Docno Posted August 31, 2015 Share Posted August 31, 2015 My gf of 5 years goes through the same thing in her village, and again it's some of her friends who give her the most grief (especially the relatively more hiso ones). They're the ones who will constantly ask her why I haven't bought her a car yet or why I don't fly her to Bangkok to meet rather than letting her take the bus. It's caused a real tension in her friendship with a couple of them. She also owns a small beauty shop and previously had several photos of us in the 'work' area that customers could see. On a trip there a few months back, I noticed that all the photos of us had been moved to her bedroom walls at the back of her shop. I asked her about it, and she said that she had become tired of all her customers asking about her 'farang bf' and giving her advice about how to extract money from me. She found these sorts of conversations very stressful and hurtful, and they were happening on a daily basis. Clearly, for many village people, having a foreign partner is like coming across the proverbial pot of gold, and they are intent on imposing this outlook on others. p.s. I'm not completely kao niao. I did buy my gf a new bike because her 10 year old one was literally falling apart. [Turned out it was cheaper than my latest camera purchase, but I will not be telling her that ] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
recycler Posted August 31, 2015 Share Posted August 31, 2015 What you feel is exactly the reason why we don't live in the village. Why live somewhere where you have nothing in common with anybody around, it's creating problems for you and your wife. You are putting their social structures out of balance. My wife's village is exactly the same, they are jealous and can't accept that those people that where the poorest in the village now have overtaken them in prosperity even only by a little bit. We go there every few months and that's enough for both of us. We live in an area where there are more people living that we have something in common with. In our case, other mixed foreign-Thai couples with mostly working husbands. My wife has lots of friends, the kids have lots of friends and even I get to meet a lot of other guys that I have a lot in common with. Contacts with Thais are scarce as they don't easily mingle with foreigners, the Thais that we meet all work with foreigners and speak English, even though I speak more than average Thai, they won't easily have a conversation with you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mxyzptlk Posted August 31, 2015 Share Posted August 31, 2015 I don't live right out in the sticks...... about 1 Km from highway 24...only lived here in Isaan full time for nearly 6 years and I love it here. I couldn't live in Korat or Buriram (closest cities to me)....I like life in the slow lane with my dogs & chickens. I get up when I wake up, sleep when I'm tired and eat when I'm hungry...bit of a change to my previous life when I was a slave to the clock & mobile phone In-laws live next door to us and they are good as gold. Only 3 other houses in our street Yes, there is petty jealousies, gossip, showing off etc but that doesn't bother me or Mrs M Guess I'm just lucky Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thehelmsman Posted August 31, 2015 Share Posted August 31, 2015 My gf of 5 years goes through the same thing in her village, and again it's some of her friends who give her the most grief (especially the relatively more hiso ones). They're the ones who will constantly ask her why I haven't bought her a car yet or why I don't fly her to Bangkok to meet rather than letting her take the bus. It's caused a real tension in her friendship with a couple of them. She also owns a small beauty shop and previously had several photos of us in the 'work' area that customers could see. On a trip there a few months back, I noticed that all the photos of us had been moved to her bedroom walls at the back of her shop. I asked her about it, and she said that she had become tired of all her customers asking about her 'farang bf' and giving her advice about how to extract money from me. She found these sorts of conversations very stressful and hurtful, and they were happening on a daily basis. Clearly, for many village people, having a foreign partner is like coming across the proverbial pot of gold, and they are intent on imposing this outlook on others. p.s. I'm not completely kao niao. I did buy my gf a new bike because her 10 year old one was literally falling apart. [Turned out it was cheaper than my latest camera purchase, but I will not be telling her that ] Now I want to know why you have her taking bus rather than flying? You don't have to buy her a car, you can buy one for yourself that she can drive and everyone's happy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DavidB4 Posted August 31, 2015 Share Posted August 31, 2015 In my situation all the dogs are pets. The flip-side is that the people from whom I rent my house and share the same front gate appreciate that they can take their kids out to school in the morning and I have already cleaned up any mess. The exception is usually only when I leave real early and the dogs have made their deposit after I leave and then they clean it up themselves so their kids won't step in the mess. Curious; what would happen if after cleaning up their dogs mess you then dumped it in front of their gate/door? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
