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5 years here,but this has left me stunned


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1 hour ago, richard_smith237 said:

Really ???? Neve been on a vacation, don't use cards, never booked a hotel ???.... come again !!! ????

 

I'm left wondering if your only exposure to Thailand is with laborers, migrant workers and hookers... 

 

You must be a city person. Before I met the gf she had never been on a train. let alone a plane, never been to Bangkok, never had a holiday because she had to work and suppport her family.

Reads like a snotty nose to me.

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So you have a stupid, Thai ex-wife.  You've been here 5 years, which you mean to indicate you've been around and know the ropes. 

 

So you hook up with another stupid but smokin' hot Thai bird.... with two kids.  

 

You agree to pay for everything and give her an allowance, in exchange for sex and "free" room and board at her house. 

 

You pay to renovate the top floor of her house, for your comfort.

 

You don't like them enough to go on holiday with them in the first place.  And you don't want to be the walking ATM sucker who winds up paying for EVERYTHING.  You ain't fallin' for that old trick.  Again!  

 

So you advance her the monthly allowance + extra spending cash, pay out the nose for their accommodation and return travel arrangements.  

 

In other words, you paid for EVERYTHING but didn't go!  Ha ha, you showed her! 

 

Sorry mate but your smokin' hot Thai GF is NOT the stupid one in this scenario.

 

She may not even like you but if you're "smart" enough to pay for everything including their holiday to Phuket, she's got no problem leaving your ass at home.   She and her kids be like, "See ya' later sucka!"

 

 

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You must be a city person. Before I met the gf she had never been on a train. let alone a plane, never been to Bangkok, never had a holiday because she had to work and suppport her family.
Reads like a snotty nose to me.


We each justify our experiences...

For many, myself included, the differences and gulf in life experiences would just be too great to find any common ground with someone who can't even book a hotel room....

You may call that snotty, others call it common sense. I call it not shacking up with the first poverty stricken sapling who's only future is the pocket of a western prince.....





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If you have to pay an allowance to her.. it should tell you everything. 
10 years here and TV members still amaze me.. 

22 years here and pay allowance for the last 17 years with pleasure. You are amazed?
To the OP, I am not really surprised by your story, it is really unbelievable how may miscommunications and misunderstandings happen even between Thai.
I always have the impression that if they can understand it wrong, they do...
I understand your frustration but in this case she was disconnected from her daily environment and thus more prone to disorientation, add to that the different dialect and you get all ingredients for a perfect storm.


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At least your plan to move hot gal #1 and kids out of your house to the other end of Thailand, so you could have fun in your house with hot gal #2 seems to have worked out OK, despite the 'extra' cost :)

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1 hour ago, GreasyFingers said:

Well in my experience with farang women with kids you just give them (the kids) back when you walk away. Never a lifetime burden.

Exactly. Far less of a worry. People who have 3,4 or 5 kids of their own are stuck with them for decades.

 

If your partner has kids who cares. As long as you arent stupid enough to pay for them it's a non issue.

 

The kind of women who are 30yo+ with no kids are no good. They are barren.

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1 hour ago, A1Str8 said:

Some of them do. Many of them don't. I have been with more women in my life than I could possibly count. Many over thirty. 

A lot of them didn't have kids. But I am talking about proper women, good looking hot educated smart well off chicks that stand on their on feet, not the average girl from udon and Pattaya. 

Maybe we move in different social circles. I rejoice in our differences. 

You sound full of it. Most do have kids. What kind of retarded barren women dont want them? Rejects.....

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15 minutes ago, BigKahuna said:

You sound full of it. Most do have kids. What kind of retarded barren women dont want them? Rejects.....

I just think differently that's all. Just because you keep repeating that most have kids it won't make it true. 

Some do, many don't. 

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1 hour ago, richard_smith237 said:

You may call that snotty, others call it common sense. I call it not shacking up with the first poverty stricken sapling who's only future is the pocket of a western prince.....

make sure the lock on your purse is impregnable.

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1 hour ago, richard_smith237 said:

You may call that snotty, others call it common sense. I call it not shacking up with the first poverty stricken sapling who's only future is the pocket of a western prince.....

You are so lucky to only mingle with hiso chinese (that used to be a common theme on here but not heard it for a while) and not the peasants or hookers.

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10 hours ago, petermik said:

Find another..........this one is brainless.....sorry for being so blunt :thumbsup:

How's she brainless? It's not her money, why should she worry.

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6 hours ago, fittobethaied said:

Okay, let me get this straight.  YOU picked out what YOU thought would be a comfortable 2 bedroom apartment for her and the kids, but no doubt she didn't have a clue that you would be charged for the full amount for the no show, and if so, she probably could care less since that wasn't coming out of HER money that you gave her to spend on the trip.  A grass mat under a tree would have suited her and the kids just fine if she thought she could save herself 6000 baht, so the story about the taxi driver was all bogus and it was probably her idea to stay at the cheaper place and pocket the difference.  And, if you will be deducting the 12T plus the 6T from next month's allowance, then that means you're giving her at least 18T a month which is waaaaaaaaaaaaay too much to begin with.  Any girl that gets that much money thrown her way each month has no idea of the value of UNEARNED money, so what other kind of behavior could you possibly expect. Any relationship that is based on companionship for hire by allowance is destined to failure.  Unfortunately, we expats have been brainwashed into believing that this is the way relationships are supposed to function between falangs and Thais, and that is simply not always the truth. 

