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A Joke About Fish And Chips: (an English Joke)


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A boy went into a fish & chip shop and asked for cod and chips.

The proprietor asked the lad:

"Do you want salt 'n' vinegar on that?"

to which the boy replied:

"No thanks. I've got my bike outside!"

:o

Thanks, Libya. Only 199 more hearings to go and I'll be in heaven!

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1950 cup final Warrington v Widnes. Two Naughton brothers played in the final, Danny & Johnny. One was playing for Warrington and one for Widnes. After the prentation, The losing brother gave the winning one his medal.

Easier question. Which was the first team in the south of England to play rugby league. Clue - they did make national news headlines!

I could be wrong but does a rugby league trivia quiz belong here? Or perhaps rugby league is a joke????!!!!

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Or.........a man goes into a chip shop and asks.."Got any chips left???" ..."Yes", answers the chip shop owner. "Then you shouldn´t have fried so many", answers the man............ :D:o

Again, not guaranteed to bring the house down....but light years better than the original "joke" here..........(which the OP has obviously just cocked up.......................... :D )

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It is a long, long time since White Cross, Guiseley was worth stopping at.

My mother's folk all lived near there and it was a treat to go to HR's when I was a lad. But, by the time I was forty, it was a disappointment. Mother Hubbard's was better, if you wanted a sit-down do.

But they always tasted better when eaten out of newspaper, stood under a streetlamp, five miles away in Idle.

Ah, Memory Lane!!!

hehe I was born in Idle, small world. We used to get fish&chips on the Green, every friday. took me back that, cheers.

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Or.........a man goes into a chip shop and asks.."Got any chips left???" ..."Yes", answers the chip shop owner. "Then you shouldn´t have fried so many", answers the man............ :D:o

Again, not guaranteed to bring the house down....but light years better than the original "joke" here..........(which the OP has obviously just cocked up.......................... :D )

I liked that one 'Nongwahyay' !

I will post the explanation to my original posted joke in the New Year; as I said previously, it is difficult for non-U.K. nationals to understand, the few that have understood it come from Lancashire.

More great jokes lined up for 2007!

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  • 4 months later...

A man goes into a fish and chip shop and says can I have 'Ghost' and the owner says this is a fish and chip shop not a DVD hire shop.

The next day the same man goes into the fish and chip shop and says can I have 'Goldfinger' and the owner says this is a fish and chip shop not a DVD hire shop.

The next day the same man goes into the fish and chip shop and says.....................

Can I have 'A fish called wanda'?

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I grew up in north-east England on fish and chips.................but I still don´t get it at all.........................
Try this one, a chap goes into simons fish and chip shop and says fish and chips twice . ..SimoN says "I HEARD YOU THE FIRST TIME " !
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Libya, may I help you here? A joke is something said or done to provoke laughter or cause amusement, as a witticism, a short and amusing anecdote. Your 'joke' has been viewed 411 times and this is the 25th reply. You replied to my fish joke with 'Not Bad, But I refer you to my hilarious Fish & Chip joke on this board, which has attracted much attention.............. ' How many replies say that it is hilarious? How many just say'??????' Even a heavy reworking will only produce

A boy went into a fish & chip shop and asked for cod and chips.

The proprietor asked the lad:

"Anything on it?"

To which the boy replied:

"I want it on my bike!"

Still not amusing, were you trying to do something similar to the old lady asked the greengrocer for 2 lbs of potatoes?

"I'll have 2 pounds of potatoes."

"Will you take King Edwards?"

"No let him come and get his own"

For those who are not familiar with the term 'King Edward' in this context is a type of potato. I hate explaining jokes but felt that because some readers are not familiar with the term may need assistance.

Normally, if you have to explain a joke then it is not funny. Can you show your face on this topic and explain it so that we might be able to improve it for you?

Right ,you started it,, ONCE UPON A TIME THERE WAS KING EDWARD POTATO, A QUEEN EDWARD POTATO AND A PRINCESS EDWARD POTATO, ONE DAY AS THE PRINCESS WAS APPROACHING 12 YEARS OLD THE KING SAYS TO THE PRICESS EDWARD POTATO, " WHAT DO YOU WANT TO DO WHEN YOU ARE OLDER " , PRINCESS EDWARD POTATO REPLIES, " I WANT TO MARRY THAT EDDY WARING ON TV,. THE KING SCREAMS AT HER " YOU CANT MARRY EDDY WARING,. HES JUST A COMMONTATER ! "
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1950 cup final Warrington v Widnes. Two Naughton brothers played in the final, Danny & Johnny. One was playing for Warrington and one for Widnes. After the prentation, The losing brother gave the winning one his medal.