georgemandm Posted August 31, 2015 Share Posted August 31, 2015 I think my wife is starting to feel some pressure living here. Been a lot of pressures on her moving back here with a farang husband...strangely I've adapted easilly. I think she thought she would move back here and receive instant status etc but the tall poppy syndrome is alive and well in Isaan. Petty jealousies, gossip, showing off par for the course. My wife came to live in Australia for a year and wasn't impressed with the big house etc. She couldn't get the same food there as in Isaan haha. I wud rather have a girl like that than a woman who dives into the designer lifestyle. She grew up dirt poor, and I mean poorer than most poor people here. She really hasn't changed either, the people around her have though. For eg people can't understand why she has money yet she dresses like a farm girl and gossip. If she was getting around in designer gear and make up she'd be equally ostrasised. She's had 3 friends put photos of me in their Facebook and lead others to believe i am their guy. Even close friends which has hurt her deeply. Had a girl here yesterday joke to her if my wife doesn't help her find a farang husband she'll come and steal me. A joke but not a joke to an Isaan girl. Half the people seem to gossip because I roll my own cigarettes and we chose to renovate her basic 2 bedroom home rather than build a palace. We have a lovely comfortable home but who in their right mind would spend millions of baht on a home on non chanote village land in someone elses name. I'm kie neow and kie nok. Seems like many would like to see her fall down and very hard for her to win it would seem. Weve gone out of our way to be friendly and respectful, live low key and help where we can. I wont have a bar of showing off. Its easy for me to genuinely respect most here because I cudnt work on a farm bent over for 12 hours in 40 degree heat. We have a lot of genuine friends here too but the few negative types dominate my wifes thoughts. The gossip really doesn't worry me as in most cases whilst they're wrong I can understand the childlike reasoning, lack of education and the boredom which breeds gossip. There are some hiso families in the village with big homes and big gates and they simply shut the lower people out of their lives. Strangely people here seem to respect that as that is how they expect someone with money to act and there comfortable. Everything as it should be. We don't encourage cadgers wanting a handout or drunks but the local kids know they are always welcome and get a feed here. Even that's been a bone of contention? Why you take care of kid but not give older people anything? I'm afforded VIP Status everywhere I go simply because I am a farang. I actually like the language barrier, I don't have to listen to any negativity. Im not whining or complaining. Im very happy living here but i do feel for my wife. Anyone else have similar pressures moving to Isaan? Hi I have live in a village in issan off and on for 6 years and to me it is the same as you all the bullshit with the village people and I not give a shit I not care if my thai listens to they shit I tell her not to listen and if she dose up to her I am a lot lucky then most man in thailand I go home a lot to get away from the shit village life not know about you but to me village life is shit give me my home back in Australia any day I not get the shit I get in a thai villages . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
eliotness Posted August 31, 2015 Share Posted August 31, 2015 This topic is such a nice change, no politics no argument. I guess we can all relate to what everyone says. I live also 2 km outside the village, in-laws next door (2) and I have many of the concerns of the posters, but I too love my life in rural Thailand. Sure there are problems but what the heck !!! a much better life than in my town & country of birth. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
1FinickyOne Posted August 31, 2015 Share Posted August 31, 2015 Just live your life - don't bother with what people say - you seem fine with it but tell your wife to simply ignore people who say stupid things from petty jealousies… I live in a small village too and every once in a while someone will say/do something stupid. I pretty much just stick with family and my actions here have proved me out over a long period of time. And it never takes long before the idiots prove themselves out too… but near all my encounters here are pleasant. I assume it is for you too and your wife has family that will support her. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stereolab Posted August 31, 2015 Share Posted August 31, 2015 If you read my earlier posts I said that if you do the right thing , I believe time and patience will win out. I referred to the particular and present issue of the purchase of the bike as a no win. Many things I have done here whilst first laughed at have taken off. When I started growing grass was a great laugh around town. Like why would u grow something u can't eat or sell and only have to cut later? It doesnt worry me. I only smile. Many are now doing the same thing. The latest is why am I "kie neow" and not pay someone to cut the grass. Obviously i dont really have money. Everyone comes to look at our house to get ideas. I've built in robes and a pantry...many other things. They just haven't ever seen anything like that before. An electric water pump. 5000 baht which many here can afford and install easilly. Just never thought of it. I love that aspect of life here It is a no win situation for a Farang living in Isaan village, so I just get on with my life, luckily I cannot understand most of what is being said, it is, as you commented, harder on the wife. Whatever you do they will comment on, they have time on their hands. They wil never understand us, and vice-versa. