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my girlfriend says she cannot manage on 25000 month

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A 21 year old hooker is far cheaper.

And one of those kids isn't even yours. Thai men won't go near a woman who has a kid from someone else; only

dumb ass foreigners do.

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Like a ripe grapefruit. Or, maybe they have large vet bills for sick buffalo(s)? It is more likely that she now finds herself the rich person in her very extended family and their friends as well. If this is the case, it is almost impossible for her to say no. You need to be the bad guy. Send her an email and tell her she has to live on a budget. I have let to met a Thai woman who understands the concept of a budget, so list all of the things that would normally go into a budget including the ones that are already paid for including a line item for money to help her family.

My thinking is that at the end of the day some of the decision comes down to how much money you could send her and not feel it. Whatever that amount is, the important part is to cap it and let her know what you expect. She can show her family the budget and this might take some of the heat off her.

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I think you should get off your ass and go there and spend a few months there yourself! Times have changed when we were young and even in Thailand, today kids need what we had and a hundred times more! Sure she could be ripping you off only you know her? Do you think she is doing that?

For whatever reason women in Thailand have been condition to think they must be the bread winners for their parents while in general the guys do nothing. I would be surprise if she isn't helping the parents in some form. Thailand isn't the West!

What I can tell you and I've been in your position asking the same question from afar wondering at the same time I have plenty of money to spend on myself while someone else is raising the kids. Each day whether you are there or not, the more she is married to you or not she becomes more like a farang. She and your kids need the same things you wish for yourself otherwise she might have married and have kids by a useless Thai !

I hear this a lot and it is their opinion that living in Isaan one does not need as much money! I think you have to live there been there in your shoes to know. Looking at the amount you are sending the number of kids and her surrounding I would disagree she is socking a lot of money away on you. Reality thing breakdown, people get sick, kids need toys, clothes, etc... I really need to go on and explain it to you and everyone. Prices are cheaper for some things but not many. What the prices are at Big C, in Bangkok or Pattaya aren't much different in Isaan, car, motorbike, gas, etc.. I've been there particularly in Sukhothai.

You took on the responsibility so do so! Not saying you should now send 100,000 a month. But you might want to cut back on the coffee, beer, etc.. luxury each day you most likely enjoy but don't consider it to be? The money you save you be surprise could translate addition 5,000 or 10,000 baht a month without a loss in your enjoyment!

Thai teachers, some with more kids than her, survive on a lot less than 25,000 baht a month. The kids do not suffer, and most of these families lead quite a comfortable life.

So my advice to her is, to get off her big fat Arse and get a job, if not, go back on the game.

The reality is this... she isn't with a Thai Teacher, living in a Thai matter? She is with a foreigner if she wanted to live like a Thai why in the hell did she have two kids with him. Having two kids with a foreigner the expectation here is to have a better life. Just last year a MP, was quoted in a interview in the Bangkok Post in regards to Isaan women. " if you want a better life marry a foreigner " The truth hurts that is why after the interview he was removed from his office!

The problem is your western thinking trying to apply it here in Thailand. If she was making a living in a bar/go-go, making for example 40,000 a month and someone falls in love with her and want her out of the business. You think love is going to make everything right for her and her family? Most of the time the guy think it does? In Asia, sure love exist but in general unless it is a better or easier life they might as well stick to their own kind. This is a tough concept for foreigners to accept! Sure you might be right get her fat ass back to work, but the BM took that away when he locked her up with two more kids! End of story for me!

For your information, she has ONE kid by him.

Yes you are right! I mistake the 2 year old for two kids, But that doesn't change any of my comments! Give something more to justify your position than I getting the number of kids wrong. Stats will show having a 2 year old, it is very trying time for them. They get sick a lot and I mean a lot that is why if you were to have a medical policy the premium is high for a 2 year old. And before some idiot comes here and say I'm wrong they are Thai National let them use the NHS, 30 baht Please! As noted, she isn't really Thai any longer. Then he has taken on the GF, kid too! Today, even in Thailand they have to keep up with the Jones, I-Phones, Samsung, you think these are just western concept?

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She is Thai, the daughter is Thai, and the son is Luk Kreung.

Money does not change anyone's nationality.

When the daughter (who is Thai) reaches her teenage years, and the OP tries to show some authority, as in telling her she should not be doing this or that, her answer will be '<deleted> off, you are not my father'.

