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Issan Women


JGV

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Immerse yourself in Isaan and you'll find her! There are literally thousands of good Isaan women that dream of having a good Farang BF/husband. Many of them really don't want to marry Thai guys for various reasons.

This is my opinion also, ......about the various reasons. It is something I have imagined as being the truth, without having heard it said first hand.

My list;

1. Woman has duties toward her family and must have a good provider (which most Thai men are not)

2. Thai guys tend to play around and have many gf (that they all tell; "I love only you")

3. Thai guys tend to be less respectful towards woman than Farang (oftentimes)

4. A Thai guy will choose a single lady with no children and no "past life", but not contemplate the single mother that have been around the block as they are not as prestigious a catch. Farang tend to care less about that aspect but think more of the "now" and the "future" not of the past. A kid more or less is not a financial issue for a Farang.

Am I anywhere close?

What are your known reasons?

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fair call, I think, but it doesn't encapsulate all the reasons

A Farang most likeley will be more a man of the world and better educated. That might be a big issue. I´d sure like to see some more bona fide reasons. Get those keyboards rattling guys! :o

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Adding my two cents !

If you want to find a fine Isaan woman, this is a highly simplified course of what you should do:

Travel around Isaan for a few weeks until you find a smallish village you feel comfortable in.

Find a place to stay another few weeks, go to local weekly markets to show yourself as eligible.

Let grandmas around the village know you’re looking for a wife/ girlfriend.

Socialize al little bit!

Within weeks, as people get comfortable with you , you’ll be inundated with offers good & bad.

Your gem will be there for the taking , before you do, you must get some cultural education to understand what is expected of you if you never lived in Thailand or just seen it through it’s night life !

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If you want to insure the fidelity of your wife in Issan, you need to relize her and her family are one and the same.

You can read some of my earlier post about my wife, and our relationship. As I had said earlier, she comes from a small ethinic group of Suay...last night she was talking to her mother in the village. After the conversation (in Suay so I would not listen in), she hung up the phone and gave me a big kiss, saying thank you, I love you so much, and your wisdom is number 1.

What had happened was 6 months ago my father-in-law had died. Her mother having a typical Thai village house sitting 3 meter in the air, wanted to close in the bottom of the house. I had interviened, and as we were going to have to supply the money for the re-modeling, I insisted it be done "my way".

Well we bought the best tile, tall windows, a huge carved front door, insulated the walls, and painted the whole top/bottom of the house 1st with a primer, then with the paint, and re-did the roof with tile instead of the corigated tin that was standard in the village. An Amrican style bathroom, with warm shower, and an indoor kitchen. Saw that the floors, window trim and interior wall were color cordinated.

Now her mother is VERY PROUD, as everybody call is the Falang house, money come from the USA. Nobody every imagined having a such a high style house in a small village. Her aunt is very jelous and has gone to Bangkok to try and borrow some money from some relitives to re-do her house. This makes her mother very proud because her sister-in-law always was #1 in the village before. Nowshe is #1.

The workmen that come from Surin or anther village help the myth when is the norm, "how much is cost??" They reply,,,,"Everything #1 quality, very expensive, do not need, but very pretty".

I had suspected this would be the outcome of investing about 500,000 baht in remodeling this home. I had remembered a story my wife told me 8 years ago about a niece that lives in another village. She had come home from Germany after being married to a Falang for 5 years. In talking with her mother, (who he had built million baht home for) told her that she was going to divorce her husband and marry his friend that had a lot more money. Her mother took a stick and hit her daughter threating to sell to some Arabs if she did something like this.

A bit different reaction that some typical Thais might have??? I hope all Suay people have this ethic, and I know my investment will pay off with the support from her mother. So far in 10 years of marriage, I have never seen any danger signs of my marriage being in danger.

So for the OP, do as my name suggest, get out of the bars and wander in the country side. (Buy a motorcycle, get lost , ask directions. You will proably be asked to join for some food, Thai people love to eat)

I know when I go home I will have many people ask me if I know a falang looking for a wife. They all point to my wife and her mother and say, "see what happens when you marry a Falang".