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thehelmsman Posted August 31, 2015 Share Posted August 31, 2015 I think my wife is starting to feel some pressure living here. Been a lot of pressures on her moving back here with a farang husband...strangely I've adapted easilly. I think she thought she would move back here and receive instant status etc but the tall poppy syndrome is alive and well in Isaan. Petty jealousies, gossip, showing off par for the course. My wife came to live in Australia for a year and wasn't impressed with the big house etc. She couldn't get the same food there as in Isaan haha. I wud rather have a girl like that than a woman who dives into the designer lifestyle. She grew up dirt poor, and I mean poorer than most poor people here. She really hasn't changed either, the people around her have though. For eg people can't understand why she has money yet she dresses like a farm girl and gossip. If she was getting around in designer gear and make up she'd be equally ostrasised. She's had 3 friends put photos of me in their Facebook and lead others to believe i am their guy. Even close friends which has hurt her deeply. Had a girl here yesterday joke to her if my wife doesn't help her find a farang husband she'll come and steal me. A joke but not a joke to an Isaan girl. Half the people seem to gossip because I roll my own cigarettes and we chose to renovate her basic 2 bedroom home rather than build a palace. We have a lovely comfortable home but who in their right mind would spend millions of baht on a home on non chanote village land in someone elses name. I'm kie neow and kie nok. Seems like many would like to see her fall down and very hard for her to win it would seem. Weve gone out of our way to be friendly and respectful, live low key and help where we can. I wont have a bar of showing off. Its easy for me to genuinely respect most here because I cudnt work on a farm bent over for 12 hours in 40 degree heat. We have a lot of genuine friends here too but the few negative types dominate my wifes thoughts. The gossip really doesn't worry me as in most cases whilst they're wrong I can understand the childlike reasoning, lack of education and the boredom which breeds gossip. There are some hiso families in the village with big homes and big gates and they simply shut the lower people out of their lives. Strangely people here seem to respect that as that is how they expect someone with money to act and there comfortable. Everything as it should be. We don't encourage cadgers wanting a handout or drunks but the local kids know they are always welcome and get a feed here. Even that's been a bone of contention? Why you take care of kid but not give older people anything? I'm afforded VIP Status everywhere I go simply because I am a farang. I actually like the language barrier, I don't have to listen to any negativity. Im not whining or complaining. Im very happy living here but i do feel for my wife. Anyone else have similar pressures moving to Isaan? Hi I have live in a village in issan off and on for 6 years and to me it is the same as you all the bullshit with the village people and I not give a shit I not care if my thai listens to they shit I tell her not to listen and if she dose up to her I am a lot lucky then most man in thailand I go home a lot to get away from the shit village life not know about you but to me village life is shit give me my home back in Australia any day I not get the shit I get in a thai villages . Have another small shot of lao kao and take it easy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
janpharma Posted August 31, 2015 Share Posted August 31, 2015 No more Isaan for me...Met the girl (somewhat 8 yrs ago) from a nice farmer's family...9 brothers and sisters, all working. Usual story: husband had left her and 2 children...She had taken "shark"- and other loans and bought an at that time expensive motorbike for the son, also on credit. To cut a long story short, I took care of everyting, paid back the loans, took care of her and the children, paid for everything...school care, dental care, skin care dr, eye care...etc... Meanwhile she only wanted to "show off"...had at least 10 "Mc Jeans" in the wardrobe, most expensive cloths and more. Bought a peace of land in her village and built a beautiful house. When the house was finished I decided to sell the 2 door pick-up and wanted to buy a small car so that she also could easy learn to drive. Oh no!...She became really angry...NO small car...finally I was that stupid to listen to her and the most expensive SUV appeared...She wouldn't drive it. She only wanted to show-off... I felt like I only served as the care-taker and the driver...And I got bored of it all. Then I went to the coastal side and looked around to find a nice place where we could spend some time, not too far from the sea. I also discovered that I could follow Thai lessons over there, which opportunity didn't excist in the