Easier question. Which was the first team in the south of England to play rugby league. Clue - they did make national news headlines!

I could be wrong but does a rugby league trivia quiz belong here? Or perhaps rugby league is a joke????!!!!

Are you lot smoking that stuff with the funny smell? what with this joke ? and gone off topic something odd is going on !
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It is a long, long time since White Cross, Guiseley was worth stopping at.

My mother's folk all lived near there and it was a treat to go to HR's when I was a lad. But, by the time I was forty, it was a disappointment. Mother Hubbard's was better, if you wanted a sit-down do.

But they always tasted better when eaten out of newspaper, stood under a streetlamp, five miles away in Idle.

Ah, Memory Lane!!!

hehe I was born in Idle, small world. We used to get fish&chips on the Green, every friday. took me back that, cheers.

I haven't been back for a few years, but I will be there next month and will look to see if 'The Idle Friar' is still on The Green.

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  • 5 months later...

Looks like you got a few bites using the old non-joke trick, but why did you copy it almost verbatim from another website? Would have been better to make your own.

Non-Joke Information

Okay. Have you ever told a non-joke? It's an amusing thing done amongst drunk people who've got a bit giggly. It involves, in the middle of a protracted session of joke telling, relating a joke like this. This fish walks into a chip shop, and says, portion of single chips please. The guy behind the counter says, would you like salt and vinegar with that? And the fish replies, no thanks, my bike's outside. See, if you tell it right, you will actually get people to laugh. And then a glorious confused look will come over their face, as they try and work out exactly what the joke is. Eventually you put them out of their misery, and tell them there isn't a joke at all. Yeah, yeah, it's perverse and childish, but if you judge the mood right it's great fun.

That post was dated 2004, much earlier than your post.

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A boy went into a fish & chip shop and asked for cod and chips.

The proprietor asked the lad:

"Do you want salt 'n' vinegar on that?"

to which the boy replied:

"No thanks. I've got my bike outside!"

:o

Libya... great post. Isn't there a follow up something like...

...

Next day the boy's sister went into the fish & chip shop and asked for cod and chips.

The proprietor asked the sister:

"Do you want salt 'n' vinegar on that?"

to which the sister replied:

"No thanks. I'm on my menstrual cycle..."

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I grew up in north-east England on fish and chips.................but I still don´t get it at all.........................

I don't get it either.

>>>I grew up in north-east England on fish and chips

...did you ever order "one of each twice with scraps"?

Cheers,

John_Betong

[edited - forgot something]

As a Scouser, myself, I grew up on the stuff! Fish 'n' Chips, Scollops 'n' Chips, Egg <deleted>-Yung 'n' Chips etc....

I dont get the joke EITHER! :o

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  • 2 weeks later...

Are all you people blind or are you just stupid? Go read my post again. This is not a joke. It is a non-joke and not even an original one. Libya just copied the non-joke from here or some other place on the web where almost the exact same non-joke was posted way before Libya posted it here. It's designed to catch idiots like you into thinking it's a joke. IT IS NOT A JOKE!!!! Got it yet? Sheesh, no wonder Libya's able to post non-jokes and total crap jokes here with so many idiots.

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This one is funnier.

One day while driving home from his fishing trip in the pouring rain, a man got a flat tire outside of a monastery. A monk came out and invited the man inside to have dinner and to spend the night. The stranded motorist gladly accepted the monk's offer.

That evening the man had a wonderful dinner of fish and chips. He decided to compliment the chef.

Entering the kitchen, the man asked the cook, "Are you the fish friar?" "No," the chef replied, "I'm the chip monk."

Edited by Momo8
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  • 10 months later...

By strange coincidence, following the constant heavy rain in Pattaya and Jomtien I purchased some fish and chips and Gaviscon at Simon's in Jomtien and I was reminded of this Lancashire joke which so many people on Thai Visa enjoyed all those years ago.

I think I will be forgiven for ressurecting (it). We could all do with a good laugh in the 'rainy season'.......... :o

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