I met my wife in a resturant as I was trying to order food and the waitress could not understand my Thai. She was at another table with 2 lao girls that worked for her. She offered to translate....and the rest is history.

They are out there just go and find them. But 1st find out about the culture, the traditions, and family. Then decide if you want to be a part of it.

You cannot turn these people into your culture, they will always be Thai. It is up to you to adopt the ways they have and help show them a better way, without compromising their own beliefs.

It is the mixture of culture and beauty that attracts so many of us to be here with them. Do not try and change it too much. Better to accept some things, and have peace and harmony...

Exsmple: I had a home I wanted to buy, but somebody had died in it. My wife really insisted she would not sleep ther because of "Ghosts"....accept it you are not going to convince them they are wrong. I did not buy the home.

Edited by old wanderer
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This has to go down as one of the most horrible threads ever on the forum.

To the OP, get a life and get out of the house, you live in Thailand no? You should not be able to make it past the first seven eleven without meeting women. Your post made it sound as if your searching out endangered species. Smile, be polite and let things take a natural course in finding someone compatible.

Everybody who has married a girl from Isarn has some kind of story, they all vary but few of the better longterm relationships have occured as a result of someone searching for a wife. Healthy marriages are the results of friends that get together and decide they want to stay together, both have something to offer each other and it goes way beyond the physical attraction.

It makes me more than uncomfortable to see people bringing up the names of cities and universities and describing how to troll for women around villages. While the original poster may have had the best intentions others reading this forum do not. Many perverts/pedophiles/dirtbags lurk around the forum never signing on or posting that have never been to Thailand. Providing detailed instructions for them to prey upon Isarn and its women is just a bad idea. If you feel someone like the OP has legitimate questions maybe you should PM them and even talk on the phone or just introduce them to your sister in law.

As far as bar girl or non bar girl wives I have seen both types go wrong and both types become good relationships. Its funny how American culture now views dating strippers and porn stars as wholesome but it seems everytime Thailand is mentioned on American TV it is related to some act of prostitution and the word whore gets thrown around. Please be careful about throwing the bargirl term around, it can be very hurtful to some nice people, we dont always know the whole story of how or why people do things when they are young but everybody likes a happy ending. If people meet in a bar and it works out, good for them.

As far as Vespa, I have never in my life heard a hetrosexual male describe a jawline as a sexual attraction and I believe the Homosexuals on the forum would find him just as offensive as I do. That leads me to one conclusion, I believe the police in Lopburi should be on the lookout for a Fawrong at the monkey wat trying to chat up both male and female monkies with prominent jawlines.

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Please be careful about throwing the bargirl term around, it can be very hurtful to some nice people, we dont always know the whole story of how or why people do things when they are young but everybody likes a happy ending. If people meet in a bar and it works out, good for them.

As far as Vespa, I have never in my life heard a hetrosexual male describe a jawline as a sexual attraction and I believe the Homosexuals on the forum would find him just as offensive as I do. That leads me to one conclusion, I believe the police in Lopburi should be on the lookout for a Fawrong at the monkey wat trying to chat up both male and female monkies with prominent jawlines.

Agree with the bargirl part completely

As for the monkey chasing, I too have always thought a defined jawline as a favourite amoung homosexual males.....

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Good post.

Old Wanderer >> I have another side of a similar story to yours to tell. A family in a nearby village gained some extra cash from a farang. They built in the downstairs, concreted and tiled the garden... beautiful, everyone thought...

Now they have no breeze where they sit in the evening. They have no little bit of garden to grow their chili and papaya. They are living someone else's dream, not their own...

Na khrap.

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I see this topic is over a month old but I'll still give my one baht. I love Isaan girls because like I said here in 2005, they make up for the Black women I've never had. But now I need a new Asian; one that won't end every question with "dai mai kah". You're welcome for wasting your time.

I have read this post several times and I still don't understand it. I must be a bit dim.

I think you are saying you initially liked Isaan girls but now find them boring ? Now you want a new racial stereotype ? (But I still don't get the black bit).

I am probably wrong.

I had no intention of finding an Isaan girl, nor any long term relationship, but I met my girl and she happens to be Isaan. And now I have come to appreciate the qualities that, with some generalisation, can be attributed to her Isaan-ness.