Isaan area where we lived. And I found an old empty small house where nobody had lived in (except for termites) during 17 years...one can immagine how it looked like... But I decided to fix it up...of course that would take some time. During the works she remained in Isaan and came to visit me twice. I was still supporting her and also paid for the first year of the university for the daughter. She told me that she also found a little job and made sandwiches. Everything sounded ok so far... At a certain day, I receive a phone call from a farang living next to her village. I know him for several years. His wife left him about a year ago. He told me that my wife didn't work at all but stayed with him for 6 months already...all the time she lied about that. She played a double game and he feared that se would leave him. She also takes a monthly allowance from him for her "services". Now she wants an impossible amount of money... The case now goes to Court, in Thailand as well as in my home country... Bey bey, Isaan...I've had it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sammygood Posted August 31, 2015 Share Posted August 31, 2015 kie nok or not ... ATM written on your forehead ... they like to spend money like there is no tomorrow, is there ? you probably a cheap bastard farang in their eyes, if you give them something or nothing anyway Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stereolab Posted August 31, 2015 Share Posted August 31, 2015 Sorry guys, I can't really contribute much to the theme "Dog-Feces". But, by returning to the topic, I can say this: A Farang with Thai-Wife, settling in "her" village, only wanting to lead a peaceful and non bombastic life (no Mansion, no show-off car(s) ), will soon be on the radar. Something like this: The Thai-Lady was overseas for 10 years (or has been working in Pattaya for 10 years), general comment: "After all this time, has she not been able to land "a bigger fish" than this Farang Kiniau?" As long as the "modest-lifestyle" was agreed upon beforehand between Farang/Thai-wife, the opinions of the villagers can be shrugged off. However, if the idea of wanting to live a live in moderation is not shared by the Thai-Wife equally, one does not have to be a clairvoyant, to know what's around the corner......... = "Pressures of living in an Isaan village." Indeed. Cheers. I always find it amazing how neighbours (or family) who have absolutely nothing, have achieved nothing and have no ambition to get of their ar5es to achieve anything, can comment on how little others have! That is a spot on comment, huge numbers will die in the village without ever experiencing life more than 5k from their village. I laugh when I hear, on a constant basis, Pai nai(spelling), as the answer 100% of the time is Pai Talat, going somewhere outside their village is an alien concept, as is world affairs which do not affect Thailand. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
silent Posted August 31, 2015 Share Posted August 31, 2015 We talking just Isaan villages here, or Thailand as a hole? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Docno Posted August 31, 2015 Share Posted August 31, 2015 My gf of 5 years goes through the same thing in her village, and again it's some of her friends who give her the most grief (especially the relatively more hiso ones). They're the ones who will constantly ask her why I haven't bought her a car yet or why I don't fly her to Bangkok to meet rather than letting her take the bus. It's caused a real tension in her friendship with a couple of them. She also owns a small beauty shop and previously had several photos of us in the 'work' area that customers could see. On a trip there a few months back, I noticed that all the photos of us had been moved to her bedroom walls at the back of her shop. I asked her about it, and she said that she had become tired of all her customers asking about her 'farang bf' and giving her advice about how to extract money from me. She found these sorts of conversations very stressful and hurtful, and they were happening on a daily basis. Clearly, for many village people, having a foreign partner is like coming across the proverbial pot of gold, and they are intent on imposing this outlook on others. p.s. I'm not completely kao niao. I did buy my gf a new bike because her 10 year old one was literally falling apart. [Turned out it was cheaper than my latest camera purchase, but I will not be telling her that ] Now I want to know why you have her taking bus rather than flying? You don't have to buy her a car, you can buy one for yourself that she can drive and everyone's happy. 