Wife diagnosed as HIV+

[Jingthing]

Practice safe sex all the time. Don't listen to people who say differently unless you're willing to go on PrEP therapy.

Wrong again, do you have HIV? I have been positive for over 5 years, my wife and I do not use safe sex, she has no virus in her and we are currently doing ICSI treatment to have a child.

I'll ignore your baiting question. Irrelevant either way.

I see the ICSI treatment involves an egg outside the female's body.

So that's not a risk to the adult partner as unprotected sex would be.

I see you added info about the sperm ... I assumed that, but it's interesting info.

Going on a public forum and suggesting that negative partners have unprotected sex with HIV plus partners seems to me to be irresponsible.

[Sheryl]

Actually the issue is rather complex. For sure there is a risk of infection and safe sex must be ptacticed as long as virus is detectable in the blood. But the risk is extremely liw once virus is undetectable. No health professiobal is going to want to take responsibility for telling you that you can skip condoms at that point as the research on this hasn't been done and for obvious ethical reasons can't be. But studies of couples who decided on their own to skip condoms after the infected partner's VL became undetectable have shown few if any infections. The main risk would be that there might be a resurgence of virus in the blood due to drug resistance and that it doesn't get picked up on for some months and you get infected in the interim.

But for OP of course safe sex is essential, wife has just been newly diagnosed.

[JHolmesJr]

Please tell your wife not to share this news with any other thai relative….thais are very ignorant about things like HIV….and behave terribly towards people who are brave enough to share their condition.

Good luck.

[seedy]

Post with misleading info - and Quoted Replies - removed

Also Troll / Flaming post Edited

[harrry]

OP, please don't overreact, even when the diagnosis might have hit you like a hammer.

First of all you'll have to wait for another- hopefully not positive- test result. These tests sometimes show the wrong results.

And even if she's got the virus, no reason to give up. All hospitals these days have the right treatment, the CD 4 count and virus load will be very important to decide if medication is needed, or not.

If she needs medicine, she can get this medication at a government hospital for almost nothing, or using her 30 baht card.

If you've got some questions you don't want to discuss here, please page me.

"Then Public Health Minister, Mongkol Na Songkhla, abolished the 30 baht co-payment and made the UC scheme free." - It was abolished years ago.

And it was reinstated under the Yingluck Government. It is possible not to pay but you have to plead poverty.

My best wishes to the OP and his wife. I hope and know that if you both care for yourseves you will have long and happy lives. Fortunately it is not like the problem that it was some years ago.

[Jingthing]

Actually the issue is rather complex. For sure there is a risk of infection and safe sex must be ptacticed as long as virus is detectable in the blood. But the risk is extremely liw once virus is undetectable. No health professiobal is going to want to take responsibility for telling you that you can skip condoms at that point as the research on this hasn't been done and for obvious ethical reasons can't be. But studies of couples who decided on their own to skip condoms after the infected partner's VL became undetectable have shown few if any infections. The main risk would be that there might be a resurgence of virus in the blood due to drug resistance and that it doesn't get picked up on for some months and you get infected in the interim.

But for OP of course safe sex is essential, wife has just been newly diagnosed.

Very good, doctors won't go there, so nor should we be broadcasting on a widely read forum that it's OK to have unprotected sex with a positive partner.

[harrry]

It is possibly good for people to know that information.

Personally I think if I were in that situation I would still use a condom but condoms cannot help some forms of sex and with those there is normally a lower risk and this information could help someone regarding that.

[andre47]

Please tell your wife not to share this news with any other thai relative….thais are very ignorant about things like HIV….and behave terribly towards people who are brave enough to share their condition.

Good luck.

Yes, Don't let her share this information with anybody. Not only Thai people are behaving bad if they know that somebody is infected. Many farang behave very bad as well.

[beano2274]

am not going to add any more comments about practicing safe sex, only those with partners and with the infection know how things go, I have spoken to three doctors in Europe about it and since my levels are sooooo low they said it could be okay, and it has been okay for over three years now

[Jingthing]

am not going to add any more comments about practicing safe sex, only those with partners and with the infection know how things go, I have spoken to three doctors in Europe about it and since my levels are sooooo low they said it could be okay, and it has been okay for over three years now

I respect that but we're dealing with a general public that often thinks there is no risk of female to male transmission regardless of viral load, and the OP's situation is female to male.

[Deke]

For the OP. if you are in the Bangkok area, Bamrasnaradura (Bamras) Hospital, attached to the Ministry of Public Health in Nonthaburi, has a clinic that specializes in HIV treatment. One of my employees has been treated there for several years and the cost of treatment is paid for from her social security insurance.