That will be the appreciation he gets for throwing money at them, to, as you say, keep them up with the Jones'.

And for your information, the same doctors treat people on the 30 baht scheme, as well as the extortionate private hospitals.

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Like a ripe grapefruit. Or, maybe they have large vet bills for sick buffalo(s)? It is more likely that she now finds herself the rich person in her very extended family and their friends as well. If this is the case, it is almost impossible for her to say no. You need to be the bad guy. Send her an email and tell her she has to live on a budget. I have let to met a Thai woman who understands the concept of a budget, so list all of the things that would normally go into a budget including the ones that are already paid for including a line item for money to help her family.

My thinking is that at the end of the day some of the decision comes down to how much money you could send her and not feel it. Whatever that amount is, the important part is to cap it and let her know what you expect. She can show her family the budget and this might take some of the heat off her.

Another sound respond to the situation. It is not easy to have such a conversation with a Thai. Last survey done by their own country that 70% plus have no idea what budgeting is all about. And when they hit the lottery by napping a Foreigner it gets worse, They know in Thailand everyone is not rich but when it comes to a foreigner they simple do not believe that to be the case. So when we talk about not being rich and we go to the ATM and bang get 15,000 at a time, drink coffee and beer like it was water, eat 500 baht meals without a second thought and still say we do not have money why should they believe us.

Once they nap on to a foreigner they start to lose their identity as Thai. they just don't understand it that friends and family look at them as if they are a ATM.. People come out of the woodwork to borrow money. The % of Thai women who are hooked up with a foreigner that care less what people think of them and can say no to their family and friends are far and few as they say?

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yes my kids and don't work

So i guess it near survive..

just only may be have full calories food

not sure it be full vitamine..

how about sport for kid?

any add class?

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She has to take care of her Thai Husband, Mom & Dad and herself! She needs more sucker!

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I think you should get off your ass and go there and spend a few months there yourself! Times have changed when we were young and even in Thailand, today kids need what we had and a hundred times more! Sure she could be ripping you off only you know her? Do you think she is doing that?

For whatever reason women in Thailand have been condition to think they must be the bread winners for their parents while in general the guys do nothing. I would be surprise if she isn't helping the parents in some form. Thailand isn't the West!

What I can tell you and I've been in your position asking the same question from afar wondering at the same time I have plenty of money to spend on myself while someone else is raising the kids. Each day whether you are there or not, the more she is married to you or not she becomes more like a farang. She and your kids need the same things you wish for yourself otherwise she might have married and have kids by a useless Thai !

I hear this a lot and it is their opinion that living in Isaan one does not need as much money! I think you have to live there been there in your shoes to know. Looking at the amount you are sending the number of kids and her surrounding I would disagree she is socking a lot of money away on you. Reality thing breakdown, people get sick, kids need toys, clothes, etc... I really need to go on and explain it to you and everyone. Prices are cheaper for some things but not many. What the prices are at Big C, in Bangkok or Pattaya aren't much different in Isaan, car, motorbike, gas, etc.. I've been there particularly in Sukhothai.

You took on the responsibility so do so! Not saying you should now send 100,000 a month. But you might want to cut back on the coffee, beer, etc.. luxury each day you most likely enjoy but don't consider it to be? The money you save you be surprise could translate addition 5,000 or 10,000 baht a month without a loss in your enjoyment!

Thai teachers, some with more kids than her, survive on a lot less than 25,000 baht a month. The kids do not suffer, and most of these families lead quite a comfortable life.

So my advice to her is, to get off her big fat Arse and get a job, if not, go back on the game.

The reality is this... she isn't with a Thai Teacher, living in a Thai matter? She is with a foreigner if she wanted to live like a Thai why in the hell did she have two kids with him. Having two kids with a foreigner the expectation here is to have a better life. Just last year a MP, was quoted in a interview in the Bangkok Post in regards to Isaan women. " if you want a better life marry a foreigner " The truth hurts that is why after the interview he was removed from his office!

The problem is your western thinking trying to apply it here in Thailand. If she was making a living in a bar/go-go, making for example 40,000 a month and someone falls in love with her and want her out of the business. You think love is going to make everything right for her and her family? Most of the time the guy think it does? In Asia, sure love exist but in general unless it is a better or easier life they might as well stick to their own kind. This is a tough concept for foreigners to accept! Sure you might be right get her fat ass back to work, but the BM took that away when he locked her up with two more kids! End of story for me!

