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Never understand people here?


Kenny202

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"mostly what I see is a lot of fakeness, opportunism, selfishness, drunkenness, laziness, child / animal abuse and neglect, showing off, jealousy, gossip and an attitude of entitlement."

..and you rarely encounter that behavior in your home country?

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"mostly what I see is a lot of fakeness, opportunism, selfishness, drunkenness, laziness, child / animal abuse and neglect, showing off, jealousy, gossip and an attitude of entitlement."

..and you rarely encounter that behavior in your home country?

Not to this level

....no

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Long time ago I went to visit my GF's family . I invited the whole family to dinner and at the end the half village was "invited" not a big deal money-wise but when I asked for the bill, I nostarted ordering take-away!ticed many of the "guests" This blew my fuse, I paid but left the same evening.

Yes, that is taking the manners bit just too far, in fact, it is taking the PI$$. I would have asked for and just paid the first bill, and left them to pay for the takeaway.

The "Takeaways" were properly only the rests in a plastic bag.....coffee1.gif

Rests? You mean the leftovers to take home for the dogs? If that was the case, the waiters or whoever, would have handed out empty bags.

I have seen my wife doing this after a wedding meal. I can only assume "many of the guests", as the poster says, all had dogs.

The poster said "many of the guests started ordering takeaways", so I would think that is what he had actually seen.

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A lot of Thais don't understand you as well and shake their head at common farang behavior such as walking in public without a shirt on, walking down the street barefoot, throwing your money on the counter, quick to argue and be confrontational, etc, etc.

I once stayed in a guest house where the Canadian next door would often bang his doormat against the balcony letting the debris fall on the other balconies below. What I saw as incredibly rude and inconsiderate, he saw as perfectly acceptable.

For many Thais, farang often come across as rude, arrogant and confrontational when they don't get their way. You don't sound like that type, but your post hints to a level of entitlement expectation of reciprocity that is not overtly displayed in many Asian cultures.

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There is manners and there is common sense, Thais very often jump queues, that is bad manners to us, but not to them, but it is also common sense to see that is wrong, I do not like to be seen as a Thai basher,

but one of the few downsides of the Thais IMO, is their very poor lack of common sense, but at the same time, not them all.

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A lot of Thais don't understand you as well and shake their head at common farang behavior such as walking in public without a shirt on, walking down the street barefoot, throwing your money on the counter, quick to argue and be confrontational, etc, etc.

I once stayed in a guest house where the Canadian next door would often bang his doormat against the balcony letting the debris fall on the other balconies below. What I saw as incredibly rude and inconsiderate, he saw as perfectly acceptable.

For many Thais, farang often come across as rude, arrogant and confrontational when they don't get their way. You don't sound like that type, but your post hints to a level of entitlement expectation of reciprocity that is not overtly displayed in many Asian cultures.

My experience of Thailand is that favours are met with gratitude...

I have found more overlapping similarity in our cultures than differences. The strongest similarity I have observed is that its quite obvious when someone is being considerate and polite, its quite obvious when they are not - this is true of any culture I have experienced.

If people are being rude, ungrateful, self-centred or careless its not because of their culture, its because they are rude, ungrateful, self-centred and careless.... Its just that simple.

My Brother in Law takes us to the Airport - We (Wife and I) say thanks and pick up a little present.

My Parents in Law take us to dinner, we (Wife and I) say thanks, I take them to dinner next time.

Generosity, care and consideration don't need to be reciprocated, just recognised, particularly by people with whom you share mutual respect.

Culture is often misused to explain poor manners of others... when in reality, its just poor manners.

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A lot of Thais don't understand you as well and shake their head at common farang behavior such as walking in public without a shirt on, walking down the street barefoot, throwing your money on the counter, quick to argue and be confrontational, etc, etc.

I once stayed in a guest house where the Canadian next door would often bang his doormat against the balcony letting the debris fall on the other balconies below. What I saw as incredibly rude and inconsiderate, he saw as perfectly acceptable.

For many Thais, farang often come across as rude, arrogant and confrontational when they don't get their way. You don't sound like that type, but your post hints to a level of entitlement expectation of reciprocity that is not overtly displayed in many Asian cultures.

My experience of Thailand is that favours are met with gratitude...

I have found more overlapping similarity in our cultures than differences. The strongest similarity I have observed is that its quite obvious when someone is being considerate and polite, its quite obvious when they are not - this is true of any culture I have experienced.