[andre47]

It is possibly good for people to know that information.

Personally I think if I were in that situation I would still use a condom but condoms cannot help some forms of sex and with those there is normally a lower risk and this information could help someone regarding that.

Condoms cannot help some forms of sex? What do you mean?

The only way to infect somebody with HIV is through blood to blood contact. Oral sex and kissing cannot infect somebody. Especially the infection from female to male is not easy.

The use of condoms is the only way to prevent an infection and it is sufficient. Condoms should be used and then there is no real risk.

I don't see a reason to inform anybody about the infection if condoms are used.

[Jingthing]

Oral sex is not fully risk free for HIV transmission.

Lower risk, yes, no risk, no.

Condoms if they don't break work for preventing HIV transmission, but they sometimes break and often people don't use them correctly.

There are other STDs people can get even with proper use of condoms.

[Sheryl]

Please stay on topic. The issue is not how HIV is/isn't transmitted. It is how best a real person with HIV should get care.

[jimmiejackson]

Thanks for the info to those posters that have provided some, I appreciate the support.

At the moment we haven't told anyone that know us personally and I think we'll keep it that way, it's a private matter after all.

Once we have more info next week I'll post an update.

[manxninja]

I wish the OP all the best on the long road ahead, im sure it want be easy.

To be honest I probably had unprotected sex with at least 700-1000 ladies both in western and Asian countries, without catching anything.

Life is like that, but the new medicine available should help your other half lead a full life.

[pedro01]

I have nothing to add other than my best wishes for both of you.

I hope she stays healthy and that this doesn't tear the two of you apart.

Stay strong.

[Sheryl]

The Red Cross told her last week that the SSF will only pay for medication if her CD4 was below 500 (at least that's what I remember she told me, I'm still new to this!) and that if it was above and she still wanted the drugs anyway she would need to pay. From what Sheryl says this is incorrect, which is great news, seems strange that the Red Cross wouldn't know that though.

Prior to 2014 it was indeed MoPH policy to pay for meds only when the CD4 was below a certain threshold but this changed with the 2014 guidelines (and in keeping with international recommendations). AFAIK, Hospitals in the SSF scheme are expected to follow MoPH guidelines. IF it should happen that she gets flak about the meds please get back to me. The SSF Office and some HIV advocacy groups can help. Other TV members have been through this.

The SSF works on a capitation basis, they get a set amount per person enrolled so the hospitals have a financial incentive to try to minimize how much they spend on a given patient and from their point of view, someone with a lifelong need for relatively costly meds and tests is a liability, so don't be surprised if they out up some initial resistance. You are looking at a lifetime recurrent cost so it is well worth the battle to make the system cover this as they should.

[inbangkok]

Thanks for the info to those posters that have provided some, I appreciate the support.

At the moment we haven't told anyone that know us personally and I think we'll keep it that way, it's a private matter after all.

Once we have more info next week I'll post an update.

The stigma with HIV is bad enough in the West.... It is far worse here. A good portion of Thai people have no understanding at all regarding this virus and behave as of it is transmitted like the common cold. If you don't already know.....you can Google the news story about how an HIV/AIDS care center that was forced out of Chon Buri because the locals thought it would affect their property values and some other bullshit. Apparently there are no official (or at the very least enforced) laws preventing discrimination based on this disease in Thailand which is horrible.

So yes, your decision about keeping this private it a good choice..... Maybe even think twice about telling people you do personally know. Best of luck.

[JHolmesJr]

Especially never tell family, theyre the worst

[jimmiejackson]

The Red Cross told her last week that the SSF will only pay for medication if her CD4 was below 500 (at least that's what I remember she told me, I'm still new to this!) and that if it was above and she still wanted the drugs anyway she would need to pay. From what Sheryl says this is incorrect, which is great news, seems strange that the Red Cross wouldn't know that though.

Prior to 2014 it was indeed MoPH policy to pay for meds only when the CD4 was below a certain threshold but this changed with the 2014 guidelines (and in keeping with international recommendations). AFAIK, Hospitals in the SSF scheme are expected to follow MoPH guidelines. IF it should happen that she gets flak about the meds please get back to me. The SSF Office and some HIV advocacy groups can help. Other TV members have been through this.

The SSF works on a capitation basis, they get a set amount per person enrolled so the hospitals have a financial incentive to try to minimize how much they spend on a given patient and from their point of view, someone with a lifelong need for relatively costly meds and tests is a liability, so don't be surprised if they out up some initial resistance. You are looking at a lifetime recurrent cost so it is well worth the battle to make the system cover this as they should.