Cheers,

Mike

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I had no intention of finding an Isaan girl, nor any long term relationship, but I met my girl and she happens to be Isaan. And now I have come to appreciate the qualities that, with some generalisation, can be attributed to her Isaan-ness.

Mike

A litle similar to me but not quite, only visited Thailand with 2 mates after they pestered me for months about it, had NEVER found any asian women attractive, never done anything for me think I mentioned earlier I was adament I was to lust after blonde scandanavians for the rest of my life. Within a day or 2 (actually more like a few hours) of setting foot on Thai soil I was and still am a converted man. The 2 girls I spent most of my 2 holidays with were both from Isaan and I havnet been the same since i've been back in the UK. 6 months on, NO interest in English/Europeans girls at all and already counting down the days til I return

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I see this topic is over a month old but I'll still give my one baht. I love Isaan girls because like I said here in 2005, they make up for the Black women I've never had. But now I need a new Asian; one that won't end every question with "dai mai kah". You're welcome for wasting your time.

I have read this post several times and I still don't understand it. I must be a bit dim.

I think you are saying you initially liked Isaan girls but now find them boring ? Now you want a new racial stereotype ? (But I still don't get the black bit).

I am probably wrong.

I had no intention of finding an Isaan girl, nor any long term relationship, but I met my girl and she happens to be Isaan. And now I have come to appreciate the qualities that, with some generalisation, can be attributed to her Isaan-ness.

Cheers,

Mike

This happens to most people mike who look for enrichment in their lives, they get infected with the magic that is life in Isaan :o Nignoy
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Hello All

Brand new to your forum. Was looking for a place to post an introduction but didn't, see one so decided to jump in.

Made my first trip LOS in November. Met a lady during my travels that I fell in love with. She was the prettiest woman I had ever seen. Very sweet and caring woman. When I was leaving to go back home she asked me if I would come back to visit her in her home. I asked where home was, she said Issan. As I said this was my first trip so I had no Idea where Issan was. That is how I came across this forum. I am doing as much reserach on Issan as I can as I plan on going back to visit this special lady in a couple of months. Know I will get grief for this, but yes I have fallen for her.

Enjoy reading all of the posts from everyone makes me even more excited to return.

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Trust me I am being very careful. So much so that it bothers her that I ask so many questions. But if answers not right I am gone. But as I said before I have fallen for her. Thanks for the advice and I am sure I will have many more posts with questions for all of you.

Thanks

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Generally I have found a number of people giving sound advice and thanks. Coming off a 12 year marriage that went to the rocks it is not easy to bounce up with bags of confidence like Mai Krap seems to think live is like. So wait until you have a problem.

I will try and focus on a few days away in Issan and maybe expat bars in Pattya for couples but meeting is not so easy here in Sattahip as many are shy and others require an introduction.

Keep advice coming

JGV

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Suay you say?

Could this be where the word originated then? suay mak mak (very beautiful)

just a thought, but could explain a lot of things... :o

Think they are one of the minority groups originally from Laos ,My wife is from the Poo-thai group also originally from Laos ,but she certainly doesnt look like poo.

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Trust me I am being very careful. So much so that it bothers her that I ask so many questions. But if answers not right I am gone. But as I said before I have fallen for her. Thanks for the advice and I am sure I will have many more posts with questions for all of you.

Thanks

Hi mate and welcome to ThaiVisa, think theres an introduction section somewhere on here try the general room I think? As for the lady in question, I think every persons story will be different. Was my first trip to LOS last summer too, fell for a couple of Isaan ladies and still in touch with them 2 or 3 times a week, and I plan to see them both when I get back out there this May... Cant bloody wait to be honest with you. You cant help but fall for them can you?