If people are being rude, ungrateful, self-centred or careless its not because of their culture, its because they are rude, ungrateful, self-centred and careless.... Its just that simple.

My Brother in Law takes us to the Airport - We (Wife and I) say thanks and pick up a little present.

My Parents in Law take us to dinner, we (Wife and I) say thanks, I take them to dinner next time.

Generosity, care and consideration don't need to be reciprocated, just recognised, particularly by people with whom you share mutual respect.

Culture is often misused to explain poor manners of others... when in reality, its just poor manners.

People are basically the same all over the world. That said, there are cultural norms and expectations that while common in one country are considered offensive in another. Doesn't make one better than the other, but ignoring this will lead to misunderstandings, frustration and isolation.

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It's not just some people in Thailand.I believe it's that way all over the world.I really believe it's how the individual person was

Raised.There are so many 1 way people in the world it's unbelievable.I've got to the point I never think A person will do me A

Favor just because I do them one.But the way I was raised I won't stop helping people.

Two words come to mind, GREED and ME.

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Used to rile me that I would take the extended family on say a long weekend holiday and pay for lots of stuff, then on arrival home they would all pile out of the car without a word of thanks. Then I realised that Isaan people tend to do stuff within families without any gratitudes being shown or expected. Politeness is reserved for strangers and remoter living friends&family in Thailand - no hellos, goodbyes and thank yous within the wide circle of families and friends who live cheek by jowl.

I still carry my western culture with me and I thank the ladies of the family when they have made food for me (at least half the evening meals are taken at baan yai) which sometimes I have indirectly paid for sometimes not, or when neighbours bring the beer. It must be sinking in - I noticed that some thanked me when we got back from a long weekend yesterday!

As one who is steeped in Western tradition, I found it very hard to accept the Thai way of not greeting each other, or parting ways after a visit or party, without the Western-style hug or kiss on the cheek. And I can still remember my embarrassment and the awkwardness of the moment when I extended my hand for a shake.

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This is pure gold. The ranting and umbrage of the Isaan Pensioners Millionaires that the local peasants aren't throwing themselves at their feet in gratitude for a few thousand baht is hilarious/sickening to behold though I suspect that 'anger is more a realisation that 'Tee Rak' is maybe not really into the wrinkled flabby, saggy old man body look after all....

What a bunch of losers. Maybe you could form a "I hate Thai Culture' meeting at your local mom and pop store every Wednesday?

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Dad lets me drive the black Mercedes Benz, Mum the white Honda CRV. My wife, family, friends, neighbors, and community in BKK are kind, considerate, compassionate, sharing, honest, and and an absolute pleasure to live with.

I guess when you live and associate with low class, you get just that. Education, strong parenting, and a degree of affluence here in the city is more akin to my upbringing and beliefs, and couldn't be further than that of an Issan peasant.

It's a great asset to help others; but judging by most of the posts, the majority are partnered with the very low class. They are nothing like us. You can't have expectations when they know no better.

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Dad lets me drive the black Mercedes Benz, Mum the white Honda CRV. My wife, family, friends, neighbors, and community in BKK are kind, considerate, compassionate, sharing, honest, and and an absolute pleasure to live with.

I guess when you live and associate with low class, you get just that. Education, strong parenting, and a degree of affluence here in the city is more akin to my upbringing and beliefs, and couldn't be further than that of an Issan peasant.

It's a great asset to help others; but judging by most of the posts, the majority are partnered with the very low class. They are nothing like us. You can't have expectations when they know no better.

That's a condescending post.

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Dad lets me drive the black Mercedes Benz, Mum the white Honda CRV. My wife, family, friends, neighbors, and community in BKK are kind, considerate, compassionate, sharing, honest, and and an absolute pleasure to live with.

I guess when you live and associate with low class, you get just that. Education, strong parenting, and a degree of affluence here in the city is more akin to my upbringing and beliefs, and couldn't be further than that of an Issan peasant.

It's a great asset to help others; but judging by most of the posts, the majority are partnered with the very low class. They are nothing like us. You can't have expectations when they know no better.

That's a condescending post.

Nevertheless, the explanation offered is perhaps not too far detached from the reason why some are experiencing such unexpected behaviour.