1. I don't stay in Thailand most of the time (my work is in Singapore), 2. she doesn't have a driver's license (granted, that's not much of a hurdle in Thailand), 3. I'm 'kao niao and proud' Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mcfish Posted August 31, 2015 Share Posted August 31, 2015 No more Isaan for me...Met the girl (somewhat 8 yrs ago) from a nice farmer's family...9 brothers and sisters, all working. Usual story: husband had left her and 2 children...She had taken "shark"- and other loans and bought an at that time expensive motorbike for the son, also on credit. To cut a long story short, I took care of everyting, paid back the loans, took care of her and the children, paid for everything...school care, dental care, skin care dr, eye care...etc... Meanwhile she only wanted to "show off"...had at least 10 "Mc Jeans" in the wardrobe, most expensive cloths and more. Bought a peace of land in her village and built a beautiful house. When the house was finished I decided to sell the 2 door pick-up and wanted to buy a small car so that she also could easy learn to drive. Oh no!...She became really angry...NO small car...finally I was that stupid to listen to her and the most expensive SUV appeared...She wouldn't drive it. She only wanted to show-off... I felt like I only served as the care-taker and the driver...And I got bored of it all. Then I went to the coastal side and looked around to find a nice place where we could spend some time, not too far from the sea. I also discovered that I could follow Thai lessons over there, which opportunity didn't excist in the Isaan area where we lived. And I found an old empty small house where nobody had lived in (except for termites) during 17 years...one can immagine how it looked like... But I decided to fix it up...of course that would take some time. During the works she remained in Isaan and came to visit me twice. I was still supporting her and also paid for the first year of the university for the daughter. She told me that she also found a little job and made sandwiches. Everything sounded ok so far... At a certain day, I receive a phone call from a farang living next to her village. I know him for several years. His wife left him about a year ago. He told me that my wife didn't work at all but stayed with him for 6 months already...all the time she lied about that. She played a double game and he feared that se would leave him. She also takes a monthly allowance from him for her "services". Now she wants an impossible amount of money... The case now goes to Court, in Thailand as well as in my home country... Bey bey, Isaan...I've had it. What a cow! but honestly I dont think Isaan had anything to do with it Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kenny202 Posted August 31, 2015 Author Share Posted August 31, 2015 Hi I have live in a village in issan off and on for 6 years and to me it is the same as you all the bullshit with the village people and I not give a shit I not care if my thai listens to they shit I tell her not to listen and if she dose up to her I am a lot lucky then most man in thailand I go home a lot to get away from the shit village life not know about you but to me village life is shit give me my home back in Australia any day I not get the shit I get in a thai villages . No I do like it....no love it here. Strangely in one year haven't really missed Australia at all although it is a beautiful country. There are negatives for sure but I always try and look for the good. I have a beautiful national park and waterfall 2 km away and can go and sit alone anytime I want. We have a super comfortable home and a choice of the most wonderful farang and Thai food. I'm afforded friendliness and VIP Status everywhere I go. No traffic, no work politics...and really from many of the stories I've read our village is nowhere near as bad as others. Like I said, surprisingly to myself it's a lot easier for me to live here than my girl. Trying to teach her to be smarter than the average bear and rise above it all Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JLCrab Posted August 31, 2015 Share Posted August 31, 2015 In my situation all the dogs are pets. The flip-side is that the people from whom I rent my house and share the same front gate appreciate that they can take their kids out to school in the morning and I have already cleaned up any mess. The exception is usually only when I leave real early and the dogs have made their deposit after I leave and then they clean it up themselves so their kids won't step in the mess. Curious; what would happen if after cleaning up their dogs mess you then dumped it in front of their gate/door? Believe me I've thought of such things. But my agreement with the family back home is that I will do nothing deliberately that will cause anyone to have to travel to Thailand to bail me out figuratively if not literally. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kenny202 Posted August 31, 2015 Author Share Posted August 31, 2015 No more Isaan for me...Met the girl (somewhat 8 yrs ago) from a nice farmer's family...9 brothers and sisters, all working. Usual story: husband had left her and 2 children...She had taken "shark"- and other loans and bought an at that time expensive motorbike for the son, also on credit. To cut a long story short, I took care of everyting, paid back the loans, took care of her and the children, paid for everything...school care, dental care, skin care dr, eye care...etc... Meanwhile she only wanted to "show off"...had at least 10 "Mc Jeans" in the wardrobe, most expensive cloths and more. Bought a peace of land in her village and built a beautiful house. When the house was finished I decided to sell the 2 door pick-up and wanted to buy a small car so that she also could easy learn to drive. Oh no!...She became really angry...NO small car...finally I was that stupid to listen to her and the most expensive SUV appeared...She wouldn't drive it. She only wanted to show-off... I felt like I only served as the care-taker and the driver...And I got bored of it all. Then I went to the coastal side and looked around to find a nice place where we could spend some time, not too far from the sea. I also discovered that I could follow Thai