kingstonkid Posted February 8, 2016 Share Posted February 8, 2016 Just like in most countries family trumps everything. Chances are that she does not want to be away from her family. The fact that you want her to go as a GF and leave everything behind with no security is understandable by any countries standards. I thin that what you need to do is just marry her and give her a nest egg that if she gets lonely she can buy a ticket and leave to go home. Many Expats get married bring thier spouses to another country only to see that they get homesick and want to go home. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Farang99 Posted February 8, 2016 Share Posted February 8, 2016 Are you sure it isn't the gf who doesn't want to go? Many Thais have a difficult time leaving Thailand and their families. I wouldn't be so quick to say that other guys have that so easy. Also, many leave and get homesick and want to go back which is something you might consider. Cheers. My Thai wife was happy to go on holiday to UK, but has no desire to live anywhere else. Fortunately, neither do I. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
biggles45 Posted February 8, 2016 Share Posted February 8, 2016 Swap her for a Filipina, they can't wait to get out of the country !! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
1FinickyOne Posted February 8, 2016 Share Posted February 8, 2016 It sounds simply as though her parents and maybe the GF too just don't trust you, for whatever reason - you probably know - if you are a bit hotheaded, maybe they feel just cause for concern. You sound kind of angry and yes,, they pick up on that easily and it is not a plus for them. BTW - not easy for your GF to just go work in the states... I think you will just have to respect other peoples wishes, so you might do it graciously and then have better luck in the future.. But a nice post for all the negativos who feel that parents don't care about their kids. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wombat Posted February 8, 2016 Share Posted February 8, 2016 if mama says no then you are screwed...... "matriarchy" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NickJ Posted February 8, 2016 Share Posted February 8, 2016 Hire your own Monks...... From a bigger temple. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
catman20 Posted February 8, 2016 Share Posted February 8, 2016 find a new g/f that's wants to travel the world with you, no shortage of girl here this isn't the usa Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
williamgeorgeallen Posted February 8, 2016 Share Posted February 8, 2016 Get formally married with your girl friend paying a nice sinsod...and your future mother in law will change her mind very fast.... Tend to agree. MIL doesn't want you taking her daughter away and having your wicked way without that sin sod. Yes, I know you probably are already, but to her mum, letting her go away advertises it to all and sundry. No ring, no jewelry, no marriage, no sin sod. Mummy would get the piss taken out of her by the neighbors and family. Letting her "asset" go without getting all the up front payments first. this is good advice. letting the young unsopoilt (no babies or ex husbands) daughter go away for sinfull relationships lowers her sinsot value. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
paddyjoe41 Posted February 8, 2016 Share Posted February 8, 2016 Muzerally is correct but in the wrong way,when she has the sinsad its f o farang she can now marry her already thai BF she has had since school,only my opinion,there are quite a number of reasons for the mothers denial for her to travel,first one may be she does not love you,second her future has already been planned before you even thought of coming to Thailand,third,she can see her future as a married woman a long way off,dont forget she is only very young,just finished school.Now you can make life easy for her with money and lets face it thai girls are not slow to recognise that one.White lies come easy to all thai people especially females,and as we know for sure there are a big amount of women and girls married or living with farangs,that are already married around the corner or down the road and they manage to lead a double life without detection very very easy.many people would find that statement hard to believe but its a fact,ok if your not in thailand very long you may not have come across it,if you ask around im sure you wont have to go far to get the answer.So what im saying is just accept her mothers decision,you will find another very soon and every bit as nice and perhaps genuine and you will both be on your way to your country,and happy with it,dont be down in the dumps keep the old chin up,it works.Good luck to you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Morakot Posted February 8, 2016 Share Posted February 8, 2016 Now her mom says she cannot leave Thailand this year at all...something she was advised at the temple.... Best to get her a powerful amulet, so nothing will go wrong while she stays in Thailand. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blackheart Posted February 8, 2016 Share Posted February 8, 2016 My wife's mum misses her everyday but fortunately she does not get involved in Any of her children's business. They guided them and trust them to make the right choices, if they make a wrong choice they remain the same confident they will learn from it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mikiea Posted February 8, 2016 Share Posted February 8, 2016 Get formally married with your girl friend paying a nice sinsod...and your future mother in law will change her mind very fast.... do not listen to muzarella , she already has a Thai boy picked out by mom . run away as fast as you can . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Andyfez Posted February 8, 2016 Share Posted February 8, 2016 Working in a dead end job....... Hmmm has it occurred to you that the MIL is perhaps relying on that income, and if you offered to give her an allowance equivalent to that income, she may withdraw her objections? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