Thanks for your detailed help. If she doesn't get what she's meant to treatment wise I'll let you know and I would be grateful for any pointers you might be able to give me. Should know more later this week hopefully.

[bigt3116]

OP, please don't overreact, even when the diagnosis might have hit you like a hammer.

First of all you'll have to wait for another- hopefully not positive- test result. These tests sometimes show the wrong results.

And even if she's got the virus, no reason to give up. All hospitals these days have the right treatment, the CD 4 count and virus load will be very important to decide if medication is needed, or not.

If she needs medicine, she can get this medication at a government hospital for almost nothing, or using her 30 baht card.

If you've got some questions you don't want to discuss here, please page me.

"Then Public Health Minister, Mongkol Na Songkhla, abolished the 30 baht co-payment and made the UC scheme free." - It was abolished years ago.

And it was reinstated under the Yingluck Government. It is possible not to pay but you have to plead poverty.

My best wishes to the OP and his wife. I hope and know that if you both care for yourseves you will have long and happy lives. Fortunately it is not like the problem that it was some years ago.

Are you sure?

Yingluck vows feasibility study into 30-baht scheme

10 Jan 2012 at 00:00

COPY TEXTSAVE PDFEMAILPRINT TEXT

Prime Minister Yingluck Shinawatra is greeted at the Public Health Ministry by consumer rights groups which disagree with a plan to revive the 30-baht universal health scheme, one of Pheu Thai’s flagship election platforms. TAWATCHAI KEMGUMNERD

[Jing Joe]

These words of Jimmie's hit me most;- "I'm certainly not rich but of course I want to make sure she gets the best treatment and that comes first" .

The "morons" have kept away and happily so, and your words Jimmie reflect so much of the unconditional love you have for your wife.

The very best has come out of the hearts of followers with good advice and yes as xxx said, thoughts and prayers for you both.

[RichardColeman]

Should not impact too much on your life - few tablets here, etc. But you can still have perfectly healthy HIV free children if you want kids and take the right precautions. I know many people in UK with HIV and happy to talk..

[hobobo]

A close friend has been living with full-blown Aids for 14 years now, and looks better than he did before (he was overweight). During the first six months it is recommended to have check-ups more frequently until the right medicine regimen is established. Now he has a check up (CD4 & viral load) every three months and full liver function once a year. As many posters mentioned, a positive attitude is as important as medical treatment.

I wish you both well, and remember: live well, and look forward to the future!

[Sheryl]

A post flaming another member has been removed.

[Sheryl]

Hobobo, your friend has not benn living with "full blown AIDS" for 14 years. He may have had it at first but since then what he has, is HIV, not AIDS. The OP's wife, having been diagnosed while still asymptomatic, need never develop AIDS.

[1FinickyOne]

Best of luck to you - and rewarding to know you are supporting your wife 100% - life can throw some funny stuff at us but having integrity and character is the best defence.

Only can add that I have been told of one fellow locally who became quite thin and sickly and is now healthy and living an active life... I do not ask questions. I have been told taking some sort of meds, maybe a cocktail of sorts.

Best wishes to both you and your wife.

[Jing Joe]

Resend.

These words of Jimmie's hit me most;- "I'm certainly not rich but of course I want to make sure she gets the best treatment and that comes first" .

The "morons" have kept away and happily so, and your words Jimmie reflect so much of the unconditional love you have for your wife.

The very best has come out of the hearts of followers with good advice and yes as tonrae said, thoughts and prayers for you both.

(Sorry tonrae, I had internet troubles when I went searching for your name to quote and was too late to edit.)

[peterpan2501]

As y am sexually very active and change partners often, also not like wear condoms y go test HIV with new partners at Clinic Soi Buakhaow in Pattaya 300 B per test...

In 2014. 3 of them was tested positive!!! We then been retesting in Pattaya Memorial Hospital because the quick tests are not 100% sure. But same result...

1 of them never seen again...2. one work like before in a bar without speaking with me anymore...

But nr. 3 y told here go to a Governement Hospital for 30 Baht treating where she received free medicine and medical care.But its very important to take the medicines always at same time and from time to time need check blood again for sometimes adjusting of medicine. Now she live with nearly no side effects...

My neighbour in province is also HIV -positive for over 15 years, she still work on farm and receive a small Pension from governement abt.5 or 600 baht a month.

So you can see, with good Treatment life can continues nearly normal.....

Good Luck to you and your wife