lessons over there, which opportunity didn't excist in the Isaan area where we lived. And I found an old empty small house where nobody had lived in (except for termites) during 17 years...one can immagine how it looked like... But I decided to fix it up...of course that would take some time. During the works she remained in Isaan and came to visit me twice. I was still supporting her and also paid for the first year of the university for the daughter. She told me that she also found a little job and made sandwiches. Everything sounded ok so far... At a certain day, I receive a phone call from a farang living next to her village. I know him for several years. His wife left him about a year ago. He told me that my wife didn't work at all but stayed with him for 6 months already...all the time she lied about that. She played a double game and he feared that se would leave him. She also takes a monthly allowance from him for her "services". Now she wants an impossible amount of money... The case now goes to Court, in Thailand as well as in my home country... Bey bey, Isaan...I've had it. That's a sad story. Hope you come out of it ok. Wondering why it's going to court here and at home? Where u registered marriage? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fang37 Posted August 31, 2015 Share Posted August 31, 2015 The story should be made for Thai TV - a sure winner. Tears, lies, Farang ripped off, infidelity. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pinot Posted August 31, 2015 Share Posted August 31, 2015 I love living in Phuket. I send my TG home to Issan to visit the family a few times a year. When I go I'm always asked, "When will you be moving here?" "Two weeks before I die." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
callaway Posted August 31, 2015 Share Posted August 31, 2015 JLCRAB Get over the dog sh£t. This is not the JLCRAB forumn. Your dogs shit crap is hijacking the topic. Start your own thread about dog sh£t. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mercman24 Posted August 31, 2015 Share Posted August 31, 2015 get some tiger <deleted> from the zoo,leave it a few days, never have a problem with dogs again, on the other hand beware of tigers lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kenny202 Posted August 31, 2015 Author Share Posted August 31, 2015 Just live your life - don't bother with what people say - you seem fine with it but tell your wife to simply ignore people who say stupid things from petty jealousies… I live in a small village too and every once in a while someone will say/do something stupid. I pretty much just stick with family and my actions here have proved me out over a long period of time. And it never takes long before the idiots prove themselves out too… but near all my encounters here are pleasant. I assume it is for you too and your wife has family that will support her. I wish it was as easy as just tell her to ignore it. She's the most Un Thai person I ever met. Habitual worrier. One of the biggest disappointments for her was her uncle next door whom she respected and loved. Local teacher and always been her mentor. Her own mum and dad abandoned her wen young. (Please no free advice here about he's her real husband masquerading as uncle etc. The uncle has his own wife, kids...70yo) Long story but she sold some of her land 5 years ago. Woman came back demanding her money back because land has no Chanote (village land). She paid off BIB to come with her accusing my wife of fraud etc. (The woman is now in prison over a car theft ring). Anyway, the uncle and wife next door were witnesses at the signing of the sale and that she was aware the land carried no Chanote. It was all a sham basically because of bloody facebook. The woman saw my girl had a farang man and an easy opportunity for a shakedown. Sooooo. The uncle promised to come to the police station with my girl the next day.....tell their story. The girl had told so many bald faced lies which were easilly disproven and her uncle being a respected teacher....at the last minute the uncle and wife made an excuse for not coming and told her " not their problem". They also went and told others not to help us as well as it could possibly open up issues with land they'd sold. It deeply hurt my wife and shook the one foundation she had always had or thought she had in her life. In the end we lawyered up, got the BIB on our team, bought the land back for 25% of the sale price 5 years ago and sent her packing. From there on in she's been fairly negative about the people here and assumes everyone here is out to see her fall down Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stevemercer Posted August 31, 2015 Share Posted August 31, 2015 I live in a small town in Isaan. Maybe a town is better because it is larger and there is a mix of different people. I wanted a farmlet-style life so we have 5 Rai of land on which I am trying to grow trees to attract wildlife etc. We built a western style house. I guess the neighbours don't bother us because we are not on a main road. I have an air rifle and shoot at any dogs, cats or chickens on our property. Sometimes I have a lucky shot. I have had to dedicate a patch of our land to a pet cemetery. No one has come looking for any missing strays so far. I think my wife has been able to strike the right balance with her many friends. Most seem to still respect her and are jealous. But she can be volatile and