If you had read the OP you would have seen that only one of the children was his. That said both kids deserved to be treated equally, The older girl at 9 is still not at the stage of a teenager in Mor4 who NEEDS an Iphone....top model and Laptop and an unlimited phone and data card...not that they should get all they want.

The money you send is more than enough for all needs and to help the parents. It is on the high side when housing is not a need. More is a sign of a problem, either with her needs..gambling or drugs or worse of your relationship.

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thank you for your reply. if you take away items like car. reduce scooter to 1 and do not go to the cinema which I do not think would apply to the op. the cost comes down to about 16000 thb a month. I know I spend a bit more than you do but the biggest cost is hotels as we go away a lot of weekends. I again thank you for your reply

I do not say how much i spend. i just show its easy can get 40k per month even more

with out any not normal spending and even not talk about lux or some Western style.

And you do not see i am even not talking about spend for clothes for me and wife

for children school/university add class etc..

Buy electronic or electric stuff..

Now wife dauther go university its + give she for room and life..

and i didnt count some relax on weekend or not weekendthumbsup.gif

I just write all first think come to my head and then get near 40 k stop

and yes can survive on 10k even maybe less

20-40 b thai meal.

not open air

not any hobby/ sport for children and self and etc..

but its life what some want for they children?sad.png

wai.gif

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At the end of the day it is easy to take the plss out of a pnssy.

Id wager a bet that before meeting the farang this bird was an average Thai that could live on under 10k a month.

som tum, water from osmosis machine, public clinic health, the type who would get free bus or cheap baht bus

Now she has the farang its imported food, imported spring water, resort holidays, expensive private hispitals and probably her own driver with the car the farang bought.

When its his money they will also tip all and sundry excessively, trying to be the next hi-so around town.

Unfortunate for the OP, but he created this Frankenbaht monster since the first day of these free handouts.

He has probably realised the cash flow aint just gonna last another xx years.

I do feel for him though since he has a kiddy to her.

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4.one time per week go with family/son to cinem/ scate 1500*4= 6000

and this NOT WESTERN STYLE!!!! even not near

Sorry pal, that's not Thai style either. No average Thai would spend 6000 baht a week taking their family out.

we talk about averge Thai?

and do not 6000 per week

1500 per week in month near 4 weeks so 1500*4=6000

its near ..+ - few hundred Bath..

PS

i just show HOW easy can get 40000 with out any sky fly or lux or EVEN western style thinks for many foreigners what whey do in home country with they children.. normal work people..

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I have lived in Isaan for many years, I know Thai Isaan folk who have nice jobs, have a family and live on way under 25k.

OP's bird has NO X's and can't manage on 25k, that is rubbish...

But, birds who lasoo a farang seem to think they are now in the hi-so bracket, her friends think so too, there lies the OP's problem..

hi-so bracket

cheesy.gif

You again say bla bla?

please you ad - it for you, or for Thai isaan folk you knowbiggrin.png

Thai Isaan folk may be can survive on 10k

but Not many foreigner want this is life for they children.

But you get som point

big chance child OP even not have what have "Thai Isaan folk" you know " live on way under 25k"

biggrin.png

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Great thread !

I don't think this guy is for real for starters .

If he has been with her for 5 years , he would certainly know the ropes by now .

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If the guy was not giving her 25k she would have a job of some sort earning 200bht a day, not the 800+ she has now. Mum would be looking after the kids, that's how folk do it here.

Seeing stuff in LOS over many years I can guarantee if he ups the amount now in the future it will be asked to up again...

I know a few who had to much in there pocket and got on the "cards" train, get hooked, lose and keep going back more and lose again. Not saying this is happening with the OP but.....

blink.png If the guy was not giving her 25k she would have a job of some sort earning 200bht

Pleasread carefully.

with our 2 year old son

Son for you its nothing?

blink.png

its OP son..

You are one of the reasons frarangs are being ripped off...

Sorry my english so poor

so can you give me meaning "frarang" .. not see this is word in any English dictonary..

And I am sorry you be being ripped off..

It's not my fault

but i am so sorry ,, sad.png

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