There are a lot of scare stories out there (Private Dancer is a good read) and I guess many of them are true, but then theres the happy ones that you dont (as often) hear about. IMO the vast majority of members in this room love the place an the women too

Good luck and hope things work out well for you

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There are a lot of scare stories out there (Private Dancer is a good read) and I guess many of them are true, but then theres the happy ones that you dont (as often) hear about. IMO the vast majority of members in this room love the place an the women too

Hi Glenbat

You've got it about right. I get all the inuendo's and piss-taking in the UK,but I believe I am to have a happy future in LOS. Like you my heart is in Thailand, House built,Shop Built,Loving relationship and TWO BLOODY MONTHS TO GO BEFORE I MOVE OVER THERE. I CANNOT WAIT!! :o:D:D

Regards

Dave (body in Surrey) :D:D

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Hi Glenbat.

Thanks for the welcome.

I hear what you are saying about each story being different. I knew right away there was something different about this woman from the others I had met.

I started reading Private Dancer after I returned home. Good read and not a good read at the same time, kept thinking about my new lady friend.

I speak to her every couple of days and makes my day to hear her voice. I also am planning on a visit to her village in late May. Can't wait to get back to LOS and see her

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Dinger I know exactly what you mean, I've just got off the phone from an hr long call from an Isaan lass who rings me at work bless her, I'm 29 but feel like a sodding 14 year old everytime I speak to her, remember those teenage feelings? No other way to describe them! Silly little things she says, the way she says them

'I miss you very mushhhh fat pig' (private joke by the way)

'sorry to disturrrrb'

and the little darling always finishes off with..... 'Dont eat too mushhhhhhh aww-roight?' :D

Makes my day it really does and i'm already counting down the days til I get back out there.. 15 weeks and 4 days in fact :o:D

I reckon this is the best forum by far for advice and info on Isaan living and relationships etc I really do

Dave i'm not quite as far gone as you mate (wish I was), got a couple of years left here I reckon then i'll be ready and everything sorted so I can make the move to LOS

ps I am available for adoption anyone? :D

Edited by glenbat
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Good post.

Old Wanderer >> I have another side of a similar story to yours to tell. A family in a nearby village gained some extra cash from a farang. They built in the downstairs, concreted and tiled the garden... beautiful, everyone thought...

Now they have no breeze where they sit in the evening. They have no little bit of garden to grow their chili and papaya. They are living someone else's dream, not their own...

Na khrap.

It seems everyone wants to close in the down stairs. A few years ago my wifes 90 something yearold grandma needed some remodling so I got the bill, No problem there as I loved the woman dearly. The first thing that was brought up was closing in the down stairs. I put a stop on that before it got started and the reason was it had always been a dirt floor under the house with hammocks and everyone including 20 or more grandkids would just tend to walk right in and hang out with grandma. I knew if they inclosed it that it would no longer be such a welcoming and cool place to hide from the sun and I was worried that the kids would no longer hang around grandma. One family member even said I was being cheep but in the end I got my way since I was paying the bill. In a compremise we built 2 rooms on one side, a small one meter wall on one side with chainlink fence going up to semi enclose and seperate a area for the kitchen. We tiled and left the entire downstairs completely open aside from a bench that runs the length of the floor. I have to admit it worked out quite well and is the favorite place to this day for the whole family to hang out even one year after grandma has left this earth.

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I forgot about this. Lady Isaan good. Then I got bored. Now I like Korea lady in America on student visa. I'm already tired of the food tho.

Korean women can be fantastic, Ive been there a few times. But man is that food boring, I told a couple guys I hated Korean food and they thought I was crazy but how in the helll can you compare Kimchi and Tofu with French Indochinese, Vietnamese, and Thai foods. The food around my house is beyond most peoples imagination and puts 5 star restraunts to shame most days. My wife just brought me a fantastic salad, everything garden fresh and toped over with virgen olive oil and imported feta cheese, time to go!

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  • 3 months later...
The Esaan look is very boring and common , in fact they are dime a dozen where ever you go - especially in the bar scene , if that is were you go looking for you wife before moving up to Nakon Nowhere with her :D

I am sending this fool a warning for disrespectful comments.

I was going to edit his posts but it may serve us as a reminder of what a bigot's post looks like.

:o

I agree with you, once a bigot always...but at the end of the day it is his insecurities that he sleeps with. Not a person who can love and respect for the who NOT that what!!! loneliness is lie stress it is the silent killer....

