villagefarang Posted January 7, 2016 Share Posted January 7, 2016 Thailand is easy but people try their best to make it difficult. Just think about it, with tourist arrivals pushing 30 million this year Thailand is obviously easy to find and easy to get to. Visas are easy and so are things like accommodation, food and transportation. You can easily find a farang ghetto to live in, even limiting your interactions to those who speak your native tongue if you wish. For many foreigners their only form of interaction with Thai people comes in the form of exchanging bodily fluids and they seem to be happy with that. It doesn’t do much good to tell people they can’t live that way because many already are and sometimes have been for quite some time. Old, young, working, retired, single, married, divorced, gay, straight, rich and poor they all seem to find their way to Thailand. Yet there are those who insist on developing definitive lists describing all that is wrong with Thailand and what you absolutely must do to survive here. The notion that one size fits all is really ridiculous if you think about it but that doesn’t stop people from thinking that way. Thailand is a class structured society where your appearance in the form of clothing and grooming are important. Your manners, language and behavior, fairly or not are viewed through a Thai prism, but knowing that, it is really easy to maneuver within their system if you wish to. As foreigners we start off with a fairly elevated status in the eyes of most Thais and have to work pretty hard to shatter that view of us. Sadly many people deliberately thumb their nose at everything Thai people value, simply because it is not the same as back home. Of course you are free to do that but it does have consequences. You can easily live here without speaking Thai but if you consider how much of communication is nonverbal and how hard it is to accurately read the intent of those speaking the same language, how much more difficult is it to understand communication based on single words, not sentences, and with none of the subtle inflections and expressions that add so much meaning. In my opinion much of the paranoia and misunderstandings which one hears from foreigners is rooted in their inability to speak the language and understand what is really going on. People assume the worst or make bad decisions based on wrong assumptions. For some reason, when thinking about Thailand people seem to view it as a fixed target instead of a moving one. Like the young girl who endlessly fantasizes about her wedding day with little thought of what comes after, people who move to Thailand soon find that the wedding day does not last forever. What you think you want, what you actually want and what comes next and next and next, are often not what you expect. That part often isn’t easy if you come with fixed ideas about how things will be or should be. It doesn’t have to be difficult, however, if you have the attitude and temperament to deal with the unexpected. Thailand perhaps isn’t for everyone but no one can tell you if it is for you or not. You will have to find that out for yourself but try to remember it is a moving target which changes with the time you spend here and with your age. You may not agree with me but that is how I look at it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JLCrab Posted January 7, 2016 Share Posted January 7, 2016 I learned almost 30 years ago when first working in PR China that, when you don't understand what people are saying, they probably are not talking about you but more along the lines of: What'd you have for dinner last night? Meat loaf I hate meat loaf Yeah -- me too. However even speaking and understanding well enough Thai language, most people really could not care less about you and it's probably a waste of time to think otherwise. BTW from thhe screeplay for The Wizrd of Oz (1939): DOROTHY Oh, will you help me? Can you help me? GLINDA You don't need to be helped any longer. You've always had the power to go back to Kansas. DOROTHY I have? SCARECROW Then why didn't you tell her before? GLINDA Because she wouldn't have believed me. She had to learn it for herself. For me, I live in a house with a view however the view is most often the backside of this .. helps me get lots of things done as there is actually a big world to connect with out there outside of Thailand: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NoshowJones Posted January 7, 2016 Share Posted January 7, 2016 Living in Thailand is only what you make it. The positives easily outweigh the negatives. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shiroboi Posted January 7, 2016 Share Posted January 7, 2016 I've had nothing but a fantastic experience with very few negatives since coming here 3 years ago to live. I met my Thai Wife in the US and she's been pretty Americanized so I suppose I don't have the cultural issues like many expats do. Learning Thai shatters a whole lot of difficulties and issues with everyday life. It gets easier every day. