establishment was shattered by a loud mouthed drunken scandanavian who was verbally abusing his wife (also scandanavian). This abuse turned physical when he slapped her across the face. My mate the Mysterious Aussie being an ex-cop was fairly piste off by this behaviour but held back. The staff of the bar were also piste off with this clown and when one of the girls told him to leave he had a swing at her as well. That was enough to set my mate off. He confronted the guy saying if he wanted to belt someone around to try him. One swing from the scandanvian was followed by numerous from the Mysterious Aussie which resulted in the aggressor finding himself semi-conscious on the footpath outside the bar.

Not only did the wife of the scandanavian thank the Mysterious Aussie but so did all the staff of the bar and numerous shop and other bar staff along the street. Apparently this clown had been causing trouble in a number of other establishments over a few days.

Fair enough, but that is a different situation than the one described in the OP.

The Scandinavian guy got violent first, and then responded to with violence to the staff's request that he leave. In that situation I might have done the same as your Mysterious Aussie friend, or at any rate I would not have thought it wrong to get physical. Each situation merits its own response.

When words are sufficient, why use violence? Especially when you may have an unclear idea of what the underlying reasons are, as in the OP. It is possible that the hospital had made a major mistake which had caused major complications for himself or for one of his loved ones. People in shock can get aggressive as a defense mechanism... etc.

Now once you try to defuse the situation with words and the other party gets violent, you might consider to respond in kind.

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Not so sure your idea of solving the problem would improve the hospital staff's general image of Westerners.

I recall a number of years ago when I was in Pattaya with my good mate the Mysterious Aussie who was once involved in The Escape. We were in an open fronted bar at about midday having a quiet beer whilst watching the world go by.

Unfortunately the peace and tranquility of the establishment was shattered by a loud mouthed drunken scandanavian who was verbally abusing his wife (also scandanavian). This abuse turned physical when he slapped her across the face. My mate the Mysterious Aussie being an ex-cop was fairly piste off by this behaviour but held back. The staff of the bar were also piste off with this clown and when one of the girls told him to leave he had a swing at her as well. That was enough to set my mate off. He confronted the guy saying if he wanted to belt someone around to try him. One swing from the scandanvian was followed by numerous from the Mysterious Aussie which resulted in the aggressor finding himself semi-conscious on the footpath outside the bar.

Not only did the wife of the scandanavian thank the Mysterious Aussie but so did all the staff of the bar and numerous shop and other bar staff along the street. Apparently this clown had been causing trouble in a number of other establishments over a few days.

Sometimes this is the only course of action when beligerent drunks are involved. I remember this story from the partner in The Escape. He told me there was no alternative. He seemed like a pretty cool tempered sort of a guy so the drunk must have really deserved what he got.

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BKK - when I stated a good smacking was involved - thats what he deserved. Knock some sense in him? More thinking out loud, def not a first measure more a last resort if assaulted first. Hope that clears up the confusion.

I'd surely have a chat with him and explain the proper way to behave and def so to embarrass him. Now if a smacking is in order - he's have to try and attempt to assault me first. This lad is far from stupid. :o

99% of time lads will listen to reason because of being embarrassed however 1% don't and thats when they take your lil chat as a provocation for an assault.

Edited by britmaveric
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BKK - when I stated a good smacking was involved - thats what he deserved. Knock some sense in him? More thinking out loud, def not a first measure more a last resort if assaulted first. Hope that clears up the confusion.

I was hardly confused Brit, I read the OP's post and then read your response that a good smacking was probably needed.

Good smacking is prob what would be needed. I think anything less, prob the ignorant c*nt wouldnt get through his thick skull on what proper behaviour is

I don't recall you suggesting having a word with the guy first, in fact I believe I got the impression that anything less wouldn't have taught the ignorant c*nt what proper behavior is. :o

I'd surely have a chat with him and explain the proper way to behave and def so to embarrass him.

Without of course knowing the situation at all, and assuming he is behaving badly without reason towards the woman. You don't know if the woman just called him a 'German c*nt' and he was in fact witholding his temper. You don't know if his wife and just gave birth to a stillborn baby an hour beforehand and in was in a highly stressful state. You don't know if he was just handed a hospital bill way over what he should have been paying and had just been scammed.

You instead assess the situation based on two quoted words from the German and already decide on his punishment.

Now if a smacking is in order - he's have to try and attempt to assault me first. This lad is far from stupid. cool.gif

When a thread is opened titled "what would you do when a farang attacks you?" then we'll give you a call and you can beat your chest then about how hard you are and how stupid another man would be to mess with you.

Until then, cool your jets, jai yen yen, and attempt to understand the problem before you try to solve it.

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BKK - no worries all is good. :D Go grab a few pints and chill out a bit. I'll be doing such in a few hrs time. :D

I'm chilled Brit, all is good. I just find your constant stream of violent remarks and about how hard you are to get a bit tiresome after a while. :D

Just the other year you was talking about breaking a member's hands when you heard he'd been abusing the ladies here at a meet up, a completely false accusation as it turned out.

But kind of interesting that you was scared silent when a member actually did verbally abuse and allegedly headbutt another female poster on this board at another meet up. I dont recall you sending out any threats of punishment then. :o

Of course that guy is a big dude, and not so easily beaten up by the likes of yourself. Certainly not as easy to beat up as a tourist written about on an internet thread. How many punches did you do this guy in with? Was it one punch knockout? And whos the 'we' described as helping to dish out more punches if he fought back, the rest of the mob?

It's lucky for yourself and others that you never manage to get off the barstool or from behind the computer screen to put your violent words into action.

Stop playing the hard man Brit, it doesn't suit so well at your age. :D

Edited by bkkmadness
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I would say that unless you are actually in the situation as it happens it is very difficult to know how you would react.

(PS. Hitting somebody or something does not solve the problem)

If you come home and your wife is in bed with another man do you?

A)Congratulate him.

:o Wake him up with a smack round the head .

C) Walk out and give her the house.

What would you do if 2 Thai men were arguing?

I think most of us would walk away.

2 Thai women arguing?

A person shouting at a child or old person?

A person kicking a dog ( it may have just killed his cat).

It all depends on the situation ,I have stood and screamed at a Airport Ticket officer (German)

at his stupidity because I thought I was right..............the people behind me probably thought I was

a stupid Englishman.....................

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BKK - no worries all is good. :D Go grab a few pints and chill out a bit. I'll be doing such in a few hrs time. :D

I'm chilled Brit, all is good. I just find your constant stream of violent remarks and about how hard you are to get a bit tiresome after a while.

Funny about points of view isn't it.

I really enjoy brit's posts because he goes out of his way NOT to be a "hard" guy.

He's always trying to make peace between other members and get everyone to look at the other people's point of view. He actually goes out of his way to make other posters feel better.

Takes all kinds, I guess. :o

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