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It maybe condescending but it is also true. The housing estate I live in is probably the most expensive in our area. Most of my neighbours are Thai, well educated and well mannered. Neighbours are both doctors. All our neighbours say hello when we pass, exchange gifts at New Year and if we give their kids a small gift after we return from overseas are always grateful. Similarly if they have been away they will usually

knock on the door with some small gift from where they went.

As per the last post if you decide to set up home with what most middle class Thais consider to be lower class people, how can you expect them to respond with what are considered good manners in the west when they have no experience of this type of life.

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It just sounds like both ladies have limited opportunities to try and make a little money. If they started thinking too much about trying to be such generous gals, they'd have a hard time selling anyone anything. They may well "owe" just about everyone in the village for some favor or another. Had a laugh imagining the chicken scenario. Your wife also probably really wanted a friend to cook and sit and have chicken with as well.

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Dad lets me drive the black Mercedes Benz, Mum the white Honda CRV. My wife, family, friends, neighbors, and community in BKK are kind, considerate, compassionate, sharing, honest, and and an absolute pleasure to live with.

I guess when you live and associate with low class, you get just that. Education, strong parenting, and a degree of affluence here in the city is more akin to my upbringing and beliefs, and couldn't be further than that of an Issan peasant.

It's a great asset to help others; but judging by most of the posts, the majority are partnered with the very low class. They are nothing like us. You can't have expectations when they know no better.

That's a condescending post.

Nevertheless, the explanation offered is perhaps not too far detached from the reason why some are experiencing such unexpected behaviour.

Really? I never thought having a built-in patronising and superiority attitude was a rationale for such 'unexpected' behaviour.

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It maybe condescending but it is also true. The housing estate I live in is probably the most expensive in our area. Most of my neighbours are Thai, well educated and well mannered. Neighbours are both doctors. All our neighbours say hello when we pass, exchange gifts at New Year and if we give their kids a small gift after we return from overseas are always grateful. Similarly if they have been away they will usually

knock on the door with some small gift from where they went.

As per the last post if you decide to set up home with what most middle class Thais consider to be lower class people, how can you expect them to respond with what are considered good manners in the west when they have no experience of this type of life.

Being rich and having the opportunity of a higher education doesn't make for a better person. It's dangerous to paint a picture that is skewed, a generalisation, and untrue. I worked for an aid agency for 10 years, and I saw more destitute people with zero life benefits who were the very epitome of kind and generous persons, than any number of well-off people.

Ask the Red Bull kid. And don't get me posting about the Koh Tao 'above the law' elite.

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Bcgardened,

Sorry, but i find your post repulsive, & yes I took the bait hook,line & sinker..

Food for Thought,,,,, I am very luckly where I was born & how my parents cared for me !!!

I could have been born in the middle of Africa or even worse as I had

no say over it

Stop Crowing toooooooo loud, the biggest rooster gets eaten first

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Bcgardened,

Sorry, but i find your post repulsive, & yes I took the bait hook,line & sinker..

Food for Thought,,,,, I am very luckly where I was born & how my parents cared for me !!!

I could have been born in the middle of Africa or even worse as I had

no say over it

Stop Crowing toooooooo loud, the biggest rooster gets eaten first

Don't let it bother you.

There's always a few members whose pension stretches to putting them in a level of society they could never have dreamed of at home which leads them to think they're part of the elite or the Lord Mayor of Bangkok.....

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It maybe condescending but it is also true. The housing estate I live in is probably the most expensive in our area. Most of my neighbours are Thai, well educated and well mannered. Neighbours are both doctors. All our neighbours say hello when we pass, exchange gifts at New Year and if we give their kids a small gift after we return from overseas are always grateful. Similarly if they have been away they will usually

knock on the door with some small gift from where they went.

As per the last post if you decide to set up home with what most middle class Thais consider to be lower class people, how can you expect them to respond with what are considered good manners in the west when they have no experience of this type of life.

This I very true. I have lived with educated city people and country people and the contrast is chalk and cheese. Not condescending or Thai bashing but reallity
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It maybe condescending but it is also true. The housing estate I live in is probably the most expensive in our area. Most of my neighbours are Thai, well educated and well mannered. Neighbours are both doctors. All our neighbours say hello when we pass, exchange gifts at New Year and if we give their kids a small gift after we return from overseas are always grateful. Similarly if they have been away they will usually

knock on the door with some small gift from where they went.