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chilli42 Posted January 7, 2016 Share Posted January 7, 2016 Who is saying life in Thailand is difficult? I understand people spend many words on this site detailing what they don't like or what they want to see different. I am certain they have done the same in every country they have lived. Seems there is a segment of the population predisposed to being unhappy. Let's face it, everyone has their favorite hardship story. Maybe it's therapeutic to share these. Though clearly tedious to read, it does not mean they don't appreciate living in Thailand. Proof of this is that they continue to reside here. At the risk of stating the obvious, what people say and what people do are rarely the same. Try not to take things so seriously. Just don't click the link if it offends you ... this works for me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dotpoom Posted January 7, 2016 Share Posted January 7, 2016 I learned almost 30 years ago when first working in PR China that, when you don't understand what people are saying, they probably are not talking about you but more along the lines of: What'd you have for dinner last night? Meat loaf I hate meat loaf Yeah -- me too. However even speaking and understanding well enough Thai language, most people really could not care less about you and it's probably a waste of time to think otherwise. BTW from thhe screeplay for The Wizrd of Oz (1939): DOROTHY Oh, will you help me? Can you help me? GLINDA You don't need to be helped any longer. You've always had the power to go back to Kansas. DOROTHY I have? SCARECROW Then why didn't you tell her before? GLINDA Because she wouldn't have believed me. She had to learn it for herself. For me, I live in a house with a view however the view is most often the backside of this .. helps me get lots of things done as there is actually a big world to connect with out there outside of Thailand: when I told a mate one day that I felt some people were talking about me...his answer was ..."then I must have an exaggerated idea of my own importance because people are too busy thinking about themselves to give a toss about anyone ele"...a little harsh perhaps but largely true in the main. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CharlieH Posted January 7, 2016 Share Posted January 7, 2016 Living here isnt that hard if you adopt the right attitude. However, I personally find it a little unsettling at how things can change so rapidly here, and the future and constant political unrest does cause me some concern. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jingthing Posted January 7, 2016 Share Posted January 7, 2016 Arguably, it's too easy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
villagefarang Posted January 7, 2016 Author Share Posted January 7, 2016 Living here isnt that hard if you adopt the right attitude. However, I personally find it a little unsettling at how things can change so rapidly here, and the future and constant political unrest does cause me some concern. I think you are right about attitude. Since 1975 there have been so many twists and turns with one faction or the other predicting catastrophe, I have perhaps grown jaded. I have always been able to adjust in the past, so I tend not to worry about stuff which hasn’t happened yet. It is like when I am out riding my bike. I deal with what the trail conditions are on any given day and don’t spend a lot of time worrying about what might happen to the trail at some time in the future. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
villagefarang Posted January 7, 2016 Author Share Posted January 7, 2016 Arguably, it's too easy. I suppose that depends on what someone feels they need out of life and whether they think the ease of living here dulls the senses or kills ambition. I suppose that could be read another way, too. Too easy, so too many foreigners. Either way I don’t seem to be affected and continue to happily do my own thing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CharlieH Posted January 7, 2016 Share Posted January 7, 2016 Living here isnt that hard if you adopt the right attitude. However, I personally find it a little unsettling at how things can change so rapidly here, and the future and constant political unrest does cause me some concern. I think you are right about attitude. Since 1975 there have been so many twists and turns with one faction or the other predicting catastrophe, I have perhaps grown jaded. I have always been able to adjust in the past, so I tend not to worry about stuff which hasn’t happened yet. It is like when I am out riding my bike. I deal with what the trail conditions are on any given day and don’t spend a lot of time worrying about what might happen at some time in the future. As an overall "general" philosophy, yes, that may well work for some, if you are retired, financially secure etc. But for those that have different circumstances it would be stupid not to acknowledge whats potentially on the horizon and perhaps make contingency plans or be prepared. To use your bike analogy, carry and emergency repair kit ! as the road ahead you always used may well have just been wiped out or have some serious potholes in it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