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  • 3 weeks later...
There have been a number of reports lately about marriages between Issan women and farangs bringing prosperity to parts of Issan and the women becoming farang in their eating habits. Successly relationships they seem to be generally

I am 2 years now seperated and live alone but would like to meet and possibly reside in Issan. Where do you meet prospective wives? The bars are really risky and agencies are just money making machines so it must be personal introduction friend of a friend I guess any advice on this. I don't live in Pattaya but down in Sattahip

Constructive advice only please

John

Ken Bower here. I've been married to my Issan wife for 13 years now. It has been a very unique relationship and the most possitive of my whole 71 yr. life. A rather unique relationship in that

1. We lived for 20 mo. In Chiayaphum, in her childhood home which we modified to our "tastes/needs" and everyone who lived within a block in a half ARE relatives.

2. That I dearly love each and every member of my wife's family as my own.

3. That at NO TIME have any of her relatives asked for one satong/baht

4. That even though we recently took on an apartment in Bangkok, it was only because the rent

was less than what we were spending on hotels for our usual 2 five nite trips to BKK to visit all our

friends that live there full time, and to take care of all doctor's appointments, dentist appointments, picking up my APO (U.S. mail), and being able to see movies (one of my favorite hobbies) in English, and shopping in malls, stores, groceries that actually have everything I crave for that isn't available in Tesco, the ONLY reliable outlet in Chiayaphum.

5. The fact that our mutual agreement B4 we decided to live in retirement full time in Thailand included an agreement that we WOULD split each month between Chiayaphum and Bangkok/Pattaya/and other locations I chose. This agreement "may" be the best necessity to retain sanity in living in Thailand full time. See, it's only IMHO, but I think that living full time in Isaan can lead to any farang's decreasing hold on reality and living full time in Bangkok can waste one's vision of what Thailand is really all about so splitting each month between the two makes my wife very happy in that she gets to spend ample time with ALL her family and spending half of each month in BKK gives me plenty of time to visit/socialize with all our Thai and farang friends here AND to get my fill of movies, shopping, and other activities.

6. I must state that I am a bit odd as a farang in that I am an incillin dependent diabetec, whose had two heart events, and I do NOT smoke or drink, but socialize with many friends who enjoy both, and it's not an issue ever with me.

A while back someone on this forum or perhaps one of the other 58 I belong to, said something that stuck in my mind that I'd like to share here, not so much as a warning, but just as a thought.

This poster had mentioned that 90% of all problems with maintaining long term relationships with Thai women had to do with the farang NOT being condusive to handing out money/favors to all her relatives, or supporting the "family unit". I am not even smart enough to know if I agree with this statement or not because it doesn't apply to me, but IF that is true, then I would agree with what the poster said next.

His advise was first of all, never look at bargirls as longterm companions but always pursue ladies who work as shopkeepers/shopworkers, or those working in malls, restaurants, coffee shops etc. Then pursue finding out which of your favorites have large families in Isaan or whatever area you prefer, and eliminate all those with close ties to their families, pursuing only those who had cut all ties with their families.

According to the poster, and as I can recall, he stated that the "perfect" Thai partner might be an orphan, with NO ties to family at all. He went on to state that what life with a Thai woman boils down to was her needs to be taken care of (which I would guess would be the farang's ability to financially support all her needs) and her being able to provide not only the physical sex he desired, but conversation in HIS language as well as her own. All I can add is that COMMUNICATIONS is the key to long time relationships (and that I am very longwinded...lol)

Ken

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There have been a number of reports lately about marriages between Issan women and farangs bringing prosperity to parts of Issan and the women becoming farang in their eating habits. Successly relationships they seem to be generally

I am 2 years now seperated and live alone but would like to meet and possibly reside in Issan. Where do you meet prospective wives? The bars are really risky and agencies are just money making machines so it must be personal introduction friend of a friend I guess any advice on this. I don't live in Pattaya but down in Sattahip

Constructive advice only please

John

I live in the uk with my stunning issan wife and if you want to see a pic of her i will send it to you.

Isaan women tend to be ugly , there are many available Thai women mixed with Chinese blood that are very attractive and unlike Issan women they do not all look alike.

Why not set your goals a little bit higher ?

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