Wow !   Harsh! But realistic. :smile:

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allowance, salary, bonus...  some do it some say your crazy?   II guess we dont know how much or why this gal is getting support from her farang... I think most thai gals think about support... but I have met a few who want to stand on their own two legs and are stubborn about it... 

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Let's see, 5 pages and over 100 responses, and the OP has disappeared (and not replied once)...I think that once again, everyone responding seriously to the OP has been taken for a ride by a troll.

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6 minutes ago, Farang hunter said:

do you guys know why i hate falling in love because If I do I will be like a sheep but who knows maybe being a sheep is good idea 

so what you think ..should i  go for it

Is the sheep smoking hot? No question get in there ooo bahhhh

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So your plan to save money on her vacation didn't work out. I guess that one should go under the list of don't make plans in Thailand? Or don't get to upset if they do go tits up. I hope you can get over it without docking her too much salary, you may have trouble getting one as hot no matter how easily these other TV guys can get hot girls; you are you not them.

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5 hours ago, Farang hunter said:

do you guys know why i hate falling in love because If I do I will be like a sheep but who knows maybe being a sheep is good idea 

so what you think ..should i  go for it

No reason to fall in love in Thailand unless you really need it. I was happy playing the field for 3 decades and not getting hurt.

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14 hours ago, williamgeorgeallen said:

i have a few friends living in thailand wanting to start families. they said the dating sites are now just full of hookers. makes sense as there are not so many new ones coming through the bars.  

your dead right some of the site are but not all sites thai frxxxdly is full of hookers. i use a site called taggxd never come across a hooker on there but im sure there are some. i met and still see a 38 year old thai lady her and her family own 2 hotels so you can meet some descent girls online.

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15 hours ago, BigKahuna said:

So they were sluts with low standards. Not much different from hookers.

a lot different, hookers you pay sluts are free :cheesy: if you've been in Thailand any length of time and been around a bit you will have learned that all Thai women are easy to get into bed they just look at sex in a different way to us.:smile:

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You cannot blame her.  Think about it  ...  you booked a hotel and it may be far from town  ?   it wasn't her choice of location or hotel anyway so do you think thats fair as it's only your choice and not hers and you aren't the one staying there.

She finds something more suitable and shes fine with it ....  it's not her fault you cannot get a refund of the 12k ...  thats your dumb choice of booking agents.

You should have let her go there and choose a place that suits then you send the $$ to pay ....  

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11 hours ago, Elkski said:

allowance, salary, bonus...  some do it some say your crazy?   II guess we dont know how much or why this gal is getting support from her farang... I think most thai gals think about support... but I have met a few who want to stand on their own two legs and are stubborn about it... 

 

I only like those that want to work themselves and can support themselves, at least then you know they are not in it for the money. Now if your married and have kids its a different story.  But then again we are all different and all have different ideas. If your paying you probably could get prettier ones and younger ones then when your not paying. 

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13 hours ago, BigKahuna said:

You sound full of it. Most do have kids. What kind of retarded barren women dont want them? Rejects.....

I tend to disagree. I know more 30+ year olds that do not have children. They work and simply don't have time or the means.  I met my wife when she was 40.  She worked long hours at the hospital and took care of her dying mother for years.  Was she a reject? NO WAY. Honestly I have great respect for her. Just because a women isn't a single mother doesn't make her a reject, in fact I see it the opposite. Why is she a single mother?

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17 hours ago, champers said:

If she is smoking hot that is one thing to consider. Also the OP says her children are very polite which shows they are well brought up by a good mother.

This seems to be a misunderstanding; a culture clash if you like. I think the OP has a short temper and needs to calm down a bit. Don't ruin a family's life over one small incident. 

Thanks,i have calmed down,i called her and said okay she made a mistake,we can all do that when travelling,not to worry and have a good time,reason i did not go as i am busy dealing with other matters at present.She is not a bad person,or an ex bar girl,niether is she brainless,just a bit ditzy. As other posters have said 12,000 baht is nothing,and upon reflection,no i did not consult her on where she wanted to stay and no i did not tell her i would be charged if she was a no show, so i guess i am at fault here as well,and i fully admit that,i am not going to make a big deal out of it,she is too good a girl to ditch cos of a as champers says misunderstanding.

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16 hours ago, Thaidream said:

Most thais in a relationship with a Westerner have never been on vacation; do not use credit cards and certainly have never booked a hotel  period. Most come from families of very simple means. In addition, when children are involved- they are not getting support from the children's father.  I would never assume a thai from this background would ever understand much of anything about hotel deposits; booking deadlines; cancellation etc. Why would you?  They do not have the same experience as we Westerners have.

I hold to my original premise- the ignorant one is the  Op because he did not explain to his consort the facts. In addition, paying 12K Baht per night for a condo is ridiculous and his Girlfriend knew it. The OP should apologize to his girlfriend for over reaction and explain to her how things work when handling such a situation. He learned a 12,000 Baht lesson but I doubt he really understand why.

12,000 for 5 days. But i accept i did not explain about no show fees ect,and i agree i guess as i am so used to doing this, i did not think about it from her perspective,also i have apologised and told her she made a mistake but we can all do that when travelling,heck i have in the past,so i fully accept your veiws,but it was 12,000 for 5 nights ,not 1.

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