villagefarang Posted January 7, 2016 Author Share Posted January 7, 2016 Living here isnt that hard if you adopt the right attitude. However, I personally find it a little unsettling at how things can change so rapidly here, and the future and constant political unrest does cause me some concern. I think you are right about attitude. Since 1975 there have been so many twists and turns with one faction or the other predicting catastrophe, I have perhaps grown jaded. I have always been able to adjust in the past, so I tend not to worry about stuff which hasn’t happened yet. It is like when I am out riding my bike. I deal with what the trail conditions are on any given day and don’t spend a lot of time worrying about what might happen at some time in the future. As an overall "general" philosophy, yes, that may well work for some, if you are retired, financially secure etc. But for those that have different circumstances it would be stupid not to acknowledge whats potentially on the horizon and perhaps make contingency plans or be prepared. To use your bike analogy, carry and emergency repair kit ! as the road ahead you always used may well have just been wiped out or have some serious potholes in it. I do get your point but I have never been great at making detailed contingency plans and have never needed to. I don’t carry a repair kit, either. I guess my preparation lies in my experience and confidence that I can deal with whatever comes up. I am never overly committed to a particular line and always leave room to adjust. It is up to each individual to know what works best for them. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jingthing Posted January 7, 2016 Share Posted January 7, 2016 Arguably, it's too easy. I suppose that depends on what someone feels they need out of life and whether they think the ease of living here dulls the senses or kills ambition. I suppose that could be read another way, too. Too easy, so too many foreigners. Either way I don’t seem to be affected and continue to happily do my own thing. It was meant to be ambiguous. Like Thailand. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
villagefarang Posted January 7, 2016 Author Share Posted January 7, 2016 Arguably, it's too easy. I suppose that depends on what someone feels they need out of life and whether they think the ease of living here dulls the senses or kills ambition. I suppose that could be read another way, too. Too easy, so too many foreigners. Either way I don’t seem to be affected and continue to happily do my own thing. It was meant to be ambiguous. Like Thailand. Even when crafting an ambiguous post one still has ideas as to how it could be read. I am just stating a couple of the options which popped into my head when reading it. That is how conversations get started. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jingthing Posted January 7, 2016 Share Posted January 7, 2016 Could be I've been in Thailand so long I don't know what I really meant. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bazza40 Posted January 7, 2016 Share Posted January 7, 2016 I suppose if you live in a house, in a field, in a valley with a view you become prone to introspection. Sorry, I'm too busy enjoying myself to do the deep and meaningful stuff. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
villagefarang Posted January 7, 2016 Author Share Posted January 7, 2016 Could be I've been in Thailand so long I don't know what I really meant. That is another option. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
1FinickyOne Posted January 7, 2016 Share Posted January 7, 2016 From what I see, people will do better if they get past at least a couple of layers of peeling back the onion of culture… it seems some people on this forum judge things by their past in another culture… if you ask a question in Thailand, you may not get a correct answer if you phrase it in a certain way to imply the answer - some Thai will not want to correct you and will agree even if you get it wrong... ie - "Where is the bathroom?" does not imply an answer - "Is the bathroom that way?" Implies an answer and even if wrong the person might be agreeable, non-confrontational and just say "yes" Information sometimes needs to be ciphered. Some people who do not know where the bathroom is, might tell you anyway, just guessing and trying to be helpful. I have seen so many documentaries and people on this forum too, who just have wrong information - things they were told by some well-meaning soul… that is not correct… After many years here, things become more apparent but if you do not speak Thai and have only been here a few years, learning the culture is a slow challenge - though people can live here comfortably w/o knowing the language or much at all about the culture - the Thai are mostly welcoming and understanding.. But it is a good start to know that there is much to learn, much below the surface and that there is misinformation out there that needs to be thought about and sorted through - it is easy to function here, but learning the puzzle will help create a deeper understanding… and it is fun too… Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
papayasalad Posted January 7, 2016 Share Posted January 7, 2016 I don't want learn Thai because I don't want to be too much involved in Thai gossips. your girlfriends or wife can take care of that. and as I don't want invest money here why learn Thai? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