As per the last post if you decide to set up home with what most middle class Thais consider to be lower class people, how can you expect them to respond with what are considered good manners in the west when they have no experience of this type of life.

This I very true. I have lived with educated city people and country people and the contrast is chalk and cheese. Not condescending or Thai bashing but reallity
So have I and the country folks were far better. I now live CM and my wealthy neighbour gave me a packet of home grown cashew nuts as a gift. The rider was if I liked them I could order more from his family . In the country I could pick them from the trees no charge.
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Bcgardened,

Sorry, but i find your post repulsive, & yes I took the bait hook,line & sinker..

Food for Thought,,,,, I am very luckly where I was born & how my parents cared for me !!!

I could have been born in the middle of Africa or even worse as I had

no say over it

Stop Crowing toooooooo loud, the biggest rooster gets eaten first

Don't let it bother you. There's always a few members whose pension stretches to putting them in a level of society they could never have dreamed of at home which leads them to think they're part of the elite.....

There is also a few members that aren't on a pension and are working expats with an income that was better than home. I see no reason to denigrate someone because their income allows them to live a good lifestyle.

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Bcgardened,

Sorry, but i find your post repulsive, & yes I took the bait hook,line & sinker..

Food for Thought,,,,, I am very luckly where I was born & how my parents cared for me !!!

I could have been born in the middle of Africa or even worse as I had

no say over it

Stop Crowing toooooooo loud, the biggest rooster gets eaten first

Don't let it bother you. There's always a few members whose pension stretches to putting them in a level of society they could never have dreamed of at home which leads them to think they're part of the elite.....

There is also a few members that aren't on a pension and are working expats with an income that was better than home. I see no reason to denigrate someone because their income allows them to live a good lifestyle.

Maybe, but those self deluded snobs that suddenly think they're some kind of HiSo and get a chufty head because they can afford to live well in a sterile estate are worthy of a bit of denigration.....I was once put in Nitchida Thani and that place was full of them....

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1980's - Thais very gracious, heart warming and giving.

2015 - The Thais only think about themselves and what anybody can do for them.

That's why I sold everything and moved out of Thailand. Don't miss it at all.

It has changed enormously, but so will the place you went to.

I miss the 1980- 1998 Thailand, cannot even recognise it today but everything changes..actually something's get better..football on cable live instead of waiting for 2 days to get the results from the bangkokpost.

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It maybe condescending but it is also true. The housing estate I live in is probably the most expensive in our area. Most of my neighbours are Thai, well educated and well mannered. Neighbours are both doctors. All our neighbours say hello when we pass, exchange gifts at New Year and if we give their kids a small gift after we return from overseas are always grateful. Similarly if they have been away they will usually

knock on the door with some small gift from where they went.

As per the last post if you decide to set up home with what most middle class Thais consider to be lower class people, how can you expect them to respond with what are considered good manners in the west when they have no experience of this type of life.

Being rich and having the opportunity of a higher education doesn't make for a better person. It's dangerous to paint a picture that is skewed, a generalisation, and untrue. I worked for an aid agency for 10 years, and I saw more destitute people with zero life benefits who were the very epitome of kind and generous persons, than any number of well-off people.

Ask the Red Bull kid. And don't get me posting about the Koh Tao 'above the law' elite.

It helps..in terms of communal living in which a foreigner resides.

Poverty begets many issues..regardless of the decency, generosity of some.

It's a shame that they do not have opportunity to have a better education..

Red bull, Koh Tao says more about Thai society as it does about being educated.

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Bcgardened,

Sorry, but i find your post repulsive, & yes I took the bait hook,line & sinker..

Food for Thought,,,,, I am very luckly where I was born & how my parents cared for me !!!

I could have been born in the middle of Africa or even worse as I had

no say over it

Stop Crowing toooooooo loud, the biggest rooster gets eaten first

Don't let it bother you. There's always a few members whose pension stretches to putting them in a level of society they could never have dreamed of at home which leads them to think they're part of the elite.....

There is also a few members that aren't on a pension and are working expats with an income that was better than home. I see no reason to denigrate someone because their income allows them to live a good lifestyle.

Maybe, but those self deluded snobs that suddenly think they're some kind of HiSo and get a chufty head because they can afford to live well in a sterile estate are worthy of a bit of denigration.....I was once put in Nitchida Thani and that place was full of them....

There is no shame in ambition and working hard in order to improve your lot in life.

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