won't hesitate to 'cut' off anyone she thinks disrespects her. The 'cutting' off doesn't seem to last long and then they are friends again. I do feel embarrassed doing ferang things when the locals are about, such as mowing the lawn, fixing a concrete drain or fishing in one of our dams. I often wonder whether I should pay someone a pittance to do the job rather than sweating it out in the sun for hours. But I enjoy such physical work and that is what I want to do. It is hard for Thais to understand that. Like others posters have commented, one remarkable aspect of Thai society is how tolerant people are of each other. There is not the slightest jealousy of a rich neighbour or someone who needlessly flaunts their wealth, even if they are a complete . They are inevitably treated with respect. My wife makes no bones that she would prefer to live back in Australia even though our lifestyle would be much poorer. She would be away from family crisis and free to do what she wants. No one in Australia cares how she dresses or what she does. Here, in Thailand, everyone knows and gossips. I don't speak good Thai so most of the gossip goes over my head. I can also avoid most of the advances of the local woman, and the inevitable problems, because of the communication problem (e.g. the 'I love you' brigade). The OPs wife does care about the opinion of others and is a worrier. Sometimes my wife has periods like that. But we are a team and have each other for the worst crisis. I think that is what a good marriage is all about. Hopefully, with your support, your wife will come to see that all that matters is you and her. At the end of the day, as long as you have each other, the rest can go to hell. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kenny202 Posted August 31, 2015 Author Share Posted August 31, 2015 JLCRAB Get over the dog sh£t. This is not the JLCRAB forumn. Your dogs shit crap is hijacking the topic. Start your own thread about dog sh£t.it's my thread and Mr Crab can sht all over it as far as I'm concerned. Crap away JL :-) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
streboris Posted August 31, 2015 Share Posted August 31, 2015 I've not lived in the village yet, only stayed at the in-laws, usually 3 weeks at a time. Everyone has always been very friendly and welcoming. But last time I was there I made a stupid mistake. I hadn't rented a car and wasn't happy riding the Honda wave... in town I saw some bigger bikes at the yamaha dealer... i had a moment of weakness and I bought a Yamaha R3. The missus said it wouldn't be a problem. But riding in to the village on that was like driving in in a Ferrari... Everyone came to investigate and first question was how much? 185,000 baht is a lot for such a flamboyantly selfish machine. People's attitudes changed towards me. Not only in the village, but everywhere. I will be going to live there soon and not sure how it will be. My wife doesn't normally want expensive clothes or to show off, but she seems proud to ride around on this as a show of status... I think it would be a good idea to sell it but not so easy How will it be?Easy..... Empty of fuel, bashed up a bit and in need of a service. BTW, I'm talking about your bike, not ..........(Don't matter) Best of luck to you. Hopefully not... but, if it is, it's been hot wired too... Sent from my SM-N9005 using Tapatalk Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NanLaew Posted August 31, 2015 Share Posted August 31, 2015 I suspect the dogs are trying to make a statement. Or the dogs are TV members who read Mr Crabs posts and maybe it is payback.What goes around comes around."Shit Happens"said Forrest. Thank you. So what about the family that I rent from with school-age kids? I guess it's just payback to them for renting to me as well. I take take heat however when I do mostly from the males of the 4 Thai couples who rent the 4 houses across the street with the dogs. I figure those guys look at my girlfriend who comes over and then look at their wives and then it's no wonder they have a mad-on for me. OMG!... JL's squeeze is a hottie and obviously not a splay-toed, snub-nosed, dark-skinned one either. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
villagefarang Posted August 31, 2015 Share Posted August 31, 2015 The thing which surprises me, is how so many of you could let yourselves be sucked into such depressing relationships and situations. Some guys boast about not being able to speak Thai, and I can’t help but think, there in lays the foundation of many of your problems. Communication is the foundation of society so if you can't communicate in any meaningful way you leave yourself open to being dehumanized, seen as an outsider and an easy target. Are people really that desperate for companionship that they actively seek out these toxic relationships? Instead of blaming the Thai people, why not ask what it is about you that you let yourself enter into these situations and make such regrettable choices? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thehelmsman Posted August 31, 2015 Share Posted August 31, 2015 JLCRAB Get over the dog sh£t. This is not the JLCRAB forumn. Your dogs shit crap is hijacking the topic. Start your own thread about dog sh£t. Crab - May no mind to the self appointed Big Dog, daily updates on the dog crap situation appreciated. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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