villagefarang Posted January 7, 2016 Author Share Posted January 7, 2016 I don't want learn Thai because I don't want to be too much involved in Thai gossips. your girlfriends or wife can take care of that. and as I don't want invest money here why learn Thai? That is certainly your choice to make and in your case it may not make any difference. But then again you will never know for sure. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
huawei Posted January 7, 2016 Share Posted January 7, 2016 Having children, educating them properly, having your own business , dealing with corruption in your condo. All these types of things can be frustrating. As for the nuances of Thai life, even how a lady sits on the BTS can say a lot about them, is way beyond the understanding of most on here. Life isn't hard here if you are ignorant or impervious to what is going on around you. But it's hard not to be affected by injustices..this is a very unequal and cruel society. But overall your point is valid, unless you are poor. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jingthing Posted January 7, 2016 Share Posted January 7, 2016 Arguably, it's too easy. NOT if you want to be TVF poster of the year.................. You have to be a bit touched to want that innit. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
off road pat Posted January 7, 2016 Share Posted January 7, 2016 And all this to tell us things we knew already ???? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jingthing Posted January 7, 2016 Share Posted January 7, 2016 Arguably, it's too easy. NOT if you want to be TVF poster of the year.................. You have to be a bit touched to want that innit. In what way sugar.............Been there. Done that. For you perhaps never will you wear the POTY crown. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
1FinickyOne Posted January 7, 2016 Share Posted January 7, 2016 I don't want learn Thai because I don't want to be too much involved in Thai gossips. your girlfriends or wife can take care of that. and as I don't want invest money here why learn Thai? So that you can talk with the people, laugh and make jokes, make friends beyond only people who speak your language - some people have difficulty learning languages I think especially at an older age as you need to be able to hear well… If you can't easily learn a new language, I can understand that - but you say you don't want to - and that just seems like a bad attitude… I am sorry but you are missing a lot… Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ulic Posted January 7, 2016 Share Posted January 7, 2016 Life in Thailand is full of adventure with a few inconveniences. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
villagefarang Posted January 7, 2016 Author Share Posted January 7, 2016 Come on guys, the POTY contest is over. Its time to move on. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
billd766 Posted January 7, 2016 Share Posted January 7, 2016 I don't want learn Thai because I don't want to be too much involved in Thai gossips. your girlfriends or wife can take care of that. and as I don't want invest money here why learn Thai? So that you can talk with the people, laugh and make jokes, make friends beyond only people who speak your language - some people have difficulty learning languages I think especially at an older age as you need to be able to hear well… If you can't easily learn a new language, I can understand that - but you say you don't want to - and that just seems like a bad attitude… I am sorry but you are missing a lot… I agree and at 71 not only am I partly deaf I am also fairly tone deaf due to working on jet aircraft for years with no ear defenders. Thai being a tonal language what I do speak Thai what I think I said may come over completely differently to a Thai speaker. Fortunately my Thai family, neighbours and people I deal with in the village have become accustomed to my butchering their language and more or less understand what I want. When I try to explain that I am partly deaf they make some allowances and try to figure out what I meant from what I said. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aronp1 Posted January 7, 2016 Share Posted January 7, 2016 I've had nothing but a fantastic experience with very few negatives since coming here 3 years ago to live. I met my Thai Wife in the US and she's been pretty Americanized so I suppose I don't have the cultural issues like many expats do. Learning Thai shatters a whole lot of difficulties and issues with everyday life. It gets easier every day.So basically you just married another American. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aronp1 Posted January 7, 2016 Share Posted January 7, 2016 I don't want learn Thai because I don't want to be too much involved in Thai gossips. your girlfriends or wife can take care of that. and as I don't want invest money here why learn Thai? So that you can talk with the people, laugh and make jokes, make friends beyond only people who speak your language - some people have difficulty learning languages I think especially at an older age as you need to be able to hear well If you can't easily learn a new language, I can understand that - but you say you don't want to - and that just seems like a bad attitude I am sorry but you are missing a lot I agree with you kenk24. So many people move here but then don't want to adapt to their environment. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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