elgenon Posted February 8, 2016 Share Posted February 8, 2016 I took my former Thai GF to Australia, Singapore, Lao ALL over Thailand. Then she complained i NEVER took her anywhere. Go figure the mind of a Thai. I trust you asked her where she wanted to go. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Beats56 Posted February 8, 2016 Share Posted February 8, 2016 I know your gf is young and maybe this does not apply, but most educated Thai women don't want to leave Thailand for a "better" life in the West. This might have been the case in the past, but Thais today (FB) are aware that life in the West is a lonely, miserable affair. My wife is in contact with many women who moved to Canada and every single one is regretting the decision. Now, I know it's "Canada", but still...... Canada? Too cccccold, no Thai in their right mind will move to a place where it's winter most of the year. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Beats56 Posted February 8, 2016 Share Posted February 8, 2016 You ever been to Canada? It is not cold most of the year. Hot as here in the summer. Same weather as Michigan, New York, Maine in the US. If you don't like snow move to Vancouver. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
smotherb Posted February 8, 2016 Share Posted February 8, 2016 So many of you say Thais don't want to leave Thailand. I find that hard to believe because I have met many Thais overseas and know many Thais who have gone overseas. One thing which seems probable is that Thais who speak no other language are more apprehensive about going overseas. The old buggyboo about being sold in to sex-slavery is exactly that, an old buggyboo. In 1967, my Vietnamese gf's mother mutter those same words. In 1982, my Filipina gf's mother said that too. Just last month, my son's Thai wife's mother made the same comment. Now, I am sure it has happened, but then so has winning the lottery. As long as the girl is old enough, their mommy does not have a legal say. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chicowoodduck Posted February 8, 2016 Share Posted February 8, 2016 Just thank your lucky stars and move on....??? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheCruncher Posted February 8, 2016 Share Posted February 8, 2016 If the monks said something, your girlfriend, her mother and all the other family members will believe it 100% Last year my wife went to a temple, told a monk about my situation. Bring your husband here to the temple, i will make him walk again. !! WHAT !! i AM PARAPLEGIC. Will never walk again. Would my wife listen to me. No way the monk said he can fix your back. After 3 days of argument i gave in was carried to the car, taken to the temple. Lay on the floor for 3 days. Monk visited me for 5 minutes each day, massaging my back. Oh i can feel his back is getting better. F..k this we are going home i said.Darling monk says it is getting better. My wife believed the sh..e he was saying. Today 6 months after the temple my back is still the same. You should have stayed longer Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HerbalEd Posted February 8, 2016 Share Posted February 8, 2016 Regarding your "My gf's mom won't let her leave Thailand...." Assuming your gf is of legal age, it's not your gf's mom's call, it's your gf's. If indeed she is that controlled by her mom, then I'd think about dropping her because it's only going to get worse as time goes on ... and could get even more so if you marry her. Bet, hey ... I don't know the people or the whole story, so who am I to say? Although you did ask. 555 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
giddyup Posted February 8, 2016 Share Posted February 8, 2016 Regarding your "My gf's mom won't let her leave Thailand...." Assuming your gf is of legal age, it's not your gf's mom's call, it's your gf's. If indeed she is that controlled by her mom, then I'd drop her because it's only going to get worse as time goes on ... and will probably get even more devious if you marry her. Can you make your text a little larger, my eyesight ain't that great. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gawaterman Posted February 8, 2016 Share Posted February 8, 2016 Swap her for a Filipina, they can't wait to get out of the country !! Yeah, but from what I have seen, all of her family will soon be joining you Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chilli42 Posted February 8, 2016 Share Posted February 8, 2016 Ya I am not sure but she always is crying after these "talks" with her mom...she just graduated college and its perfect gap year time for her...she is working a dead end job and I think what my gf really wants is to go to the US to work for awhile and "save for the future" ... making 300 bht a day vs 400 bht per hour is the big appeal for her....I really do believe her mom is putting the kabosh...I mean a week in SG whats up witha big fat no to that? Actually it was her cousin who said no...who we would need to cover for her...her mom wasn't even asked...her mom is super freaked out that her daughter may be living with me...which she is and has been for a year...unbeknownst to the family...and she is also super freaked out her daughter will be sold into sex slavery or something weird if she travels abroad...bs man.... How old is your gf, 13? If she can't make a decision without mom's OK on something like this you are in for a very unhappy ride later in the relationship when dear old mom starts asking for money, house, hospital bills etc etc. This is a golden opportunity to evaluate the long term potential of your relationship with this girl. If she can't make her own decision on sometthing so simple as this then time to cut bait and run. Listening to this story my instinct is that it's an excuse either fabricated by your gf or a convenient excuse that may have come from the mother. Either way, you are being lied to and manipulated ... see action point above. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HerbalEd Posted February 8, 2016 Share Posted February 8, 2016 Regarding your "My gf's mom won't let her leave Thailand...." Assuming your gf is of legal age, it's not your gf's mom's call, it's your gf's. If indeed she is that controlled by her mom, then I'd drop her because it's only going to get worse as time goes on ... and will probably get even more devious if you marry her. Can you make your text a little larger, my eyesight ain't that great. Sorry., but on my computer I have the font size set at a rather large 22 points because my eyesight ain't that great either. You should easily be able to very quickly ... and temporarily ... boost the size of fonts, etc. on your screen. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Puccini Posted February 8, 2016 Share Posted February 8, 2016 From he OP: First she said no to a week in SG... What does SG mean? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sir charles IV Posted February 8, 2016 Share Posted February 8, 2016 Guys don't waste your time with this dude. A 40+ man dating a teenager who based on previous post thinks he's a teenager with grand dreams and showing off etc. not surprised the in-laws trying to palm him off the Thai way ( monk said cannot!!! Lol). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
farang95 Posted February 8, 2016 Share Posted February 8, 2016 the family link is very strong..... but ....we all know that Love can make the impossible ...possible...... true love is complicate in our generation i guess...... Try to know more about your gf... its look like you don't know much about her.... Like someone said previously ..that the problem with young girl....ofc the link is strong with the mother? its her mother damn..... If she want to move on from her mother she will .....if she do not want she won't..... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
georgemandm Posted February 8, 2016 Share Posted February 8, 2016 I know your gf is young and maybe this does not apply, but most educated Thai women don't want to leave Thailand for a "better" life in the West. This might have been the case in the past, but Thais today (FB) are aware that life in the West is a lonely, miserable affair. My wife is in contact with many women who moved to Canada and every single one is regretting the decision. Now, I know it's "Canada", but still...... Yes it could be very true in Canada and I think it would be very cold for Thais .But here in Australia I have thai friends and they love this place because of their very hard work here have a great life now and just go to thailand for holidays and tell me will never ever what to move back to thailand. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Morakot Posted February 8, 2016 Share Posted February 8, 2016 I took my former Thai GF to Australia, Singapore, Lao ALL over Thailand. Then she complained i NEVER took her anywhere. Go figure the mind of a Thai. I trust you asked her where she wanted to go. Yep, all she wanted was going to the department store... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
D3030 Posted February 8, 2016 Share Posted February 8, 2016 Ya I am not sure but she always is crying after these "talks" with her mom...she just graduated college and its perfect gap year time for her...she is working a dead end job and I think what my gf really wants is to go to the US to work for awhile and "save for the future" ... making 300 bht a day vs 400 bht per hour is the big appeal for her....I really do believe her mom is putting the kabosh...I mean a week in SG whats up witha big fat no to that? Actually it was her cousin who said no...who we would need to cover for her...her mom wasn't even asked...her mom is super freaked out that her daughter may be living with me...which she is and has been for a year...unbeknownst to the family...and she is also super freaked out her daughter will be sold into sex slavery or something weird if she travels abroad...bs man....Not really BS.. Your prize at the end of the rainbow is she gets to work for $2.00 an hour above the minimum wage McDonald's pays in the States?I know a guy - will call him Bruce from the UK - had unlimited amounts of money - after marrying his Thai wife he thought they could travel the world and settle down - had a room ready at his house, and a nanny all set up in the UK for the baby they were having, When it came time for her to apply for a visa, she refused to get one, came up with every excuse not to go - and used those same reasons you described for not wanting to go.. She just did not want to leave her family... They're not together anymore.. So, your not alone... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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